Concu
bine Dong E: The man
I want to marry is the younger brother of my sweetheart. On the wedding day
, it rained heavily in Beijing. A pair of red lanterns were picked up under the eaves in front of the
mansion, and the dazzling red happy characters were pasted on the windows, as red as blood.
I’m not happy at all.
The maid Chunxiu stood in front of the bronze mirror and put on the phoenix crown for me. I felt a thousand grievances and sorrows in my heart. I cried all night yesterday, and my eyes were red and swollen like walnuts.
When Chunxiu saw me like this, she said, “Master, don’t cry. If you cry again, the makeup on your face will be blurred again.”
She did not say that it was all right, but when she said that I was hiding tears, she wanted to burst out.
“Good master, when you cry, Chunxiu wants to cry too.”
I tried to stop my tears. Today is my big day. Never has a bride cried so miserably when she got married.
I looked at the person in the bronze mirror. Her eyebrows were not painted but Dai, her lips were not dyed but red, and her graceful figure was wearing a phoenix crown, but she was not married to her ideal husband. Before I
got into the sedan chair, Ama looked at me with red eyes and no joy on her face. “Waner, I know you’re suffering, but this is the marriage that Empress Dowager Zhuang has decided on today, and Ama can’t help it.”
“I know.” I said it again. The sound of firecrackers sounded
outside.
Chunxiu put a red handkerchief over my head and said, “Master, it’s time for us to get into the bridal sedan chair.”
Ama released my hand, turned around and said, “Go, go.”
Chunxiu helped me walk out of the door. I wanted to break away from her hand, tear off the red veil on my head, and throw myself into my Ama’s arms and say I don’t want to marry, but I didn’t have the courage.
Heaven’s grace is vast, and the emperor’s order is hard to disobey.
Besides, I am only the legitimate daughter of a second-grade official.
I sat in the sedan chair and wanted to look back at our Dong’e Mansion.
But I, Ama, said that when the bride went out of the house, she could not turn back according to the rules, and it was unlucky to turn back. Sitting in the sedan chair,
I felt helpless. The sedan-chair bearers lifted the sedan chair up and down, and my heart rose and fell with it. Two lines of tears fell from my face like broken beads.
I’m going to marry Bogor, the 11th son of Emperor Taizong of the Qing Dynasty, but I’m thinking of someone else. My
name is Dong E and Wu Yunzhu. I was born in the fourth year of Chongde.
Ama was a member of the Zhengbai Banner of Manchuria under the account of Dourgen. But my mother is a Han, so I’m half Han. When
I was five years old, I asked my teacher to give me a Han name. “Gege is gentle and virtuous,” said
the gentleman. “Why don’t you use the word” like “?”
He reached out from the table and picked up the wolf’s hair pen covered with thick ink, dropped it on the rice paper and wrote his name to me.
“As if.”
I like the name. In the first year
of Shunzhi, I came to the capital with Ama from the south of the Yangtze River.
In the seventh month after I came to the capital, my mother passed away, and then I had a serious illness and lay in bed for more than a month.
I said to Ama, “I’m afraid I’m going to die with my mother.” In front of my bed
, Ama was in such a hurry that she first invited the imperial physician to feel the pulse, and then invited the shaman to dance.
But not only did my condition show no signs of improvement, but in the winter, I became more ill and began to cough up blood in my mouth.
Near the cold winter, a wandering monk came from outside the door. The monk, who calls himself Master Kuanshou, is currently the abbot of Guangji Temple.
He was dressed in shabby cotton-padded clothes, and although he was old, he was in good spirits.
Master Kuan Shou put his fingers on my wrists. After a moment, he stood up, clasped his palms together, and said with a smile, “If I can’t breathe, where can I settle down?”
Ama quickly asked, “My daughter, does the master have a good prescription for this disease?”
“Her illness is in her heart, not in her body.”
After that, I set up an Ashram in the courtyard of my house. It was snowing outside. The monk sat cross-legged on the futon cushion and recited the curse of dispelling disasters.
Three days later, my condition became mild and I was able to get out of bed and walk.
Ama took me to Guangji Temple to make a vow.
Kuan Shou said, “This woman is so affectionate that she can’t live long. I can only save her for a while, but I can’t save her for a lifetime.”. If you want her to live long, you want her to live in the temple.
“Is there no other way?” How
can Ama give up my blue lamp and ancient Buddha to accompany me in this life.
Kuan Shou clasped his palms together and said, “Then let her be a layman in the temple for half a year, which will give her ten more years of life.” In the winter of this
year, I took my maid Chunxiu to live in Guangji Temple and became a female householder who practiced merit in the temple. Play the piano, read books, eat fast and worship Buddha every day.
Sitting in front of the window, I copied the Prajnaparamita Heart Sutra with a hairpin.
Master Kuanshou said, I am sentimental, emotional and too infatuated. Living in the temple is to sharpen my mind.
But I never thought that fate had set a trap here, waiting quietly for my lamb to be slaughtered to enter the net. In the
early spring, there was a heavy snow in the capital.
Snowflakes are as big as buckets, which I have never seen in the south of the Yangtze River.
Chunxiu ran in from outside the house with two sweet potatoes in her arms. She said, “Master, I have just baked this in the oven. Will you eat it?”
I shook my head and asked her to fetch my Yaoqin. “The weather is so cold that my fingers are stiff,”
said Chunxiu. “Why should my master play the lute?” As
she muttered, she went to the house to fetch Yao Qin. I opened the case and put it on the table in front of me. The wind and snow were blowing outside, and the stove in the warm pavilion was burning vigorously.
I asked her, “Chunsu, what do you want to hear?”
Chunxiu thought for a moment and said, “Just listen to that, thump.”
I said, “It’s called’High Mountains and Flowing Water. ‘”
Chunxiu took a bite of the sweet potato in her hand and giggled at me.
“Yes, it’s the’high mountains and flowing water. ‘” The
burnt skin of the sweet potato rubbed against the corners of her mouth like a moustache. I wiped the dust off her chin with a handkerchief and laughed at her, saying, “You must be a greedy person in your life.”
Ten fingers on the strings, hook, pick, wipe, hit.
Clank harp sound, such as weeping, such as complaint, such as resentment, such as admiration.
Like the sweet-scented osmanthus in the quiet spring mountain at night, like the birdsong in the mountain stream disturbed by the moonrise.
The delicate fingers plucked back and forth on the strings.
I don’t know, now there is a man standing under the wall outside the warm pavilion, listening to the piano crazily. He forgot himself and ignored the snow all over his body.
Curl the bullet to a high place, and my index finger exerts a little force. The string broke with a
snap, and the music came to an abrupt end. A clear and hearty voice rang out from outside the
house: “Emei is like Mount Tai, and Yangyang is like a river.” With
that, a handsome Manchu boy turned out from the corner.
He looked at me with starry eyes and said, “I thought that Yu Bo-ya had passed away, and that the’high mountains and flowing water ‘had long since become extinct. I never thought that in this ancient temple, you could still hear such wonderful music.” “Even if you are Zhong Ziqi, I’m not Yu Boya,”
I said with a smile.
He stood in the wind and snow, and the north wind flushed his cheeks.
Wearing a brocade hat and a mink fur coat, he stood under the eaves of the porch outside the house, followed by three or four attendants who looked like bookboys. The dress of the whole body looks like the style of a rich boy.
I said, “It’s cold outside the door. If you don’t want to leave, you can come in and get warm.”
He shook off the snow and strode into the house. “The housewife is good at playing the lute,” she
said, “but the strings are broken. Today I can only listen to half of the music.”
I said, “As the saying goes, it’s hard to find a bosom friend through the ages. Now that you know what you like, I’ll finish playing the remaining half of the song for you the next time I fix it.”
He walked up to me and bent over to look at my Yaoqin. Then he said with a smile, “This lute doesn’t match the householder’s music. I happen to have a good lute in my house. I’ll give it to the householder next time.”
Three days later, he did come with a guqin.
The lute is three feet long, with a pattern on the belly of a python. The whole body is dark, and the character “Qiu Bo” is written in official script on the part of the lute in the Dragon Pool.
“Is this the wink of the four great guqin of Linglan?”
He nodded slightly and said, “Exactly. Do you like it?”
I said, “Leer is a famous lute in the world, and naturally I like it.”
“If you like it, I’ll give it to you. I promised to give the householder a good lute.”
I put the instrument away and returned it to him in a box, saying, “Your gift is too heavy for me to accept.”
Don’t you hear that a good horse is matched with a hero, and a sword is given to a strong man. No matter how expensive a musical instrument is, it is dead after all. It was made for human use. If it is hidden in a box and covered with dust, it is a real waste of natural resources.
“No merit, no reward. You’d better take it back.”
Seeing my repeated attempts to shirk, he continued, “I have the right to leave it with you for the time being.”
I loved this guqin so much that I stopped evading it.
After that, he came every once in a while.
First listening to music, then discussing law, and then poetry and songs.
As a result, as time went on, he and I gradually became close friends who talked about everything. He was Frank with himself without reservation, but he always avoided talking about his family background.
Once I asked him by accident, and he laughed and said, “You see, it’s not very good for us to be like this.”
He is like the wind passing through the hall, coming and going at will. I can only guess that he may be the son of a rich family who sells the piano in the capital. Aft knowing him for two month, I still don’t know his name.
He didn’t want to say, and I stopped asking.
I call him Childe, and he calls me householder.
I grew to like the feeling that two people talked about everything, but knew nothing about each other. He said, or maybe it’s because we don’t know anything about each other that we can talk about everything.
I laugh, maybe. In the late spring of the seventh year of the reign of
Emperor Shunzhi, I finally fulfilled my merits and virtues in Guangji Temple.
When Ama sent someone to pick me up, I delayed for a few days.
Because he hasn’t been here for a few days, I can’t pay him back. Finally, on the last day I was leaving, he suddenly appeared on the lake in front of my house.
I told him that I had made great achievements in Guangji Temple. If you come back later, I’m afraid I can’t play music for you. Outside
the Buddhist gate, the servants in the Dong’e Mansion had prepared a carriage to take me back. The evening drum on the Bell Tower struck the third time, and it was time to say goodbye.
I asked Chun-soo to take it out and return it to him.
He said, “I came to the householder to listen to music for two months, and this harp is a mortgage for me to listen to music these days.”
If I don’t comply, he won’t accept.
I insisted, but he refused.
I said, “I dare to ask you where you live in the capital.”. I will certainly come to thank you some day. “The capital is so small,”
he said with a smile. “I’m sure we’ll meet again.”
“Will it?”
“I’m sure I will.”
I got into the carriage with my Chuckleberry in my arms. Before I left, I looked back at him again. He waved to me.
At that time, I did not find a definite fact. My heart has already been stolen by him, and I haven’t known his name yet. When I returned home
from Guangji Temple, my body had recovered.
But my heart is empty, and I always feel that something is missing. I want to pay my mind to Yao Qin, but I know that the sound is less, and no one listens to the broken strings.
I asked Chunxiu to inquire about the whereabouts of this young man. She searched thirteen piano shops in the capital, but no one had ever seen this young man.
I missed him more and more until one day I woke up from my sleep and suddenly thought that maybe I would never see him again. This is the 49th day that I haven’t seen him. Unconsciously, I feel sad in my heart. It was not
until this time that I gradually realized that my heart could not let go of the teenager who once stood in the wind and snow and listened to me playing the piano.
The next day, Ama asked me to watch polo, but I was not interested at all.
I told Ama that I was not feeling well. “This is an oral order from the emperor,”
said Ama.
I don’t know why the good saint of the present day asked us to go to the polo. There are two chairs in the middle of the stands of the
polo field. One of
them was a lady with elegant appearance and dignified appearance. I know that this is the Empress Dowager Zhuang who straightened up the court with Dourgen after the death of the late emperor. Not long after I
came to the capital, I went to Guangji Temple as a layman, so this is the first time I saw her.
Dourgen was honored as the emperor’s uncle before his death. Everyone in the court knew that Emperor Shunzhi was just a puppet. The real rulers of the Qing Dynasty were Dourgen and Empress Dowager Zhuang. There were
even rumors in the marketplace that Dourgen had climbed into the queen mother’s bed long after the death of the late emperor. Empress Dowager
Zhuang had an empty chair beside her, the back of which was carved into the shape of a dragon. This should be the seat of the present emperor.
Ama showed me the batsman in the middle of the Polo Grounds, wearing a yellow protective equipment and a black helmet.
He is the present emperor, Aisin Gioro Fulin.
I asked, pointing to another teenager who was grabbing the ball from Fulin.
“Who is this man fighting for the ball with the emperor?” “This is Bogor, the 11th son of Emperor Taizong,”
said Ama. More than
a dozen horses galloped in the stadium.
Fulin holds the reins in his left hand and swings the batting club in his right hand. Every time he scores a goal, he is always proud and raises the batting club to accept the cheers of the audience.
I thought to myself, after all, the emperor was still a teenager, and when he won the ball, he was on cloud nine. At the end of the
match, the score between the two sides was the same, and only the last ball could decide the victory or defeat. Fulin held the pole to hit the ball, and when he was approaching the opponent’s goal, Bogor jumped from the side to seize it. The
two horses brushed against each other, and with a splash, Fulin fell off his horse.
Staying outside the court, the doctor rushed into the stadium to check the emperor’s injuries.
Fulin stood up and patted the dust on his body. “I’m all right,” he said. “Get back.”
He took off his helmet, and when I saw his face, I panicked.
It turned out that today’s Emperor Fulin was the young man who was listening to the piano music in Guangji Temple. I should have thought that apart from the royal family, there is no one in the world who can give gifts so generously. Empress Dow
ager Chuang rose from her chair and said to the attendant who was keeping score off the court, “This game is a tie. Clean up the court. It’s time for the emperor to go back to the palace for a banquet.”
Fulin stood below and shouted, “Mother, this game is not over yet.”
He moved his legs and feet to indicate that it was only a fall and that it was not a serious problem. “Your Majesty is a man of gold,” said Empress Dowager
Zhuang. “It’s so dangerous to play polo. If you make a mistake, how can I explain it to my ancestors?” “Brother,”
said Bogor, “why don’t we play another day?”
Fulin snorted and said in a fit of pique, “No more playing, no more playing, no more playing.” As soon as
he had finished, the Empress Dowager Chuang decreed, “From now on, the whole country will be forbidden to hold polo matches, and those who disobey the order will be severely punished.” “Mother,”
said Fulin, “that’s just an angry remark from my son. You know I like playing polo best.” “Your Majesty,” said Empress Dow
ager Chuang, “is a man of the Ninth Five-Year Plan. All you say is golden words. How can you go back on your word?”
“Now that the situation in the world is not stable, I hope Your Majesty will put more thought into the country.”
Fulin sat back on the throne angrily.
He saw me in the crowd, and his angry face opened in an instant.
He smiled at me, and I bowed my head sheepishly. “Why does the emperor know you?” Asked Ama.
I nodded and told Ama everything about Guangji Temple. “Meng Guqing, the daughter of Wu Keshan, came to the capital a few months ago,”
said Ama. “Your Majesty is about to get married. You’d better stay away from him in the future.”
I said, “I know. I don’t dare to think about it.”
The Qing Dynasty could not lay down such a large country without the power of the Mongolian Horqin tribe. Emperor Taiji married three princesses of Horqin in succession.
Today’s queen mother big jade son, it is from Horqin Borjit,
now Jiangshan initial, the foundation of the court is still unstable, but also can not do without the support of the Mongolian Horqin tribal forces. On the day
Meng Guqing entered the capital, I had the honor to meet her. She is a typical Mongolian beauty, big eyes, high nose, skin like congealed fat, slender figure, if I were the emperor, I would like her. As the niece of Empress Dowager Zhuang,
she has not yet officially married into the royal family, but everyone knows that as Gege of Horqin, she will definitely be in charge of the palace in the future.
This is her destiny.
The
four palaces feast delicacies like treasures, and the sound of pushing a cup for a change is endless.
I had stayed in the temple for a long time, but I felt a little uncomfortable in the face of this lively scene. At a loss, I had to find a way to breathe in front of the temple. Outside the
corridor, the night is dark and the evening breeze is leisurely.
It is a rare quiet that belongs to me alone, with fluorescent spots in the flowers.
I reached into it to catch the fireflies circling around the flowers.
“Got you.” He
stretched out his hand, but there was nothing.
I saw a firefly standing still on the leaf, holding its breath and pouncing on it. With too much
force, I tripped over the stone under my feet. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a familiar figure behind the flowers. I bumped into his arms.
“As if.”
I looked up at the man, whose familiar face seemed to have a smile that could not be concealed.
It is the present emperor, Fulin.
“I told you we would meet again.”
I hurriedly stepped forward and saluted, saying, “I deserve to die. I bumped into Your Majesty.”
He stretched out his hand and said, “As if, you don’t have to do this.”
I took half a step back unconsciously. “You used to talk to me about everything at the Kuangchi Temple,”
said Fulin. “How come now you’re separated?”
I bowed my head. “Because you are the present emperor.”
I knew that once I knew who I was, you wouldn’t be close to me anymore. Although I am the emperor of the Qing Dynasty, I am just a slave of the scepter behind my back. I am also a poor person, no one around me to speak, and the repressed emotions in my heart can not be said. It was not easy to find a bosom friend, but now he is so separated from me.
I am not myself.
Growing up in Manchu, but born as Han people, is an alien in the eyes of all people. Since childhood, no one is willing to talk to me. Fulin is the first person to approach me.
He said, “The happiest time in my life was when I met you at Guangji Temple. We talked about everything and had no taboos.”. I can take off my heavy shackles and breathe out.
His palm released my arm and tried to reach out and hold my hand.
I shrank back like lightning.
“Your Majesty is about to get married. This cannot be the case.”
“I don’t like Meng Guqing at all. This marriage was settled by my mother and Dorgon. I hate everything they arranged for me. Do you know why I’ve been dragging my feet on marrying Meng Guqing?”
“Because of you, as if.”
I said, “Thank you, Your Majesty, for your love. My position is humble.” “Don’t use your identity as a barrier between you and me,”
he said. “I don’t care. Frankly, as if, I like you.
Fulin is bold and unrestrained in love.
I could feel his emotions burning like a flame. His love is so fierce that I can’t stop myself from falling in love. I
like him. I like the way he looks like a 14-year-old boy. When he speaks, his eyebrows are raised and his heart is always burning with a fire.
Dare to love and hate.
He rushed over and took my hand again.
“I don’t believe it. You don’t like me at all.”
I smiled and said, “Of course I like it.”
He said, “As if, I will ask my mother to marry you. I will be the emperor, and you will be the queen.”
I let him hold my hand, no words, in fact, already secretly promised.
The heart is too happy to speak. After
that, I haven’t seen Fulin for a long time.
At that time, I was young and did not understand that for the royal family, marriage was a tool to maintain power.
Soon after, news came from the palace that Fulin was going to hold a wedding ceremony with Meng Guqing. Soon after the marriage, Fulin made Meng Guqing empress.
Whether it is queen mother Zhuang big jade son, or Meng Guqing, they were born in Horqin Gege, born is destined to be the queen’s life.
But I don’t know what my destiny is. One day
in September, when I came back from the market, the servants all held their breath. I asked them what was wrong.
A servant girl told me that someone had come to the palace, and I thought it would be Fulin.
It turned out to be Empress Dowager Zhuang’s personal maid, Su Mo’er. When she
saw me, she said, “You are indeed a beautiful person. No wonder the emperor likes you.”
Su Moer came this time for no other reason than my marriage. She took out the imperial edict and passed it on to the queen mother, saying that she would betroth me to Bogor, the eleventh son of the emperor. Betrothed
my clan sister to Fulin.
At that moment, my heart was like swallowing a thousand needles. I asked Su Moer, is not wrong, Fulin said to marry me, not my sister.
Sumer asked me, “Do you like the present emperor?”
I lowered my head and dared not admit it.
“It’s best not to like it.” She laughed and said, “Do you know what imperial love is?”? The emperor’s heart should be filled with rivers and mountains, even if he once said that he liked you, it was just a joke. The Son of Heaven is young and romantic. You are just a little girl who has been deceived.
I nodded. I said I know.
I know who in the world can get the love in his mind. How many people can marry their dream lover. Most people’s love ends in tragedy.
Now I am married, but now the queen mother Zhuang, this is the most powerful person in the empire.
I don’t know if Fulin knew the news, or if he had known it for a long time. The imperial edict was clearly stamped with his seal.
Perhaps, as Su Moer said, I am just a little girl who has been cheated. How heavy the
rivers and mountains are, how light my love is.
I stretched out my trembling hands and took the imperial edict. I fell on the ground and said, “Thank you, Lord Long.” In the tenth year
of Shunzhi, my sister married the present emperor, and I married Bogor with grief, indignation and despair. On the day of
marriage, the rain in the sky was like pearls.
I stepped out of the bridal sedan chair, and the attendant hurriedly held up the big umbrella. Under the watchful eyes of hundreds of people, I walked to Bogor step by step, feeling that the road under my feet was so difficult that I could hardly stand without Chunxiu holding my arm. “The bride steps over the brazier,” said
the master of ceremonies.
I raised my right leg.
After entering this door, there is no turning back.
I stood beside the bridegroom, and the witness shouted above.
“Worship heaven and earth.”
I bowed down and wondered if there would be any possible accidents to stop the wedding. But the reality is that apart from a rain in the middle of the day, the wedding went smoothly. After
three obediences, I will be the wife of Bogor. There is no possibility of being together with the person you like in your life.
The crowd surrounded me and sent me to the bridal chamber. At that moment, my heart was dead.
Goodbye, Fulin. We are destined for each other
in this life.
I sat in the room and waited nervously for the night to come.
That night, Bogor rushed into the wedding room reeking of alcohol. He sat beside me and lifted my veil.
It was supposed to be our wedding day, but what Bogor saw was a crying face with makeup.
His cheeks were flushed, his features were beautiful, and he looked like Fulin.
So I couldn’t help crying again.
Bogor said softly, “Just like, I know you may not be used to it just now. It doesn’t matter. We have plenty of time in the future.”
I don’t know how to reply to him, just silence.
Bogor also said, “I can’t help drinking a few more cups today. Will you be unhappy if you smell of alcohol?”
I still didn’t reply to him.
He took the pillow and the bedding from the bed.
“Why don’t I go and sleep in my study tonight?”
I took him by the hand and said, “On the wedding night, there is no reason for a wife to drive her husband out of the bridal chamber.”. It will be a matter of ridicule if it gets out.
He spread the mat on the floor and said, “Then I will sleep on the floor.”
I nodded. “Mmm.”
Bogor lay on the mat and talked to me to ease the awkward atmosphere between us. After a long day at the
wedding, I said, “I’m a little tired.”
Bogor said, “Oh,” before he shut up. He got up and blew out the candle. “Go to sleep,” he said. “Tomorrow, everything will be all right.”
Will it be all right? I don’t know. The moonlight
outside the window shone down on Bogor’s young face.
I have a bad habit. If I change to a strange place, I will not be able to sleep.
So on the wedding night, I didn’t sleep all night. After
getting married, Bogor was very kind to me.
He invited more than ten maids for me, and I said no, it was enough to have Chunxiu alone.
We have been respecting each other for a long time. He gave me whatever I wanted and bought me whatever I liked. Late
one night, Bogor came home drunk from the outside.
A group of servants sent him back from the outside, and he could not walk.
I put him on the bed and put a hot towel on his forehead. When he was
half drunk, he said, “Is there any more wine?”? Let’s keep drinking!
I brought him a cup of tea and handed it to him to sober him up.
“Where am I?”
“Home.” I said, “Lie on the bed.” The wine churned in his
stomach, causing him to vomit, and Bogor looked ugly.
I said, “Why do you drink so much wine when you have nothing to do? It’s uncomfortable and harmful.”
He said, “As if, are you feeling sorry for me?”
I turned my back and said, “I’ll get you some hot water.”
He suddenly took me by the hand and said, “Don’t go, just like that.”
Then he got up and held me in his arms.
“Like, I like you.”
I tried to get out of his arms, but he held on to me.
He knew I was resisting him, but he held me tighter and tighter.
“Like, is your heart made of iron? Why can’t I keep warm?”
“Bogor, you’re drunk.”
“Tell me what I can do to get your heart.”
“Bogor, let me go first.”
Bogor took no notice of what I said. He said, “Don’t always think about running away. You have married me. You are now my Bogor’s wife.”
He finished and began to take off my coat while he was drunk.
“Today I want to see who you have in your heart.”
I struggled, “Bogor, don’t do this.” Completely ignoring my feelings,
he took off my clothes one by one with great strength in his hands and rudeness like a wild animal.
I’m married to Bogor, and I don’t know what I’m doing with this body.
I gave up resistance, and two lines of tears spilled from the corners of my eyes.
Bogor saw me like this and stopped for a moment.
He sobered up and covered my body with a quilt.
“I’m sorry, Wanru, but I went too far today.”
I did not speak, and he shed tears.
“But I like you too much.”
I met Fulin again in the autumn of the tenth year of Shunzhi.
At that time, my clan sister, because she gave birth to the second prince Fuquan, was given the title of Concubine Ning.
According to the rules of the Manchu, the wife was ordered to enter the palace to serve the empresses and concubines. As the eleventh son of the emperor, Dafujin of Bogor, and the elder sister of the imperial concubine Ning, the woman who served her naturally fell on my head.
I have been wandering with my father since childhood, and I don’t have much contact with my clan sister, but after all, I have the blood of Dong E’s family in my body, and I am closer than others. The
two of us have been somewhat similar since we were young. When we were at home, the elders all said that she was a little girl. She was lying on her bed in
the Xianfu Palace. When she saw me coming, she said, “Sister, you’re here.”
I took her by the hand and said, “I haven’t seen you for so many days. How is your sister?” “Although I was only a little Fujin when I entered the palace,” said Concu
bine Ning, “the emperor treated me well.”
I said, “That’s all right. I’m afraid my sister will be wronged in the palace.” Concu
bine Ning said, “The emperor has treated me well, but I am still in the light of my sister. If I didn’t look a little like my sister, I would have been left out in the cold like the empress. How could I have a chance to sleep with her?”
I said, “Sister, don’t talk nonsense. He is the emperor and I am his sister-in-law.”
“Sister, you don’t know. When the emperor comes to me, whatever he says is about you. I’m not a fool. How can I not see that he has you in his heart?”. The queen mother originally asked me to enter the palace for you. She thought that by finding someone who looked like her Majesty could forget you, but I know he hasn’t forgotten you. As
he spoke, Fulin came in from the outside. “Look, sister,” said Concu
bine Ning with a smile, “it’s the talk of the devil.” When it was getting dark in the
afternoon, I came out of Xianfu Palace to go back to the house.
Fulin found me in the Imperial Garden. All the maids and servants in my sister’s room were there just now. I hardly said anything except to say hello to him.
He caught up with him at the moment. There was no one around here. Being alone with men and women, it was hard to avoid being criticized.
It’s not good for anyone to make trouble.
So I turned to go, and Fulin took my arm, and he said, “Just like, don’t you want to stay with me a little longer?”
I said, “Your Majesty, I am already the wife of Bogor. This is not proper.”. It’s not good for anyone to be seen by outsiders and to be chewed on. “Say what you like,”
cried Fulin. “I like you, even if you are Bogor’s wife.”
I said, “Your Majesty, even if you are not afraid of being gossiped about, you should think about me. When this kind of thing gets out, it will be me who will be gossiped about.”
He let go of my arm and looked angry.
I hate my mother. She married you to Bogor. I hate her. First Dorgon, then my mother. They have not taken away my throne, but they have taken away my most precious thing.
We can’t be together. Whose fault is it? Is it Empress Dowager Zhuang. I don’t think so. It’s the kingship of the Qing Dynasty. In order to marry my mother
, Ama went against the power of Manchu Dynasty and almost lost her head. In the end, Dourgen proposed a compromise and placed my mother outside Dong E’s mansion.
Until her death, she had never entered the gate of Dong E Mansion. Although I am a member of the Dong E Mansion, I cannot enter the Manchurian Zhengbai Banner.
Fulin, as the son of heaven, is naturally the model of the people in the world. I don’t know how many tiny loves have been crushed by the gears of the
Empire.
If you want to blame, blame Fu Lin for being born in the imperial family, and blame me for having half Han blood.
I said, “In this life, you and I are destined for each other. In the next life, we will be an ordinary couple. You plough the fields and I weave cloth. You practice calligraphy and I tune the piano.”
Fulin said, “The next life is a lie. I do not ask for an afterlife, but for this life.”
I said, “But I am already the wife of your brother.” Empress Dow
ager Zhuang used this move really well, that is, no matter how capricious Fulin is, even if Fulin acts recklessly, even if he is the emperor of the Qing Dynasty, he can’t break the taboo wall between us that we can never cross. During the period of
taking care of my sister, I was satisfied to talk to Fulin every day.
Seeing him is what I look forward to most every day, and that kind of mood is the same as when I was waiting for him with my Chuckle in my arms. The second time
I saw Empress Dowager Zhuang was in the promenade by the lake. That day when I passed by the corridor, Empress Dowager Zhuang and her maid Su Moer were watching fish by the lake.
I went up to pay my respects to the queen mother.
She asked me to raise my head, and I slowly looked up. She looked at me and said something that Su Moer had said.
“You are indeed a beautiful person. No wonder Fulin likes you.”
She asked me, “Is Bogor treating you well?”
I said, “He has been very kind to me.” “I’ve watched Bogor grow up, too,” said Empress Dow
ager Chuang. “He always has a gentle temper and loves people. He’s quite compatible with you.”
I said, “Yes, he’s very nice.”
If I hadn’t met Fulin first, I might have fallen in love with Bogor, but love sometimes comes first.
Fulin walked into my heart first, and I couldn’t move away from others. I know it’s not fair to Bogor. As his wife, I have someone else in my heart.
But my heart is not like my mouth. I can say that I don’t like Fulin, but my heart can’t accept this false lie.
I have been a wife in the palace for more than three months.
In the past three months, Fulin has been running to Xianfu Palace every day. This naturally aroused the dissatisfaction of others, the most dissatisfied of which was the empress, Meng Guqing.
One day she ran to the Xianfu Palace, where I was taking medicine for my sister. Although she had given birth to a child for several months, she had been very weak. When
the empress entered the palace, I saluted her.
Meng Guqing asked, “Who are you?”
I replied, “Tell the empress that I am Wu Yunzhu, the elder sister of Concubine Ning.” “So you are Wu Yunzhu, the southern barbarian,” said
Meng Guqing angrily. “It is you who have charmed the emperor into running to the Xianfu Palace every day.”
I said, “Legs are on the emperor. I don’t care where he runs. I just do my job.”
“How dare you talk back, you little prick!”
“Empress, Wu Yunzhu is Bogor’s wife anyway. You can’t say that about her.”
“I’m the queen. That’s what I said. What’s wrong with her? Why don’t you come down from the bed to salute when you see the queen?”
“Empress, Concubine Ning is sick and can’t get out of bed.”
“Did I ask you to speak?”
Meng Guqing forced Concubine Ning to get out of bed and salute her. I knelt down in front of her and said, “Empress, it’s all my fault. Don’t embarrass my sister.”
Meng Guqing was so unrelenting that Ning had to get out of bed to salute her.
I was afraid that the cold on the ground would make her worse, so I took a cushion and put it under her knee.
“You two have a sisterhood.” She kicked the mat away.
“Stay on your knees, both of you.”
After kneeling for a while, Ning’s body gradually failed to support her, and I came forward to help her get up. “You, you mustn’t help her!” Cried
Meng Guqing.
I ignored her and helped her to the bed.
“How dare you disobey my orders.”
She stretched out her hand to hit me, and before her hand fell into the air, she was grabbed by Fulin, who suddenly appeared.
“Meng Ku-ching, stop it!”
Meng Guqing’s delicate arm was grasped by Fulin, which made her feel painful.
“You love her, don’t you?”
Fulin said, “You only look like a shrew. You don’t look like an empress at all.”
Meng Ku-ching scolded, “You like this little loafer, and you love her dearly, don’t you?”
Fulin did not speak and helped me up from the ground. Meng Guqing rushed over, pushed Fulin away, and reached out to hit me.
“You are a fox spirit, and you will seduce others.”
Fulin stretched out his hand to give Meng Guqing a slap, and a red palm print appeared on her face.
“I won’t allow you to say that about her.”
Meng Guqing covered his burning face and tears flowed freely.
“Fulin, you beat me, but you beat me for her. I’m going to tell my aunt.” “Go, go,”
cried Fulin! Go and complain to your mother, and tell her that I will not only beat you, but also destroy you.
Meng Guqing covered his face and ran away from Xianfu Palace crying. On the day of the
Sixth
Mid-Autumn Festival, after a dinner party, Empress Dowager Zhuang invited the nobles, concubines and Gege in the palace to Imperial Garden to enjoy the moon. Everyone
made mooncakes for Empress Dowager Zhuang. The Empress Dowager tasted the mooncakes made by all the people, but she picked mine. “This is a nice mooncake. Who made it?”
She asked Su Mo-er, the maid at her side. “This is made by Wu Yunzhu, the Great Fujin of Bogor,” said
Su Moer.
“Reward.”
The Empress Dowager beckoned me to her. She asked me, “Wu Yunzhu, you are really clever and skillful. Who did you learn this craft from?”
I said, “When my mother was alive, she personally taught me how to make some snacks.”
She smiled and said to me, “That’s no wonder. We Manchu girls don’t have such skills.”
I said, “Empress Dowager, if you like it, I’ll make more and send it to the palace next time.” Meng Guqing, the queen
on one side, looked unhappy when she heard this. She took out a piece of moon cake from the food box and said, “Auntie, please try mine again.” The Empress Dow
ager Chuang took a sip and said, “You’re not as good as Wu Yunzhu.”
Meng Guqing muttered in a low voice, “The southern barbarians will make people happy.” The queen mother was hard of hearing, but I heard it.
But she is the queen, and I can’t say much. After
a while, Empress Dowager Zhuang slowly lowered her eyes. Sumer winked at us, and we closed our mouths and got up to leave. As soon as
I took a step, I heard Empress Dowager Chuang say, “Don’t go yet, Wu Yunzhu. I have two words to say to you.” When
Meng Guqing heard this, he also stopped. The queen mother said, “Let the others retire for the time being.” Only
then did she walk out of the pavilion sullenly.
The queen mother asked me to stay without permission, and I didn’t know what was going on. He sat there, not daring to say a word more, for fear of losing his sense of propriety. After
a long time, the queen mother asked me, “Do you hate me, Wu Yunzhu?”
I don’t know if it was because Fulin beat Meng Guqing a few days ago that the superior Empress Dowager Zhuang asked such a question.
I quickly knelt down and said, “If Wu Yunzhu has done anything wrong, please ask the queen mother to punish her.”
The Empress Dowager asked Su Moer to help me up. She said, “Today I’m not talking to you as the Empress Dowager. I’m just talking to you from the bottom of my heart.”
Su Moer helped me up and sat beside the Empress Dowager. I said, “It’s too late for me to respect you. How can I hate you?” Empress Dowager
Zhuang said, “Your marriage was decided by me. Fulin and Meng Guqing were about to get married, but he insisted on marrying you. For your sake, he said he didn’t want to accept Meng Guqing as his concubine. He has been dragging on this marriage.”. Although Dorgon was dead at that time, his power was controlled by his brother Azig. Azig had been trying to usurp the throne for a long time. If he seized the excuse to rise up at this time, the throne of Fulin would be unstable. So I secretly betrothed you to Bogor without telling Your Majesty.
I know Fulin’s temper. I’ve been indulgent since I was a child. In order to cut off his idea, he came up with this bad plan. As you know, our ancestors have long established the ancestral precept of no intermarriage between Manchu and Han. I know Fulin has feelings for you, you are interested in Fulin, but who let you have the blood of the Han people. You may blame me, an old woman, for not being friendly.
I shook my head and said, “As if I knew that the Empress Dowager was thinking about the future of the Qing Dynasty, and that the emperor should have given priority to the country.”. It’s a wise choice, just like how you can hate the queen mother.
She stretched out her hand, took me by the hand, and suddenly said, “You may have heard rumors about my relationship with Dorgon.”
I shook my head and said, “No, there is no such thing.” Empress Dowager
Zhuang said, “Don’t think that I don’t know these rumors outside the palace. Some of these rumors are true.”
I didn’t expect that the queen mother would suddenly say so, and I didn’t dare to speak for a moment.
The Empress Dowager continued, Before I married the late emperor, I really liked Dorgon. That was the first time I met him on the prairie. He was young at that time, and he was full of manliness. I fell in love with him the first time I met him.
But what can you do if you fall in love with him? Our Horqin tribe, Gege of the Borjit clan, is going to marry the emperor. I entered the palace when I was 13 years old. At that time, my aunt was the first Borgit to marry into the palace. Unfortunately, she never gave birth to a son, so she married me. As a result, I was unable to give birth to a son for the late emperor, and later even my sister, who became a widow after marriage, was married off.
If I hadn’t given birth to Fulin, I don’t know how many Borgit girls I would have married. The rivers and mountains of the Qing Dynasty were conquered by Horqin and Manchu people. Therefore, the throne must be of the blood of these two tribes, otherwise it will easily cause unrest.
“You may feel wronged, but you’re not the only one who has ruined your love in order to secure your political foundation.”
I bowed my head and said, “Empress Dowager, Wu Yunzhu understands.”
The queen mother said, “You are a good boy, that’s why I’m telling you this.”. This is our fate as a royal family. We are all born to maintain the stability of the regime, and we have to bear more pain than ordinary people.
The queen mother said, I want to shed tears, but still forced to hold back, I can not let her see that I have not given up on Fulin.
The Empress Dowager said, “Just like you, I really like you. Your character is like water, but you are very much like my sister who died long ago.”. In fact, it is a good thing for you not to enter the palace. It took me more than 30 years to get to where I am today. I know very well that a person of your character is not at all fit to live in a harem.
I nodded and said yes.
“You’ve been walking around the palace a lot lately, and I’ve heard that the emperor and you are getting closer and closer.”
I said, “The emperor and I have not done anything out of line.” “I trust you,” said Empress Dowager
Zhuang, “but I don’t trust Fulin. He is young and impetuous in doing things. If you go back today, don’t come back to the palace again, so as not to create complications.
I asked Empress Dowager Zhuang to pay my respects. I said, “Empress Dowager, please take care of yourself. Wu Yunzhu will not be able to come to honor you again.”
The queen mother waved her hand and said, “Go, go, I’m tired.”. I want to rest for a while.
Just out of the Imperial Garden, Meng Guqing suddenly jumped out from behind the rockery.
I pretended not to see it and walked on.
“How dare you not salute the queen when you see her?”
I saluted and said, “The empress is blessed.”
She circled around me and said, “With such a good figure, no wonder Fulin is fascinated by you.”. Behind my back, I don’t know what shameful means you have used. Can you teach me?
I said, “The empress is joking. I am Bogor’s wife.”
She said, “You still know that you are Bogor’s wife. You are a fox spirit. You are still restless when you marry someone. You come to seduce the emperor every day. He is fascinated by you.”. It’s all right now. Auntie told you to get out of the palace. I’ll see how you can seduce Fu Lin this time.
I finally couldn’t help but retort, “The empress has misunderstood me. I didn’t seduce Fulin.”
Meng Guqing raised his hand and slapped me, fanning me to the ground.
She glared at me and said, “I’ll give you a taste of what it’s like to be slapped.”
She was so cruel that my face was burning. “Why, do you want to fight back?”
She asked aggressively.
I was full of grievances, but I had to say, “I dare not. The empress has taught me a lesson.” “You’d better remember who you are,” said
Meng Guqing.
Su Moer came over from behind me and helped me get up and said to Meng Guqing, “You’ve got the result you want, so don’t embarrass Dafujin.”
Meng Guqing said, “If I don’t give this southern barbarian a few slaps, I won’t be able to get rid of my hatred.”
Then he reached out to me again, and Su Moer grasped Meng Guqing’s wrist. “Why,” said
Meng Guqing, “are you a dog slave to stop me?”
Su Moer showed no sign of weakness and said, “That’s what Empress Dowager Zhuang meant. She also asked me to tell you that you’d better remember your identity, too.”. If she can get you up, she can get you down.
Meng Guqing was livid, but he could not say much, so he had to take the servants back to Palace of Earthly Tranquility.
Sumer helped me out, and I thanked her.
She said, “Fu Jin, don’t blame the empress either. She has been spoiled since she was a child, and her temper is naturally a little unreasonable.”
I said, “I won’t see her again anyway.”
A few months later, I heard the news from the palace that Meng Guqing had been deposed by the emperor. Soon, however, Empress Dowager Zhuang married a Gege of the Borgit family to Fulin, and immediately made her empress. In April of
the following year, Empress Dowager Zhuang issued a decree to abolish the old practice of ordering his wife to enter the palace to serve the empresses and concubines.
Since the spring of this year, smallpox began to rage in the city, and many people died every day in the capital. Piles of corpses were transported from the Due South Gate to be burned in the wilderness more than 40 miles outside the city.
No one knows how this disease came about. It is so fierce that everyone turns pale at the mention of it.
Once you catch smallpox, you only have two months to live.
If you can survive the rash within two months, you will never have it again. This kind of person is also called a “familiar person.”.
Smallpox has caused panic among the people. Few pedestrians were seen on the
street, and all of them hid in their homes. Bogor had not yet had smallpox, so he stayed at home all that time.
I don’t like to be busy by nature, and it suits me not to go out behind closed doors. Coming out
of Guangji Temple, I still keep the habit of worshipping Buddha. Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva, whom I worshipped in Guangji Temple, was also brought to the palace by me.
Bogor knew that I had the habit of worshipping Buddha, and even wanted to build a hall for me in the mansion.
I said that if the heart of worshipping Buddha is not sincere, it is useless to build a big temple.
I persuaded him to give up his idea.
I set up a Buddhist hall in an uninhabited hut next to his study, reading, worshipping Buddha and copying Buddhist scriptures with hairpins and flowers every day. There are poor people and nobles who die
because of smallpox. Death will not be distinguished because of people’s poverty and wealth. In front of it, everyone is truly equal.
I thought that my life would go on like this step by step.
Unexpectedly, because of this smallpox, earth-shaking changes have taken place.
This thing originated from an unremarkable noon.
On that day, I was on the seat in front of the window of the Buddha Hall, transcribing the scriptures with a hairpin and a small script.
Suddenly I heard a cough coming from Bogor’s study.
At first, I didn’t take it to heart. Until later, his cough became louder and louder. Only
then did I realize the seriousness of the matter.
I stopped writing and ran to the study in a panic.
I asked him, “What’s wrong with you?”
Bogor had a fever all over, and his face did not look very good.
He sat down on a chair and said, “It could be a cold, or it could be smallpox.”
I went up to him. “Bogor, you mustn’t frighten me.”
He stepped back and said, “What’s so terrible about smallpox? It’s not like you’ll die if you get it.”. Aren’t there a lot of people still alive with smallpox?
I wanted to take his hand and said, “I will not allow you to say such a thing.”
He put his hands behind his back and asked me, “Why, do you love me?”
I said, “What time is it? You still want to make fun of me.”. I’ll send for the Imperial Physician.
The imperial physician arrived at the mansion in the afternoon, and he finished examining Bogor’s condition.
I asked him how it turned out, if it was smallpox.
The Imperial Physician replied, “The early stage of smallpox is very similar to cold. You can only wait ten days to see if you have a rash on your body before you can determine the result.”. Prince Hsiang has a high fever. I’ll give him some medicine to get rid of the cold first.
I said, “There’s Mr. Lao.”
The Imperial Physician also exhorted, “During this period of time, Prince Xiang must be careful to avoid contact with people in the mansion who have not been infected with smallpox.” After
the Imperial Physician left, I ordered someone to clean a room for Bogor, and arranged for several familiar people who had already had a rash to wait on him.
In those days, I was frightened.
I visit Bogor every day and pray in front of Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva, hoping that Bogor will get better. I’m
afraid I’ll never see him again if I have a chance.
But Bogor was afraid that the disease would infect me, and he never let me into the house.
I sat under the door outside and talked to him.
I’ve been married to him for more than two years.
But in the past two years, I haven’t said as much as I have in these days.
I asked him, “What do you want for lunch? I’ll make it for you.”. Lily and lotus seed soup or fish stewed with candied dates?
“As long as you do it, I like it.”
I said, “Then you can choose the one you like best.”
As Bogor was lying in his hospital bed, he suddenly laughed. I asked him, “What are you laughing at?”
Bogor said, “This is a great illness.”
“What good could it be to be sick? You’re worrying me to death.”
Bogor said, “If it were not for this serious illness, you would not be so kind to me.”
I was silent for a moment, not knowing what to say. In the more than
two years since we were married, Bogor and I have always respected each other and have never quarreled.
But it is this too idealistic mode of getting along that may make him feel unripe. Between a
real husband and wife, there is no reason not to quarrel.
Bogor said, “I actually hoped that my serious illness would last longer.”
I said, “You must be sick and stupid and start talking nonsense again.” “I’m not stupid,
” Bogor said. “I’m sober now.”
I said, “You lie down for a while, and I’ll cook for you.”
Before I left, I said to him again.
“Bogor, if you can get better this time, I will treat you like this in the future.” A cough came from
the room.
Finally, Bogor said, “Now my cough is full of happy voices.”
But just a few days later, what I was worried about inevitably happened.
Bogor began to develop chickenpox, the most typical sign of smallpox, on his face and arms.
Once this symptom occurs, the chances of living are slim.
I was so anxious that I shed tears outside the house.
Bogor asked, “Are you crying outside the door, like?”
I stopped sobbing and said, “No, I’m not crying.”
Bogor was talking nonsense again. He said, “This is the first time you have shed tears for me. It feels good.” When
he said this, I couldn’t stop my tears. “Don’t cry,
” Bogor said. “I want you to smile for me, not cry for me.” There is no cure for smallpox in the
world, but I keep calling doctors for him.
Only by doing so, I feel as if I can make up for the guilt in my heart. I haven’t been good enough to him
all these years. Although
I did my duty as a wife, I did not do my duty as a wife.
He gave me everything a husband could do. Love me, love me, protect me, spoil me.
Then I thought about it, in fact, Bogor and I were both victims of this marriage.
But I used cold and cruel means to treat the unfortunate person in another marriage.
Bogor said, “I am not the unfortunate person in this marriage. I am actually the happiest person in this marriage.” I have loved you
since the first time I met you. Your every smile is different, when I know that the queen mother gave me the girl is you, I am so happy that my heart almost jumped out. On the wedding day, when we worshipped each other, I swore to myself. In this life, I must make you happy.
Bogor’s words, one by one, cut my heart like a knife.
His voice grew fainter and fainter, and he spoke on and off. Now
I no longer care about whether I will catch smallpox or not, pushing open the wooden door that separates us from each other. Life and death
aside, I want to see him for the last time.
I ran to his bedside and looked at Bogor’s weak appearance, already in tears.
Bogor blamed me and said, “I told you not to let you in. What if the disease infects you?”
I said, “I’m not afraid. Smallpox doesn’t necessarily kill people anyway.”
Bogor seemed to have a premonition that his death was near.
He saved the rest of his strength to talk to me.
He said, “Just as I have been living in contradiction, I know that you like my brother in your heart.”
I hesitated, he continued. Don’t deny it
yet. You can’t fool people with the way you look at him. I thought that as long as I was good enough to you, I would always warm your soft heart. But what I never thought was that your heart was harder than a stone. No matter how warm I am, it is cold.
I bowed my head and said, “I didn’t want this either, Bogor. I’m sorry.” “I’m the one who should say sorry,”
said Bogor. I know you like my brother. But when the Empress Dowager offered to marry me, I didn’t refuse. Am I being too selfish?
I said, “Since the Empress Dowager does not allow me to enter the palace, even if you refuse, there will still be another Bogor.”
Maybe if I die, you’ll be able to be with your brother, and you’ll be happier. Now that I’m gone, I hope you’ll be happy in the future.
I held his hand and said, “I’ve had a great time with you these two years.”
Bogor laughed. “I can hear these words before I die. I am satisfied and have nothing to worry about.”
He laughed, but I cried.
He wanted to come and help me dry my tears, but he didn’t dare to stretch out his hand.
He just looked at me and said, “I know you always cry.”
Don’t cry for me, it’s not worth it. I’ve only gone to a faraway place, and you look better when you laugh than when you cry.
I fought back my tears and smiled at him.
His hand gradually slipped from my palm, and then he said his last words to me:
“I’m sorry, as if.”. I didn’t fulfill my promise to protect you for the rest of your life. In the thirteenth year
of Shunzhi, on the third day of the seventh month, Prince Xiang Bo Mu Bo Guo Er died.
I spent a very sad afternoon on this day. Go to sleep in
sorrow and wake up in sorrow. As a descendant of the royal family, the funeral scene of
Eight
Bogor is very solemn and cumbersome.
I like quietness rather than activity, and I like leisure rather than excitement. The whole courtyard was full
of mourners. Chunxiu, a girl, knew the general situation, did things briskly, and arranged things in good order. If she hadn’t been there, I would have been exhausted to death after this funeral.
Bogor lay quietly in the coffin of the mourning hall, and I couldn’t bear to see it.
The funeral was held for three consecutive days, and at noon on the sixth day of the seventh month, Bogor’s coffin was buried in the imperial mausoleum. After
his death, his posthumous title was Xiangzhao. I was grief-stricken by days
of fatigue and the grief of Bogor’s death. On the third day after he left, I was seriously ill.
When I think of his kindness to me in the past, I hate my heartlessness, and my chest begins to ache again. The pain lasted
from morning to night, and I was sick in bed. I don’t want to
eat and drink, and I am depressed.
I said to Chunxiu, “When a man dies, he suffers less than when he is alive.”
Chunxiu leaned over my bed and said, “Master, it’s better to live than to die.”
I asked her, “Chunxiu, you must be fourteen years old this year.”
“I will be fifteen years old in November of this year.”
Look at my memory. I’ve forgotten how old you are. It’s time to find you a suitable husband. You don’t look so bad. I’ll find you a good family.
“If Chunxiu doesn’t leave, I’m willing to serve my master for the rest of my life.”
I said, “There is no reason for a master to tie up a maid for a lifetime. I don’t know if I can get through this.”
She cried, “Master, if you die, what will Chunxiu do?”
I asked Chunxiu to bring me the pear wood box on my dressing table. I opened the box and said, “I still have some jewelry here. It’s not much, but it’s enough to feed and clothe you for the rest of your life.”
I put it in her hand, and she gave it back to me. “I was bought by my master for twenty taels of silver,”
she said stubbornly. “This life belongs to my master all my life.”
I remember the first time I saw Chunxiu. Her little face was sallow, her hair was dirty, and in winter she wore only a thin robe. She crouched in a corner, and the sign beside her read, “Sell your body to bury your father.”.
She is too small to fetch a good price.
So none of the people who came and went were willing to buy her. I gave her twenty taels of silver, which was enough to buy ten girls like her, not to mention one. When
I put the money into her hand, Chunxiu knelt on the ground and could not stop kowtowing to me, saying that she would like to be a cow and a horse for me in the future.
I said to her, “Get up.” I saw that although her appearance was dirty, her appearance was not bad, and she looked very clever and lovely.
I said, “You can be my personal servant girl in the future.” As soon as she did
this, she followed me for eight years.
I followed my husband to learn etiquette, and then I went to Guangji Temple, and then I got married. For so many years, Chunxiu has been with me.
She fed me the decoction, and I saw the red wound on her hand when she decocted the decoction.
I said, “Chunxiu, thank you for being with me all these years.”. I haven’t had any playmates since I was a child, but you grew up with me. Although you and I are nominally masters and servants, we are like sisters. “Master,”
said Chunxiu, “Chunxiu knows how good you are to me.”
She stood up and wiped away her tears and said, “Master, the medicine should be ready. I’ll go and have a look.”
She decocted the medicine and served me every day, never leaving my side. It took me half a month before I recovered.
It was a walk in the gate of death. As I
gradually recovered, I ordered the attendants to clean room where Bogor had lived. When
he was bedridden with smallpox, all the things he used were thrown out and burned to prevent the disease from spreading in the palace.
This palace, but only a person less Bogor, but deserted hundreds of times. The empty courtyard makes people feel uncomfortable. The way
I feel about Bogor is like the objects burned in these fires.
The fire is burning my remaining memory of Bogor, and it will eventually be burned to ashes.
I stood on the edge of the porch and felt a huge sense of helplessness coming over me.
Endless loss surrounds an inch of land around me. In the middle of
July, when I was in a helpless situation, trying to get out of the pain, Fulin suddenly appeared in the palace of Prince Xiang, and he said to me in a tone of almost fanatical surprise.
“Like, I feel like God is giving us a second chance to be together.”
I panicked and told him that Bogor had just died.
But I’ve waited too long. I don’t want to lose a moment. I am afraid that I will not be able to seize the opportunity that God has given me.
I said, “This is against the law of the world.”
His eyes were full of possessive desire, and his face was fearless and resolute.
“I don’t give a shit about the world. I’m the king of the Qing Dynasty. If I can’t even have the woman I love, what’s the point of being an emperor?”
Fulin’s words upset me.
But in the end, I didn’t agree to his request.
He came more and more frequently, the emperor’s whereabouts in any case can not hide, and finally one day he alarmed the queen mother. At the end of
July, when Fulin had just entered the palace, the bodyguard came into the house to inform her that the queen mother had arrived outside the palace in her chariot.
I hurriedly led a group of servants to meet her. I saluted the Empress Dowager, saying, “My concubine Wu Yunzhu has paid her respects. The Empress Dowager is lucky and blessed.”
The queen mother motioned me to get up.
Fulin stepped forward and asked, “Mother, why are you here today?” “Your Majesty,” said Empress Dow
ager Chuang, “you’ve been running here from time to time these days, and you’re going to miss the government.” The tone of Fulin’s voice
is clear and cold: “The land and the country, the ancestral rites and laws.”. You always put these things on my head. I didn’t bring down the country. I knew I should have given up the throne to Dorgon. He was so greedy. Empress Dow
ager Chuang’s face was a little ugly. “Let’s not talk about state affairs. You often go to the palace. It’s hard to avoid being gossiped about. After all, Wu Yunzhu is the widow of your brother.”
When Fulin heard Empress Dowager Zhuang say this, she jumped up and asked in reply, “Who did not tell me that I would like to marry Bogor? At the beginning, I begged you again and again to let me marry Wu Yunzhu of Dong’e Mansion.”. As a result, a civet cat came for the prince. She married her sister Dong E to me, but she secretly married him to Bogor. Mother, look at me. I’m your own son. There’s no reason why a mother doesn’t want her son to be happy. “You were only 14 or 15 at that time,” said Empress Dow
ager Chuang. “I’ve been there. Understand that once you separate, it won’t take long for you to stop thinking about each other and forget about each other. “That’s someone else, not me,”
said Fulin. “After all these years, my love for Wanru has never diminished.”
“How can you take your brother’s fortune as your own?”
“Mother, you don’t have to tease me. I’ll tell you directly now. I’ve decided to marry Dong Wanru.”
I didn’t expect him to dare to say such a thing in front of the queen mother. I stood behind him and stretched out my hand to pull the corner of his clothes, so that he would not go on, so as not to hurt her and the queen mother’s harmony. Empress Dowager
Zhuang rejected Fulin’s intention to marry me.
Fulin took out his sword and pressed it against his chest, saying, “If you don’t let me marry Wanru, you’ll be the emperor of the Qing Dynasty.”
“Do you dare?”
“Do you think I won’t?” The knife
in Fulin’s hand pierced his chest a little bit, and immediately blood gushed out. The queen mother’s face did not change, and Fulin’s knife was one minute closer.
The left and right guards had already come forward and snatched the knife from Fulin’s hand. After the
people stopped the wound, the queen mother motioned for everyone to step down.
She was so angry that she could hardly stand. Her face was livid. “Aren’t you afraid of being laughed at by the whole world?” She asked. Be laughed at by all the
people in the world? Have I been laughed at less by the people of the world? Dourgen actually asked me to call him the emperor’s uncle. How did I become the emperor? If it weren’t for you and Dourgen..
Fulin words did not finish, a clear ear light sound fell on Fulin face, the queen mother at the moment angry face.
“I married the late emperor when I was 13 years old. When the Qing Dynasty was in turmoil, it was I who helped the court. Before I married the late emperor, I liked Dorgon, but Dorgon and I always adhered to it and never did anything out of line.”
Do you think it was an accident that Dorgon fell off his horse and died in the seventh year of the reign of Emperor Shunzhi? Do you think it’s easy for our mother and son to get this far. When the late emperor died, how many people coveted the throne? If I hadn’t dealt with them, we two would have been dead souls under the sword. How could you sit on the throne of the Qing Dynasty?
“You know how much I’ve paid for your Aisin Gioro family.” Empress Dowager
Zhuang had already abandoned the feelings of the world, and now she only held the scepter of the Qing Dynasty tightly. She not only strangled her own feelings, but also killed the person she loved when she was young. After hearing this
, Fulin shed tears. As a son, he watched his mother take him step by step to the top of the empire in the undercurrent of power. Fulin knew in his heart how difficult it was for Empress Dowager Zhuang to live for so many years.
He pulled the clothes of Empress Dowager Zhuang in a decadent way.
The child has never asked his mother for anything. This is the first time I have asked my mother. If you let me marry Wanru, I will be a good emperor in the future. Empress Dowager
Zhuang broke away from Fulin’s hand and walked out of the door.
Fulin called her behind him.
“Mother, mother, mother!!!” Empress Dowager
Zhuang stopped and looked back at Fulin, who was sitting on the ground in vain. “Get up and go back to the palace,” she said. “It’s like sitting on the ground and crying. It’s beneath the dignity of the royal family.”
Fulin got up from the ground.
“So you agree?”
“I’m just an old woman. You’re the emperor of the Qing Dynasty.”
Nine
Shunzhi thirteen years, August 25.
I was welcomed into the palace, made a virtuous concubine, and entered the Chenggan Palace. The wedding banquet on the
big wedding day was very lively. It was even more magnificent than when Meng Guqing entered the palace.
That evening, Fulin put his arm around me and said with deep feeling, “As if, we are finally together.”
He carried me to the dragon couch and slowly untied my sleeves. I
did not dare to look at him. I lowered my head shyly and said, “Your Majesty, the light is still on.”
He got up and blew out the candle. In the darkness, his cold hand tried to slip into my clothes.
I slowly closed my eyes.
Outside the window, a hibiscus tree is in full bloom. A skylark flew from the
sky, landed on the branch, and pecked the flowers that had not yet fully bloomed beside the trunk with its sharp beak. Shaking
branches, a white hibiscus fell into the water, petals turned up and down with the water, in the soft moonlight, wet all over the body.
It was one of the few happy times in my life. I always thought it would be the beginning of happiness. Who would have thought that tragedy had just begun.
Since I entered the palace, Fulin has been very diligent in the affairs of the court, contrary to the casual and playful nature of the past.
I said to him, “Your Majesty is young, but ambitious.”. You will create a new generation, become a wise king, be recorded in the annals of history, and enjoy the praise of all generations. In the
study, I grind ink for Fulin.
He was dancing like a dragon and a phoenix, reading on the book. After a while, Fulin lay in a chair with his eyes closed, and I stood behind him and gently kneaded his temples with my fingers.
He took me by the hand and held me in his warm arms. He handed me the book and said,
“Come and read it to me.”
I said, “Your Majesty, this is absolutely unacceptable. The harem must not interfere in politics.”
Fulin pulled out a copy from a pile of notes and said, “You have to listen to this one. This is Wu Ke-shan asking me to hold a talent show next spring.” In front of me,
he wrote “Not Passed” on the passbook.
Then he said to me, “As if, from now on, I will never accept a concubine or a concubine into the harem.”
“Your Majesty, you are the Supreme of the Ninth Five-Year Plan. You should have more concubines and more heirs.” Pointing to my stomach,
he said, “Then you can give me more children. If it’s a girl, I’ll spoil her into the happiest princess in the world. If it’s a boy, I’ll make him the emperor of the Qing Dynasty.”
Then the two of us will go to a place where no one can find us, live in seclusion in the mountains, and be an ordinary couple. Like Tao yuan-ming, he manages the desolation in the morning and returns with the moon and the hoes.
“It must be a pleasant life, Your Majesty.”
He said, “Stop calling me Your Majesty and call me Fulin.”
“Fulin.”
“As if.”
He lowered his head and kissed me between the eyes. As soon as
I entered the palace, I was favored by the emperor.
On September 29, a month after I entered the palace, I was proposed to be an imperial concubine by Fulin, second only to the empress. Favor crown harem
for a time. The Borjit clan of
Mongolia was an important force to seize the world in the former Qing Dynasty. In the harem, there were six concubines from the Borjigit clan alone. There are rumors in the
palace that Meng Guqing was out of favor because of me. Although
she has fallen out of favor, demoted to Jing Fei, living in the side palace, but relying on the queen mother is her aunt, in the palace is still unscrupulous. She was moody, and when the maids made a slight mistake, they would reach out and beat her, so that all the ladies were afraid of her. After
I was made an imperial concubine, she didn’t salute me.
I remember being slapped in the face by her for this reason a few years ago.
I like to be kind to others in everything, and I have never haggled with her. The concubines of the Borgit family in
the harem were naturally far away from me because of Meng Guqing and me. In the
Imperial Garden, when a group of people were looking at Koi by the guardrail, when I approached, they suddenly dispersed.
At first, I tried to get closer to them.
Can not enter the circle, is always unable to enter. Fortunately, I am used to being quiet, and with Chunxiu as a girl to accompany me, I don’t think this day is too boring. The New Year of the 13th year
of Shunzhi has just passed.
I always feel that my health is not better, and I always feel more tired and lazy than usual. I was extremely sleepy at noon every day, and Fulin called the Imperial Physician for me.
The doctor put down the medicine box, stretched out his right hand, and put two fingers on my pulse.
After a while, he burst out laughing.
Fu Lin quickly asked him, “How is your condition?”
The Imperial Physician stood up and saluted me and the Emperor, saying, “Congratulations to Your Majesty and the Imperial Concubine. The Empress is very happy.”
When Fulin heard this, he stood up from his chair excitedly.
“Reward! Reward!”
The Imperial Physician hastened to thank him: “Thank the Lord for his kindness.”
Fulin went to the bedside, took my hand and said, “Thank you, Yu. I feel I am the happiest person in the world now.” Late one night,
eight months later. I had a sharp pain in my
abdomen, and the ladies of the court held the lamp.
The midwife was admitted to Chenggan Palace as early as a month ago. As soon as I have a reaction in my belly, they can get there in time.
My body was weak, and I was half dead when I gave birth, which lasted from late at night to the next morning. As
the morning sun rose, I heard a cry coming from under me.
Then I heard the matchmaker shouting, “Congratulations to the imperial concubine, it’s a son.”
Fulin rushed in from outside the door. I saw that his eyes were red. He must have stayed up half the night outside the door last night.
He took the little prince from the midwife’s arms and put him beside me.
“Do you think he’s more like you or more like me?”
I laughed. “His eyes are like your majesty, and his nose is like your concubine. His ears are like your majesty, and his mouth is like your concubine.”
The little fellow was so good that he cried for a while and then fell asleep quietly.
His palms were pink, his eyes were as clear as a green lake, and his little face was pink and lovely. When he
grows up, he must be a handsome young man.
Fulin sat on the edge of the bed and held me in his arms.
As if we finally had a child of our own. Do you remember what I said? I would make him the emperor of the Qing Dynasty and give him all the land.
I said, “Fulin, I don’t want him to be king and emperor, but I want him to live well.” “Don’t worry,”
said Fulin. “I’ll give him whatever he wants. I’ll love him as much as I love you.” After
I gave birth to the fourth son of the emperor, Fulin granted amnesty to the world, and issued an edict on the birth of the first son of the emperor, intending to make the prince I gave birth to crown prince. When Empress Dowager
Zhuang knew about this, she ran from the Palace of Compassion and Tranquility to the emperor’s Imperial Study. “Nonsense!”
She scolded Fulin. “You’re just fooling around.” “I’m already in power,”
said Fulin. “I know what I’m doing.”
Do you know how much turmoil there would be in the court if the four princes were made crown princes. If you want to hold the throne, you must have the support of the ministers in the court. Even if you are in power, you can’t do it completely according to your own temperament.
When Fulin heard this, he was extremely impatient. “I’m already the emperor. Why should I be controlled by others in every word and deed?” “If you were born in an imperial family,” said Empress Dowager
Zhuang, “you must know that the whole world is watching your every move. Now the real power is in the hands of the ministers in the court. If you are not careful, there will be a second Dorgon. Speaking
of Dourgen, Fulin’s hand on the Dragon Chair trembled slightly.
“Don’t mention that name to me again. If it wasn’t for his power, I wouldn’t have been so depressed for so many years.” Empress Dowager
Zhuang looked at her son, who was still young but ambitious, and said. When
an emperor does things, he must know how to exercise restraint and forbearance. Don’t be too obvious about what you like too much and what you don’t like. Your love for her will also put pressure on her. The emperor’s love is too heavy. I’m afraid she can’t bear it. When
I was about to give birth, the other concubines in the palace sent me a lot of fruits, silks and satins, jewels and jade articles. Although
I do not like people in the harem, but the face should have, they naturally will not be less. Tong Fei, who has always been good friends
with me, also personally made a waistcoat for the little prince. Her hands are very skillful, and I like her waistcoat very much.
She said, “Good sister, when your little prince grows up, let Xuan Ye play with him.”
I looked at the little guy in front of the bed who couldn’t stop for a moment. He was very curious about the Buddha statue in my room. He kept asking his mother, “Mother, who is this?”
“That’s Ksitigarbha.”
“Mother, who is this?”
“That’s the Goddess of Mercy.”
“The imperial concubine, is she the child she gave birth to?”
I smiled at him and said, “It was because I worshipped her that I gave birth to your little brother.”
Xuan Ye said, “Is there any way to avoid punishing the Goddess of Mercy or beating the Buddha? I’ll go back to worship later.”
Tong Fei pulled him and sat beside him. “What nonsense? Don’t run around. I’ll sit well.”
She said to me, “This guy is very naughty. He never makes people worry.”
I said, “I quite like Ye’er. There is a sense of ingenuity in her naughtiness.”
I held the little guy in my arms and asked, “Xuan Ye, what do you want to do when you grow up?” Without thinking,
he said, “When I grow up, I want to be in charge of the Qing Dynasty, just like my father.”
When Tong Fei heard this, her face changed greatly, and she was so anxious that tears almost fell out.
He quickly knelt down and said, “The imperial concubine, Xuan Ye is young and ignorant, and he said such nonsense.”
I knew that it was all right for me to hear his words, but if they were heard by the other concubines outside, she would not be able to get a foothold in the future.
I said, “What can a child understand?”. Don’t worry, Concubine Tong, his words won’t get out of this room. Concu
bine Tong said, “The imperial concubine has a kind heart.”
I gave birth to a prince, and my body is weak.
All kinds of supplements were sent to the palace, and Fulin ordered the Imperial Kitchen to make me a bowl of ginseng chicken soup every day.
He wished I could eat five meals a day, and I said that if I continued to eat like that, I would get fat. “I will like you no matter what you become,”
said Fulin.
I said, “Don’t get bored with me. It’s time for Your Majesty to go to the morning court.”
He kissed me between the eyes and said, “When I come back.”
The palace kept sending all kinds of supplements, but I couldn’t eat them all the time.
Fortunately, there is Chunxiu this girl, although her body bone is small, but the appetite is very big.
This girl has no other hobbies, just love to eat.
She said that she had the best relationship with the ladies of the court in Imperial Kitchen, and that she knew them so that she could steal food.
Every time the eunuch brought up all kinds of supplements such as ginseng chicken soup, I had no appetite when I tasted them, and I was afraid of being blamed by Fulin. It was all Chunxiu who helped me finish eating, so I didn’t even have any soup left. In the third month of
my labor, tributes were still coming from the palace. Just after
lunch, I asked Chunxiu to pack up the tribute and put it in the compartment.
Chunxiu pulled out a box of snacks from the middle. The
snacks seemed to be made of snow, looked soft and attractive, and I could smell the fragrance from so far away.
Chunxiu, that girl, has long been greedy to drool.
She asked me, “Master, will you eat?” I have eaten too much
at noon, and I have no appetite.
I said, “Eat, and leave it all to you.”
Chunxiu was so happy that she opened the box and ate four or five pieces in a short time. “Wow, it’s delicious,”
said Chunxiu. “Master, won’t you try it?”
She made a deliberate slobber.
I said, “I’ll take a little bite.”
I took the snack, and before I could put it in my mouth, Chunxiu knocked the food out of my hand.
She covered her belly and her face was extremely ugly.
Then she fell headlong to the ground, spitting blood from her mouth. I hurriedly called the maid outside and hurried to the hospital to invite the best doctor to come over.
I picked her up and put her on my bed and wiped the blood from her mouth with my handkerchief.
I said, “Haochunxiu, be patient a little longer. The Imperial Physician will come soon.” The more
I rubbed, the more blood there was in her mouth.
The handkerchief was all soaked with blood, so I wiped her with my cuff.
Chun-hsiu looked at me and said, “I thought Chun-hsiu would accompany my master to the end of his life and raise the little prince for him, but I didn’t think I’d have to go first.”
I said, “No, Chunxiu, you are still so young. How can you die?”. I’m going to find you a good home.
Chun-hsiu said, “As soon as I left, I was afraid that my master would be too lonely to live alone in this palace.”
Then she spurted a big mouthful of blood from her mouth and spat on me.
I said, “Chunxiu, save your strength and stop talking.”
“Chun-hsiu wants to talk, but if she doesn’t, she won’t have a chance.”
In all my life, no one has ever been nice to Chunxiu. It was you, master, who bought Chunxiu back. If it weren’t for you, I would have starved to death more than ten years ago. If there was a next life, I would still be your maid.
I said, “If there is a next life, we will change our identities and I will be your maid.”
Chun-hsiu smiles. “The master will be Chun-hsiu’s master no matter what.”
My tears pattered in front of me, mixed with Chunxiu’s blood.
“It’s so dark. Chun-hsiu is afraid.”
I quickly held Chunxiu in my arms and said, “Chunxiu is not afraid. She has a master.” A smile appeared on
her face.
“My master’s embrace is like the mother who held me and sang lullabies when I was a child.” When
she finished, I began to sing her a lullaby. The
little lotus leaves show their sharp corners. My baby is going to sleep, and when he wakes up, the lotus pods are already ripe. Pieces of duckweed come out of the water. My baby is going to sleep. When she wakes up, Mother will take you to touch the water caltrop. Before I finished singing
my lullaby, Chunxiu slowly closed her eyes.
She said, “Father, mother, and brother, Chunxiu has come to see you.”
After Chunxiu died, Fulin was furious. People were
ordered to thoroughly investigate the case, and for a time the harem was shaken and people were in a panic.
The matter was checked and checked, and finally it was found on the head of Tong Fei. Before
I gave birth to four princes, Fulin already had three princes. The eldest prince died in his early years, the second prince Fu was the child of my sister, and the third prince was Xuan Ye. Tong Fei is the most suspected among
all the people, and more importantly, she has a close relationship with me, and no one has made a detailed investigation when she goes in and out of Chenggan Palace. The night the
case was investigated, Tong Fei had already got the news in advance. Later
that night, Tong Fei came to Chenggan Palace with three princes, Xuan Ye.
As soon as she entered the door, Tong Fei called Xuan Ye to kneel down for me.
“kowtow to your wife and beg her mercy to save our mother and son.”
Xuan Ye immediately knelt on the ground and kept kowtowing to me, saying, “Please ask the imperial concubine to help me.”
He knocked harder and harder, and a lump bulged out of his head.
I hurried to help him, but Xuan Ye kept kowtowing. With tears in his eyes,
he said, “If the imperial concubine doesn’t help me, I’ll keep knocking.”
Tong Fei is only a concubine in the palace, and Xuan Ye is young. I looked at their mother and son two strange pitiful, hurriedly let Xuan Ye speak first. “What’s the matter,”
I asked, “coming here in the middle of the night?” Concu
bine Tong wiped away her tears with a handkerchief and said, “The case of poisoning you last time was found out. The eunuch who delivered the food in the palace identified me as the one who did it.”. My sister is a wise judge. Even if you give me a hundred guts, I won’t dare to harm you.
I said, “Then go and review it again.” After the eunuch who
delivered the food identified me, he bit his tongue and committed suicide. He stayed with me for more than ten years, and no one would believe that he had been ordered to frame me. It doesn’t matter if I die, but my son is still young. As she
spoke, she showed Xuanye in her arms and continued, “What Xuanye said a few days ago was just nonsense. Sister, don’t think I taught him. I know I’m in a low position, and I don’t expect Xuanye to take the throne. I just hope that our mother and son can live safely.”
I haven’t been in contact with Tong Fei for a long time, but I also know that she doesn’t like to compete with others for favor and is generous.
Such a cruel means, she certainly can not do.
I comforted her and said, “Don’t worry, I will go to your majesty to plead for you.” With a sigh, Concu
bine Tong said, “Since I entered the palace, I have been cautious in my words and deeds, and I have been patient, but I have still caused trouble.”
I went to Fulin to plead for mercy, and he naturally did not pursue the trouble of Tong Fei.
It’s just that Chunxiu died for no reason, and I hurt her.
If I hadn’t taken her to the palace and married her early, she would not have died. Maybe she would have had her own child.
Fulin arranged several clever and dexterous maids for me, but none of them could match Chunxiu.
They are not as good as Chunxiu can say, not as good as Chunxiu can laugh, not as good as Chunxiu can eat, the most important thing is that they are not as long as Chunxiu with me. In the winter of the year when
I gave birth to the fourth prince, the queen mother fell ill.
She is old, and many people say that Empress Dowager Zhuang is fatigue this time. There are few pommel horses
in front of the door.
In the past, the lively Palace of Compassion and Tranquility instantly deserted a lot, if the queen mother went, the natural power of the harem fell on the queen.
I insisted on paying my respects to the Empress Dowager every day, and although there were many maids waiting on her, none of Borgit’s concubines, her nieces, went to her to pay their respects.
She was so old that she had no daughter to take care of her, and she looked very pitiful.
Now her dutiful nieces may wish her early death at this time.
I will arrange the four princes every day, then go to the Palace of Compassion and Tranquility to wait on the queen mother. Empress Dowager
Zhuang looked dispirited, and when she heard someone coming to her, she opened her eyes vaguely. Pointing at
me, he asked, “Meng Guqing, is that you?”? Meng Ku-ching.
I went up and took her hand, and I said, “Mother, it is I.”
“Who are you?”
“Mother, I am Wu Yunzhu.”
The Empress Dowager lowered her eyes and said disappointedly, “So it’s you, Wu Yunzhu.”. Why did you come to my Palace of Compassion and Tranquility instead of taking care of the fourth elder brother at the Chenggan Palace?
I said, “Mother, you are old, and now you are seriously ill. You can’t be short of people.”. If you drink or are hungry, tell me so I can serve you tea.
A clear tear flowed from the corner of Empress Dowager Zhuang’s eye. She looked at me guiltily and said, “Wu Yunzhu, the worst thing I could have done in my life was to break up you and Fulin.”
“I thought you were so young, and that when you were young, your love was just like a flower in the mirror, which could be blown away by a gust of wind.”
I said, “Mother, don’t say that. Bogor was really good to me. I don’t regret marrying her.” Empress Dowager
Zhuang took me by the hand and said, “Really, Wu Yunzhu?”
I said, “Really.”
She giggled madly again, “I look at you and Fulin, just like me and Dorgon in those days. It was a tragedy of love.”. The difference is that you chose love and I chose power.
Her husky voice narrated the story of that year. I personally
handed Dorgon the bowl of wine he had before he set out for the hunt. But my acting was so bad that when I gave him the wine, my hands were shaking all the time. Dourgen took my shaking hands and said to me, “Kindness is not in charge of the army. If the heart is not ruthless, how can country sit still?”
As if, you say. Isn’t my heart a little too hard?
I said, “Mother, it was only with you that the Qing Dynasty came into being.” Empress Dow
ager Chuang, her temples greying, said dejectedly to herself, “I have only got four words in my life, the Great Qing Dynasty.”
Sometimes the records in the history books are often too ruthless. There are only simple and calm words about Dorgon’s death.
The regent Dorgon was ill and hunted outside the border. In December, Wuzi, the regent and Prince Dorgon died in Kara City.
Eleven
months later, Empress Dowager Zhuang miraculously recovered from her illness.
When Fulin learned that the queen mother was seriously ill, the queen did not come forward to perform filial piety, and angrily withdrew her position. After
Meng Guqing was deposed, the new queen was still young, and her command of the harem was not as good as Meng Guqing, but she was just a little girl on the empress Dowager’s shelf. What she could understand must have been taught to her by her sisters and aunts from the Horqin tribe.
I interceded for her in front of the emperor. I said, “You have already had a deposed queen in your reign. If you depose another queen now, what will future generations think of you?”.
Fulin looked at me and said, “I want you to be my queen.”
I shook my head and said, “It’s like I don’t have a position in the harem. As long as I can be with Your Majesty, I’m happy to be a side concubine.” On the third day of her recovery, Empress Dowager
Zhuang called me to Palace of Compassion and Tranquility and rewarded me with many silks and satins.
I said, “As if there were no reward.” “Take it,” said
Su Moer. “This is the first time Empress Dowager Zhuang has given you something.” When
I thought about it, it seemed that I didn’t accept it, which was not in line with the etiquette, so I ordered the maid of my entourage to send the reward back to Chenggan Palace. “You’ve had a hard time the other day,” said Empress Dow
ager Chuang.
I said, “It is my duty to take care of the queen.” Empress Dow
ager Chuang said, “Only when you have a serious illness can you see people’s hearts clearly.”
I kept silent and just sat beside her. Empress Dow
ager Zhuang changed the subject and suddenly talked about another thing. She told me that she had decided to repatriate Meng Guqing to the Horqin Grassland.
I asked Empress Dowager Chuang, “Why did you send Meng Guqing back to Horqin?” “When you gave birth to the prince,” said Empress Dowager
Zhuang, “it was Meng Guqing who wanted to poison you and the prince.”
I can’t help but be dumb, but I’m not surprised at all. “Don’t blame me for being soft-hearted,” said
the Empress Dowager. “According to the law, Meng Guqing, this is a capital crime. But I’ve watched this child grow up, and I really can’t bear it. I had a lot to do with her making such a mistake. I spoiled the girl.
Chunxiu is dead. Even if Meng Guqing dies a hundred more times, my Chunxiu will not come back. I know that it may be the best choice to repatriate her to Horqin.
I replied to the queen mother, “The queen mother is wise enough to handle it properly.” The day
Meng Guqing was going back to the grassland, I went to see her.
I came to Palace of Eternal Longevity, and this was the first time I had come to Palace of Eternal Longevity since I entered the palace many years ago. I know I didn’t do anything wrong, but she always had a grudge against me.
For so many years, no matter what I do, I will try my best to avoid her, so as not to cause trouble. The courtyard of the
Palace of Eternal Longevity is in a dilapidated state. Although the courtyard is clean and tidy, the dead branches and flower beds on both sides make people feel uncomfortable. When I
entered the room, I saw her sitting on the bed, pouring herself a glass of wine at the table, and drinking it alone.
When she saw me enter the room, she said with a sneer, “There were so many good sisters in the palace that none of them came. I never thought you would come to see me off.”
I said, “After all, I’ve been in the palace for so many years, and I haven’t seen you when I look up, but I’ve seen you when I look down. That’s half a friendship.” She did not appreciate it
at all. “I don’t have any friendship with you,” she sneered. “You know, I’ve always hated you.”
I said, I know. Now that you are leaving, I have come to see you.
You didn’t come to see me, you came to disgust me, to mock me, to make fun of me. Are you happy to see me end up in such a miserable situation?
“If you think so, I can’t help it. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything wrong to you.” Suddenly
she jumped up from the bed and shouted at me, “But I hate you. I hate you for taking away everything that belongs to me.”
I’ve done so much for Fulin, but he’s never looked me in the eye once, and what have you done, shed a few tears, and talked to him about a few poems. It’s not fair, Wuyunzhu. It’s not fair at all. Why should you get everything I want and I get nothing?
She looked up at the high roofs of the Palace of Eternal Longevity. “Only this cold Palace of Eternal Longevity keeps me company.”
You won, Wuyunzhu. You finally took everything from me.
I said, “You and I don’t live to fight for anything. No one in this court is a real winner. Every one of us is a loser.”
She burst into tears: “Wu Yunzhu, I hate you! I hate Empress Dowager Zhuang! I hate Fulin! I hate that I was born in the grassland of Horqin! I hate this tall and cold palace! I hate all the people who live in this palace!”
Then she suddenly fell down, I came forward to support her, she fell into my arms. Spit blood out of
your mouth.
I asked her, “Did you poison the wine?”
She nodded, “I’m going to call the doctor for her.”.
“Don’t bother. I want to die myself. No one can save me.”
I looked at Meng Guqing’s sad and handsome face, her beautiful age, how beautiful she was. Like a flower that has just bloomed in spring, it will wither before it is appreciated.
She told me, “Wu Yunzhu, I poisoned your maid Chunxiu when she died.” “I know,”
I said calmly. “The queen has told me.”
“Aren’t you angry?” “I’m not angry,”
I said with a wry smile.
“Why?”
“Because I know you are a poor man, too.” As
she lay in my arms, she let out a sad laugh and said, “Wu Yunzhu, I beg you one thing before I die. Please let Fulin come and see me.”
I nodded my head.
She left with a smile, she said before she died.
I was born in Forbidden City, and even if I die, I will die in Forbidden City.
Twelve
Meng Guqing’s death shocked Empress Dowager Zhuang and Fulin. No one thought that even if she died, she would not leave the Forbidden City.
I think she and Fulin are quite similar. They are both infatuated. But who can say clearly about feelings.
But queen mother Zhuang see open, after all, she is a person who has experienced the storm, never favored by the imperial concubine, do in charge of the harem queen mother Zhuang. On the day
Meng Guqing’s coffin entered the imperial mausoleum, Empress Dowager Chuang said, “It would be better if she died, so that she wouldn’t have to suffer in this harem. Death might also be a kind of relief for her.”
The Empress Dowager stood in front of the Emperor’s Tomb, unable to stop feeling sad. Su Mo’er stepped forward to persuade her: “Empress Dowager, it’s a lot of trouble to stay here. We’d better go back to Palace of Compassion and Tranquility.” After Empress Dowager
Zhuang recovered, I put all my thoughts on my four princes.
Since Chunxiu left, he has become the biggest sustenance in my life. Like Concubine Tong,
I don’t have much obsession with whether my prince is an emperor or not. I only have the simplest and truest idea of a mother: I hope the four princes can grow up. As long as he can be happy, it doesn’t matter whether he is an emperor or not. When I became a mother for the
first time, I didn’t know much about many things, and I had to consult Tong Fei for everything, so my relationship with her was getting closer and closer.
This winter, the weather in Forbidden City was colder than usual, and I was overworked before, so I fell ill.
Tong Fei often brought Xuan Ye to visit me, and Fulin ran to my Chenggan Palace in the morning.
I hope I can get better soon. In February of
this year, there was a time when the fourth prince couldn’t stop crying. No matter how I coaxed him, it didn’t work. Tong Fei just lifted the curtain and walked into my room. I said, “Sister, look at the fourth prince. What’s wrong with him?” Concu
bine Tong touched the little prince’s forehead and said, “Sister, I’m afraid the little prince has contracted a disease and has a high fever.”
I quickly told the nuns in the room to go to the hospital and ask the doctor to come over. Before
the Imperial Physician arrived at Chenggan Palace, Fulin had already come.
He asked me with concern, “What’s wrong with the fourth elder brother?”
I was so anxious that I cried. I said the little prince was ill.
It was not long before the Imperial Physician arrived at the palace. The little prince had already stopped crying. The Imperial Physician stretched out his hand to feel his pulse. His face was ugly, and he could not stop sighing. “What’s wrong with the fourth elder brother?” Asked Fulin.
“The fourth prince died in infancy.”
I couldn’t believe what he said, and I rushed over to hug my fourth prince. I said, “No, just now he was alive and well. How could he suddenly die?”
I suddenly felt that I had lost the pillar of my life, and I wanted to go over and see the little prince again.
Fulin stopped me and said, “Don’t look at me, just look at me and you’ll never forget it.”
I took Fulin by the arm and said, “There must be a way, there must be a way.”. The four princes will not leave me alone.
Fulin held me in his arms, which was the only thing he could do. He said, “Come on, don’t do this.”
I just want the smallest and simplest happiness in the world.
But God couldn’t even satisfy me with the simplest wish. Three months after I went into labor, the fourth prince died.
That day, I cried my heart out.
I found it hard to breathe. Fulin’s arms were my only support at present. A great grief came. My weak body could not bear the grief. Finally, I fainted in Fulin’s arms. After the
four princes left, I couldn’t afford to get sick and never got better.
Fulin invited me the best doctor in the palace, but it didn’t work at all. I know that my time is coming.
Like the illness when my mother died when I was a child, I was depressed, in my heart but not in my body.
I used to be a sad and sick man, but I had a bad fate.
Fulin is with me every day and every night, and I don’t even want to go to the morning again. I advised him, “My concubine’s life is light, but my country is heavy.” “Without you,”
said Fulin, “what would be the point of having all these rivers and mountains?”
I laughed at his foolishness and said, “Fulin, you are talking nonsense again. If it is passed on to future generations, everyone should laugh at you.”
“Laugh, just laugh. I just love beauty, not rivers and mountains.”
I stroked his face and said, “My Fulin, I want to be a good emperor who cares about the world and makes great efforts to make the country prosperous.”
I was sad to think that I would never see the face I loved again. The blood in his heart rolled upward and spat out.
I feel at this time, the strength is a little bit from my body loss
of love, hate, joys and sorrows, time flow, I turn a few times in the earthly world and eventually is a piece of loess.
A few lines of tears fell from Fulin’s face, and I took a handkerchief to dry his tears. “Don’t cry,”
I told him. “You are the emperor of the Qing Dynasty. How can you shed tears for such a small thing?”
“Just like, if I could be with you, I would give up everything I have.”
“Fulin, the most painful thing in my life is to meet you, and the happiest thing in my life is to meet you.” In
my eyes, Fulin is still the young man who listened to the sound of the piano under the snow-red wall many years ago.
My hand slipped slowly from his face, and I said, “My life has been very tiring, very tiring.”
Affection does not live long, and extreme wisdom will hurt. Master Kuanshou advised me to go to Guangji Temple as a layman in order to cut off my love.
But I believe in Buddhism all my life, but I can’t cut off a word of love.
One breath does not come, where to settle down.
Fulin, without his Dong Wanru, Dong Wanru, will never see her Fulin again.
I died in the autumn of the 17th year of Shunzhi. In this year, the country was stable and the four seas were peaceful.
I just turned 22.
Thirteen
or fourteen months later, on the seventh day of the first month of the eighteenth year of Shunzhi.
The capital has just passed the New Year, and thousands of families are still immersed in the joy of the festival. It snowed heavily Forbidden City that
night. In the middle of the
night, there were no pedestrians on the official road in front of Miyagi. Forbidden City heavy palace doors slowly opened, and Fulin came out from inside.
He had shaved his hair and become a monk, and his expression was solemn, neither sad nor happy. In
this world, there is one less emperor and one more monk who eats fast and prays to Buddha.
Fulin stood between heaven and earth, watching the guards who sent him out of the palace behind him close the palace door again. Once the door was closed, he broke his obsession with the world of mortals for more than 20 years.
He bent over the Forbidden City and bowed three times.
Then he got up and patted the snow on his body, holding the statue of Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva in his arms, and walked step by step in the first snow of the New Year with his back to the direction of the Forbidden City. The
young emperor dragged his old body and left the magnificent Forbidden City without looking back. On
the snow-covered ground, there is only a string of lonely footprints.
Fulin drifted away and soon hid in the wind and snow. There was
only one poem he wrote when he became a monk, which echoed in the cold world.
“The yellow robe was exchanged for the purple cassock, just for the sake of a thought in the past.”
“I was born in the West, but why was I born in an imperial family?”
