My mom, she’s a bitch.
The worst was because I was in a car accident, and she yelled at the driver and sprayed it for over half an hour.
You’re sick, you’re stupid, why don’t you die?
I can’t do that.
The hit driver kneels on the floor and says, “You can pay me whatever you want.”
After that, my mom started scolding me.
Because she needs to help me roll over, massage me, wash me, change my diaper.
She won’t learn anything.
Especially with a massage, with a sweat on half.
When I can’t hold on, I want to scold. There’s no one else in the room, just yell at me.
“You’re sick, son. You ride a shared bike. I’m sorry.
“Damn X. I’m sorry.
“It’s hot, it’s bad, it’s car accident, it’s paralyzing, and I have to take care of it!” Why don’t you die?”
Finish the cursing, this big girl, it’s hot!
The stinging starts with a massage, a hysteria, a fragrance.
Put her to her full body and sit on her chair and suddenly laugh.
That’s the first time she’s smiled since my accident.
“I’m sorry, son, but I don’t want you dead. I’m sorry.
“Not for a while. I’m sorry.
“Shit, I’ll explain anything to you. You’re a vegetable. I’m sorry.
Yeah, I’m already a vegetable.
But I know everything.
After the accident, I left my body.
A ghost in the hospital.
One.
It’s embarrassing to look at your body every day and to be taken care of.
But even more embarrassing, my doctor and my former girlfriend, Kiki.
God knows how she got here.
My mom doesn’t know her, and she doesn’t seem to want to tell my mom about it.
It’s just that every day when patients communicate, it’s weird.
Kiki said don’t worry about her, she won’t wake up and in recent months she has to stay in a room to observe.
My mom said for months, let him stay here. I’m going home.
Kiki said it’s great. Don’t you want to stay and take care of it?
My mom said, what about my old dog?
Kiki said it must be the dog.
Every time I listen to them, I feel like I’m dying.
It’s a good thing my mother hesitated for a long time and called my aunt. I hope you don’t make a stew for decades. I’m sorry.
Hang up the phone, she pointed at my nose on the bed.
“My sister loves to eat dog meat. If there’s a dog, I’ll kill you. I’m sorry.
Two.
To take care of me, my mom had to rent a house near the hospital.
But after half a year, she’s retired for two years and there’s no room in her phone.
She was on my side with her cell phone all morning.
And finally, the next sentence, “The apple is stupid X.” I’m sorry.
She then pressed the emergency call button in the room.
Half a minute later, Kiki broke into the ward in a fire.
I saw my mom holding a phone, “Doc, you can rent me a house nearby. I’m sorry.
“That’s it?”
“Yeah…”
Kiki blew up, “Aunt, fuck me again. I’ll cut your son’s breath off. I wanted to do it! I’m sorry.
My mom, she’s looking forward to it. “When?” I’m sorry.
3
Kiki thought it would be great to help my mom settle down.
But she soon got her second fur.
‘Cause my mom made me a sour sauce dumpling in a rented house.
Kiki won’t let me eat, he can’t mix up a muddy gastric tube, and my mom will feed me with chopsticks.
My mom said, “You’re a fool. I’m sorry.
Kiki said, “You’re stupid, right? Can your son open his mouth?” I’m sorry.
My mom swooned.
Then it took about 20 full seconds to sort things out.
My mom said, “Let’s go. I’m sorry.
Kiki: “Ooh! Push harder!”
My mother said, “Can my son turn around? No, but I can turn him over. I’m sorry.
Kiki, “Where are we going? I’m sorry.
My mother said, “Can my son go to the bathroom? No, but I can do it for him. I’m sorry.
Kiki, “I said aunty…”
My mom, “My son can’t talk, but I can open his mouth for him, you see, just like that…”
My mother began to squeeze my chin, to devastate my jaw…
Enough! Qi, “You can do it! Why don’t you die for him? I’m sorry.
My mom smiled, “You think I don’t want to? I’m sorry.
Kiki was silent for half a day.
“Uncle, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
“It’s nothing, ah, so I fed it…”
“Don’t you fucking think about it! I’m sorry.
4
My mom was beautiful when she was young.
Before I was 10, I always thought my mom was the best-looking person in the world.
Unfortunately, she was overtaken by a singing actress on TV.
The day I found someone prettier than my mother, I collapsed.
I’ll go to Mom and tell Mom that this woman is not human.
She’s packing dumplings and she’s watching TV.
“How come it’s not human? I’m sorry.
‘Cause people don’t look better than you. I’m sorry.
My mom laughed, but soon she found something wrong. She looked at me on TV and said, “Do you think she’s prettier than me? I’m sorry.
I looked at them very carefully, “Yeah. I’m sorry.
My mom threw the scepter, “No more fucking, no more! I’m sorry.
But I’m not worried about no dumplings at night.
She’s always like this, ever since Dad left the house, she’s been playing with me and making fun of me.
So when I can’t even carry the nine-by-nine scale, I’ll have a girl who’s in her thirties, married, and heard of the mountain oath.
And that’s why I’m on campus, and I just have instincts to get a lot of girls.
And then I grew up and finally realized that there were a lot of girls in the world who looked better than my mom.
Especially when my mom’s getting old.
“You didn’t find me a daughter-in-law. I’m sorry.
My mom always complained about it when she wiped me.
“There is a daughter-in-law who can at least help. I’m sorry.
Her rinsing techniques are ripe, her towels are soft, wet and dry, and with the temperature, every inch of her skin is touched.
Kiki says I’m the first patient with a small sprout.
“But it’s better to look for a daughter-in-law than I can take care of people. I’m sorry.
“I’ll have to kick you out in two months if I see something real. I’m sorry.
“And then you wake up, and you’re happy, and suddenly you realize, ah, your wife is gone, you’re excited, you’re a plant…”
She was laughing herself.
After noon, the sun shined on her.
She had the same pretty side face as she did when she was young.
Sweat to the tip of the nose and a dimple to the mouth.
And, in just a few days, new hairs and stripes.
“When will you wake up, son? I’m sorry.
She asked softly.
Quietly, like, I’d be angry if I got in a hurry.
“When will you wake up?”
I suddenly found out my mom hasn’t yelled in a long time.
She’s whispering now, not the kind of gentle.
She seems, just too tired.
Every time I massage, I get tired of sleeping by my bed.
So now she’s not even strong enough to swear.
At that moment, I had the first thought since the resurrection:
I don’t want to keep my body in my bed anymore.
I want to stay with her.
5
That night, “I” followed Mom for the first time out of the ward.
No one can see me, no one can hear me, no one can touch me.
I went with her to her rented house.
It’s a very worn-out neighborhood, wall-covered, dark-lane, squeaky door.
The space agency in the house urged that, although my mother had nothing to do with it, it was still crowded.
I saw her pick up a bag of dumplings from the fridge where the noise was spreading. It was probably for me. Kiki wouldn’t let me eat, so she brought it back.
Then she went into the kitchen, lit the fire, burned the water.
Only six, in the pot.
Stand by the stove and wait.
“Is that all? I asked her, but she didn’t answer me.
A few minutes later, dumplings came out. She’s in the living room, eating alone.
She’s got a small mouth. She can only bite half at once.
So eat very slowly.
“I’m really good at it. “My son can’t eat well.” I’m sorry.
She’s laughing herself again.
But when she ate the third one, she suddenly stopped.
Her mouth began to tremble a little and she could no longer swallow food.
Tears fell from the cheek, one drop, two drops, all in the plate.
“My son’s a real loser. I’m sorry.
She rang.
“So good dumplings can’t be eaten. I’m sorry.
“Hey…”
“It would have been nice to have a few more. I’m sorry.
After a long time, she sighed.
Tears were wiped, and the rest of the dumplings couldn’t eat.
Six.
I always thought my mom would never cry.
She’s kind of a bitch.
When my dad filed for divorce, she laughed at my dad.
She said get the fuck out of here, stupid X.
I was little, scared, holding my mom.
My mom touched my head and said don’t worry about my son. He’s not gonna be able to make it. We’ll eat steak later.
Once more.
My grandmother died.
My mother was the best of brothers and sisters and broke into the city alone, so the funeral was all her own.
She was busy in the country for three days and then came home with her eyes swollen.
I said, Mom, are you crying?
She said, “No, it hasn’t closed in days.”
I thought it was reasonable.
After all, when she faced me, she was calm, calm.
Except that she begged me that night.
“Son, can you sleep with Mom today? I’m sorry.
So now, for the first time in a small rental house in Beijing, I saw her cry.
So she’s not gonna cry.
Just not in front of me.
7
But all of my mother’s insistence fell apart when I was rescued.
She broke in and saw me under electric shocks, kneeling down and crying.
And Kiki couldn’t care less about my mom.
She’s holding a shocker, directing a few emergency doctors, “One, two, three.”
Bang!
One, two, three.
Bang!
My body moved with electric shocks.
However, the EKG remains a straight line, with no half-point fluctuations.
Finally, a first aid doctor whispered, “Kiki, it’s been half an hour, he can’t be any more…”
“Shut up! “One! Two! Three! I’m sorry.
Bang!
“You pull yourself together, Fan!” Kiki shouts.
Suddenly, she looked back and looked at me…
Look at me in the state of the soul.
“Come on, you son of a bitch! I’m sorry.
It was only then that I realized that two months of being a soul, only Kiki, would go around me every time I walked.
She can see me!
It will!
This is more important than anything.
Ghosts in the morgue told me you can only be possessed if you find someone who can see you.
“That’s the only one who can see you. I’m sorry.
“and then you can hug Mom again and say goodbye to her. I’m sorry.
Give me a hug, say something, say good-bye.
This is my last wish before I die.
Thinking of this, my heart Electrograph finally shook.
8
“You can just see me, stop pretending. I’m sorry.
I followed Kiki all day after the rescue.
Explain to her how miserable she was, how miserable she was in bed, how hard her mother took care of me.
But she’s been ignoring me.
Until I said, “I was wrong. I was wrong. I’m sorry.
She’s probably instinctive, and she said, “What’s wrong? I’m sorry.
“I… shouldn’t break up with you. I’m sorry.
“And, think again.” She said.
“It’s wrong not to leave you.”
“You’ve hacked me! And…”
“What else?”
“and your botanist didn’t tell me, or your friend told me! If it wasn’t for someone else, how would I apply for a transfer here? I’m sorry.
I waited half a day.
“Kiki, have you thought about it? I won’t tell you. It’s probably because I’m a vegetable now. I’m sorry.
Her eyes blinked, apparently endorsed my words.
“I don’t care! You’re wrong!”
“Okay, I was wrong!”
Kiki looked at me.
The girl’s angry, very nice.
She said, “Okay, I’ll do what you want me to say. I’m sorry.
I said, “I’m possessed. I’m sorry.
Kiki: What the hell? I’m sorry.
10
I took Kiki to the mortuary of the hospital, where all the ghosts were located.
The ghost’s boss is a little girl, looks like only 156, but according to her, it’s 92 this year.
I said you’re a girl.
Then I got beat up by those ghosts.
The little girl says it’s easy to possess, that Kiki wants to let herself go, and I want to have a strong appetite for possession.
“Then, you two kiss. I’m sorry.
Kiki only knew me, couldn’t hear her, so I translated.
I said, “She made us kiss.” I’m sorry.
Kiki: “Ah?”
Little girl: “How hard is it? I’m sorry.
I said, “We have to listen to the grandmother.” I’m sorry.
Little girl: “Who the fuck are you? I’m sorry.
I said, “You can’t get in.” I’m sorry.
Kiki: Don’t you fucking think about it! I’m sorry.
Then I really touched Kiki’s lips.
It’s been a long time.
And then the whole mortuary ghosts cheer up.
Kiki: “Is this not possessed?”
The little girl: “It’s a lie to both of you, but it’s just a finger. I’m sorry.
I said, “She said, “Just touch your fingertips.” I’m sorry.
Kiki: “Are you kidding me?”
Little girl: “I just want to see how young people kiss.” I’m sorry.
That day, I was attached to Kiki’s body and she saw me again.
Eleven.
When I pushed the door, my mother was touching my cheek on the bed, and she looked at it so quietly.
When Kiki came through the door, she turned her back on her hand and smiled and said, “Hey, is it time to check the room?” I’m sorry.
I didn’t know what to say.
Just, especially, want to call Mom.
The little girl, however, had warned harshly not to do so.
It is the most important rule of possession that the possessed ghost cannot identify with the people of the sun, or else the spirit will fade away immediately.
My mom looked at me, and she smiled, and she said, “Does she want to see anything? I’m sorry.
“Well… yes. I’m sorry.
My mom laughed, “Well, you’re his girlfriend, right? I’m sorry.
I didn’t show her a picture of Kiki.
“How do you know? I’m sorry.
She smiled and looked at me, and she said, “You look like a star when he was 10. I’m sorry.
“You remember that?” I said.
“I remember everything about my son. I’m sorry.
Her eyes fell back to her bed and her smile was tender.
“Do you want to know about his bed wet? I’m sorry.
That smile is not gentle…
Kiki shouted in my body: “Yes, yes, let her say!” I’m sorry.
I said, “No, don’t say.”
My mother/Kiki said, “Che!” I’m sorry.
12
Grandma asked me, you’ve reached the limit.
I said, what’s the limit?
She said it was going to disappear.
She’s pointing at my deteriorating spirits.
Grandma said it’s a sign that you’re dead.
When I asked my grandma, couldn’t I go back to myself?
She said, “How many vegetable men have you seen waking up? You and us, we’re going to disappear.”
As a doctor, Kiki, of course.
She knew that even if that rescue had succeeded, it had not reversed my downward trend.
“A month at most. She whispered to me.
After that, she comes to my room every day after work, and I’m gonna get a little bit of crap.
Kiki told me to stay with Mom while she’s alive.
“After all, if you go, I won’t come to your mother. I’m sorry.
So I took care of me with my mother…
This logic is actually a little off, but it is.
I used Kiki’s body, with my mother, to flip over, wipe and massage myself in bed.
“You better forget about changing diapers. My mom says.
“I want you to remember the cleanness of my son. I’m sorry.
13
After that, I borrowed Kiki’s body every day with my mother.
Let the day flow like this.
I bought food with my mother, and she bargained with the vendor every day to save money in that little rental house.
She could actually take me back home.
It is only that she still believes that the capital’s medical treatment will cure me and, more importantly, that she believes only in Kiki.
However, uninterrupted hospitalization costs, as well as repeated expert consultations, allowed insurance and compensation to be paid, and my mother ‘ s savings were then depleted.
She started to borrow money from everyone around her.
Later, no one answered her call.
But she refused to pay Kiki a penny for her, saying that she had done too much to go on.
Hospitals are a desperate place, even for a ghost like me.
A few ghosts in the morgue have disappeared so quietly, of course, a few new ones.
Later, the little girl left.
Before she left, she appeared in my ward.
“Yang Xiaofan, I come to say goodbye. I’m sorry.
“Something’s lied to you. I’m only 15. I’m sorry.
“But the methods of possession, I didn’t lie to you. It’s all made up by ghosts in this morgue. I’m sorry.
“And I am the boss of the morgue. I’m sorry.
“Always, the youngest victim is the boss. I’m sorry.
“Now there’s a new 10-year-old boy. He’s the boss. You’re gonna be nice to him. I’m sorry.
I said, “Grandmother, will you be reborn?”
She said, “I don’t know. I think it’s all a lie.”
I said, probably.
She laughs, says, but if there’s a turn, I’ll take care of you later when you’re born!
14
The witch disappeared.
It makes me even clearer that I will disappear myself.
That day, I used Kiki’s body to ask Mom, “How do you wrap a sour dumpling?” I’m sorry.
My mom says it’s easy.
I said, “Yan Xiaofan has always said that your bag of dumplings is the best in the world. I’m sorry.
That night, I was invited by my mother to rent a house and pack dumplings with her.
I’m a klutz, my face is thin, and I’m so ugly.
But it’s good that Mom’s around to fix it and it’s still good.
Three months after the accident, I finally ate Mom’s dumplings again.
I’ll swallow.
My mom was there, looking at a skinny little girl, eating dumplings like a starving ghost.
She said I know why my son likes you.
I said, ’cause I look like that actress.
My mom shakes her head and says, “You and my son are so much alike, even eating dumplings.”
I said, you did good.
My mom said, “How can it taste good?” Actually, I don’t always have a recipe. I’m sorry.
I said, “What is wrong with you?”
My mom said, “It’s crazy. Sometimes there is more meat, sometimes more salt, sometimes the ginger tails are early and sometimes they are simply forgotten. I’m sorry.
I said, “This too?”
My mom said, “I don’t think so, but my son loves it. All over the world, he was the only one who thought my dumplings were delicious… Then he came to Beijing. He said he’d always take out, APP statistics, 50 dumplings a year. I said you’d be good out there. You don’t like Mom’s bag anymore. I’m sorry.
I said, “No way, you’re good.” I’m sorry.
My mother said, “Yes, he said, “The dumplings outside, and his mother…”
I said, “It’s like a fucking pig feed. I’m sorry.
My mother said, “That’s it, pig feed. He’s smitten.” I’m sorry.
My mom was laughing herself again.
She hasn’t done that much lately.
I said, auntie, stop talking and eat.
She said auntie would just watch you eat.
“You’re like my son, auntie. I’m sorry.
15
A month, soon.
Kiki’s predictions are quite correct, and my organs are starting to fail, and my heart breaks frequently, and I’ve been living with ICU.
Notices of danger, one after another.
One by one, get my mom to sign.
After a rescue, Kiki said to my mother that it might be a few days…
It’s not over. It’s stopped by my mom.
Kiki and I had all the psychological preparations, just my mom, not really.
Recently, I’ve lost my strength.
But Kiki was still with my mother, doing everything for her.
One time after lunch, when the sun was good, my mom sat on her chin and said, “What’s so good for my son? I’m sorry.
Kiki said, “I like it. I’m sorry.
“What do you like about him? I’m sorry.
“I don’t know, like, 5,000 bucks for a credit card. I’m sorry.
“My son is so stupid?”
“Well, when I didn’t graduate, it rained and he rode eight kilometers to my school, and he forgot his umbrella. I’m sorry.
“Dumb X-ah this is.”
“And, by encouraging me to study, I got the full award and he broke up with me. I’m sorry.
“Why?”
“He said he was a little planner, and I’d become a famous doctor and he’d slow me down. I’m sorry.
“Wow, my son’s a good dog. I’m sorry.
Aunt, I didn’t say that…
My mom took a sip of me in the bed and then she asked Kiki, “Yeah, Aunty’s curious about one thing. I’m sorry.
What is it?
“You can see my son, right? I’m sorry.
16
What are you talking about?
“You’ll see him, or you’ll be him, right? I’m sorry.
Aunt, I’m Kiki. I’m sorry.
“Why are you so like him? Even a little move, even a smile. I’m sorry.
“Maybe we’ve been together too long. I’m sorry.
“You can’t fool me, you can’t fool me! No son can lie to Mom! I’m sorry.
Auntie…
Mom grabbed Kiki’s shoulder, staring at her in the eye, “Look at me! I can see everything! I’m sorry.
” Aunt, you… hurt me. Kiki struggled.
A long time.
Mom suddenly said, “Why is it not?” I’m sorry.
She let go of Kiki’s shoulder and sat in the chair.
“Sorry, Kiki, sorry. I’m sorry.
Auntie…
“I’m fine, I may… I just miss him a little. I’m sorry.
17
After my mother ran out of the room with her eyes red, I said to Kiki, “Let me possess myself again.” I’m sorry.
“You can still possess? I’m sorry.
“It’s probably the last time. I’m sorry.
“Do you want to meet her? I’m sorry.
“Yeah. I’m sorry.
“You know the consequences, you’re gonna blow your mind. I’m sorry.
“Kiki, I was going to lose my soul. I’m sorry.
“But you can still be reborn, right? I’m sorry.
“That’s what they say. I’m sorry.
“But I believe. I’m sorry.
“Believe in what?”
“I believe you have the next life, many others…”
So what? I don’t know you, and I don’t know my mother. What the fuck am I supposed to do next life? I’m sorry.
She’s been silent for a long time, and she’s finally whispering, “I don’t need to see you again, as long as I know you’re back in the world. I’m sorry.
She reached out with her finger, and she said, “Your mother, she must think so too. I’m sorry.
18
I’ve had a hard time losing my energy.
And I had a feeling in my bed.
The EKG is in a rapid decline and the gap between each beat is being stretched.
The automatic alarm went off.
My mother called me crazy, but the first aid doctor who came in came out.
And this time, I didn’t have a follow-up room.
In the hallway, my mom was paralyzed on the floor, but unlike the first time she went into the ICT, she had no strength to cry.
She was just crying with her hands in her eyes.
The cry was helpless and weak.
It’s a kind of, truly real, desperate death.
I borrowed Kiki’s body, I went over there and crouched in front of her.
I said, auntie, are you ready to split?
My mom doesn’t talk.
I know that all she’s thinking now is on the first-aid body of the ICTU.
That’s good.
I don’t want her to care too much about what I said next.
Because I’m saying a last words.
But if anyone who listens, knows it’s a last words…
Very cruel.
I sat next to her against the wall, with her, feeling her warm shoulder.
“Aunt, my mom, actually looks like you. I’m sorry.
19
“Oh, my mother, I love to curse. I’m sorry.
“And it’s only three words. You’re sick. You’re stupid. I’m sorry.
“Sale fish, when water is poured into a bag, she curses, she calls a cab, she turns around, she scolds, she beats mahjong, she loses, and she scolds. I’m sorry.
“Then my mom started scolding me. I’m sorry.
“I was hospitalized, big operation. I’m sorry.
“She needs to help me turn over, massage me, wash me, change my diaper. I’m sorry.
“She can’t learn anything. I’m sorry.
“Special massage, half-stamped with sweat. I’m sorry.
“When I can’t hold on, I want to curse. There’s no one else in the room, just yell at me. I’m sorry.
“It turns out there’s something going on. I’m sorry.
“Then she scolded me after her massage.”
I saw my mom looking at me.
The eyes are full of tears.
There’s a lot to say. There’s a lot of emotions.
But she did. Look at me.
“Is she still scolding now? I’m sorry.
I shook my head and said, “She’s too hard to yell at. I’m sorry.
My mom said, “You must be angry when you yell at me. I’m sorry.
I said, “No, she’s cute when she scolds. I’m sorry.
My mom nod her head.
Seems a little relieved, but sad.
” Aunt, I know you’re gonna suffer, but you know, Yang doesn’t want you to. I’m sorry.
“He wants you to cut prices, play mahjong, yell at people. I’m sorry.
“He likes the way you spill. I’m sorry.
My mom didn’t answer me.
When she was silent, she asked me, “Can we not go? I’m sorry.
She cried, “No, I’ll tell you anything. I’m sorry.
“You go, I promise you nothing! I’m sorry.
“I know who you are now. I’m sorry.
“I know. I’m sorry.
“Mommy… Mom’s old, different from when she was young. I’m sorry.
“Mommy’s old and can’t take care of herself. I’m sorry.
“Don’t you go away! I’m sorry.
20
And behold! We hear a loud and sharp sound.
I know, my EKG has become straight.
In the hospital, the long walkway rotated, the light painted the glamorous ring, and everything was twisted.
And then it looks like it’s going to break, fold, change.
It seems that again, in my brief life, many moments.
It’s my mom’s vision.
I saw her getting younger, and I was getting younger, and those images were just a little bit dark.
I saw her at the airport, standing outside the security checkpoint, waving at me from a distance.
I saw her at the graduation ceremony, sitting under the stage where the lights could not shine, smiling at me.
I saw her screaming outside the entrance exam in the crowd, ready to take me to dinner.
I saw her put me on the bus, told me to listen to my class, but be happy.
I saw her holding my hand, walking for the first time, running, seeing stars for the first time.
I saw mid-summer late in the night, in an old house with no air conditioning, she sat on the table and fanned for me, six or seven years old.
I said go to sleep, don’t slap.
She said you fell asleep, and Mom did.
I said, “Mom, I’m going to fall asleep soon. Don’t be too hard.”
What time does she get up tomorrow morning?
“You can rest in bed, but you must wake up. I’m sorry.
“Okay. I’m sorry.
“You must wake up!”
“Fake you as a puppy. I’m sorry.
21
And when I woke up, Mom was lying by the bed.
And I’m not floating anymore.
I feel weak, but I can feel everything around me.
Outside the window, the sky is blindfolded, with rare birds ringing, and it seems to be another mid-summer.
I didn’t dare to sit up in the middle of a fight.
At that point, the door to the ward was opened, and it was Kiki with a black eye.
She saw me waking up with surprises.
I made her a silenced gesture.
She immediately Noded and sat in the corner.
Then I lay still in bed, gently holding my mother’s hand.
It’s about half an hour later, and the sun’s stronger.
It’s warm enough to come in, very comfortable.
Mom woke up a little bit, her eyes opened, and I was looking at her, and the whole person sat up.
Son?
She was surprised.
“You awaken son? I’m sorry.
“Why didn’t you call me when you woke up? I’m sorry.
“Does it hurt? Does it hurt? I’m sorry.
She asked like a bead cannon and was panicking more than ever.
“Are you thirsty? Are you hungry? Want to eat? I’m sorry.
“You can’t talk for three months, can you? I’m sorry.
Finally, I found a gap and put a word in it.
I said, “Mom. I’m sorry.
She stopped.
No more talking, just looking at me, the eyes turn red.
She choked, “What?”
I said, “Mom. I’m sorry.
And she smiled, and she begged, “Will you scream again?” I’m sorry.
I nod my head.
“Mom. I’m sorry.
Note.
About why I woke up.
Kiki says my brain is very active, and it’s related to a strong personal sense of survival.
But the other night I dreamt of a baby-mother who said that the desire for life came not from me, but from my mother.
She said, “Death is like a door. You want to go over there, you have to cut your head off. But you can’t get past your mother’s. I’m sorry.
Later, my body gradually improved. Two months later, it was almost healed.
My mom moved back home and said she couldn’t live without a dog. But my phone calls were seven times more numerous than before, once a week, after I lived with Kiki.
To be precise, she called Kiki, just asking me about my condition at the beginning of every phone call.
And the third sentence was, “Come on, give Kiki back the phone.” I’m sorry.
Then two women started talking about art, makeup, skin protection, etc.
And from time to time, there’s something to talk about.
My mom said, “You know what grade Van’s last bed wetter was?”
Kiki: What grade is it? I’m sorry.
My mother said, “Did I say primary school? #Placed: YX11dz1o1Ma
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
