11. Collapse Game
Collapse Game
Darkness and light: deep space, dream and science fiction outside of time
Have you ever played a folding game?
It’s lying on the side, with the torso straight, in the word “one” and then starting to shrink and fold inside.
Until all the joints and parts of the body are caught in the arms as a “round”.
It’s a process from 1 to 0, from there to nothing.
When you fold, you’ll be in “nil”.
It can be understood — it disappears.
In the living room, I can imagine the scene described in this phrase, and it’s really easy to do it, but it’s just like being lost in space. How can a living man disappear in vain?
“I know you don’t believe me,” with a high-legged cup, my wife wrapped around my neck, smiling in my eyes, and talking with a red vertigo licking the tide of the beach, “a mathematician friend told me. I’m sorry.
“Mathematician?”
“Yes, mathematicians are also philosophers. I’m sorry.
The wife sits on the couch, and she’s totally drunk and she talks more like a murmur. We came home from work to drink and celebrate our anniversary, and we’ve been together for many years.
The wife was very excited, and she began to say, “Where do you think the world, no, the heavens and the earth, the universe come from? I’m sorry.
“Well, the book says from the Big Bang, the Big Bang. I’ve been thinking a little and I’ve given the answer.
“So, you think all this has evolved from a tiny substance, even a simple element? I’m sorry.
“That’s how you understand…”
“And where did that initial element of all this come from? I’m sorry.
Well, I couldn’t think of anything, so I had to say, “It’s an absolute question with no answer. I’m sorry.
“No! No! “The wife suddenly sits up and shines in the light of excitement, “from nothing.” Nothing, mathematicians think that the universe, the heavens and the earth, we were born from nothing, and he tried to prove this with geometry or algebras, and after countless calculations and assumptions, half a lifetime, a formula was found. I’m sorry.
“Do you know what this formula means? One is that there is, zero is nothing, it’s a counter-proof law, and if we really come from nothing, then we can certainly go back to nothing. I’m sorry.
I was dumb and laughing.
“Like your reaction, the mathematicians told everyone they knew about the formula, and they all thought he was crazy, laughing at his imagination, without exception, so he had to look for proof that could be demonstrated in reality, visible in the eyes, and after countless experiments, he found a folding game.
“With the determination to disappear, we can go back to nothing. I’m sorry.
Once again, the wife raised the glass, touched me, dinged, the glass made a sound, and the wife drank.
“Well, there are more important things to celebrate today than this…” I’m confused to say.
“Shh,” the wife put her finger on my lips, and said, “There’s nothing more important now. You know, if you can’t take it anymore and you can’t change it then don’t hate yourself, because you can still choose to disappear. I’m sorry.
“Why disappear? I can’t understand her words.
‘Cause you’re gonna do it. It’s a folding game. I’m sorry.
She said she sat on the floor, lying side by side, flattening her torso, like a condensed one.
I smiled and looked at her, and I felt a little drunk and I looked forward to her farce.
The wife is in a position to fold.
She takes a deep breath, stretches out her hands, lifts her legs, hugs her knees, then presses from her neck, folds the upper half into her inner body one inch, from the head, to the chest, to the waist, to the hip…
She looks like a man who tried to avoid the outside world and was hurt, and I’m surprised that her body’s tenacity, folding up, does not fit a laceration, perhaps because of her long years of yoga, and she’s very flexible.
Just as I was thinking, my wife was folded.
She had her head and legs in her arms and had only long backs.
The whole process, as in the reverse evolution, went back from one person to the placenta in the stomach of the original mother.
And then I saw this placenta disappearing a little bit, as if it were being eaten up by empty space.
Finally disappeared.
I was standing in the living room, carrying two glasses, and the night breeze was blowing white curtains, and there was silence.
I slowly realized that my wife disappeared from my face.
I bend over to look at the floor, empty. I knocked, but I didn’t hear the sound of a gap, and I looked everywhere, because the house was very simple and the corner was looking.
The wife has everything but herself.
The only exit far away is closed.
I thought about the fact that my wife was lying there, and then strangling, like the transition from “1” to “0”.
1 = 0, wife disappears.
We come from nothing, and we will certainly go back to nothing.
Is that true?
“Hey, Rain…”
I called my wife’s name several times in the void, without any response.
I need an explanation. People always need an explanation when they encounter a sudden situation.
I think we’ve been arguing for days, and she must have been angry to hide and wouldn’t see me.
Must be.
In the end, with such comfort and unwitting intoxication, I fell on the floor of my wife ‘ s disappearance and closed my eyes in the hope that I would wake up and find it only a prank.
Wake up, sunshine, empty wine cups still standing still, without the sound of a familiar toaster or the smell of hot milk.
I soon realized in the usual morning that the wife had really disappeared.
Half an hour later, I sat in the lobby of the nearby police station and was told that the wife had disappeared too short to file.
“Friends, we’ve dealt with a lot of these things, mostly girls want to break up. “Citizens slap me on the shoulder and say, “Deeply.”
I came out of nowhere, standing under a street billboard to light a cigarette, and in this huge contradiction and feeling, I remembered that the way my wife disappeared was as abrupt as when she appeared.
That was the day of a slightly cold July in Gangnam.
In the rainy season, the tails of the ticking, the sky was gray and the rain was still running, and when I came home at midnight, I saw a girl crouching in front of my house.
She was wearing a thin dress, wet and shivering, and her face was confused and her eyes were like wounded cats.
“I’m sorry, I think I lost my memory. She said:
I hesitated for a while and asked her to come in, which was due in large part to the fact that she was pretty and had a sense of mystery, and I had had enough of a boring life.
Amnesia is only a reminder of the fact that they do psychological work, have an identity card and are completely alien to the information on it.
“That’s not me. She looked out the window at the wet city and said, “Call me Rain.” I’m sorry.
Rain never tried to find the past, and perhaps everyone wanted to bury themselves and start over.
I stood under a billboard, suffocated the smoke, and my mobile phone received a text from a company that I could not help but walk towards the subway station.
There’s always a rose-seller’s wife at the subway station. Me and Rain buy one almost every day before they go to work.
“That girl there. Question of my wife.
“She’s not here today. I’m sorry.
I took roses to the edge of the orbit, looked at the black hole, and the wind blew out a few petals and fell on the tracks.
“You buy my roses every day. That’s a good guy. “The old lady said in the back.
But I didn’t pay attention to her words, but I looked at the deep tunnel.
I look in the shadows and see that there is a long crack in the darkness, as if space was torn open and lightd. It’s like another entrance to another world.
“Come…”
The sound of rain in the cracks, she’s calling me.
At the same time, the train came from afar and was raging in the wind as 10,000 wild horses were running.
In this dreamlike vision, I feel my soul slowly leaving the ground.
I jumped.
The crowds on the rails broke out of shock, and they looked at me like hell.
The light on the front of the car has hit me in the face, and it’s white in the eye.
Am I going to die?
The soul goes back to the body, and fear is like a giant hand holding me.
“Come on up. A voice said to me, “Now is not the time to die. Now!”
Stranger men, perhaps familiar, seem to have seen one face and face, but stand firm on the side of the orbit and shout at me.
I hit an inspiration, pulled him back into the crowd.
The train stopped screaming behind.
“What is that, a suicide game? I’m sorry.
“Uh…”
Into the car, someone immediately gave us a seat, with curiosity and fear.
I guess I just made me look like an abnormal monster.
The man brought me a piece of information from his purse, with my photo and some profiles on it. A few lines short of an excellent introduction will finish my life.
“Your life is so boring. * He’s lying and he’s handing me another one with a picture of Rain. *
But Rain’s profile is blank.
“She’s gone to nothing,” so it’s blank. He says:
“None”? Do you know… I’m a little surprised.
“I don’t know much about that,” he scratched his head, “but the problem is, I can’t find her either. I’m sorry.
“You, looking for her?”
“Oh,” he sits up straight and clears his throat and says, “Forgetting the official introduction is death, the leader who appears after you die and takes you to another world. I’m sorry.
“…”
“I know you don’t believe it, but something like death is just a job…”
“Reaper what do I need? Did I die?” I interrupted him.
“It’s not… it’s true that your wife has to find her. “I tried, and I was busy, the world was like crazy, dying every day! I’m sorry.
“That’s true…”
“Yes, it’s hopeless…”
He said, “Look, there he is again.” I’m sorry.
The sound just dropped and the train radio started broadcasting a news story, which appeared to have been a tragic car accident, and someone stopped breathing while being rescued.
He took up the bag and didn’t go back.
“But how can I tell you if I find her?”
And some of us left without him, and he was the one who spoke most to me this week.
“Don’t worry, you find her, I’ll come! “Mr. Reaper, calling him Mr. Reaper, shouted outside and waved his arms at me and then disappeared in the crowd.
The train is moving again to the next station.
I sat there, with a blank brain, looking around, lost and unreal.
Honey, where the hell have you been?
I couldn’t wait to think, the train arrived at the next stop, the company called, and I was too late to follow the crowd.
As we got out of the gate, a shock hit me from behind.
“Sorry! I’m sorry.
Turning back, I saw a guy with a dirty head lying at my feet.
He fell.
I’m gonna get him up, he’s swinging his hands, rubbing his knees, and he’s not gonna help.
He was wearing a dirty coat with a long, messy hair and looks like he’s in his mid-50s, with some nerve.
When he gets up, he’s gonna walk.
Something slipped from him, a solo game.
Sudoku, numbers, formulas I see in my head a scene before my wife disappeared.
Uncle, your stuff!
And I went up and handed it to him, and he bowed his head and showed his eyes as sharp as an eagle’s eyes.
“Well, if I may ask, what do you do? I’m sorry.
“Me?” “A poor mathematician, as you can see. I’m sorry.
“1 = 0.
“We come from nothing, and we will certainly go back to nothing.”
“There’s a great river between us, and it’s full of water.
“This is your scarred body, the shackles of every place, and it is your soul’s pure soil, your invisible freedom. And all that is upon thee on this shore, and all that is upon it, shall be purified thereof, and it shall fade away, and it shall become vanity, and it shall be the world; thou art all, and all is thou.
And the bridge from here to the other side is a folding game. I’m sorry.
Mathematician preaching to me in the coffee shop downstairs.
I can’t understand, I can’t believe it.
“Just tell me where Rain went…”
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m sorry.
“But she made your folding game and disappeared. I’m sorry.
Mathematician hawks stare at me, wrinkled his face like some kind of mysterious symbol.
He then shook his head and said, “These are only my conjectures, and I just want to find a heart’s trust and not face the nothingness of life, but I really don’t know what you mean, and I’ve never heard of anyone disappearing in this ridiculous game, and if she does enter nothing, am I right?” I’m sorry.
And suddenly he got excited, and his eyes were frenzy.
I’ve got goose bumps.
“Did you do a folding game? I asked him.
“Of course I have. Whenever I feel hate, I want to disappear…”
When the bell came to him, I took a look at the number and I needed to sit up: “Wait a minute. I’m sorry.
“Well,” he pulled me up and said, “Can I get a bread?” I’m not begging! I just haven’t eaten for a long time…”
And the sharp eyes became in a state of cowardice and shivering from his face.
Nervous, restless, and a little shame.
“Okay…”
I went to the front desk and ordered him a bread, added a cup of coffee and then went into the toilet to answer the phone.
That was the number of the police station, which was left on the cell phone at the time of the morning’s report, and now it’s ringing again.
“Hello! Have you heard from Rain? I’m sorry.
“It’s hard to say, we found a dead woman, like the missing wife you described…”
The wife is dead.
This idea came into my heart.
I remember last week when I went to the beach with my wife.
When the sun was inflammation, with few people on the beach, there was only a young boy playing alone, except for me and her wife, who was sitting on a beach chair and headed towards the sea, and I was almost asleep on a beach chair. When I opened my eyes again, my wife stood humidly in front of me, and the flame turned into a huge shadow behind her. I felt that she and the shadow were covering me. She looked at me in silence, empty eyes looked like a long silence, and then she raised her hand and made the position of a pistol aimed at her temple.
Pop, she pulled the trigger.
A fake death of myself.
Later, however, the boy ‘ s body was found at the bottom of the cliff, and the waves of beating rose and fell.
“…friend, you should come over.”
“Okay…”
I hung up on the phone and I walked out of the bathroom and went back to the lobby and found the mathematician missing.
Some of the bread slag on the table turned into a number zero.
Zero, oh, by the way, the boy at the bottom of the cliff is called zero.
The wife named her as our child, the unexpected result.
When his wife decided to give birth to him, she turned her back and gave it to the orphanage. I sometimes went to see the child. He inherited his wife’s face. I loved it, but I never told him I was his father. Last week I took him out on vacation and three of us went to a beach.
“That’s the kid I gave birth to. “The wife looks at the little boy and says,
“Yes, but you chose to abandon him. I’m sorry.
“No, I don’t really have a mother-son relationship with him, or a mother-son relationship that doesn’t exist. I’m just a fertilized container. He existed before me. He came to the world with my body, and so did you. I did with someone else’s placenta.”
The wife said to leave the beach chair and head for the little boy, “It’s just, I’m curious about the source of all this where he came from. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
I got my head on the back of a taxi, and I was thinking about where we came from until we reached the morgue.
“I’m sorry. I was told.
The white cloth was slowly lifted and a blood-stained face appeared before my eyes.
Five officials are exactly like their wives.
But there’s something different.
I can’t say it.
The police told me that they had found her under an abandoned building in the suburbs and witnesses to the scavenging said that she had jumped off the building.
No, I thought she was afraid of heights.
After leaving the morgue, I found the abandoned building by address.
Look up, the twilight ruins floors are like steps to the sky.
I’m trying to look at this ladder in heaven, and I’m getting confused.
“In the back. I’m sorry.
Someone came at me from the middle of the grass.
It’s Mr. Death.
He came towards me smiling, but instead of stopping, he went to the back of the building.
He pulled the grass and showed an empty space.
“This is?” I wonder.
“No, up there. I’m sorry.
And I looked up, and I looked up, and the sky seemed to be ripped open, and a light of gold, and an ant-sized man came out of the light, standing on the roof.
The flames of the lighters appeared and Mr. Death lit a cigarette.
“No!” I yelled at the people on the roof.
But it’s too late for her to jump down like a star.
As soon as I heard my own breath, the time was slow, and when she hit the ground, the concrete ash suddenly became soft, and the purple light opened in circles, making it look like a radiant lake, which provoked a flower.
She fell into the lake and disappeared under the water.
Gradually, all the light was scattered, leaving only the single moonlight.
Then I saw that the lake had become a shadow and that the concrete floor was covered with the body of the wife.
“What’s going on? I’m sorry.
“Fake death. I’m sorry.
“Fake death?”
The smoke is in our midst, and the eyes of Mr. Death are crystals of ice.
He said, “Do you know that sometimes death is only an illusion, life is a reflection of death, death is the real body of life, and heaven on your feet is nothing but a lake.” I’m sorry.
“The lake of the abyss?”
“Yes, she’s still there. These are not hers, but her fake death in your heart. I’m sorry.
Mr. Shinigami’s words were gone from ear to ear, and he returned to the invisible grass.
I looked at the body under my feet, and my stomach fell overboard, and I was dizzy.
I don’t remember how I got home, and I kept thinking about the strange things that made me feel that my wife was just who she was and what she was.
It’s a blank in my world, a body of soul, a vision, death, destruction…
But it’s possible, sin.
The police found me again at 3:00 p.m.
A five-officer man knocked on my door, took out the papers and went straight into the house.
“What can I do for you? I’m sorry.
He took a photo and asked, “Do you know him? I’m sorry.
“I know. I’m sorry.
Of course. The picture is of a little boy who fell at the bottom of a cliff and stayed still.
“That’s good. This little boy died last week at the resort beach. According to our investigation, the little boy lives in the orphanage. I’m sorry.
“Yes, yes. I’m sorry.
“You and your wife gave a statement that you knew nothing about the boy’s crash, so guessed that he fell off the cliff when he played alone. I’m sorry.
I nod my head.
“But yesterday someone called us and gave us some clues. I’m sorry.
“Oh? What clue?”
“She told us you pushed the boy off the cliff. I’m sorry.
I can’t stop crying, and now I feel like I can’t understand it any more. I’m not shaved, I’m not bathed, I’m stinking, I have blood in my eyes, and I don’t look normal.
And I said, “Do you have any proof, then?” I’m sorry.
“No, no. He took out his phone and threw it at me.
It’s a video, and I’m curious to click and play.
In the video, I was lying on a beach chair, staring at a young boy from a distance, who played sand for a while, and seemed to have no interest, and went further away, and I stood up from the beach chair and laughed at the camera and said, “I’ll see where he is going.” Then the camera followed me, and I followed the little boy, and he went to a cliff, and he watched with curiosity, and I walked, and I stood next to the little boy, and I looked down at him.
The little boy then lays down and starts strangling his body slowly, and finally he stomps like he was back in the embryo.
Then, in the video, I slowly pushed him down.
No way, no way!
In my subconscious, or in my mind, it’s always been the wife who left the beach with the little boy, and then the wife came back to me and the little boy was found dead.
Undeniably, I suspected the wife killed the child, the child.
Because everything about a wife is abnormal and indifferent.
“Come with us. He took out his handcuffs and said it in cold.
I don’t feel like going back.
“Wait, who shot this video? I’m sorry.
“Think about it. I’m sorry.
Who else?
Rain.
“A rain…”
I stopped to step back and cuffed my wrist.
“Mr. Lee, your wife’s death is also of concern to you. She informed us yesterday about the phone call and the video. She didn’t disappear, but she’s been running away from you. Do you know what she said to us? I’m sorry.
“What? I’m sorry.
“She said you had serious mental problems, often hallucinogenesis and hearing, and that there was a habit of domestic violence. The night you called the police about her disappearance, it was you who raped her, knocked her down to the ground, she had to strangulate herself against your beating and then ran out of the house in your trance. It was a pain, she couldn’t bear it any longer, and then we found her body that fell down and killed herself, as mentioned in the autopsy report. I’m sorry.
I stayed and listened to this, and said, “No, it’s not so. She abandoned the children, and she left them behind.”
But he was impatient and took me to the bottom of the building, where he was waiting for several police vehicles and for the inhabitants who were constantly visiting.
They stare at me with curiosity and fear, silent.
I feel like my brain lied to me. What the hell is going on?
The video was so real I pushed the kid off the cliff so real I had a touch of it.
I was detained for three days before entering the interrogation room.
They asked me to give details of the killing of the boy and the violent wife.
I did not admit that I told them about the folding of games and mathematicians and Mr. Death and the bodies of those wives on the beach.
They showed disappointment and ridicule, and said, “Well, we’ve been to the open space, there’s no identical body, and even if you’re telling the truth, how does this video explain? We’ve tested your DNA, you murdered your own child! I’m sorry.
“No, I didn’t…”
I was locked back in the bars.
We were not given food on that night, and I looked at the cold walls, and I was hungry, and I couldn’t sleep.
You murdered your own kid.
You can’t remember?
I hear people whispering in the dark in confusion.
Shh. Don’t let them find out.
It’s the wife’s voice.
“Where are you?”
I’m right next to you.
But there’s nothing next to me.
Keep the change. I’m everywhere. I’ve got nothing.
“What’s going on, phantom? Am I really crazy? I’m sorry.
No, honey, you just forget that your memories are real, and they’re true, and both sides are happening at the same time.
“What are you talking about? I’m sorry.
I seemed to hear a sigh, and my wife said softly: “Well, honey, it’s not your fault. Let me help you remember that you stood by the cliff and said to our children…
It was like a lightning strike.
In the dark, I gradually saw me standing by the cliff, saying to the boy…
We told him of his life, then We told him with cruelty: “But we do not want you to come back, and we abandoned you on purpose. I’m sorry.
I saw the shock in his eyes at the beginning, and then a little bit, and he cried.
“You know, if I told you that you could choose for yourself again, choose not to have to take it all back to being born, would you? I’m sorry.
He hesitated for a while, then noded, and his young face was full of resolve.
“Well, do you know how to fold the game…”
He lays down submissively, strangling himself, hiding in his arms, as if he had returned to his mother’s belly and returned to the placenta.
“Boy, you can finally get out. * I’m relieved and I’m crying in two rows *
I pushed him down.
They think I have serious mental problems.
They locked me in a train with a wire and transported me out of the city.
It’s a mental hospital in the mountains.
When the car drove up the hill, I saw the outside.
The giant trees stand on both sides, with thick crowns covering the sun.
like a black flame that covers the sky.
Spread the whole forest.
Silent plants, dark beasts are watching me.
Upon arrival, the transport vehicle returned and I was taken to the main hall, where I saw people in the vast courtyard who were full of strange moves, people crying, people laughing, people silent and people howling.
A doctor said to me, “The rules here are simple: take your medication on time, don’t try to escape, don’t hurt anyone. Only a good child can move out. Do you understand? I’m sorry.
I nod my head.
“It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand. We have a way. I’m sorry.
I went up the stairs, some of the rooms were covered with a mesh, some with only one lock.
“Your condition is not bad. Just stay here. We’ll be here to get you out on time. I’m sorry.
I was divided into a locked room, with a bed, a table and a pool, with a pothole.
“Forgot to get your things. Follow me. I’m sorry.
The doctor took me out of the building and went outside, and we went to the warehouse and I found a small black house next to the warehouse, one head in the bar at the end of the black roof.
“Hey, bread!” The head said to me.
“You…”
I couldn’t believe I looked at him because he was a mathematician.
“You know him? The doctor said, “He ran out the other day, and the result was to lock up the dark house. I’m sorry.
I wanted to talk to him again, but the doctor forced him away.
“He’s a mathematician. I said to the doctor,
“No, he’s like you,” the doctor says, “A madman.” I’m sorry.
The doctor had a very subtle look on his face, and he put his arm on me and locked me in the house.
For the next two days, the doctors will come in and give me pills every day, and the white pills make me slow and confused.
I was sometimes beaten by doctors after taking medication, and he seemed to hate me very much and those of us.
Fortunately, those pills are a pain in the ass.
Blood came out of my mouth, but it didn’t hurt at all.
A week later, after the doctor beat me that day, I was given the opportunity to go out.
“You know, because you didn’t fight back, they beat you up to make you obey, and you can come out if you don’t fight back. A man who claims to be from another planet told me.
I kept in mind that I was given a three-day walk in a row, only to wake up in the middle of the night after the pills failed.
By the fourth day, I saw mathematicians in the yard.
“How did you get in here? He asked me with surprise.
“I remember something I killed my own child. I’m sorry.
“The little boy from the orphanage? I’m sorry.
“How do you know? I asked him with surprise.
“Oh, my friend, it wasn’t you. Rain didn’t kill himself. They just went into nothing. I’m sorry.
“No, don’t say that. They have a video…”
“Is it true what you see? Is this the real world? Look at me,” he said, “If it was all your vision, then how could I exist? We never met before the subway. How could you fantasize about me? I’m sorry.
I looked at him and touched him, and the touch on my hand made me doubt my memory again.
“No,” I said, “How do you know about the boy?” I’m sorry.
“A rain told me. I’m sorry, I lied to you, but I know Rain, and I can say she’s the most familiar person I’ve ever known, but I’m just going out here and I’m afraid you’ll betray me and I’m not telling you the truth.”
What do you mean?
He suffocated: “I was sent here as a psychopath for finding a way to go “none,” when Rain was the doctor here… Everyone didn’t believe me, but after listening to my theory, Rain believed me, and I told her everything I had… We found it together, but she left! I’m sorry.
He had a painful look, “I didn’t have a friend here after she left, I ran out a few times and I got caught back, but I didn’t think I’d met you the last time I ran out, and you told me that Rain went “nil.” I believe you, the folding game worked! I’m sorry.
“I…” I feel a pain in my head, and thinking makes me feel pain.
“Damn, those pills,” he grabbed me, and he said, “Look around, see, if you stay here and take those pills, even if you’re not sick, you’ll go crazy like them.” I’m sorry.
“What are we gonna do…” I’m stupid to ask.
“Listen,” he put his voice down, and said, “We’re going to get out of here. Sunday is the safest time here. I’ll come to you. I’m sorry.
Our conversation quickly caught the attention of the doctors, who came to tear us apart, and the mathematicians gave me a look when they were taken away.
Those pills did corrupt me, and I began to forget, and one second after what happened the first second might forget, while some strange memories entered my mind.
Those aren’t my memories, they’re the psychotics.
I looked like a bystander and they were doing things in my head that were hard to understand.
I started to fear here, deeply afraid.
Okay, Sunday’s coming soon.
But I didn’t see a mathematician all day, and I thought he was gonna give up his escape plan.
At about 1:00 p.m., I heard a lock.
The door was slowly pushed, mathematicians appeared at the door, carrying some rope.
“Did you sleep?” He whispered.
“None. “I’m so excited to sit up, “I thought you played me. I’m sorry.
He laughed and told me the plan. We’re gonna jump out of the window and go back to the wall, where there’s a hidden gap that can drill out.
The windows inside the house were very high and narrow, and we stepped on the bed, and then we put down the rope, and in the night, we crawled like two geckos along the rope a little bit.
But my hands are sweating because of excessive stress.
Suddenly, hands slipped.
“Look out! I’m sorry.
The rope was shaking. I hit the wall, “It’s okay…”
The rope is holding.
But the flashlight came back.
“What are you doing? I’m sorry.
It’s a doctor.
Come on! Jump!”
We went down to the ground, I stomped on my feet, I couldn’t stand up, mathematicians lifted me up, we limped to the wall.
“The madman’s gone! I’m sorry.
The doctor shouted, and the guard came in very quickly, while the whole building made various noises.
They seem to be celebrating me.
A group of flying birds was horrified in the forest far away.
We ran to that gap, about half a man tall, and we went into the woods.
Come back!
The flashlight has been followed very closely, and my injuries have become a liability for escape.
I can’t run anymore. I’m standing there.
“What’s wrong with you? Mathematicians are anxious.
“I… what are we doing? “I feel like I’m suddenly blank, and I don’t understand what I’m doing. And some shrubs and thorns cut through my skin, and I felt numb, and the night wind smelt, and the moon was white.
I looked at him, and some pieces of it were gone.
“Hey, look at me,” he broke my shoulder, “We got out of there, remember? You can’t forget, you can’t forget us! I’m sorry.
“Who are you…”
Who am I?
His old face was sad and sad, but he came up again again soon: “Go on, go on!” I’m sorry.
I was forced to move forward, but the cry behind me arrived.
Stop! I’m sorry.
Bang. A shot.
And he leaped up with a shout, and he ran from me, running from me, running from me, running from me, and the wind squealing in my ears, as if he had come upon a trek.
I saw the fantasy train hit me, and the people in it looked at me with curiosity and fear…
Some cold blood came out of my chest and immersed in his back.
He stopped and wept.
The men on the train went down and the men behind him approached.
Countless people gather around, watching us with empty eyes.
“You’re going to die. He says:
“Yeah. I’m sorry.
The pain has at last awakened me to something in reality, and that is that at this very moment I am a dying man.
“No, there’s still a chance,” he put me down, shivering, and touched my face, and said, “Enter Zero, get to the other side, there is no death, no pain, your body is scarred, so let the soul be free, there is no grave, there is no trap, there is nothing but freedom for everything…”
He laid me down on the side, and he laid himself on the side, and he carried me gently into his arms, and carried my whole body into my arms.
I felt the warmth and cold tears of his body, and everything was losing shape and colour, and the sky was torn open and the light of gold.
The surroundings are gone and the forest becomes the lake.
A building rises behind us, and the floors are like steps through heaven, standing under that crack.
Numerous bodies are piled around us, and they look like shit, and they sink into the bottom of the lake.
The bottom of the lake is full of dark blue light, with long-lasting whaling.
I started slowly from the lake, from my body.
My flesh and mathematicians lie on the lake, and they sink with them, but my soul is free of the shackles.
I look at the steps, beneath my feet is an endless abyss, above my head is a golden paradise.
“Come…”
I heard the wife’s call again.
I took the steps…
I don’t know how long it took to reach the roof.
I stood in front of the cracks, and it seemed like a warm nest, but it made me blind.
I slowly walked in, the light disappeared, and I waited for God to pass, and there was a man sitting far away in the space, and there was a giant tub next to him.
Hello again!
He’s up, he’s head down. It’s Mr. Death.
“Is this nothing?” I wonder.
Mr. Reaper’s hand: “I don’t know what it is, here I don’t know where it is, but I found them.” I’m sorry.
He pointed to the tub.
I’m unconscious, in a giant tub, strangling two people, one wife and one little boy.
I looked at them, and looked at them, as if I had seen the moon through countless nights.
“I think I remember everything…”
“But it doesn’t matter anymore,” Mr. Death said calmly, “Here, the truth, the truth, the relationship is irrelevant, because the end has been doomed from the beginning. I’m sorry.
“Oh, yeah, it’s so futile…”
“I’m sorry, yes … that’s what life is about, and it’s about life and death… but you can choose to go back with me, forget everything, go back to the reality of that creation, and, of course, you can choose to be with them, but in that way you’ll be like dust, floating in the universe forever. “Mr. Death said,
He stares at me, and his eyes are filled with crystals, glittering and glittering, and he shows rivers and mountains.
I know it’s a beautiful world. It’s a world of causes and consequences. It’s a world of temptation.
But…
I know I have the chance to go back and start again, if I compromise and pretend like I did before.
But I’m exhausted, I’m exhausted…
And I stepped into the tub, and lay down gently, and strangled by them, as if we had never left, and as if we had returned to the beginning of life.
1 = 0.
We come from nothing, and we will surely return to nothing.
And all that is upon thee on this shore, and all that is upon it, shall be purified thereof, and it shall fade away, and it shall become vanity, and it shall be the world; thou art all, and all is thou.
I don’t know.
I see myself slowly disintegrating into the universe.
Seven in the morning.
The janitor opened the bathroom door and cleaned up the tubs one by one, and when she cleaned up to the last one, she found an old man in the water with a gray hair floating like seagrass, with sharp eyes open like the eagles.
She screamed and fell and soon attracted nurses and doctors.
It’s a mental hospital.
One of the young nurses saw the body of the elderly in the tub vomiting on the spot.
The older nurse took her outside.
So they talked.
“This old man has lived here for 30 years. The elderly nurse said.
“He was, did he commit suicide?” The young nurse hesitated to ask.
“Looks like it, but it’s not surprising that he committed suicide many times. I’m sorry.
“What’s wrong with him?” I’m sorry.
“You’ve just come here, I don’t know, he’s famous here, he was a mathematician, he’s 30 years old, but he says he’s found a formula to spy on life, 1 = 0, folding games, whatever, but he seems to realize he’s got a problem, so he’s broken a personality, a 30-year-old who lives a normal life with his family, and he’s always switching between mathematicians and ordinary people. I’m sorry.
“Why is that?”
“I don’t know. Who understands the mental world? Maybe it’s all the opposite of what’s happening… In any case, the normal person could not understand that he had a wife and a child, that his wife had sent him in, that he had been good, quiet, that he had never had signs of impatience and hurt, that he was always alone, that he sometimes liked to run, that he could not find him, and that he seemed … eager to disappear. I’m sorry.
“Death to disappear…”
The young nurse frowned and thought about the older nurse, and finally couldn’t understand, and she looked at the patients who went to the yard, and the sun hit them, and it looked so warm and normal.
“What are they thinking? She can’t help but say that.
The older nurse warned her: “Remember never try to communicate with them, because in their minds is another world of chaos that we cannot reach and understand, and if you try to think about them, you will slowly open the door to that world. You know what I mean, sometimes human will is fragile. I’m sorry.
Young nurses know where to nod and move their eyes away.
“Well, go back. I’m sorry.
“Hmm. I’ll call the old man’s family. I’m sorry.
“No need. I’m sorry.
“Why?”
“For more than 30 years, his wife and children never met him once, not once. Before the young nurse was surprised, the older nurse added, “But don’t worry, this is something that everyone knows and it’s common, but they’ve chosen to forget him since the beginning. I’m sorry.
Record number: YX01MVomQG2lg5WB6
Published in 2022-07-05 17:16 Prohibition of Reproduction
Knowledge Oceans
Comments
Darkness and light: deep space, dream and science fiction outside of time
Tang Xinwon, wait!
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
