I found brain cancer at the same time on the day I became pregnant, and I didn’t know what to tell Jiang Hui first, so I called him easily.
“If I were pregnant, would you be happy? I’m sorry.
“You’re not pregnant. He was sure without hesitation.
“Will you be sad if I die? I’m sorry.
“Mong, I’ll marry you. Don’t get mad. “It’s hard to hang up the phone.”
I looked up, but I saw him coming to the hospital with his youth.
One.
I didn’t wait until 11:00 in the house I lived with.
I need to talk to him about us, but I can’t talk to him at the hospital. I don’t want him to know about my pregnancy and illness, I don’t want him to stay with me for responsibility or pity.
“Kang Yee, let’s talk. I’m sorry.
“I’m a little tired. Let’s talk about it later. I’m sorry.
Under the orange light, Jiang Yi threw his jacket and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt, leaning down on the couch.
There is a strange smell of bathing in the air, coming from the river.
“Is it because of Sunday?”
And he sat on the couch, squeezing his eyebrow, and said to me, “I did not contact the moon after the last time you said it.” It was only a while ago that she came from our home to look for work and kept touching the walls, but she didn’t come to me, today because she had acute intestinitis and did not know anyone else. I’m sorry.
“I changed the clothes because she threw up on me. The bath was at the hotel, Meng was good, the moon was strong, she wasn’t like you. She wouldn’t have come to me if she hadn’t been forced to. I’m sorry.
After a while, it seemed that he had a hard tone, which he did.
“Don’t think. I’m sorry.
In fact, I’m sure he won’t do anything to Sunday before I break up with him, and I saw him at the hospital taking him to the digestive unit, and I was just asking.
But his answer made me a little sad, and I’ve always been a burden to him.
“Jang Yi, let’s break up. I’m sorry.
Maybe he waited too long at night and his head started to hurt again, but I tried to laugh.
He got up and he put me in his arms, and he got tired of me. You want me to marry you? I’m sorry.
“I married a break-up, and now I’m telling you I’m not safe? You’re not afraid I’ll break up with you? I’m sorry.
“Then break up really. I’m sorry.
I put down the sour in my throat and tried to give myself some dignity.
“Men’s fine. You know what you’re saying? I’m sorry.
His eyebrows got a little rough, too.
“I know, I want to split up with you.
He suddenly turned his head and started kissing me, but I ran away, and then the pregnancy came, and I kept my mouth shut.
“You smell. I’m sorry.
“Speak in your sleep. We’ll talk when you’re awake. I’m sorry.
He let me go into the bathroom, and I couldn’t even breathe.
I watched his back innocently and didn’t know how to tell him.
Two.
I did want to marry him before I knew that Sunday existed.
I really thought, from the first moment I saw him in college, I even thought about the name of my future child.
But after six months of knowing that Sunday existed, I mentioned that the breakup was real, not forcing him to marry with it.
But every time I broke up with him and explained to him that he was different from me and Sunday, he always said that I was forcing him to marry, that I was thinking too much, that he was just a sister for the weekend, and that he deleted the weekly tweets and deliberately kept her away from me.
His actions gave me the illusion that he really liked me.
Just like he did to me in such a close act, if he didn’t notice his unwitting indifference and impatience, and if he didn’t see what he looked like when he was on Sunday, if he didn’t keep it closer and closer, I would have been fooled by him again.
I don’t understand what happened between him and Sunday. If he likes Sunday, why are you with me?
I went after him in college, but the deeper I went, the more he responded to me, and he mentioned it.
3
Because I’m a bit sleepy and my head is so drowsy, I didn’t prepare breakfast the next day, as I had before, but instead I got up with the bread.
“What, still angry? Or is it uncomfortable?”
I was afraid that he would find me different, and I asked him, “If I am not well, will you take care of the Sunday or will you stay and take care of me?” I’m sorry.
The pitiful tenderness of Jiang Yee’s face fell apart.
“Mong’s fine. Why do you like moons and moons? I’m sorry.
His voice was cold and I almost cried.
I tried to explain a few times, but I found that the issues to be addressed had already been addressed.
It’s not that I had to make a comparison with Sunday, it’s that he made a difference between me and Sunday, like Meng and Moon, which is too clear.
I’ve told him before what he said, and he said, “Isn’t it just a name? I’ll call you “baby” more than she does, okay? I’m sorry.
I was happy with him, but baby. He shouted once, and after that he called me “Mong’s fine”.
“The bread is in the toaster. You can have the milk in the fridge. I’ll go to the company first. He left without a word.
Bang, bang, bang, bang!
4
After dinner, I told my girlfriend Chen Qi that I was not going to the studio, and Chen Qi called.
“Today the sun comes out west, and you’re running away today from a woman who doesn’t have a knife in the sky? Tell me, isn’t that big baby of yours finally starting to know? I’m sorry.
Chen Qi said I’m kind of sweet, and think about it, it seems like Kang Qi and I haven’t really done anything for me.
“I broke up with Jiang Hui. I’m moving. I’m sorry.
“What? I’m sorry.
She was silent for a few seconds, and then she went along with my decision, “Well, you finally broke up with that bastard, and I’ve seen that bastard before. I’m sorry.
Chen Qi asked me why I broke up with Jiang Hui, and I told her about the Zhou Moon, and I asked her, “Why didn’t he break up with me and marry me? I’m sorry.
“It’s not easy. The dog saw your father’s property and wanted to be a Phoenix. I’m sorry.
“But he’s earned more money than my father left me. I’m sorry.
“Who would think he had more money?” Chen Qi still doesn’t care, and then asks me, “Is there a lot of stuff? Do you want me to come over and help you? I’m sorry.
The nose was sore, I sneezed, I opened my eyes and found blood on the sheets and on the floor, and the nose was bleeding out of the nose.
I smoked paper towels in my hands and feet.
Chen Qi’s voice is still coming out of her cell phone. I’m sorry.
“A little cold, probably cold yesterday. I’m sorry.
“I’ll go with you. Look what you’ve done to yourself for scum. I’m sorry.
“Don’t…”
“Kitty, I want to be alone. I’m sorry.
“You can call me if you need me. I’m sorry.
I said, “Well,” and I said I wanted to go on a trip, and Chen Qi didn’t think much.
When I hung up, I packed the sheets and the floors, packed my own things, and just after I finished, a strange number was called.
“Men’s fine. Can we talk? I’m sorry.
It’s Sunday.
5
Watching the week of dehydration in the bed, I knew that even if it was a typhus, I should say, “I’m feeling better,” but I couldn’t say it, and I didn’t want to do it at all.
Sunday was one year older than me, two years younger than Jiang Huai. She was a neighbour of Jiang Hui’s old family, and they grew up together.
The first time I saw him was six months ago, when I went to visit his mother for the first time with him, and a woman dressed like a little girl saw him and said hi.
“You’re back. I’m sorry.
Following that woman’s sight fell on me and his face was cold.
“Who is this?”
“My girlfriend. I’m sorry.
Jiang Yi-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li-Li, but I can feel the look behind my back.
When I sat at Jiang Yee’s house for a short time, she brought a bag of grapes on Sunday, and she said that her grapes were ripe, so she gave them a taste, and then she gave it to Jiang Yee’s mother, and she went to get it, but when she picked it up, she shrunk back and said, “Jesting” to him in front of me.
“I used to skin your grapes. This time you have a girlfriend. Who do you want to? I’m sorry.
Jiang Hui looked at me as if he had ordered a banishment like Sunday.
“My girlfriend’s here. Do you want to go back first? I’m sorry.
The other night, I asked Jiang Yee about his relationship with Sunday, saying he was just a neighbour.
I don’t believe it, because Jiang Yee went out after dinner and had a “frequent encounter” on Sunday, and I heard him call him “Moon” on Sunday, which he apparently enjoyed more than he did on me.
“Your neighbor just provoked your girlfriend, and you’re happy to talk to someone else. I’m sorry.
I had a fight with Jiang Yee that night, and he explained that he had followed his mother in shouting “Moon Moon” , but only for over 20 years. He had a good relationship with Chow Moon, but Sunday was no match for me.
He also stated that he would marry me later, but that Sunday was just a neighbour and that he was not living in his home anymore, and not even in the following Sunday.
If I don’t mind the presence of Sunday, he can stay away from it, and if I do, he can call me “baby” later.
He did what he promised.
Only two months later, at 2 a.m., I got up and went to the bathroom and I accidentally found Jiang Yee’s cell phone on light, and the picture was on the news of Sunday.
“You don’t even like that woman. I’m sorry.
I’d like to see what he was talking about before Sunday, so that a “neighbor” texted him at 2:00 a.m. saying he didn’t like me at all.
I picked up Kang Yee’s phone to look through the chat records, but I found that the chat records were clean and clean, and there was only one phone call at 4 p.m. 37 minutes that day.
I don’t know what it’s like to talk to two people who’ve never had a chat record for 37 minutes, and I’m gonna wake up Jiang Yee and get him back to Sunday.
Jiang Ying hesitated for a long time and then called Sunday in front of me.
“Moon, I hope you don’t say that again. I made it clear to you this afternoon that who I like and who I’m with has nothing to do with you, and I hope you will not interfere with me again. I’m sorry.
“But you don’t like her at all, I can’t look at you…”
“Who says I don’t like Mon?” He said he looked at me as if he was talking to me on purpose and to me on purpose.
“I will marry Meng well, and I will only marry Meng well. I’m sorry.
And then he hung up on Sunday’s phone, and in front of me, he hacked the Sunday’s Twitter, QQQ and cell phone numbers, asking me if I was so happy?
“Don’t be angry, be good.”
He dealt with it simple and simple and then he put his arms around me and said he liked him on Sunday, but he was innocent. He couldn’t stop other people’s feelings, could he?
I think it makes sense that Jiang Yee was able to spend half a month with him and observe him and make sure that Sunday really disappeared from his life before he got back together.
But now, the Sunday of Jiang Huai Hae has appeared again, and this week has been “forced” to contact him, and I have become unreasonable.
I should’ve found out something between them.
Six.
“I kept your number on Kang Yee’s phone. It’s Sunday.
That’s a lot to say:
She’s free to look at Jiang Yee’s phone.
She came to me with her back.
“Tell me what you want. I’m sorry.
After all, it’s kind of boring, really.
It seemed like Sunday wasn’t expecting me to be so cold and direct, and her air was short in a second, and it took a long time for her to get back on the ground.
“Mong’s fine, leave Jiang Yi. I’m sorry.
“For what? I can go by myself if I want, but what right do you have to yell at me for “love”? I’m sorry.
And I looked not near at the Sunday, but I looked at her in a state of panic, and her lips were dazzled for half a day.
I smiled, and I didn’t want to waste any more time on her, but I just got up and saw the river coming in with a black face.
“Mong’s fine. You’re not done yet? What are you doing here for the moon? I told you, it’s not like you. She’s better than you. I’m sorry.
The slashing of his head and his face is like a single sting, and Ei-Yi has no mercy for me.
After he had dragged my wrist outside, he fought hard to earn his wrist from me without taking two steps.
I looked up at him and he was angry, and I was dumb.
“You didn’t think I’d be sick to see a doctor? In your eyes, is it only Sunday that I will never get sick? I’m sorry.
“Jang Yee, I’m actually calling to make Meng come. @SundaySunsee.
“Sunmoon is not like me. You’ve said it many times. It’s always been a tough and pathetic man in your eyes, and I’m a man of grace and desolation. That’s why I’m bullying her. I’m bullying her, right? I’m sorry.
“But do you remember that Sunday was at least two parents now, but I lost my mom when I was three and my dad died two years ago? I’m sorry.
“You’re seven years old and you’re alone with your mother. So guess how I grew up with my dad when I was three? I’m sorry.
“Mong is well…”
I’ve been knocked out.
And I covered my eyes with tears, and I laughed with my lips.
“I do love to haunt you when I’m with you, and I want you to send me umbrellas in the rain, to feed me when I’m sick, to talk to me when I’m bored. I’m sorry, I asked too much before. I’m sorry.
“Mong’s fine, I didn’t mean that. He said it was tough.
I still laugh, “Yeah, you don’t mean that. You just don’t care about me. But don’t worry, I won’t do it this time, and I won’t do it again. I’m sorry.
After all, I’m dying. I’ve only got a month. You two have time, I don’t have time…
7
I left the ward, dazzled as I went down the stairs, and threw myself off the stairs.
For safety, I stopped to rest in the stairwell for a long time.
Jiang Hui didn’t catch up.
I suddenly felt a little mean when I looked at the crowd, and I looked to him for a while, even though he was dead.
8
In the afternoon, I changed the hospital for the flow.
Before I injected the anesthetic, I felt that little life, six weeks, and my heart was sore.
I really wanted to have a baby with Jiang Yee a long time ago, most of all when my dad died, because there were no more people in my world who were so close to me.
So when We stripped the river, We begged him with a dumb voice, and asked him to have a child with me.
When he moved, he kissed me in one drop, “Really? I’m sorry.
I said “want,” but he’s only got no commitment.
See, he wouldn’t let me go even then.
After three months of my worst, Kang-Yi won’t even talk to me.
“Mong is well, you’re not well enough to have children. I’m sorry.
I argued with him, “That pulmonary disease doesn’t matter. I haven’t coughed in years, and even if anything happens, I want to have kids. I’m sorry.
After hearing the black-faced scolding of my nerves, he has since been careful to take measures, even though the doctor later said that my lungs did not affect the birth of a child, and he refused to give in.
I was moved to think that he loved me so much, that he was so careful about my body, but he wasn’t afraid that I would have an accident, he didn’t want me to have his baby, he didn’t want Sunday to be sad.
“I’m sorry, baby, but Mom didn’t do anything to get you here, and now she’s kicking you out again. I’m sorry.
“You’ve been here six weeks. You’ll be in pain when the machine smashes you, won’t you? I’m sorry.
And lo! lo! He hated the Gangay.
It’s the closest person to me in the world, but it’s a kid I love so much but not me!
He likes Sunday. Why are you trying to fool me?
Can’t he and Zhou-luon settle their own grudges? Why do you have to drag me into the mud and get me deeper and deeper?
9
I saw someone shaking.
“Mong is well?”
“Mong, wake up. I’m sorry.
I opened my eyes and saw a couple of people in white coats staring at me.
“Mun, you’re awake. You’ve passed the anesthesia. You’ve been unconscious. I’m sorry.
“Are you all right? You don’t look so good. Take a break. When you were in a coma, we called your family. Your family should be here soon. I’m sorry.
If I catch a nurse in a coma, they call Kang-hye.
I struggled to get up from my bed, to get out of here as soon as possible, but I was too weak to leave the bed, and I was paralyzed on the ground, and a pair of black heels stepped into my eyes.
I was relieved when I looked up at each other.
10
“Moon, you’re going to die. If you don’t call me at the hospital, do you want to hide it from everyone? I’m sorry.
Don’t you know about that piece of shit? I’m sorry.
Chan Qi’s voice is sore.
“Be quiet, it’s not a good thing. It’s embarrassing. I’m sorry.
I’m glad my emergency contact isn’t Kang Yee.
I forgot a few months ago when I was hit on my arm by a shelf, Chen Qi called Jiang Qi and told him to come to the hospital, but he couldn’t make it back on a field trip, so Chen Qi yelled at Jiang Qi, scolded her and spit on me, saying that he wouldn’t count if something happened to him.
When I thought about it, I changed the emergency contact to Chen Qi.
“You laugh! Meng is fine. Do you know I’m angry? Your parents are gone. I’m the closest person in the world. Why don’t you tell me? I’m sorry.
Chen Qi was staring at me, and she was so angry and heartbroken, “How come you’re so weak? It’s not because of that scum, is it? I’m sorry.
“Mong is well!”
A nurse came in suddenly, saw Chen Qi on the side, turned around and asked me, “Well, is this your family?” I’m sorry.
The nurse came and suddenly gave me a bad feeling, and I immediately said, “No.”
“Do you think I’ll kill you?” Chen Qi is angry.
“Nurse, what do you say? I’m sorry.
I’m still trying to stop the nurse.
The nurse hesitated for a moment to say what I feared most.
“Mong is well, your family has the right to know, and you’re too good to have an abortion. I’m sorry.
Eleven.
In the hallway of the hospital, Chen Qi was quiet and had a few mouths to ask:
“What do you mean, late brain cancer? What do you mean there’s another month? When did this happen? I’m sorry.
I say, “You’re going to die” and “You’re going to die”! I’m sorry.
“You’re 25, you’re 25, how can you have brain cancer? I’m sorry.
The more Chen Qi cried, the more I opened my mouth and suddenly felt like I was useless and didn’t know how to comfort her.
12
On the way back, I charged my cell phone to reboot, so I noticed that there were 98 uncalled calls, all of which were made by Jiangyei.
And 47 of them asked me “where” and “I was wrong” and “Please answer the phone” and explained to me.
The driver, Chen Qi, insisted that I stay with her, and I thought or refused.
“I’m sure it’ll be blocked if you stay with me at the hotel. I don’t want to see him again. I’m sorry.
Chen Qi would have looked in the eye because I refused, and heard it in the back.
“That dog thing, I didn’t mention a 98-metre big knife to cut people off. I’m sorry.
“I think it’s a bit of a tweak, but I’m gonna break up with you, and I’m gonna break up with you. What’s he thinking? I’m sorry.
“I’m allergic to scum. Don’t mention him in front of me. I’m sorry.
I’m not saying “good” and I’m trying to stop, but I see a message from Sunday.
“Mong’s fine, can you feel that Jiang Yee doesn’t like you? Do you know why Kang-Ye is with you? I’m sorry.
“When you left, Jiang Yee and I had a big fight, and he wouldn’t let me tell you, but I thought it was unfair to him. He’s had too much for you all these years. I have to tell you that even if he hates me, he won’t be with me, and you have to know what he’s done for you! I’m sorry.
Don’t you know that Jiang Yee was funded by your father and that your father paid him for his illness? He was with you because of the favor he owed to your family, and your father asked him to be with you. I’m sorry.
“He says you don’t know these things, do you know them or pretend you don’t know them? I’m sorry.
“But Meng’s good, whether you know it or not, don’t you think it’s shameful to buy someone else’s life? Jiang Hui is a living man, not a toy at your disposal. If you have any conscience, break up with him. I’m sorry.
13
It’s like a bomb exploded in my head, and I remember the details of the past —
When I went to college, my dad introduced me to Jiang Yee, who said that he was his friend’s son, that he was nice and that he was a schoolboy, and that if something happened to him, he could help me.
I looked up at some of my proud teenagers and I moved.
I’m actually a very self-reliant person, but to get close to Jiang Yee, I “follow up” my father’s words, and if I have a problem, I’ll find him.
The school ran the marathon, and I responded positively and told Jiangyee that he was forced to run the marathon.
I asked him, “Can you run a marathon with me? That long runway, I can’t get my legs up, but if you run in front of me, I think I can run the marathon twice. I’m sorry.
I told him that he was red, and he was really with me, and then he ran, and everyone threw the powder, and I threw him at me.
I’m not in his specialty, but we’re all in math, so I’m using the excuse that I’m not going to “please”. He was in his fourth year of high school, but he picked up his first year’s textbooks and taught me.
At the end of the first year of the year, I had to ask him to come to the stage for us, and he really promised to sing.
I was afraid he would never see him again when he graduated in his fourth year and asked him red-eyed if he could grow up in our city, and he nodded his head.
Everyone at our college was jealous of me.
“As soon as you see Meng, you’ll have no respect for Meng!” I’m sorry.
“Mong’s life is good. Even people like Jiang Yee can get it. I’m sorry.
At that time I enjoyed the envy of the people around me, and I enjoyed the one-size-fits-all. I thought that was his response to me, and I thought that he liked me.
So everything’s fake. Is it true that Kang-hye is good to me?
14
Chen Qi looked wrong, parked the car and looked different on my phone.
“This is the story of the two dogs. Is it true? I’m sorry.
I came back and shook my head.
“As for my father, he will hide from me what he has done to help him in order to preserve his dignity, but he will never do anything to blackmail him. I’m sorry.
“It’s just that only my father and Jiang Yee know the truth. My father died. I don’t believe it. I’m sorry.
I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s true that Kang Yee has been with me for seven years.
And suddenly I became even more angry with the river, and his own sacrifice plunged me into an unjust situation, and seized seven years of my affections, and wasted seven years of my youth.
But if anyone else loved me for seven years, I wouldn’t be so ridiculous.
I couldn’t help but say something evil: “Why else would I have made him and Sunday if I had answered the phone and made peace with Jiang Yi?” I’m sorry.
“I should have taken him for a month before I died, and I would have used my father’s grace to make him a will that would allow him to remain with me for the rest of his life. I’m sorry.
I can’t help but laugh.
But Chen Qi looked at me and she couldn’t laugh.
My phone’s on again, and Jiang Yee’s on the phone again.
“What are you going to do?” Chen Qi asked me.
I pressed the phone smiling.
“Think about it, I don’t want to talk to him. I’m sorry.
Last time, I don’t want to waste a second on unrelated people.
“If you don’t tell him the truth, you’re not thinking about him, are you? Qiyao Chen hates iron and steel.
“Mong’s fine, I’m telling you, you better not die. If you die, I’ll stab you in front of Kang-yee. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
“Then go fuck him. Don’t make him feel better. I hate it anyway. I’m sorry.
Kitty, I really don’t want you to be sad.
“Mong is good, Meng is good, you bastard! I’m sorry.
Chen Qi held me again and wept.
Listen to the buzzing cries, and I’m so upset that I want to live.
15
The next day, Sunday sent me another message…
“I see your record of calling Kang Yee. Have you made it clear to him? He’s in a bit of a mental state, he’s been drinking, but all right, I’ll calm him down. I’m sorry.
“Mong is well, thank you. I’m sorry.
Look at those words, I reply…
“O Sunday, you suck. You and Jiang Yi are a perfect couple.” I’m sorry.
When it was ordered, the blood of the red was dropped on the phone, followed by the second drop, the third drop, and I was in a hurry to grab a paper towel to cover my nose.
When Chen Qi came back from outside, she saw my face and fell on the floor, and she came over and covered my nose, crying and begging me:
“Okay, let’s go to the hospital. I’m begging you. Don’t make me look at you like that. I’m sorry.
Hey, this bloody scene showed my Kitty that she’d have nightmares after that, right?
I feel so sorry for her when I left.
16
My dad left me the money, and I was thinking about how to handle it.
Before I knew about Jiang Yee, I thought about giving it to the orphanage, but when I knew about him, I didn’t want to give it, but instead chose to put it in the studio that Chen Qi and I had founded.
The studio was my work and that of Chen Qi, and since she found out I was sick, I should have left her something.
After all this, I left silently on a month-long night.
(concluded text)
Jiangyee.
One.
When I was seven, someone came to my house and told me about my mom:
“The news that the Jiang Army is dead and he is a deserter is not for us to tell, but your family cannot enjoy the treatment of the families of the martyrs. I’m sorry.
The year we learned about it, my mother cried for months, and then my father’s old comrade came to see us.
A couple of uncles gave my mother a fortune and said some comfort, but one uncle, unlike her, gave her a little cash and asked her for a bank card number and left a cell phone number.
My dad’s friends are really giving us money, not only the cash they give us, but an uncle who punches 500 bucks a month on my mom’s card.
My mother started saying “good people” every day after she had received money for months and told me, “When you grow up, you must pay back.”
After a while, she called.
“My Lord, you are such a great man. I’m sorry.
He told my mother that he had a child but that his wife was dead, that he understood the suffering of such single-parent families and that he wished to help us within his means.
That’s the first time I’ve received any good information about Meng.
In the first year, my mother called and gave me the phone to give the uncle his birthday, and I listened to him in Mandarin, which was very exciting.
After I finished, my mom took my phone.
“Your father is so good because you can read and live. You are the father and father of Jiang Yi, or you should take the son of Jiang Yi.” I’m sorry.
My mother’s impudence, despite my will to refuse.
She’s a little worried when she hangs up, and the guy who calls us for money doesn’t take me for a son-in-law and doesn’t want to fund us, after all, it’s a test for people to spend years financing.
But for the second year, it’s not broken.
In the following year, my mother claimed to be a son, and I still didn’t want to.
I hung up on the phone and my mom said, “It’s been a long time since I was so nice to our family. I’m sorry.
She thought well, but she asked the village for a round, had to take a two-day train at Eunuch’s house, and a train ticket for 218 dollars and $436 back and forth.
My mom did the math, 436 bucks on us for a month.
Of course, she even had to pay for a phone call on someone’s cell phone, especially for a train ticket that expensive.
In the third year, the other side’s funding remains.
The other side’s funding has been on hold, but it started with 500, and I became 1,000 a month at the third grade.
For years now, I don’t even know what’s going on with my father, and I only call each other every year for the rest of the year, and it’s so great to see how loud the sound is.
My mother was used to it. She called when she didn’t make the call, and she didn’t give me any credit.
I’ve learned the manners and the shame of my mother’s behavior.
When I was a kid, she taught me how to thank you, but I know what I’m doing, and she started to keep people from funding our family’s affairs and didn’t want to pay back.
Why should we accept charity when we can make our own money?
I hate people like my mother, but I can’t stop her. She always reaches out behind my back.
Two.
And then I remember the year of the second year, and I always felt like a punishment, because my mother lived like a rice bug, so she had urine poisoning.
The town doctor said they could not cure my mother ‘ s illness, at least go to the county hospital, and the operation costs hundreds of thousands.
I took my mother to the county hospital, a set of tests was done, and the $8,000 at the bottom of the box was gone for a second, but there’s also good news that my mother and I have succeeded, and the only thing missing now is the operating expenses.
I borrowed money from my relatives and friends, and no one would help us, and I was advised to give up.
“Give up your mother. It’s an endurance, a regular renal dialysis. It’s an endless amount of money, unless you change the kidney, and if you give your mother a kidney, you’re not healthy. You’re still young. Are you really going to spend your life with your mother? I’m sorry.
I didn’t answer those who advised me, but I touched the number of Uncle Meng who had been financing us.
Uncle Meng, can you lend me some money? I’m sorry.
“How much?
“500,000. I’m sorry.
I told Uncle Meng about my mother. He didn’t say anything, he didn’t say anything, he only said he’d come to visit us for two days.
Two days later, he really came, unlike I thought he was younger and more kind than my classmate’s dad.
Uncle Meng asked me, “Did you really decide to give your mother a kidney?” I’m sorry.
I noded and thought he would persuade me to cherish my life, but he didn’t say.
“Kang Yee, I can give you half a million, but this half a million is not the same as the money I helped you with. This half a million is for you. You have to pay me back. I’m sorry.
“Uncle Meng, when my mom gets better, I’ll go out to work and earn money. I’ll pay you back your half a million, and I’ll pay you back my money. I’m sorry.
“Jang Yee, I’ll lend you the money, I’ll give you a call in instalments. I’ll pay for your mother’s surgery, but you’ll have to go to college for the next treatment, and I’ll call you in 985.” I’m sorry.
“Jang Yee, you’re the best in your county every year. You’re so talented, you’re so sorry not to go to college. I’m sorry.
When Uncle Meng said that to me, I didn’t understand what he meant, and when my mother told me that Uncle Meng wanted me to marry Meng, I went back to him and said, “He was raising me as his son-in-law from the beginning. I’m sorry.
But it was not until after I had known the truth that I knew that he was low, from within and from outside.
I wrote a note to Uncle Meng the other day, and he looked at me with great appreciation.
“It’s as if you’re a man. Jiang Yee, you know you’re a man of light.” I’m sorry.
No, I’m not. I’m ashamed of Uncle Meng’s compliment. He’s gone.
3
I donated my mother’s kidneys with borrowed money from Uncle Meng, and then I went to 985 college, and it was in Uncle Meng’s city.
I want to be close to Uncle Meng. I want to repay him.
I called Uncle Meng the day I went to college to report. He took time to see me.
He gave me a cell phone. It’s not expensive or cheap.
He also gave me some clothes, without a pick-up, and he said it was left over from a friend’s child, but I knew it was not, because he specifically bought a new one that feared that I would not cut it off.
After all these years, Uncle Meng did for our family.
When I was a kid, I didn’t want to see Uncle Meng as a dad, but after all this, I regretted it. I thought of Uncle Meng as a father. I envy Uncle Meng’s children for having such a father.
4
I’m popular at school, and a lot of girls like me, and I’ve been told a lot, but I’ve never responded because I know I’m not qualified to fall in love.
I went to college to platify myself and to graduate to honor Uncle Meng’s kindness, and I didn’t enjoy my life the way other children did.
Uncle Meng contacted me that year. He said his daughter went to college where I went. She just got to college and didn’t know anything.
It was the first time I saw Uncle Meng’s child, a girl named Meng, who was optimistic and enthusiastic and looked at her like she was looking in the mirror and she was completely my opposite.
I know Meng loves me, and she looks at me like any other girl who likes me, and she’s obsessed with hiding.
Meng’s always bothering me, and I wouldn’t listen if she was someone else, but she’s Uncle Meng’s daughter, and I’ll do whatever she asks.
I’ve been told that Meng and I are good lovers, and I’m not dissatisfied with, even a little.
How does it feel to be with Meng?
I guess, for the past 22 years, I’ve never felt that kind of joy, and being with her makes me forget everything, just remember that she liked me.
I think I like Meng too.
But I can’t be with her. I’m not the kind of guy who can get high like Uncle Meng.
I know I can’t be with her, and I can only enjoy my fantasies in rumours.
But I underestimated Meng’s feelings for me.
5
She had to take me to the lake on her 4th birthday.
There was a lot of traffic, and I fell into the lake.
I grew up in the mountains, and there was no water in our land, and we were all ducks, and I didn’t have the money to learn to swim when I came to the big city, so when I didn’t hit, I was all stupid.
The feeling of weightlessness has left me struggling, trying to catch something for myself, and I seem to have caught something in my panic, but I can’t calm down, I’m in the water like a headless fly.
Then I got rescued, threw up a couple of big spits, and I saw Meng being picked up and picked up in an ambulance.
The tourists around told me that Meng had jumped to rescue me the first time I fell down, that she wanted to drag me to shore, but I struggled too hard, that after she dragged me some distance, I stunned her.
Six.
When Uncle Meng arrived at the hospital, I shot him in the face over and over again and apologized to him.
Meng was the only daughter of Uncle Meng who saved my life and I killed her.
Uncle Meng stopped me, didn’t blame me.
But I can’t forgive myself, because Meng drowned to his lungs and left after-effects, and only very careful care could he cough when there was pollen.
They’re both very, very nice people, so humiliating.
What makes me ashamed is that I was with Uncle Meng at the hospital, and I wanted to open my mouth on a few occasions and ask him if he could allow me and Meng to stay together.
A lot of things, then became my heart.
7
When Meng graduated, I took her to school because my mother had no one to take care of her at home and because she was in bad health at home.
I’ve been working for three years, I have some savings in my hand, and I’ve been planning a break with Uncle Meng since then, but he laughed.
“Son of a bitch, if you really want to pay me back, you can pay me back when you make a lot of money.” I’m sorry.
And because Uncle Meng refused, I was able to treat my mother myself.
Meng has always liked to be present in front of me, and since she found out that my mother was here, she’s more often drawn in front of my mother.
The ones that couldn’t be hidden were found by a lot of people. My mom knew, Uncle Meng knew.
Soon after, my mother told me, “Be nice to you, your Uncle Meng wants his daughter to be happy and want you to be his son-in-law.” Kang Yee, our family owes you Uncle Meng’s house too much. I’m sorry.
My mother’s words are embarrassing to me, I like Meng well, and I’m going to repay Uncle Meng’s kindness, but I don’t want to spend time with Meng for his sake.
It’s like my life was bought by their family, and I’ll always be a subsidiary of their family.
I do not want to accept this condition, even if we owe the Mon family more.
But finally I promised because I couldn’t refuse Uncle Meng, who was so tall to me, but after Memphis and I made a good statement, his image was not so bright.
Uncle Meng came to me for a chat after knowing that Meng and I were together.
“You don’t have to give me the half million you owe me, but she doesn’t know I helped your family. I’m just a daughter. I’m sorry.
And when did I know the truth?
After Meng and I were together, on the same spring, my mother accidentally heard it in the bedroom when she gave my dad a incense, and she said…
“I designed to keep Jiang Yee with the Mon’s daughter, and we don’t have to pay back the money we owe the Meng’s, and he’ll be able to stay in the big city, and he’ll never have to wait in this ditch again. I’m sorry.
My mother’s words were like a thunderbolt on me, and I went in and asked my mother, “What did you just say, how did you design me and Meng to be together?” I’m sorry.
I can’t imagine how I feel about my life, because I’m so cold to Uncle Meng, and I’m so far away from Meng, and I’m so angry with Meng’s family that I’ve been my mother’s conspirator.
She thinks half a million is astronomical, and she’s been obsessed with the loan I wrote, afraid that Uncle Meng would put me in trouble, that my life would be ruined by debt, so she lied that she would force me to stay with Meng.
For not paying the money, to climb the rich Meng family…
I can’t believe that my mother can be so mean, but why not me?
I believe everything my mother says, don’t I?
Meng’s family has been skeptical of me, and I’m still asking them not to ask.
8
I hesitated for three days, and three days later I decided to call Uncle Meng and tell him about it.
But when I called, Uncle Meng couldn’t make it through, and I didn’t say anything until I got through.
“Jang Yee, my dad’s gone. I’m sorry.
I’ll be there with Meng to deal with Uncle Meng’s funerals.
At Uncle Meng’s funeral, I’m sure God’s been messing with me. I’ve worked so hard all these years to pay him back early, but now he’s dead.
Looking at Meng so weak, I can’t tell her what she doesn’t know, and how can I tell her, “Did I tell her that my father was a deserter and that your father had favored me, so I was only with you for your father’s favor? I’m sorry.
I can’t say that to someone I like.
Maybe I’m as mean as my mother, because then I can’t help but think, “Uncle Meng is dead and Meng knows nothing, so let’s just pretend that none of this has happened and that it’s not okay to be with Meng in peace.” I’m sorry.
I didn’t break up with Meng. I stayed with her and twice as nice to her.
On the one hand, it was my commitment to Uncle Meng, and on the other, it was my conscience.
I can’t, I can’t.
I’m like a sneaky cat, and I’m always wary of what I do with my mother and I’m gonna be discovered, and I’m always thinking about everything, and I’m gonna get a cold sweat.
I’m starting to get angry and angry.
I want to take care of Meng and keep everything I owe her, but I’m afraid to see Meng, because when I see her, I think of what I did with my mother, and I always have a low feeling in front of her.
I hate my mom. I don’t want to see her. I don’t want Mon to see her.
Then Meng took her back to visit my mother, and I saw her for years without seeing her neighbours.
Suddenly I was more used to my home, and everything in my home made me feel friendly. I was relieved and had a little talk with the moon.
But I don’t know why Meng was so angry that night because I talked to Moon for a few days. Because I called the moon and the moon and called her “Moon is well”?
It’s easy to solve. It’s not like moonlight. It’s easy not to contact her.
It’s just that when Memphis and I were together, I complained about the moon, I had few friends and fewer people to talk to.
So moon knows something but doesn’t know the whole picture.
Two months later, the moon suddenly called me to say that she liked me, that I should not sacrifice my life for Meng’s sake, that she knew nothing, and that she broke up with Meng under the banner of good for me.
Listen to her talk about her feelings. I couldn’t help but talk to her. I’ve been so depressed for two years.
Who knows that this is the phone, that the moon is going to go up, that I’m breaking up with Meng in the early hours of the morning and that Meng found out.
I couldn’t help it. I had to take the moon. She was too busy.
I’m innocent. I apologized to her and tried to prove my innocence, and I put up with my temper to beg her for forgiveness.
Me and Meng seem to be getting away from each other. I know why, but I can’t.
I’m increasingly afraid of seeing Meng well, as I thought when I first saw her, she was like a mirror to my life, and she was always able to reflect my lowness and make me ashamed.
I tried to restrain myself, but sometimes I couldn’t help feeling out of control, and suddenly I got angry at her.
And then the month came to the city.
I know she’s coming for me, and she’s the only person in the world who knows anything but my mother.
But I didn’t expect the moon to go behind my back and tell Meng about her father.
How can there be a woman in the world who’s so busy with her balls, who cares about my business, how does my life matter to her?
9
I went to ask Meng to come back, but she didn’t answer my phone, she didn’t text me back, and I was hacked, and everything about her in the house where we lived disappeared.
Look where it’s suddenly empty, my heart looks like it’s been cut off and something is going on and on.
Is she really angry this time? Will she ever forgive me?
When she arrived the following Sunday, she stood at the door and said that her mother forced her to go back for a blind date, she asked me if I could marry her and I told her to “scram”.
“What the hell are you doing? Why are you messing with Meng? Why should I marry you?”
Who let her go to Meng’s to talk about all that shit? Why would she hurt my favorite Meng?
10
And the next month, every day was hard for me.
I almost turned the city over, I went to Chen Qi’s house every day to block people, but I still couldn’t find her.
I’m going crazy, and Meng has never done this to me, and she’s always soft and lively in front of me, even though sometimes she gets angry, and that’s all fake.
She heard of a lack of security, especially after Uncle Meng died, and she kept talking to me.
Is it because what I said to her hurt her?
Or…
I suddenly thought of something, called Sunday.
Sunday found me, and I was happy to pick up the phone, and I knew you’d figure it out. I’m sorry.
“I just want to know what you said to Meng. I’m sorry.
“I told her everything the Mon family did to you. Jiang Yee, your life is in your own hands. Don’t give up on the Mon family. I’m sorry.
I’ve been listening to my brain, and Sunday doesn’t even know the truth, and she just knows part of it, if she tells Meng what she knows.
I can’t imagine how it feels after Meng knows the meaning of “the truth” out of context, which is tantamount to denying everything between me and her.
“You still there?”
I said with my fist in my teeth: “Soon and moon, you better not come to me from now on, or I’ll kill you.” I’m sorry.
Then I pressed the phone without waiting for her to answer.
I know something that I can’t hide, that I’ve hesitated for a long time, and I’ve decided to make it clear to Meng by text.
After that, I was relieved, and the stones that were crushing my heart were finally turned away.
But when I’m done, Meng still hasn’t returned to me.
Just that day, Chen Qi showed up.
Chen Qi is Meng’s best friend, and when Meung and I were together, she couldn’t like me, she used to run over me, and now Meng and I broke up.
I asked her, “Did Mon send you here? I’m sorry.
She didn’t say anything, just stormed into my company and threw things away until the security guards came up.
I don’t know. She came to me because Meng told her what I did.
That’s why Meng was angry when he learned the truth.
The next day, Chen Qi came back and, as on the previous day, said nothing but to rush into my company and smash things.
I asked her whether it was over or not, and she said:
“You either call the police now, or I’ll come every day, every day. I’m sorry.
“By the way, give her back the half million you owe Uncle Meng, and Uncle Meng’s money you’ve been supporting for years. I’m sorry.
I can’t say anything. I owe Meng too much. Chen Qi is Meng’s best friend.
Besides, I want to see Meng.
In Chen Qi, 18 computers, four big pots of view, two windows, my company’s employees were smashed and ran.
I can’t help it. I have to change my office.
And gave Meng $800,000, but she still hasn’t returned to me.
But Chen Qi is like a smelly dog and she can find me when I change offices.
The good thing is that after her, she only occasionally comes to my office and smashes things, not every day, as he did at first. In order to prevent the plague of Chen Qi, the doorway to my company is afraid to leave them.
Chen Qi is insane, and I hear she later released her criteria for finding a boyfriend.
You like her, you have to slap me three times to get to the point.
I asked her if it was enough for Meng.
She said, “Not enough, I will never spare you my life.” I’m sorry.
I’m so helpless that she smashes my things every day, people think I’ve done something to her, and all the women in my company are scared to quit.
Eleven.
It’s been a long time since I’ve seen Meng, not her people, not her. She seems to have evaporated from this city.
I texted her again:
“I told you everything. You’re the only one I love. Can’t I have another chance? I’m sorry.
Meng still hasn’t returned to me, except that Chen Qi broke into my company the next day.
12
Six months later, my mom asked me to go back for a date.
I didn’t want to go, but I thought, if Meng had been avoiding me, wouldn’t she be in a hurry if I went back to dating someone else?
I went back home, and my mother kept talking to me to keep my distance, and the parents of the village were short.
Some people I don’t even know, she tells me. It’s boring.
In my comments, I heard her mention of Sunday, which she said her mother forced her to marry, but her husband beat her up regularly on Sunday, and she ran home five times in the last four months, every time she came back with a swollen nose and her mother refused to divorce her.
When she came back from the week, her husband came after her and beat her up at her family’s house.
I said, “Oh, I deserve it.”
My mom listened, but she didn’t say anything.
I’ll see who my mother has arranged for me. I don’t have a problem with her. Just get married as soon as possible.
Seeing a circle of people, I finally found someone who could marry me right away.
I’ve sent invitations to friends, people I don’t know, and I expect someone to tell Meng I want her to rob me.
But she didn’t move. I got scared. Did she really want me?
I finally saw Chen Qi when all the guests arrived on the day of the wedding.
Chen Qi is here. Will Meng be far away?
I looked forward to Meng coming out, but I looked behind Chen Qi for a long time and didn’t see Meng.
Instead, Chen Qi came to me and punched me in the face, and she yelled at me with her red eyes: “How can you marry someone else? I’m sorry.
“What did you say?”
I can’t believe what Chen Qi said. She’s gone crazy so many times before.
She’s here on behalf of Meng. Meng’s making her do it means Meng hates me and hates me.
“Stop it, you tell me where Meng is and I’ll apologize to her. I’m sorry.
I finished, and the bride who married me looked at me incredibly and took off her veil and slapped me.
“Are you using me to get married? I’m sorry.
The bride then gave a look to her relatives, and a group of people came up and beat me, and my mother was scared and she tried to stop them, but she was pushed and beaten together.
When I was punched and kicked, I saw Chen Qi’s mouth and said:
“Scumbag, you’ll never see good in your life. I’m sorry.
13
I’m in the hospital for bleeding from a beating. My mom lives next door.
Chen Qi came to see me after the hospital and she asked me if I really liked Meng, and I said yes.
She suddenly smiled.
“You know, Jiang Yee, she was pregnant before she died, but she was so poor and she had a baby before she died because she didn’t want to have your baby, and she was sick when she thought of you. I’m sorry.
I don’t want to hear her say Meng is dead.
“Can you please not curse Meng? I’m sorry.
But she kept saying:
“Do you know how painful it was before your brain cancer died? The head is going to be sore, the nose bleeds like piped water, it’s going to take a lot of painkillers every day, but it doesn’t work. On several occasions, I saw her bellies, but she kept biting her teeth, afraid of my pain. I’m sorry.
“In the last few days, I couldn’t see anything, I couldn’t taste anything, I was so scared, but she was afraid of me, and she made fun of me, saying that it was fun not to see anything like hiding when I was a kid. I’m sorry.
Chen Qi’s words caused me to lose a little bit of my blood on my face, and I remembered what Meng had asked me.
“If I were pregnant, would you be happy? I’m sorry.
I said, “You will not be pregnant.” I’m sorry.
And she asked me, “Will you be sad if I die? I’m sorry.
And what did I say to you? I said, “Mun, I’ll marry you. Don’t get mad. I’m sorry.
Then I hit the phone.
So everything Meng said was true? I told her to leave me alone when she needed me the most.
And what am I doing? I’m with Sunday.
Then Meng asked me, “If I’m not feeling well, are you going to take care of Sunday or stay and take care of me? I’m sorry.
I didn’t even answer, she went to the hospital, and I questioned her and told her to leave Sunday alone.
When I saw her talking to her on her chorus, she felt self-esteemed, self-defeating, and made her feel superior to others.
I don’t know.
My heart hurts like it was torn apart. Everything’s on the line.
I pushed Meng so far, so far, so far, so far, so far as I’m concerned, I put a knife in her heart.
Whoo! I’m sorry.
I threw up a sip of blood and the doctors and nurses came in.
14
The doctor says I’m emotional and my internal wound is broken, so I don’t have to be emotional.
But how can I not be emotional, I hurt Meng so badly, I let her leave the world with despair.
After being rescued again, the doctor said that I could die if my wound was torn and bleeding, and my mother was crying to my bed after she heard me.
“Jang Yee, Meng is dead and people are dead. I’m sorry.
I listened to her, and suddenly I said so mean:
“It’s all because of you. If it wasn’t for you, how would Meng and I end up here?” Meng hates me the most, but I hate you the most. I’m sorry.
My mother’s face is pale.
I started calling Chen Qi, begging her to tell me where Meng was buried.
Chen Qi did not answer my question, but said to herself, “Do you know when you left well?” It was the night before you texted her, eight hours before you texted at 1.48 a.m. I’m sorry.
“When she was last lying in her bed, she was thin, her eyes were blind and her mouth was barely open, but she stood up and said to me,
She said Kitty, I’m so sorry. Why would I ever meet this guy, if he had never been in my life? I’m sorry.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier? Who will you tell? Who will you tell? Your so-called love, keep moving yourself! I’m sorry.
“Remember, Kang-yee, if you leave with a hate for you, don’t find a good graveyard to disgust her! I’m sorry.
Chen Qi’s words were inserted into my brain and resonated in my head.
“You know when you left well? It was the night before you texted her, eight hours before you texted at 1.48 a.m. I’m sorry.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier? You’ve been here so long for me, but you’ve told everything since she died. I’m sorry.
Why would I hesitate to tell Meng? Why shouldn’t I tell her sooner?
She left with a grudge against me, she’d rather not meet me in her life, and she thinks I’m dirty of her world…
“Ahem. I’m sorry.
I can’t help but cough up and bleed out of my mouth and the world is spinning around.
“Gang Yee!”
Look at Mom! I’m sorry.
“Jang Yee, don’t be angry, you hold on! I’m sorry.
“You’re the only one who left her alone in the world. What are you gonna do? I’m sorry.
“Jang Yi, don’t die…”
I’m sorry.
(complete) file number: YXX15 Q39ro6iYAX843pCNxNy
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
