I can’t even control the crazy ideas in my head.
His lips were so close, his hormonals were like hooks, strangling every desire in my cell.
He grabbed me in the arm and put me on the wall and the kiss was about to fall.
The following is a fictional story to show you the colourful life of a married couple.
One.
Someone in this world must be married to love, for example, my best friend, Nguyen Liang. Someone must have missed the love of life, for example, me.
The thing I admire and envy most is that she’s been in love many times, and every time she breaks up, she cries and says she won’t love again, but next time she does her best.
She has always said that life is short and that she wants to enjoy her life in time, and that she aspires to a life full of noise. I thought she’d been in love all her life. I didn’t think she’d settle down someday.
At this point in the wedding, she was wearing a white wedding dress, and she fell into the honey and laughed like a child.
She took the groom’s hand and said, “I thought I’d spend my whole life chasing after true love that I didn’t know existed, and I thought I’d spend my whole life alone until I met you. You satisfy all my fantasies about love, you make me want to settle down; only with you can home be called home. I’m sorry.
The memory of the heart is ticked.
I thought of Song Xianja, and I didn’t know how he was on the other side of the ocean. I looked down at my toes, and I had black shoes close.
It’s a pair of shoes with no tattoos and no decorations, but it’s very comfortable and stylish. Like Mr. Liang himself.
Mr. Leung held my hand and whispered in my ear, “Are you jealous? We can also have the wedding if you want. I’m sorry.
I was in a hurry to shake my head, “No need. I’m sorry.
Why are you so desperate to say no?
“The couple holding hands! Yes! It’s you. The bride calls for the best sister to play. I’m sorry.
I looked at Liang Nguyen with anger, and she knew that I was afraid to stand in front of people from an early age and that the eyes of others would make me nervous.
Liang Nguyen waved on the stage, and all the guests looked at me, and even the lights hit me in the face. It’s over. But it’s hard to stand up. Mr. Liang smiled very nicely, and he was busy today with a lot of activities to accompany me. Good thing he held my hand, gave me a little bottom.
There are other guests involved in the game, and the game is simple, drumming flowers, and the lost couple randomly picks a question.
I couldn’t answer a single question from the previous couple who answered “the most romantic moments of love”, “what do they love most about each other” and “Why do they feel like The One?”
Every time the music rings, my heart jumps into my throat and throws flowers out like it had to fly. But Mr. Leung, the elderly, is always slow, and I want to run away as soon as the music stops and the bouquet stays in his hand.
The host took a question and said, “When is the hottest moment of your love?” I’m sorry.
That’s bullshit. I’ve been with only two of Mr. Leung’s wounded. It cannot be said that since there has been more grief than death, it would be better to try once again.
I licked my lips. Mr. Liang said that every time I was nervous, I put my tongue between my upper and lower lips, especially like little animals.
I was just about to say that Mr. Liang had to kiss him. While it is legitimate to be kissed by my own husband, I have never been very good at delivering dog food and, in the eyes of the public, the blood has washed from the soles of my feet to the back of my head.
When I was still in a coma, Mr. Leung answered the microphone, “Our love is always on fire. I’m sorry.
The wedding scene boiled, and many girls made envious boobs and turned their eyes on the boys.
Liang was happy to have a smile on the bridegroom, as if she had raised her daughter for over a decade.
I just wanted to find a place to sew and move, and I suddenly saw Song Xianja. I thought he’d never come back.
Song Qiancheng leaned on the wedding entrance and smiled. He looked at me like he was transferred to our class in the first three years, and he looked at me like a wolf looking at a rabbit.
I left in a panic.
Two.
After leaving the wedding, Mr. Leung and I drove to the water market. Mr. Liang should have paid well, and the mountain tasted more than usual.
To thank Mr. Liang for his improvisation, I bungled his favorite mushang.
Let’s pour a little vinegar before we get out of the pot. Mr. Leung ate two bowls of rice. Sometimes I wonder if Mr. Leung is really a very well-nourished financial power, and he needs so little material.
“Thank you, today. I’m sorry.
I don’t know what to say to Mr. Leung except thank you. We never said we liked, let alone love. Mr. Leung is like my brother, like my leader, like my friend, but not like a man who haunts me.
Mr. Leung put in my bowl the fattest part of a fish’s stomach, “Eat more. I’m sorry.
Fish is good, but I don’t have an appetite.
All night long. Is Song Xianga really back? Why would he come back? What is he doing back here? Do you know?
It’s true that my best friend, Liang Nguyen’s phone came when I was going around my hair, and we snuck to the bathroom for a while, and I didn’t know why I deliberately opened the shower and pressed the toilet. The water was so hot that Liang Nguyen said, “The son of Song Jia was tired of waiting abroad to come home and be single and asked me for your number. I’m sorry.
“Did you give it to him?”
“Do you want me to?”
I used the last cell phone number for years, and I thought I’d find me as long as I kept it, as long as Song Jia remembered me.
But when I decided to be with Mr. Leung, I decided to change the number. At that moment, it was really decided to end up with Song Xianjia.
But when Song Xianga re-emerged, all the lovers who had tumbled through their youth, all the moments of love had returned. It’s probably rational to forget one person, and really forget one person, and it’s two parallel tracks.
“Or else, don’t give it to him. I’m sorry.
“Ha-ha, you said it’s too late! I already gave it to him! It’s not fair for you to take the boy’s regrets and spend the rest of your life with him. I’m sorry.
But how could I have dragged this on if I had the courage to hate and be able to let go? I kept scratching my head in the bathroom.
“Niko, are you in the shower? The water heater’s broken. The maintenance crew won’t be here until tomorrow. Mr. Leung’s voice came from outside the door.
I reached out and touched the cold water, “I, I’m washing clothes. And then you put it under the pyjamas and then you’re going to wet it under the tap and you’re going to screw it, and you’re going to open the door and you’re going to say to Mr. Leung, “It just happened that dinner got oil.” I’m sorry.
Mr. Leung dragged me back to the bathroom and took up the blow-blower and blew my skirt, “Don’t catch cold. I’m sorry.
Mr. Leung is really a gentle companion, and I often think that if I hadn’t met Song Xianjia, if I hadn’t tasted love, I would have fallen in love with Mr. Leung.
Unfortunately, when I met Mr. Leung, he knew that I was suffering to love Song Yi Ga.
3
On my third year of college, on his birthday, and on his video, I showed him my Yassy grades, and when I applied for a graduate degree in Los Angeles, and when I had enough money, I flew to stay with Song Xianga. I’ll cook for him, I’ll take care of him, I’ll make him fat and white.
I don’t think it’s a big deal that I went after the moon even after Song Jia became an astronaut. I like Song Xianjia, who looked at me from the third year with a cynical smile, from when he opened the Pandora’s Box to show me the other side of the world, and I fell in love with him.
On the third day, he said “break up.”
There’s a lot of fun in the video, probably in the PARTY, and there’s a lot of people called, “Lucca, Hucca, come on.” I think he’s sad because he’s wrinkled when he says “Sorry,” although he’s in a hurry to turn his head and say, “I’ll be right there,” and then hang up the video.
The heart was crushed on the ground. I crouched on the ground and cried, and I wanted to make another video for him. I fought myself a thousand times, and then I bit my lips and didn’t let myself go ugly.
That’s when Mr. Leung sat on the school chair and watched me cry from beginning to end. He had an appointment the other day, but was pigeoned. It’s probably boring. Mr. Leung came to me and handed me a tissue.
But I’m in a world of my own collapse, and I’m looking at Mr. Leung, a man with a maturity that doesn’t fit into the school, and my vigilance and hostility quickly come out. I’m sorry.
I knocked out Mr. Liang’s paper towel and then fell down and continued to cry. Mr. Leung stood by me until I slit my sleeves and decided to go back to the dorm and cry.
The second time I saw Mr. Leung was on a plane to L.A. when I graduated. The weather was bad that day and the traffic was getting worse. I stepped on a point to the airport, thinking I was going to miss the plane, and I didn’t expect to be lifted because it was full.
I thought maybe it wasn’t super.
Song Xianja didn’t know I was going to find him. I keep trying to convince myself that even if I break up, he owes me a goodbye. Only if we say goodbye. Maybe he’s just kidding me. Maybe just let me study and not distract.
The man next to me arrived before the plane took off. Because I was too excited to talk to the people next door, he was later than me, and maybe he was lucky enough to get up.
“My business class was bought. I’m sorry.
I didn’t think it was Mr. Leung. His voice is really good, low and magnetic.
I pretended I didn’t recognize him and never mentioned that we’ve met.
Raining outside the window caused delays and the aircraft waited long and long on the runway.
Perhaps because the future is full of unrealistic illusions, perhaps thinking that it’s time for me, I did not refuse, and even lamented, when Mr. Liang spoke to me.
The plane took off and the lightning struck outside the window. I was nervous, and the plane was climbing and falling, and many fell vertically and were pulled up.
Just like my relationship with Song Xianja, I’ve been chasing him from junior high to high school, to college and abroad. It’s too long to tell, like him or chase.
But long pursuits will wear out, and unsure efforts will be exhausted.
The plane is upside down, falling straight down, like a canoe, and it can be blown over by a storm at any time.
I suddenly realized that even after the plane crash, Song Jinga probably wouldn’t have known that I wanted to go to his country a year after I broke up with him. At that moment, I suddenly looked down on myself and I was sad. I closed my eyes and I think I must have cried and cried so badly.
Because I feel a warm hand covered in my hand, “Don’t be afraid, I’ve been through worse weather than this and it’ll pass.” I’m sorry.
I’m nervous not to open my eyes. Whether it’s a matter of concern from a strange man or a plane crash. They all make my heart beat.
“I like a girl as much as you like him. I’m sorry.
“And then?”
“Then she got married, and the groom wasn’t me. I’m sorry.
I was laughed by Mr. Leung. This story is a sad joke.
Then the plane was forced down in Tianjin, and there was a heavy rain all night, and I suddenly didn’t want to go to L.A. when the clear million-mile plane took off again.
I don’t go abroad, I don’t have a rich family like Song Xianja, I don’t have a colorful extracurricular activity, I don’t have high-level scholars to write a letter of recommendation for me, and I’m just an ordinary person from a small place who, with due diligence and hard work, barely fights those with talent and resources.
I’m just an ordinary little transparency that can no longer be ordinary.
Mr. Liang asked me, “What makes you think someone like Song Xianga can be with you if you want something? “She’s mean, but she’s honest, and she’s always poking me the last thing I want to face.”
Because little transparency has the right to love one ‘ s person, little transparency has the right to pursue happiness, and little transparency has the right to believe that if you work hard, a fairy tale can come to you.
But suddenly I decided to give up.
After college, I didn’t find a job, I used poverty to describe it as a year that wasn’t at all good, and I got a master’s degree in management in Qingbei.
For the third time, Mr. Leung, the lowest-ranking intern in the Sino-Wang Trust, made a record of his meetings with his predecessors and leaders, whom he had warmly welcomed.
After three years, Mr. Liang’s smile became more gentle, more steady and full of strength, with a sand-blowing spotlight on his head, shining without a trace.
That moment I realized that mature men were different from hard-core boys.
Mr. Leung and his team were very picky, and the old man’s programme was cut off several times, and I picked up the opportunity.
When the client hit him in the left, he gave him the right face. Clients like friction, let him rub. Clients want a full-time program, and it’s like first-time fixes.
It was the fastest year I’ve ever grown, as if all of this had been for this moment.
Mr. Leung is finally satisfied that I became the only of the eight interns left in the China-China Trust through this project, and that year I rarely thought of Song Xianga.
Liang Nguyen wants to introduce me to a financial crocodile with a room and a car. I didn’t say yes. I’ve got those, but I want them. I can’t get them.
On the day of the handover, Mr. Liang proposed to celebrate. I never knew that adult friendship came so fast, but it was just a couple of drinks.
I drank that day, and I don’t remember whether I cried or whether I cried and called out the name of Song Xianja. My consciousness is intermittent. How do you know where I live? Why isn’t he drinking? How do you get me downstairs?
Mr. Leung said that he was 40 years old and that he felt like he had to give himself a confession for the rest of his life, but he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life. He asked me, “Would you like to try? I’m sorry.
I looked at him and probably understood what he was asking, but I was afraid I was thinking too much.
That night I tried to bite my fingernails, and I thought I’d start by holding hands, but the middle-aged man was obviously a bit bigger, and Mr. Liang kissed me without asking, and I didn’t push him away. I was shocked by myself.
I thought my first kiss would be for Song Xianjia, but Mr. Leung was picked up later.
Now that I’ve been married to Mr. Leung for three years, if it hadn’t been for Mr. Song’s re-emergence, maybe Mr. Leung and I could have lived a warm day.
4
The day after the wedding, I went to work, as usual, and just as soon as I got to the company, I got a call from the head: 10 a.m. I got an appointment with the new fund manager of the Chiwi Foundation. The Chi Wei Fund is a small, new and unknown fund, but with the capital of the Red Sea, there is much room for future cooperation.
I have prepared several innovative products, but as soon as I walked into the guest room, I found out that this was an interview, clearly a hunt.
Song Xianga looked at me with that thoughtful, puny and mean look. I can’t help but lick my lips, and I can’t help but reach out to my tongue, and Song’s smile is full of words. I was too busy sending messages to my predecessors, who took over the reporting without asking questions.
I snuck out of the guest room, sweating my hands, and my back was cold.
I don’t want to hear it?
No, it’s just that I can’t stay in the guest room because I miss the flames that are buried underneath. I can’t stay in my seat either. I hid in the bathroom for a long time, and I thought I was done with my seniors.
As soon as I got out of the bathroom, I saw Song Jia leaning on the wall and the winner looked at me.
As if I were a prey.
After half a minute of confrontation, I lost, and after so many years, I was still no match for Song Jia. I’m holding on to the air, with my head up and my eyes open.
When I walked by him, I was suddenly dragged into his arms. I’m sorry.
His lips were so close, his hormonals were like hooks, strangling every desire in my cell.
“You don’t like me? You said I was your The One, past, present and future. I’m sorry.
Song Jinga is always so confident, and I’m always dead to death.
Yes, his heart was beating, and he could not have kissed him at once, and he performed a thousand plays in his youth’s dreams, and I tried to kiss him with my toes, and he laughed cynically.
I can’t believe I haven’t seen you for a long time.
His lips fell down a bit. His face is close. His arms and feet are soft, so greedy.
However, it is impossible to do so when the plane falls at a height of 10,000 metres; when everyone is shut off, microblogging is emptied and cell phones are changed; when Mr. Liang is promised to start a new life; and when he promises to be left to himself, to believe in himself and to pursue himself, I have decided not to love him.
Push it away. He grabbed me in the arm and put me on the wall and the kiss was about to fall.
Throw your hand at him with all your power.
I was shocked, he was shocked. It’s a sudden slap. I was scared and he looked at me funny.
“You’ve changed. You’re not a bunny anymore. You’ll bite. I’m sorry.
I turned and ran away from the scene.
“You can’t escape! I’m sorry.
The voice of Song Xinga is like a demon in his ears.
I asked Liang Nguyen, “Why did Song Liu Jia come back to visit me?” I’m sorry.
Liang Nguyen smiled at me and said, “Where did Song Xianjia go to look for you, it was enough to go back to his country and speak Chinese with his people. The wedding was no more than an old classmate. I didn’t expect to see you and Mr. Leung; have you ever heard that some beasts like to bite their prey even when they are full? And how can God allow his followers to worship? I’m sorry.
Liang Nguyen seems to have a good point, although I do not want to admit that I am a gamer.
SONG Xianjia’s ability to work is so sarcastic that he often asks me to give him a programme, but he talks about elementary school children as if he doesn’t know anything. As head of the company? I’m a little worried about Chi Wei Fund and Red Sea capital.
The more I rejected Song Xianja, the more he became visible, the more stubborn he became. And he looked in my eyes from cynicism to burning fire. He says I’m not like those girls. They’re looking for a quality of life in him, and I’m looking for a unique love in him.
Song Jinga said she was moved. What I said to him in those years, what I did, everything he did, he did. I don’t care about a married woman, I don’t care about other people’s eyes, I don’t care about the future, I’m an outlaw.
But I care. Today’s warm little day is a little bit of it. Even work is hard to keep. I have tried to establish myself in this society, while Song Xianjia has the capital to lead any kind of life he wants.
At that time, the first overseas branch of the Sino-Wang Trust in Los Angeles was preparing to open, and the leader asked if I wanted to go.
5
Home at night, making spicy clams, empties of shrimp sauce, garlic fan shrimp, two beers standing up on the table.
Mr. Leung came back to take a look at the platter before he sat down and said, “Niko, do you have something to tell me? I’m sorry.
“How do you know? I’m sorry.
“Because the shrimp line is a problem, you rarely make shrimp, and every time you pick a shrimp line, you’re working on it. I’m sorry.
It’s estimated that in front of Mr. Leung’s numerous visitors, I behaved like a primary school student, and I couldn’t help but lick my lips. I’m sorry.
“You want to go?”
I didn’t answer. We’ve been to many places since Mr. Leung, romantic Paris, warm Hawaii, hot balloons flying in Turkey, animal migration in Kenya, except for the United States, let alone Los Angeles.
We all know that the city is not just a city, it’s more like a Band-Aid on a wound.
The more you flee, the more you dream.
“Do you think going to L.A. would help you? Career development? Personal growth? Or do you want to get past the heart? I’m sorry.
The more Mr. Liang said that my head was lower, the more he knew everything, he never broke it.
I’m like a pupil who’s been criticized by a teacher, and I can’t rebut it or say yes. Because I don’t understand myself. Why do you want to see Song Xianga again? Why do you push him away? Why do you want to go to Los Angeles?
Mr. Leung pulled me to the table, “Let’s eat. I’m sorry.
It’s always worth a blow to cook for, and Mr. Leung, with his body, I’m well-natured and I’m fast and good at peeling shrimp.
But I couldn’t eat it, especially since Mr. Leung had put the peeled shrimp in my bowl, and I had the sour nose. Why THEONE is not Mr. Leung.
I applied to the company for a visit to Los Angeles, a qualification, a competitive interview, which was cumbersome, but it went well.
All the professional questions were well received, but the executive asked: “The first assignment to a company is three years, after which it can be decided to remain in or return home. You’re 30 years old, don’t you think about having kids for the next few years? Did you talk to your family?”
I’m mechanical.
I was in a very complicated mood the moment I got the notice. Liang Nguyen says I’m like a stubborn donkey and that it’s not enough to chase Song Xinga for eight years, and now I’m going back to the old world. Liang Nguyen asked me what I was obsessed with and what to prove.
That night Song Xianga asked me to meet, and I didn’t refuse. This is the first time that we have met alone since his return, and he is happy, and even has some kind of moonlight, child-like affair.
Dinner is set at the highest rotating restaurant in Beijing, and the country’s luxurious night is at its bottom. I tried to sort out the complex feelings, and when I was silent, Song was trying to find the subject, but after all these years, he had no idea what I liked or what he cared about.
I’ll put down my knife and fork, “Go to school, I’ll show you my college.” I’m sorry.
Song Xianga was surprised, but I took him to the most common university in Beijing, where he could not go.
Walking on a small campus, I pointed out to him, “In order to go to the United States, I’m writing a tutorial in this classroom, writing a tutorial in a dormitory, running on the playground, losing weight, reading in a small garden every morning, and I’ve been trying to get close to your world, but it’s where you broke up.
You don’t like me? No, no, you’ve been carrying my first twitch. But I decided not to love you. I’m not with the little girl behind you anymore. I’m sorry.
Song Xianga’s face was full of surprises, and he probably didn’t hear my confession, which I must have refused.
“I don’t love you because I’m married. I don’t love you because I don’t want to chase you anymore. I’m sorry.
How can Song Jinga, who has always been at the top of the pyramid, understand that snails who climb up have pride, ideals and self. I told him to stay put.
Just where I cried in my third year, I decided to drop Song Xianja.
“Bye. Say good-bye in person and never see again. I’m sorry.
Turn around and get out of here. You still love me!”
That’s for yourself. I just need a break-up ceremony.
Back home at night, Mr. Leung was lying on the couch, reading, and I hesitated to lie down. At his side, he lays on his thick shoulder, touching his tummy, which is slightly longer. Suddenly it was sad that Mr. Liang was just an ordinary man. Why should I do this to him?
My tears fell on Mr. Liang ‘ s pyjamas and Mr. Liang touched my head without asking me what had happened.
It was long, long, long, long until I cried. I want to make peace with myself.
Mr. Leung said, “The water heater is fixed. Shall we take a bath? I’m sorry.
I chewed on his shoulder and said, “Okay. I’m sorry.
Six.
Mr. Leung sent me to the airport on the day he left the country, but I didn’t bring much luggage, and Mr. Leung kept saying, “I can’t buy you anything if I go there, I can’t send you anything, I’m there alone, take care of myself, don’t be strong.” I’m sorry.
Mr. Leung held me in front of the security check, so tight, he kissed me on the forehead, and I could feel him breathing. I thought his eyes were wet, but he laughed and said, “Have a safe journey and send me a message.” I’m sorry.
I waved over Mr. Leung, “Niko, I believe you” like Dad sent his daughter to college, and I waved and turned around and I cried until I couldn’t see Mr. Leung.
I’ve been thinking a lot on the plane about every encounter between me and Mr. Leung, as fated as it was, and the timeline has been long, and those seemingly unexpected encounters have been made for the purpose of being together.
I don’t want to worry about THEONE, Mr. Leung.
The first phone call after the plane landed was Liang Nguyen, and she scolded me so badly she said she went to see Mr Liang after I left.
Mr. Leung listened to my music, looked at the books I read, watered my flowers and fed them to my turtle. And then we cried.
Mr. Leung is her uncle, who, as a child, has watched as he has been strung up, and has been able to do so in such a way as to ensure that everyone is envious. Mr. Leung is strong and never weak. Liang Nguyen said she had never seen Mr Liang cry.
She asked Mr. Leung, “Why let her go if she’s so desperate? I’m sorry.
Mr. Leung said, “You like her, and some people’s lives are destined to pass a few curves before they go down; you’ll be content only if you climb over the hill and see the world you want to see. She’s not a princess in the castle. She’s a soldier in armor. I’m sorry.
Liang Nguyen said that she knew that it was not appropriate for me and Song Xianja, that she had wanted to introduce me to my uncle, and that Mr. Liang had a room in his mouth, and that I did not agree; but she did not think that I had met Mr. Liang;
Mr. Leung asked Mr. Leung to give me my number, and Mr. Leung asked me to decide whether to leave the cancer in my heart to rot slowly or dig it up with my own hand.
I applied for the company’s assignment, and the company’s executive had asked Mr. Leung, a financial colleague, who was so reluctant but fully supported.
Liang Nguyen cried and asked me, “Do you have a conscience? I’m sorry.
If love speaks of conscience, there are no more heartbreaking stories.
I didn’t come to L.A. to love Mr. Liang, but rather, it was because I loved him and valued him that I wanted to pass through my heart and to be better myself with him.
He hung up the phone, sent a message to Mr. Leung, edited half of it, and made a video call.
Mr. Leung wasn’t very spiritual, his eyes were a little swollen, but he was still trying to maintain his gentle old man image.
“When will your company take your annual leave? I’m sorry.
Three years of marriage, I’ve rarely played Mr. Liang, but I’m just doing my wife’s job. Mr. Leung may not have thought that I was suddenly spoofing with him and that the mouths were exaggerating.
“Anytime, anytime. I’m sorry.
“Mr. Leung, why me? I’m sorry.
“I thought you were stubborn and stupid, but then I found out it was you. You’re looking for the light in your eyes. Whether you pursue him, work, study, you have more courage than Leung Nguyen, moths to burn. I knew you before we met. I just never thought I’d do it to my niece’s friend, and I didn’t think I’d put up with it. I’m sorry.
“Do you love me?”
“I have to.” When I fly to L.A. to talk to you in person. That’s the way to get serious. I’m sorry.
Hanging up on the phone makes me laugh like a fool. What it’s like to fall into the honey, just to feel so powerful.
I won’t let Mr. Liang down. I deserve better than him.
And I love him too.
It’s not a little girl’s passion for a boy. It’s a woman’s mature love for a man. Case number: YXA18KLJkjNix6y8M4ec9r9z
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
