Three years ago, when I was standing outside the door, I saw Su Zexuan’s back and heard him say, “I never thought I would be with Lan Xin.” The girl in front of
him looked at me with a triumphant smile.
I just know that his white moonlight is not me, everything is just my wishful thinking.
As proud as I am, I escaped from his world.
Three years later, Su Zexuan blocked me in a corner and said with red eyes, “Lan Xin, give me another chance.”
1
“Lan Xin, wait!”
I sighed and stopped walking away.
Turning around and looking at Su Zexuan coming in a hurry, I was once again annoyed to come to this astronomy club party tonight.
If I knew that this was specially organized by Su Zexuan after he returned home, I should not have come.
Although I haven’t seen him for three years, I’m still not ready to face the person I’ve been chasing for a long time, but I can’t.
I stiffly opened the corners of my mouth and said, “Senior, is there anything else?”
“Lan Xin, shall I take you back?” Su Zexuan’s eyes are deep, with a trace of expectation.
I am a little stunned, ten thousand years iceberg will ask to send me, not afraid of his white moonlight-Xu Sitian jealous?
“No, senior. I drove here myself.”
Standing in the darkness, I couldn’t see his expression clearly, but I heard him say,
“Lan Xin, you have changed your WeChat. Can you add me?”
I am really a little surprised, when did Su Zexuan take the initiative to me?
Sure enough, time can change many people and many things.
Just like me, my love and obsession for him have been polished into dissipated clouds by time. After a moment’s
hesitation, I finally nodded. I added friends to
each other, waved goodbye, and turned around and walked to the parking lot. When I
turned to the parking lot, I seemed to see Su Zexuan still standing in place. When I returned to
my small apartment, I remembered the time that had been sealed up for a long time.
In my freshman year, my roommate Ye Mei and I joined the Q Astronomy Club, where we met Su Zexuan, vice president of the Astronomy Club.
The first time I saw him, he was dressed in simple white clothes and black trousers, and his whole body was clear and clean.
Handsome white face, slender tall and straight figure, congealed into a picture in my heart.
At that moment, my heart, which had been quiet for nineteen years, suddenly became restless.
Later, I began to ask the old commune members about Su Zexuan intentionally or unintentionally.
It is said that he has excellent grades and talent, and is recognized as an iceberg school grass.
He has a cold temper, seldom interacts with girls on his own initiative, and is even more indifferent to girls who pursue him.
To my delight, although he is a junior, he is still single. After
several astronomical club activities and contact with him, my heart became more and more restless for him, and I always thought of him from time to time.
I have to admit that I like Su Zexuan.
Ye Mei knew what I was thinking and began to give me advice. She often created opportunities for me to get along with Su Zexuan in the activities of the Astronomical Society.
With her help, I gradually became familiar with Su Zexuan.
I often look for all kinds of opportunities to meet him on campus.
I don’t know if it’s an illusion, but I feel that Su Zexuan is not as cold to me as he is to other girls. After
a stargazing activity, Ye Mei asked him to send me back on the pretext of leaving first, but he didn’t refuse.
Along the way, I was nervous and excited, but he, who had always been cold, took the initiative to chat with me. As soon as
I was not careful, I tripped over the stone steps, and Su Zexuan supported me.
When I stood up straight, I found that my hands were holding his right arm tightly, and his left hand was around me.
We were so close that I could even smell the fresh grass on his body.
I was embarrassed to let go of my hand, but I looked up and saw that his expression was full of concern for me.
I plucked up my courage and looked at him quietly. I couldn’t hide my love in my eyes.
But he avoided my eyes and said simply, “Let’s go.”
I can’t figure out what Su Zexuan is thinking about me. It
was not until he seemed to be jealous of Sun Xu and me that I dared to guess that he was also interested in me.
Sun Xu is Ye Mei’s fellow-townsman and has a good time with us.
This warm man, who Yeh Mei says “looks no worse than Su Tse-hsuan, and has a bright and enthusiastic personality, and is more suitable to be a boyfriend than Su Tse-hsuan,” doesn’t know why he’s not in a hurry to find a girlfriend, but instead revolves around me and Yeh Mei all day.
He has always known that I like Su Zexuan, in my heart, we are pure classmates.
That day, Sun Xu appeared in the library for the first time, sitting beside me all night, and was seen by Su Zexuan. After
that, Su Zexuan’s attitude towards me was obviously cold. He didn’t speak to me
until two weeks later, when I found a chance to be alone with him at an astronomy club event.
“That day,” he said suddenly, with a hint of hesitation in his voice. “Is that your boyfriend?”
“Boyfriend?” I was a little confused. I suddenly remembered that he had met me sitting with Sun Xu. I quickly explained to him,
“No, no, don’t get me wrong. That’s not my boyfriend.”. He is just a fellow villager of Ye Mei, and he is close to us. I don’t have a boyfriend. I explained nervously.
“Oh.” Su Zexuan only replied to me with one word, but the corners of his mouth obviously rose.
This gave me the bold assumption that “he likes me, too.”.
A few weeks later, on Christmas Eve, I decided to make a gesture.
I prepared a gift carefully and made an appointment with Su Zexuan.
I waited downstairs in the library. When I saw him, I suppressed my nervousness and handed him the gift:
“Senior, this is a Christmas gift for you.”
Su Zexuan looked at the gift in my hand, his face showing a complex expression, do not know whether it is surprised or happy.
Seeing that he hadn’t reached out to take it, I was a little worried. “Senior, it’s not valuable. Just take it.”
But in the end he did not accept it. “I’m sorry, Lan Xin,” he said apologetically. “I can’t take it.”
I slowly put down my hand holding the gift and lowered my head slightly, feeling a little sad.
I knew that what he refused was not a gift, but my kindness. Su Zexuan and
I were speechless, but I heard a “Lan Xin.”.
I followed the sound, and it was Sun Xu.
He was walking towards me with some books.
I’m not sure if he heard my conversation with Su Zexuan!
I didn’t know how to react. Sun Xu had already walked up to me and took the gift away from me. In front of Su Zexuan, he said with a smile, “Lan Xin, this gift might as well be given to me.”. He doesn’t want it, but I like it very much.
I was stunned, and it seemed that I was accidentally heard the whole time.
I was a little embarrassed, while Su Zexuan looked unhappy and hesitated to speak.
I suddenly realized that Sun Xu was helping me regain my lost face.
Without waiting for me to answer, Su Zexuan seemed not to want to listen to our conversation any more and turned away silently.
Looking at the background of Su Zexuan’s departure, Sun Xu did not speak, but looked down at the gift box in his hand and stood quietly in front of me, not knowing what he was thinking.
After a while, Sun Xucai raised his head and returned the gift to me. Then he bent the corners of his mouth to comfort me:
“Lan Xin, it’s Su Zexuan who has no vision. Don’t be unhappy.”. Come on, I’ll take you back. After
that day, I was somewhat frustrated and once lost the courage to pursue Su Zexuan.
A month later, on my birthday, I received a birthday gift from Su Zexuan: a pure handmade flower from the other shore.
He must have looked through my circle of friends and knew that I liked the other shore flower.
So what does Su Zexuan mean? Do you like me
or not?
If you don’t like it, why did you find out about my birthday and send me such a thoughtful gift?
If you like it, why did you refuse me that day and never explain it to me? After struggling
secretly for many days, I plucked up my courage and asked him out, intending to find out. The moonlight was just right that
night. I stood under the willow tree by the lake and watched him walking slowly towards me in the moonlight. My heart was out of control!
I looked at him quietly, and he looked back at me gently, and the air was filled with ambiguity.
Before I could talk to him, I heard an angry voice from a girl: “Su Zexuan!”
She is a sweet and lovely girl with shoulder-length hair, two low ponytails and a denim suspender skirt.
She looked at me and then at Su Tse-hsuan. “Who is she, Su Tse-hsuan?” She asked with an unhappy look on her face. I also want to know
this question. Who is
she? What is the relationship with Su Zexuan? Why is she here?
But I know that I am not qualified to ask. Su Zexuan seemed a little surprised at
her sudden appearance.
Under Hsu’s continued questioning, Su Tse-hsuan said lightly,
“Hsu, calm down. She’s just a member of our astronomy club.”
So, Su Zexuan is explaining to her?
So, in Su Zexuan’s eyes, I was just an ordinary member of his astronomy club?
Before that, his kindness to me was only based on the care of the vice president to the members?
If so, my confession tonight is doomed to be a joke.
My heart sank to the bottom of the valley, and my mouth was filled with bitterness, but I nodded politely to Xu Sitian: “Hello, my name is Lan Xin.”
She ignored me and shouted at Su Zexuan, “Why did you meet her here at night?”
Su Zexuan frowned slightly, and his tone was a little impatient: “Xu Sitian, are you..” Seeing that the atmosphere was not right,
I thought that since I had caused him trouble, I should help him explain it.
“I made an appointment with the upperclassman. I had something to do, but it’s all right now.”
Su Zexuan Wen Yan looked at me with deep eyes.
Xu Sitian stood in front of Su Zexuan and blocked his eyes
from looking at me: “It’s all right, isn’t it?”? Then Su Tse-hsuan, take me back to school!
I couldn’t see Su Zexuan’s expression. After a while, I heard him say, “Lan Xin, I’ll go first, and then I’ll get in touch!” After
he finished, without waiting for Xu Sitian’s reaction, he walked to the school gate by himself. Just as
Xu Sitian was about to catch up, he suddenly turned around and took out his cell phone to look at me:
“I’m also from the astronomy club. Then add a WeChat, Lan Xin.”
Not daring to look at the back of their departure, I stood where I was, quietly looking at the lake.
For the first time, I felt that the night in June in Tongcheng could be so cold that my heart was trembling.
Suppressing the surge of emotions in my heart, I walked slowly towards the dormitory, but 15 minutes away, I walked for almost an hour. After
arriving at the dormitory, he unexpectedly received a phone call from Su Zexuan.
It is estimated that after seeing off Xu Sitian, he felt a little sorry for leaving the commune member alone by the lake.
It was the first time he called me on his own initiative, and I was so nervous that my palms were sweating. On the
phone, Su Zexuan apologized and explained to me.
He said Xu Sitian was his neighbor. When I called him
in the afternoon, Xu Sitian happened to be at his house and should have heard it.
He did not know that Xu Sitian would follow him.
Just an old neighbor?
But she is clearly a jealous look today, and the tone of Su Zexuan is so natural and natural.
“Are you on good terms with her?” Since Su Zexuan took the initiative to explain, I must ask a clear question.
“Well, we grew up together.”
It’s his little green plum! The
little green plum can be introduced as an “old neighbor,” and the “member of the astronomy club” is probably just an objective statement, and doesn’t mean anything.
Anyway, Xu Sitian is not his girlfriend, although I think of tonight my heart is still a little sour, but it is not incomprehensible. Maybe this is the way to get along with childhood sweethearts!
Just understand to understand, think of just now he left me to send Xu Sitian back to school, I do not want to say anything.
Hanging up the phone and lying on the bed, I opened Xu Sitian’s circle of friends.
The first message was posted in the afternoon:
“I came here specially from school to celebrate Auntie Chou’s birthday. I wish Auntie Chou 18 years old forever.”
Click on the photo below, there is Su Zexuan on it!
He and Xu Sitian stood on both sides of a dignified middle-aged lady, who had the shadow of Su Zexuan on her face, and should be Su Zexuan’s mother.
So today is Su Zexuan’s mother’s birthday? They went to celebrate his mother together?
What a relationship I envy. Before
I arrived in his world, there was a girl who grew up with him all the way, and even knew each other’s parents so well.
They have participated in each other’s life for more than ten years, and they may have spent many storms in their growth together, not to mention just sending them back to school.
I admit that I am jealous, and no one will comfort me. I
didn’t want to continue looking for abuse, so I pressed the off button hard. I don’t
think I am a person who is willing to pursue love regardless of the consequences.
On the contrary, I am cautious and timid about love, like a squirrel looking for fruit, and the slightest sign of trouble can scare me back into my hole. The existence of
small green plum, let me silently back to the starting point of unrequited love.
Later, Xu Sitian’s circle of friends almost became a window for me to understand Su Zexuan’s dynamics:
his cat was fat again;
he passed the TOEFL test smoothly;
he went to the architectural design Institute for internship;
he..
Every time I see a message from Xu Sitian about him, my heart is very sour.
But I still don’t want to block Xu Sitian, because I want to know his recent situation.
In his senior year, he finished his internship and returned to school. From time to time,
we would meet in the library, occasionally chat a few words, and when it was convenient, he would send me back to the dormitory.
I know that he is also preparing to study abroad. I’m
a little sad. I haven’t declared my love for him yet. If he travels across the ocean, will I still have a chance? We were stuck in the library
one night when it suddenly began to rain.
He borrowed an umbrella from somewhere and sent me back to the dormitory. Outside the
umbrella is a chaotic world of heavy rain, and under the umbrella is the world that makes me feel at ease.
Approaching the dormitory downstairs, I found that he had been tilting the umbrella to my side, half of his body was exposed outside the umbrella, and all of them were wet.
At that moment, love is intertwined with touching, and I just want to go all the way with the person beside me. When I got
to the dormitory downstairs, I finally made a decision.
I stopped, turned to face him, and said to him, “I like you, senior.”
He was a little surprised, with joy between his eyebrows and eyes, followed by entanglement and hesitation.
He just said softly, “I know, Lan Xin.”
And then there was no then.
I was a little nervous and looked at him closely. “Do you like me, senior?” I asked.
He looked at me tenderly.
From his eyes, I clearly read his heart for me.
But he lowered his head and kept silent until he sent me back to the dormitory downstairs, and I didn’t get the answer I wanted.
I was a little depressed, and before I knew what Su Zexuan meant, I heard that he was ill. After sending me back
that rainy night, he took the umbrella back to the library and returned it to his classmates. Finally, he went back to the dormitory in the rain.
I am very distressed. After class
that day, I brought some fruits and stepped into the boys’ dormitory for the first time. The door of
his dormitory is open, someone is talking, it is Xu Sitian! Why is
she in Su Zexuan’s dormitory?
Xu Sitian stood face to face with Su Zexuan in the direction of the dormitory door.
When she saw me suddenly appearing outside the door, there was a flash of surprise in her eyes. Then I heard her ask Su Zexuan,
“So, do you like Lan Xin?”
I was stunned and stopped outside the door.
Su Zexuan obviously didn’t know I was behind him. He seemed to hesitate for a moment and said,
“I never thought I would be with Lan Xin.” The girl in front of
him looked at me with a triumphant smile.
I held the bag in my hand tightly, afraid that it would fall because of my sudden sense of powerlessness.
“So your choice has always been me, right?”
Xu Sitian finished, went straight forward and hugged him.
I know Xu Sitian did it on purpose.
That night, she knew I liked Su Zexuan.
She added my WeChat just to show me how intimate her relationship with Su Zexuan was, so that I could retreat.
At this moment, she still intentionally, with the most cruel way to tell me that Su Zexuan likes her, not me.
I finally know that his white moonlight has never been me, more than a year of love is just my wishful thinking.
I ran away from his dormitory with the “warmth” he didn’t need at all.
I fled, with my pride, from his world.
I never knew that the lovelorn of unrequited love could be so painful.
I blacklisted all the contact information of him and Xu Sitian and quit the club.
Blocked all Su Zexuan’s information.
Later, I heard that Xu Sitian and Su Zexuan went abroad together.
On the night I heard the news, I cried like a child in Ye Mei’s arms.
They are lovers and they will get married.
And I, in this love story, have the script of the female partner at the beginning, but I never know it.
In my painful days, Sun Xu and Ye Mei accompanied me, running at night, climbing mountains and have a barbecue after study, helping me step by step to get out of the emotional injury.
Later, Ye Mei found his Mr. Right, while Sun Xu and I became the singles front alliance, the best actors to persuade each other to quit their suitors. In
those two years, Sun Xu gave me meticulous care and warmth.
Several rainy days, he also held an umbrella, looking at the umbrella tilted to my side and his wet arms, I know that love is not the only thing that can give such intimate care.
Time is a good medicine. It’s been
three years, and I’ve already put it down. I
just didn’t expect that he would appear in front of me again and become active for no reason.
12
ended the long memory, somehow, I actually miss Sun Xu that guy. I haven’t seen
him for two months! After
graduation, Sun Xu was arrested to inherit the family business, and we knew that he was a rich second generation.
His father did not let him work in the group company in Tongcheng, and sent him to work as a supervisor at the construction site in other provinces, which is said to require him to start from the bottom.
For nearly a year, he often chatted with me at the WeChat to amuse me.
But he was so busy that he could only come back on some important days. Of course, he never forgot to bring gifts to me and Ye Mei.
Ye Mei asked me many times in private, Sun Xu has not been looking for a girlfriend for so many years, has been so good to me, do you like me?
In fact, I have no doubts.
I once asked him tentatively, “You’re such a nice guy, don’t you really think about having a girlfriend?”
He looked at me quietly and asked me, “Can you forget Su Zexuan?”
I am somewhat inexplicable, do not understand what the question I asked has to do with Su Zexuan?
But at that time I was not completely relieved of Su Zexuan, listening to his sudden mention, the mood is still somewhat lost.
He should have read my meaning from my gloomy look.
Then he smiled bitterly and said in a low voice, “So do I.”. There’s someone in your heart that you can’t easily forget.
I knew at once.
It turned out that he, like me, had a man in his heart who could not get what he wanted.
Maybe it’s because he and I have the same situation and play well with each other, so he takes extra care of me!
I was still wandering in my memory when I received a phone call from Ye Mei.
She told me that after I left the party just now, she chatted with Su Zexuan and learned that Su Zexuan had not achieved success with Xu Sitian and was currently single.
Then Ye Mei asked me carefully what I thought?
Perhaps she is to see my many suitors, but has been single, think I just put down the mouth, in fact, Su Zexuan is still in love with it! “It’s none of my business whether he’s single or married,”
I said with a helpless smile.
Is it just an old love, waiting to be sour and smelly in your heart?
I forgot it long ago!
Ye Mei seemed relieved when she heard this.
Finally, she told me in a relaxed tone that she had just learned that Sun Xu would return to Tongcheng in the near future.
Somehow, my mood, which had been dull all night, suddenly brightened up. After
adding Su Zexuan’s WeChat, he occasionally sent me greetings and asked me if I was free several times. I don’t care whether
he simply wants to catch up with a school girl he hasn’t seen for three years, or whether he wants to “settle for second best” because he broke up with Hsu Ssu-tien.
Because I have no intention of turning back, I don’t want to have too much contact with him, so I always reply lightly and refuse politely. Unexpectedly
, a few days later, I met him in the corridor at the entrance of the company.
He stood leaning against the wall with a long leg, his left hand in his pocket, his right hand brushing his mobile phone, tall and handsome posture and handsome side face, so that many female colleagues passing by after work could not help peeking back.
He still looks like that, and he used to make my heart beat and my eyes moved.
But now that I see him again, my heart has long lost the waves of the past.
Su Zexuan looked up and saw me, with joy in his eyes, and then walked straight towards me.
He said he came to see me specially and wanted to invite me to dinner.
I was a little surprised, but I refused him.
Because when facing him, I always think of that sad time unconsciously, and I really have some resistance.
“Lan Xin, I have something to say to you.” Su Zexuan is a little anxious, with a plea in his eyes.
Never seen such Su Zexuan, in the memory of the cold, when will he be so humble to girls?
I couldn’t bear it and finally nodded.
In fact, once he just didn’t like me, and he didn’t do anything wrong.
I needn’t have been so indifferent to him.
Walking to the fountain in the square, Su Zexuan stopped and looked straight at me.
Lan Xin, I want to tell you: I like you! Three years ago you asked me if I liked you. Is it too late for me to give you an answer now?
Su Zexuan’s sudden confession made me feel at a loss.
Lan Xin, all these years abroad, I have always regretted that I did not dare to face up to my heart at the beginning. I came back for you, but I heard that you were with Sun Xu. I didn’t know it was a misunderstanding until I returned home not long ago. I’m really glad to know that you haven’t had a boyfriend for three years. So, do I still have a chance?
I almost laughed in anger.
Did Su Zexuan think that I was single all the way because I was obsessed with him?
I’m not.
I didn’t.
I just prefer lack to abuse. I
was just frustrated when I fell in love for the first time, so I was more cautious about love.
Besides, didn’t he like me at the beginning?
Didn’t you say you didn’t want to be with me?
His love choice has always been Xu Sitian, hasn’t it? Is it
difficult for him to break up with Hsu Ssu-tien and “settle for the second best” to come to me?
If so, Su Zexuan’s love is too cheap. Holding back my displeasure,
I said
, “Senior, I actually knew the answer three years ago.”. At that time, I accidentally heard the conversation between you and Xu Sitian. You said you never wanted to be with me. Your choice was always Xu Sitian. From then on, I knew you didn’t like me, and everything was just my wishful thinking. So, I gave up liking you long ago. It’s been so long, and I don’t understand why you’re suddenly saying this now.
Su Zexuan seemed a little surprised. I heard his conversation with Xu Sitian and explained nervously:
I like you. I liked you a long time ago, but I dare not admit it. I have never liked Xu Sitian. But for some reason, I did want to accept her at the beginning, but in the end I couldn’t convince myself to be with her. When I saw you that day, I didn’t think I could put you down. I couldn’t help it, so I came to you. I really don’t want to miss you again.
I do not understand, once let me feel that he is just wishful thinking of Su Zexuan, why suddenly show affection to me?
If Su Zexuan really liked me at the beginning, how could he not give me a response, refuse my gift, ignore my confession, and say such words as “never thought of being with Lan Xin”.
I can’t believe what he says he likes.
Even if he did not choose Xu Sitian in the end, he did prefer her to me on the scales of Xu Sitian.
There’s really no need to get entangled any more! Whether
he likes me or not is no longer important. Things have passed for so long, and even the most intense emotions have calmed down. There is no need to get to the bottom of it. Isn’t it better to maintain each other’s dignity?
Senior, let bygones be bygones. I’ve forgotten all about it, and so have you.
I didn’t want to continue the communication and ended the meeting hastily. On the way
back, I lost my mind for no reason.
After all, Su Zexuan’s confession was what I longed for in those years.
At the beginning, I explored every look and action he gave me, always trying to find evidence of his heart.
His aloof attitude and seemingly absent love often make me sleepless. Today,
three years later, after I had put it down, he suddenly said he liked me.
Even though I refused to believe it, his straightforward and warm words still lingered in my mind for a long time.
When I got to the door, I saw Sun Xu standing outside my house.
I was so surprise that all my confused thought suddenly disappeared.
It turned out that Sun Xu had just arrived in Tongcheng and came to me as soon as he got off the plane.
But I haven’t come home yet, and I can’t get through the phone, so he has to stay at the door of my house.
I took out my cell phone, and it was out of power.
Although every time Sun Xu came back, he would make an appointment with me for dinner, it was the first time that he rushed to find me as soon as he got off the plane.
I thought so, so I asked.
But he did not answer, saying only that he had convinced his father that he would not leave when he came back this time. I was very happy when I heard
this.
Throughout the night, I clearly felt that Sun Xu had something on his mind and hesitated to speak several times.
Until he left, he did not say it.
Soon after, Ye Mei’s wedding arrived.
She married Li Min, who is also a member of the University Astronomy Club.
The two got together in their sophomore year, and after four years of long-distance love, they decided to join hands in the next stage of life.
As Ye Mei’s best friend, I naturally can’t escape being a bridesmaid for her.
Sun Xu and Su Zexuan were also invited to attend the wedding. On the night of the
wedding, I stood beside Ye Mei, wearing a crooked fishbone braid and a strapless dress, and accompanied her to greet guests at the door.
Sun Xu arrived early and was busy with Ye Mei and me. When
Su Zexuan arrived, Sun Xu was bringing me a bottle of water and asked me to drink a few mouthfuls. After congratulating Li Min and Ye Mei,
Su Zexuan came to me and looked at me deeply, as if there were thousands of words in his eyes.
I didn’t know how to react for a moment. Seeing this,
Sun Xu took the water from my hand and broke my embarrassment. After the
wedding banquet began, as a bridesmaid, I had to block the wine for Ye Mei.
I was too drunk, but Sun Xu prepared drinks for me early, and from time to time he confused the real with the fake. When I
got to Su Zexuan’s table, my classmates asked me to drink again.
Su Zexuan did not know that I occasionally used drinks instead of wine, only when I had drunk a lot.
He frowned slightly, unable to hold back, and stood up with a glass of wine in his hand.
“Lan Xin has drunk a little too much. If I can, I’ll drink for her.” We were stunned by
his sudden act of defense.
I clearly saw Sun Xu not far away, looked over and frowned slightly.
“It doesn’t matter.” I refused him and drank the wine in my hand.
Finally accompanied Ye Mei to finish a circle of wine, returned to the seat only to feel some stomach discomfort, I raised my hand gently rubbed. After the banquet started
tonight, I toasted without eating a few mouthfuls of food, and my stomach was not very comfortable.
Sun Xu should be found out, and soon brought me a porridge, saying that he went to the kitchen to find the chef.
I felt warm in my heart and praised him with a smile that he was really a close person. Disturb the bridal chamber after the
wedding banquet, and I’m worried about being tricked.
Sun Xu knew my concerns and said he was there so I didn’t have to worry. I
really feel relieved when I hear this.
The best man is Li Min’s colleague. He is sunny and handsome, and he knows me after one night.
He and I were heckled to eat an apple hanging on a rope, and we were not allowed to do anything, we had to rely on our mouths.
In fact, the apple is not small, one person will not bite one side too close. It was just that the person carrying the apple, with the intention of playing a trick, lifted the apple up when I was about to bite it. Fortunately, I stopped in a hurry.
I was a little unhappy, and Sun Xu was about to break out when he saw Su Zexuan take the apple from the man’s hand. His face
was livid and he looked extremely upset.
He held the apple firmly, and the best man and I ate the apple quickly, ending the teasing.
After that, someone came up with a new trick, let me sit on the back of the best man, and the best man had to carry me to do ten push-ups. The dress
I was wearing was a little short, and when I was hesitating about how to sit down without exposure, Sun Xu had taken off his coat and handed it to me.
When the best man was ready, I was about to sit down, but Su Zexuan did not know where to find a cushion.
Then he put the cushion on the best man’s back!
I I breathed a sigh of relief when the
wedding ceremony was finally over.
I saw Su Zexuan locked his eyebrows for most of the day and finally stretched out. After the
wedding banquet, I refused Su Zexuan’s offer to send me, and I went home by Sun Xu’s car. After
washing and combing, I lay quietly in bed, my body was very tired but I couldn’t sleep. Su Zexuan’s actions have been surging in my mind
tonight.
After a while, there was a knock at the door.
Open the door, unexpectedly is Su Zexuan.
He seemed a little drunk, and there was a strong smell of alcohol on his body.
I was still in the doorway, Su Zexuan had already held my shoulders in both hands and pushed me into the room, pushing me against the wall.
I felt nervous: “Senior!”
“Lan Xin.” He looked straight at me, his eyes red. “You made me forget about you. I don’t think I can.”
Su Zexuan’s voice was deep: “Do you know how uncomfortable I am to see you standing on the stage with other men tonight, toasting and playing games together?”? I can’t imagine what will happen to me if you really become someone else’s bride. I really can’t live without you.
He seemed to have reached the limit of forbearance. His eyes were red. He took a step forward and put his hands on the walls on both sides of me.
“Lan Xin, can you give me another chance?”? This time, it’s my turn to chase you.
I was trapped by his wall, and his close distance made me a little cramped:
“Senior, I admit that I really liked you once.”. At the beginning, even if I knew that you and Xu Sitian were very close, I convinced myself to understand the friendship you grew up together. But when I heard you say that you never wanted to accept me, when I saw Xu Sitian embrace you, my heart died. In the past three years, I have put you down with great efforts. And don’t cling to it any more.
Su Zexuan was silent, his eyes sad. After
a long time, he turned away with a heavy step.
A few days later, I met Xu Sitian downstairs in the company.
She said she was asked to come to me on purpose.
That evening, she invited me to a coffee shop and revealed the past that I didn’t know.
Su Zexuan is a single-parent family, and his father had an accident when he was two years old.
At that time, their teahouse had just started, and his mother, Aunt Zhou, had to take Su Zexuan alone and be busy with the teahouse.
At that time, Xu Sitian’s family lived in the same courtyard with them. Every time Aunt Zhou was busy with the teahouse, she would deposit Su Zexuan in Xu Sitian’s home.
Xu Sitian’s parents love Su Zexuan very much and often help Aunt Zhou take care of him. When
Su Zexuan was young, he spent even more time in their home than in his own.
Therefore, Su Zexuan has always been very grateful to Xu Sitian’s parents. After
they went to college, Xu Sitian’s parents saw that Xu Sitian liked Su Zexuan, and felt that Su Zexuan also took care of Xu Sitian, so they proposed to Su Zexuan’s mother that they could try together.
Su Zexuan did not explicitly agree, but did not object.
Xu Sitian thought that he had acquiesced.
She felt that they would naturally become lovers and husband and wife in the future.
But after knowing me in junior year, Su Zexuan began to change a little.
Although he did not deliberately pull away from Xu Sitian, he clearly had some resistance.
She knew that Su Zexuan did not want to hurt her because she was grateful, so she would still abide by the agreement of her elders.
So that day, she deliberately guided Su Zexuan to say that, deliberately hugged her, to cut off my expectations of him.
As it turned out, she succeeded.
But after they went abroad to study together, Xu Sitian wanted to go further with him and develop into a lover’s relationship, but Su Zexuan never accepted it.
Only then did Xu Sitian know that Su Zexuan really liked me and could no longer force himself. The farther away he is
from you, the more clearly he seems to like you. He turned me down, confessed to his family, and then distanced himself from me. I don’t want to do this. Su Zexuan is not only the first person I like, but also the family I grew up with. In the past few years, I have figured it out. If he doesn’t like me and keeps him around, we won’t be happy. Now I have left him and started a new life.
Not long ago, I learned about the problems between you. I think there are some things he won’t say, so let me tell you the truth.
Lan Xin, is it possible for you to try to give Ze Xuan another chance? After all, you are the only person Su Tse-hsuan has liked over the years! After
listening to Xu Sitian’s words, it is impossible for the mood to have no ups and downs.
I finally know, Su Zexuan at the beginning of the cold, now warm because of what?
I also finally believe that Su Zexuan really had a heart and liked me.
It’s just that it’s a little late for him to decide to face the love in his heart.
With the passage of time, the injury at that time was true, and the pain at that time was also true.
I’m not sure if I should give him another chance to regain his fate with him? On the third day after
Xu Sitian looked for me, I ran downstairs at night and met Su Zexuan unexpectedly.
He told me that he moved to my neighborhood to be closer to me.
I felt helpless, and I tossed hundreds of words in my mind to persuade me to quit, but I didn’t say them in the end. After
moving to our community, Su Zexuan always appeared in front of me from time to time. Sometimes
he would wait by my car with two breakfasts in the morning, sometimes he would knock on my door after work to bring me food, and sometimes he would wait downstairs for me to run at night on weekends. After
knowing each other for so long, I didn’t know that Su Zexuan was chasing people like this.
I thought it was the three years abroad that changed him, but several times I saw him face the girl he accosted, but he still looked so cold. One
night, there was a sudden rainstorm in Tongcheng, and the water downstairs of the apartment was very deep.
He came to my house to get my car keys and helped me move the car to a higher ground. When he
came back, as usual, he did not enter the door, but handed me the car keys and left.
I saw him in the cool cold wind, wet all over, hair dripping with rain, thinking of the night when he sent me back to the dormitory with an umbrella that year, I felt a little sad. On the
weekend, Sun Xu came to pick me up for dinner and met Su Zexuan downstairs.
When he knew that Su Zexuan had moved to our neighborhood, he seemed a little upset.
This evening, Sun Xu’s words were much less than usual.
After dinner, Sun Xu sent me back to the apartment.
Downstairs, I waved goodbye to him and saw him get out of the car.
“Lan Xin, let’s take a walk in the neighborhood!”
I think Sun Xu probably ate too much and wanted to digest, so he nodded.
Sun Xu and I walked slowly in the night without saying a word for a long time. I was not used to his quietness and asked him,
Sun Xu, what’s wrong with you today? Is there anything going wrong at work?
Sun Xu turned to the path where there were fewer people. He stopped and looked at me, as if hesitating for a long time before blurting out,
“Lan Xin, Su Zexuan came back and turned around to chase you.”. Will you..?
I didn’t expect him to ask this, but it’s not surprising that he always knew about me and Su Zexuan.
Sun Hsu, it wasn’t long ago that I learned why he turned me down. I don’t accept him now, and I don’t know about the future.
Although Sun Xu tonight is not as indifferent as usual, but a little serious, but I did not think much about it, or unreservedly tell the truth to Sun Xu.
Sun Xu was quiet for a long time, and then I heard him say,
“So you haven’t thought about me for so many years?”
I froze in the same place and didn’t know why.
All these years, I have been playing the role of a good friend around you. Can’t you see that I actually like you? I’m waiting for you, waiting for you to put down Su Zexuan, waiting for you to empty your heart and ask you for a chance to be together.
I like you so much. I am afraid that if I speak my mind, you will alienate me as you alienate other suitors.
So I always test carefully and wait patiently. But now I don’t think I can wait any longer.
“Lan Xin, can you try to think about me?”
I think of what Sun Xu has done for me over the years.
So gentle and lasting companionship, so meticulous and thoughtful care, I actually believe that it is only friendship. How stupid am
I to ignore the deep feeling in his eyes from time to time for so many years?
I have always regarded him as my best friend, and I have never thought of him and myself as a man and a woman.
And now I and Su Zexuan cut constantly and disorderly, still do not know where to go next.
Sun Xu’s sudden confession at this time made me even more flustered, and I didn’t know how to respond for a moment.
I saw Sun Xu’s eyes with expectations, so heavy that my breath seemed anxious.
I have been hurt by love.
I know that giving meaningless hope is more hurtful than refusing in the first place. Before
I think clearly, I can’t give Sun Xu any promise.
“Sun Xu, I’m sorry.” I don’t know what to say but to apologize.
I saw the light go out of his eyes.
He seems to have misunderstood that I refused him.
Do you remember the first gift I gave you? The crystal and glass music box. Of course,
I remember that it was a crystal glass music box, inside which was a cartoon girl in a light blue skirt with long hair and waist. When she wound up, the girl in the music box was accompanied by melodious music, spinning in the flying snowflakes. I
look at it and I remember the first time I saw you. It was the first public class in our department, and you were wearing a long skirt and long hair, and you walked in front of me. At that moment, I knew that the word “love at first sight” was true.
So, Sun Xu fell in love with me so early?
Over the years, he accompanied me, watching me like others, watching me hurt for others, in the name of a good friend, accompanied me through one journey after another, how sad my heart should be.
I felt a little distressed and tears fell from my face.
Sun Xu gently wiped away my tears: “Lan Xin, don’t cry.”. It doesn’t matter. In fact, I haven’t thought about this result all these years. I’ve been prepared for it! Do you remember what I asked you the night before I left Tongcheng the year I graduated?
I remember.
At that time, he was sent to other cities by his father. Before leaving Tongcheng, we saw him off at the bar. When I
was slightly drunk, he asked me if I was still thinking about Su Zexuan.
I said I can’t even remember who he is.
Sun Xu was very happy and asked me jokingly if I should consider being with him? I
don’t know why I suddenly felt a little nervous. Although I only thought he was talking nonsense after drinking, I was still a little angry and asked him not to make jokes.
I told you to consider staying with me, and you got angry. At that time, I thought, maybe I will never get into your heart. So, I dare not confess. But when I heard that Su Zexuan had come back, I rushed back to Tongcheng regardless. I think I should try, at least let you know, although I don’t think I have a chance, but..
Sun Xu this big fool, this recognized that I will choose Su Zexuan?
Seeing that my eyes were still misty with tears, Sun Xu tried to raise the corners of his mouth and put on his usual cynical smiling face to amuse me:
“Lan Xin, you really don’t know the goods. I’m such a handsome, rich and single-minded man. I don’t know how many girls are waiting in line for me to like it!”! In the future, don’t cry on my back and ask me to like you again. Instead of laughing,
my heart tightened and I grabbed the corner of his coat.
From Sun Xu’s eyes, I finally understood the deep feeling of sadness.
“Let’s go. I’ll take you back.” Downstairs in
the apartment, before I entered, he gently grabbed me, carefully stroked my face with both hands, and imprinted a gentle kiss on my forehead.
He may want to put an end to his love.
But what he didn’t know was that my heart was suddenly beating faster and even my neck was burning.
I always thought I was just seeing him as a buddy, but when he kissed me, I actually had a chemical reaction to him.
I told Ye Mei about Su Zexuan and Sun Xu.
It turned out that Ye Mei had long known that Sun Xu liked me, and she told Sun Xu the news of Su Zexuan’s return not long ago. Therefore, Sun Xu would rush back to Tongcheng. After
knowing that I had feelings for Sun Xu, she was very gratified and felt that Sun Xu’s pursuit of love had finally seen the dawn.
In the face of my confused feelings, I chose to escape.
It happened that the Sioux City Branch needed personnel support for half a year, so I applied for a transfer on my own initiative. I like this city
very much, but I am far away from my friends and family, and occasionally I am a little lonely.
Fortunately, Ye Mei often contacted me and told me some people and things in Tongcheng.
It is said that after Sun Xu returned to the group company, he had a headache because of the spoiled daughter of a director, and the girl looked good and had a good figure. After hearing this, I felt a little uncomfortable in my heart. I had a breath in my chest and couldn’t get down. In the six months since I
went to Sioux City, I often think of Sun Xu’s kiss on my forehead that night, and of my unexpected blush and heartbeat later.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
These years I have not seen the right person, I thought it was because I had not put down Su Zexuan, but never thought it was because Sun Xu had unconsciously sneaked into my heart.
Otherwise why Su Zexuan came back, even if he said he liked me and pursued me, I was not tempted. But Sun Xu’s kiss has been on my mind for so long.
Occasionally, on my way back from the company to my temporary residence, I seem to see his figure. I
must be wrong. The two cities are more than two hundred kilometers apart. How could he appear here for no reason. One morning, a few months after I
came to Sioux City, I suddenly had a fever. Lying in bed in a daze,
I felt for the first time the helplessness of “being a stranger alone in a foreign land.” I couldn’t help but send a message to my circle of friends.
Twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang.
Opening the door, it was Sun Xu who stood outside the door.
How is that possible? I looked shocked.
“I saw your circle of friends, and I knew you were sick, so I bought some medicine and food.”
But how could it be so fast? So the figure I saw before was him?
Because I said I needed time to think about it, so he came to Tongcheng to see me, but he didn’t dare to appear in front of me?
This is a hotel apartment, except for the bathroom and balcony, all the functional areas are in the same space, and the small place is even more crowded because of Sun Xu’s arrival.
In the past, I never felt anything wrong with Sun Xu alone, but this time I was a little nervous.
I went into the bathroom to wash, and when I came out, I saw a bowl of porridge from a certain porridge shop on the bar, beside which there were several boxes of medicine.
Sun Xu came over, raised his hand gently, and probed the temperature on my forehead.
He is no different from the past, but my heart can no longer be as calm as before.
His deep magnetic voice, the faint fragrance of vegetation on his body, warm and soft hands. All turn into a piece of feather, gently scratch in my heart.
In his concerned eyes, I finished most of the bowl of porridge.
Then he helped me get the medicine and poured me a glass of water.
I took the medicine obediently and looked at him in a daze.
His eyelashes are so long. Why haven’t you found them all these years?
He noticed my eyes, suddenly narrowed his eyes, smiled softly, and the corners of his mouth curved into a beautiful arc.
My face suddenly turned red and I tried to cover it up.
Quiet for a while, I think of that rich and beautiful young lady, a sour feeling welled up in my heart.
“If you come to me, won’t the daughter of your director, the rich and beautiful young lady, be angry?”
Who? Which young lady? You mean Xu Ruirui? “How do I know her name?”
I said, pouting. What does it matter to me whether
she is angry or not? I don’t like her. Sun Xu said as he helped me throw the takeout box into the trash can.
Suddenly he turned around and said tentatively, “Lan Xin, are you jealous?”
I immediately said no: “No, I didn’t.” Smiling,
Sun Xu drew out his voice and said, “Oh, no!” “I don’t believe it,” was clearly written in
his eyes.
Later, I learned that Ye Mei had told him that I had feelings for him.
That’s why he has confidence and courage.
The medicine may have a hypnotic effect. I’m a little sleepy.
Pulling me to lie down on the bed, Sun Xu helped me tuck in the corner of the quilt and sat quietly watching me.
I was a little shy, but I didn’t look away, looking at the face that had been hovering in my mind all this time.
Over the years, he has always been there for me when I need care and care.
At that time, when I had a stomachache during my period, he skipped classes and went to the snack bar outside to boil brown sugar ginger water for me. Then he filled it in a thermos pot and asked Ye Mei to bring it to me.
When I was in a bad mood, he always accompanied me on the track and field, walking round and round;
Every time he accompanies us to climb the mountain, he always takes care of all my bags and prepares all kinds of snacks I like.
It is such a person who has been with me for more than three years and refused one girl after another who showed kindness to him.
This cunning man surrounded me with a gentle net and let me fall unconsciously.
By the time I found out, I couldn’t get away. But
now I find that I don’t want to run away.
Sun Xu accompanied me for a whole day and returned to Tongcheng in the evening. Before he
left, he did not forget to tell me,
“Drink plenty of water and put on more clothes in the morning and evening.”. Take care of yourself and don’t get sick again. Call me if you need anything, and I’ll be right back.
Holding back his words, I waved goodbye to him. After
Sun Xu left, I felt the house suddenly empty.
I can’t bear to part with him so much. Fortunately, I will go back to Tongcheng soon.
Back in Tongcheng, Sun Xu came to pick me up. Downstairs
in the apartment, I met Su Zexuan, whom I hadn’t seen for half a year. In
the past six months, he often sent me messages about the dribs and drabs of life.
He has tried very hard to show his love to me. Just
like I used to do to him.
It’s just that now I can’t give him the response he wants.
In those years, he brought me such a long pain. In Sun Xu’s gentle company,
my heart has been melted by the warm sun unconsciously. How can I yearn for the coldness of the iceberg.
I nodded with him and pulled Sun Xu away.
Entering the apartment door, Sun Xu was a little unhappy.
I guess he saw Su Zexuan, maybe he was worried that I would be abducted by Su Zexuan. After struggling for a long time,
he finally asked, “Lan Xin, can you not live here?” Where
am I going to live? And I have no other house.
I have. One bedroom, one living room, downtown, for you?
“Do I live alone?” I looked at him with a smile.
Sun Xu was a little confused, so he looked at my smiling eyes and suddenly reacted.
“So you, and I, live together?” Sun Xu said tentatively.
I looked at him with a smile and nodded a little shyly. The expression on
Sun Xu’s face slowly changed from shock to surprise, and he picked me up.
I put my arms around his neck and looked up at him. I was alone in his eyes.
He put me down, lowered his head slowly, and kissed me gently on the lips.
I don’t know how long the kiss lasted before Sun Xu stopped: I’ve really been looking forward to
this kiss for many years. I love you, Lan Xin!
“Sun Hsu, I love you too.” And thank you for being with me for so many years.
That night, the stars outside the window are swaying, the fragrance of flowers in the room is flowing, and we are melting each other in the waves of flowers.
The next day, Sun Xu asked for leave directly, helped me pack my luggage, let me move to his place tonight, and did not want me to live in the apartment building where Su Zexuan would appear at any time. After
packing up, Sun Xu took my hand and walked out of the door.
Outside the door stood Su Zexuan, who seemed to have not slept all night.
He looked at Sun Xu holding my hand and should have understood something. With red eyes,
he said in a hoarse voice, “Lan Xin, you’re with Sun Xu.”
I nodded.
Senior, I believe you are sincere to me. But I think, we still have fate after all! May you find your own happiness soon.
Looking at Su Zexuan’s sad appearance, I feel a little uncomfortable.
Sun Xu suddenly clenched my hand.
I looked up at the man who had patiently carved a mark in my heart with his loving heart in the long years, and the ups and downs of his emotions were instantly soothed, and the corners of his mouth could not restrain the curvature of happiness.
And he, just like every time he looked at me all these years, gave me a smile full of love.
Later, Sun Xu asked me why I chose him?
I put my arm around his shoulder and smiled.
“The answer to this question is very long. It’s hidden in the time you spent with me.”
“Maybe it’s because you never want to make me sad, and you always regard my happiness as the most important thing.”
“Maybe you put me in your heart so carefully that you don’t want me to notice, but you still reveal it inadvertently.”
“Perhaps I have finally discovered that the days with you by my side are the beautiful sunny days of the warm sun.”
“So, Sun Hsu, holding your hand and walking with you should be the best choice in my life!”
(End of the full text)
Record No.: YXX14RRzv4sYYYJb8NiMmJy Silent love above the
white clouds: I just like you
, Shen Jiangzhu Moon, etc
. ×
