From “Need” to “Purpose,” Analyzing the Essence
of Attraction High-Energy Youth Development Notes: 10 Psychological Tools for You
at the Beginning of School Before this article officially begins, I would like to start with an interesting case, which is the real experience of a friend of mine, who already has a girlfriend. I was seduced by a high-level green tea, and then I fell in love with that green tea completely, and then I was severely played and abandoned by the green tea. The whole thing happened because of what Green Tea said to him.
One day, I bought a bottle of water for my friend. When I handed it to my friend, he said, “No, my girlfriend bought me a coke.”
Can you guess how the next sentence of the high-level green tea made my brother fall into it completely?
Here first sell a pass, the back of the article will tell you, can say so, very shameless, but very effective, I hope you can take warning after reading, do not be so easily fooled.
This paper mainly quotes the theories of Alfred Adler and Abraham Maslow, two leading figures in the field of psychology. The purpose is not to trick the opposite sex, but to let you avoid being tricked, to let you know your human weaknesses, to understand your emotions, and finally to achieve self-restraint and become a strong spiritual person.
Now, we start from the underlying logic of psychology, analyze what the essence of attraction is, and then talk about strategies.
First of all, an important question: What is love? What is desire? First of all,
we have to face the reality that your feeling of loving someone is based on illusion. The “true love” before marriage is actually just an illusion. You
might as well recall, what is the feeling of falling in love with someone? You feel that he (she) is the most special person in the world, you feel that he or she will not marry, you feel that you will never meet the person who brings you such a strong impulse-I believe this is the feeling of most people.
In fact, think carefully, this feeling itself is a fallacy in all respects, rationally speaking, how can he (she) be the most special person? How can you be sure that you can’t meet a better and more suitable one in the future? Of course, you are carried away by love, your IQ is reduced to nearly negative, so you can not think rationally, you can only conform to the strong emotional intuition.
The so-called “true love” is just an illusion, or a hallucination, which is an irrational state produced by some chemical reactions in the brain.
The key is, how to create such an illusion for the opposite sex? In other words, how is the opposite sex’s affection for you aroused?
What is desire? There is a simple and crude saying that goes straight to its essence: “What you can’t get is always in turmoil.”. The essence of
desire is that you want to fill yourself, want to possess what you have not yet possessed, want to climb the heights you have not yet reached, and constantly expand your boundaries.
Therefore, the object of desire can only be what you haven’t got yet.
According to Adler’s teleology, all mental suffering is due to your purpose, that is, you want it but you can’t get it. The essence of
liking someone is the pain of wanting to get something but not getting it. In order to get rid of this pain, you have to yearn for the person you can “get”.
We can call the state of unobtainable pain a “negative dopamine state,” and the state of acquired satisfaction a “dopamine state.”.
Dopamine is the essence of positive emotions such as happiness and joy in the biological sense. The essence of something that makes you happy is that when it happens, your brain secretes dopamine-whether it’s winning a prize, passing an exam, getting love, getting a promotion, getting a raise, massage, delicious food, or anything that makes you feel happy, happy, and comfortable, the essence is that the occurrence of that thing makes your brain secrete dopamine. Your pursuit of sex is essentially a pursuit of dopamine.
So the feeling of “like” or “love” is actually your desire to return to the dopamine state when you are in the negative dopamine state, and if this process is related to a person, then your desire will be projected on that person
-literally. All the love in the world is born because of this.
Returning to Adler’s teleology, the reason why this theory is one of the cornerstones of modern psychology is that its scope of application is so wide that most of the causes of human consciousness and behavior can be explained by it. Once
people have a certain purpose, they will pay for it, and if the return does not meet expectations, or the return is not proportional to the pay, people will instinctively continue to pay for it, and will fall into a vicious circle, eventually unable to extricate themselves deeper and deeper.
Take a simple example, Honor of Kings. Why are so many people obsessed with this game? Because the game mechanism uses the matching mechanism to keep your winning rate within 50%, so that after you win a few games, the system will arrange for you to pit your teammates. The essence of
your fascination with the game is that you set yourself the goal of “winning the game” at the beginning and act on it. Once the goal is achieved, you will enter the dopamine state. If the goal is not achieved, you will fall into the negative dopamine state.
In fact, think carefully, even if you win ten in a row, what can you get? Apart from wasting a lot of time, will your savings increase as a result? No, but you can’t help repeating it.
This is the power of Adler’s teleology. Once a person sets up a purpose, he will instinctively get rid of the pain when the purpose is not achieved, and then fall into a vicious circle of constantly serving the purpose, which itself does not need to have any substantive meaning.
To give another example, I don’t know if you have ever had such an experience when you buy online: you like a product, but you don’t really want to buy it too urgently, and even you will hesitate and struggle with whether to buy it or not. Then you finally decide to buy it, so you go to pay for it. By this time, you have begun to fantasize about the feeling of getting it in your hand, but the shopkeeper tells you that it is too popular and has been sold out. How are you feeling
at this time? Do you find that you need this product more? You want it more than ever, so you go to other stores and are willing to buy it even if it’s more expensive.
Why is this happening? It’s because you set a purpose for yourself, and the moment you decide to place an order, you start to serve the purpose and start to fantasize about how to use it, so now you’re in a state of dopamine. But when you think you can get it, you find that you can’t sell it, and the scene you fantasize about will not happen, so you go into a negative dopamine state, and in order to get rid of it, you want it more urgently.
At the same time, the “tension” brought about by the process from the negative dopamine state to the dopamine state is also the key to “addiction.”. We know that “addiction” is the state of negative dopamine when a certain state is not reached, so we have to desire a certain state. But there is also an addiction that targets the process itself from the negative dopamine state to the dopamine state. Just like a bottle of cold cola in a state of extreme thirst on a hot day, the pleasure brought by drinking cola in a normal state is far from being achieved.
For example, in the King of Glory mentioned above, players switch from negative dopamine state to dopamine state between winning and losing, which brings great tension, and this is the reason why people who play King of Glory become addicted, making them repeat the process constantly.
Knowing this, you will know that those couples who seem very unreasonable are actually very consistent with this principle.
Let me give you an example first. This example is the plot of the movie “So Young”. Don’t think that the movie as an example will be out of touch with reality. In fact, the movie comes from reality. It can be said that the director knows the girl’s mind very well. After all, the director is a woman, and the director also said that this is what she really experienced. So I recommend you to see this movie again, it will have a lot of inspiration.
The movie has a plot like this: Zheng Wei (Yang Zishan) and Chen Xiaozheng (Zhao Youting) were originally almost implacable enemies. In order to embarrass Chen Xiaozheng, Zheng Wei found a reason to throw away his meal. After being severely scolded by Chen Xiaozheng, Zheng Wei found herself falling in love with each other and expressed her love to each other.
…
A lot of people feel that this plot is not too abrupt, originally Zheng Wei is to Chen Xiaozheng hate tooth itch, how to suddenly like it? In fact, when you recall your high school or college days, you must have met such an example. For example, how did a girl fall in love with a gangster who often bullied her? How did two people who were originally fighting against each other suddenly turn into flirting? In fact, the arrangement of this plot just shows that the director or scriptwriter is well versed in psychology. If we deconstruct the whole process, you will understand:
how did they make enemies at the beginning? It was because Chen Xiaozheng pushed Zheng Wei down in order to maintain his model. Zheng Wei was so angry that she kept asking Chen Xiaozheng to apologize. Chen Xiaozheng refused to apologize.
Later, on the campus road, Zheng Wei bumped into Chen Xiaozheng again and asked for an apology, which was still rejected.
…
In fact, here, Zheng Wei has already had a “purpose,” because she feels that she has been hurt by the other party. This is a kind of giving, so she wants the other party to apologize. This is to seek feedback, but she has not yet liked it, or here Zheng Wei has not yet felt that this is the feeling of liking. However, Chen Xiaozheng still refused to apologize, that is, he still did not give feedback.
This makes Zheng Wei more anxious, more intense demand for feedback, then how does she solve it? Choosing to hurt each other, intending to achieve psychological balance, she threw away Chen Xiaozheng’s meal. Originally thought that this would be a psychological balance, however, Chen Xiaozheng’s response, let her fall into a greater state of negative dopamine.
… This is what
Chen Hsiao-cheng said to Cheng Wei: I apologize to you. You’ve won. Please don’t appear in front of me again. I don’t know what you want to do. You want to play. Many people like to play with you. But don’t bother me. I don’t have as much boring time and energy as you do, and I don’t have the conditions to waste a bowl of rice like you. This is really annoying.
Chen Hsiao-cheng’s words were extremely destructive to Cheng Wei. First, he denied her character and directly pointed out her state of cynicism. He said, “I don’t have the conditions to waste a bowl of rice like you.” He put himself on the moral high ground and made Cheng Wei feel guilty. Then he said, “Please don’t appear in front of me again.” Cut off the hope of feedback directly.
This passage succeeded in making Zheng Wei fall into a greater negative dopamine state, so that once her roommate mentioned the name of Chen Xiaozheng, she would be furious.
…
However, after the rage, a person walked in the campus, but called the radio station to complain, admitted that he fell in love with Chen Xiaozheng. This is what
Zheng Wei said: Sister Zijuan, I want to know that if I think about a person every day, I obviously hate him very much, but I just want to see him very much. When I see him, my whole nerves are tense, but if I hear him and see him with other girls, my heart is indescribably uncomfortable. I just wanted to cry. I wanted to know what was wrong with me.
…
The whole process is the textbook interpretation of Stockholm Syndrome. To sum up briefly, because of Chen Hsiao-cheng’s reprimand, Cheng Wei was in a state of negative dopamine, such as uneasiness, resentment, and upset. At the same time, it was also because Cheng Wei had set a “purpose” for herself at the beginning. This purpose was to make Chen Hsiao-cheng apologize and make up for her, but this purpose was never achieved, so she fell into a state of great negative dopamine. The only way to get out of this state is to find Chen Hsiao-cheng, so they have a strong sense of need for Chen Hsiao-cheng, and this sense of need will eventually be “alienated” to sexual desire, so they have a strong sexual impulse for Chen Hsiao-cheng.
At this time, some people will be silly to say, then I am not as long as hurt her, can get her heart? Hurt a person
casually, the other side will only think you are neuropathy, to avoid you.
The key is to combine Adler’s teleology, and the starting point of the whole strategy is to let the other party generate its own purpose first. As mentioned before, the purpose itself does not need to have any substantive meaning. It may be due to the curiosity of the other party or the attention of the other party. As long as the other party generates the purpose himself and takes the first step for this purpose, the whole theory will come into effect. How does
the other party take the initiative to create a “purpose”? Here we will introduce Maslow’s hierarchy of needs theory.
…
Maslow is arguably one of the greatest psychologists of the 20th century, as much as Freud, and most people probably don’t have a clear idea of how powerful this hierarchy of needs is. First of all, the motivation of almost all human behavior can be found in this table, but this is nothing, I can also simply conclude that all human behavior is for better survival and better reproduction ah, his real power is to point out that in addition to meeting the physiological and security needs of human beings, all other pursuits are to improve their social value. In the hierarchy of
needs, except for the physiological and security needs at the bottom, the needs at the top are all related to social interaction-people are social. There is also a very important proposition in the hierarchy of needs, that is, there is a vertical relationship between different levels, and the upper level needs must include the lower level, for example, the security needs must include the physiological needs, because the significance of security is that people can better access the physiological needs, and at the same time, it can be said that the realization of the lower level needs also implies the pursuit of the upper level needs. So every need actually implies the pursuit of “self-actualization” at the top. All relationships
between people can be seen as seeking feedback from each other.
Now we can give a deeper conclusion that the essence of “emotion” is the subject’s (me’s) need for the object (a single individual or group) to recognize the subject’s (me’s) social status, which we can call “social identification”. Popularly speaking, I expect you to recognize my social status, whether it is the status of lover between men and women, or the status of relatives or friends.
Then, the above sentence “All relationships between people can be regarded as relationships seeking feedback from each other” can be transformed into: All emotions between people can be regarded as one party’s pursuit of the other party’s (or both parties’ mutual pursuit) recognition of their own social status.
How to understand the above passage? First of all, the premise of the existence of emotion must have a subject and an object. If you are alone on a desert island, no matter how good the living conditions are, it is impossible to give birth to such a thing as “emotion.”. “Self-realization” itself is a sociological concept. All social status must be based on the recognition of others. It can even be said that the essence of social status is a kind of recognition of the subject by the object. It is meaningless for me to say that I am the emperor, but it is meaningful for others to recognize that I am the emperor. Therefore, the essence of the demand for “self-realization” is the demand for the object to recognize the subject (me). And this is also the essence of “emotion.”.
Have you ever thought about how strong our need for “social identification” is? Perhaps many people are very vague about the concept of “social identity.” Here we try to make it concrete. We might as well think about this question. Do you think the pursuit of sex or the pursuit of social identity is dominant in sexual relations? In other words, in your sense of need for your partner, is the need for sex the main one, or the need for social recognition the main one?
Perhaps many people intuitively say that the pursuit of sex is the main thing, after all, like a person is out of sexual desire! But is that really the case? Then
try to answer the following two questions:
1. Are you willing to accept your partner to fall in love with other members of the opposite sex without reducing the time spent interacting with you?
2. If there are two people for you to choose as your partner: one is not good-looking and not so excellent in all aspects, but he will be loyal and single-minded to you; and the other is a male (female) God, but he is a playboy and will have several partners at the same time. But there will be no difference in the time they spend with you. Which one will you choose?
It is believed that most people will not accept the answer in the first question and choose the former in the second question. If you are, the question is, if you feel that the pursuit of sex is dominant, why can’t you accept that your partner has other sexual partners without reducing the time spent with you? There’s no difference in your experience of sex, so why can’t you accept it?
Obviously, your pursuit of sex is not emotionally dominant. What is dominant is the “social identity” of the other person. You want the other person to recognize that you are the only one for him or her.
See, this is the power of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.
If we combine Maslow’s hierarchy of needs with Adler’s teleology, we can explain many emotional phenomena.
For example, there are often stories of female employees falling in love with overbearing presidents. In my experience, I’ve had more than one woman confide in me that she’s in love with her boss and she can’t help it. Their experiences have one thing in common, that is, in the process of interacting with their superiors, they have experienced being scolded, suppressed, encouraged, appreciated and rewarded by their superiors.
This is a typical switch back and forth between negative dopamine and dopamine States. She is eager to be recognized by her boss, and this recognition meets Maslow’s hierarchy of needs at different levels:
first, the boss’s recognition directly realizes the fourth level of “respect needs”, and at the same time, it is linked to her own performance. Performance is also linked to their income, and income is to meet the first and second levels, security needs and physiological needs. At the same time, it is related to “self-realization” at the highest level.
You see, a recognition involves four layers of needs at the same time, so you can imagine how much dopamine it can bring. So naturally, as a female subordinate will be eager to get the attention of the boss, and as mentioned earlier, how strong the dopamine state is, how painful the negative dopamine state is, so the boss’s denial and blame will bring a strong sense of pain and loss, in order to get rid of this negative dopamine state, so they will be more eager for the boss’s affirmation. When their efforts are neglected, they will fall into a negative dopamine state, lose and blame themselves.
Over time, the woman will find herself inseparable from him, and her mind is full of him. There are many
similar examples, such as female students falling in love with instructors, or male students secretly loving female teachers and so on.
If you can’t fit into the above example, then take the “jealousy” that most people have experienced:
If you are a girl, you have a basketball team boyfriend, after winning a basketball game, you are trying to celebrate with him, and find that he is interacting happily with other cheerleading girls; Or you’re a guy who has a goddess girlfriend and finds out she’s talking and laughing with other guys. That’s when you get jealous, right?
I believe many people have experienced similar scenes, and everyone has been jealous, right?
Now ask yourself the first question: Is your need for him or her stronger or weaker at this time?
Believe that everyone’s answer is the same, at this time you will find yourself more strongly in need of each other, for which you even show anger, frustration, do not want to eat and drink, why?
Because at this time, you are in a state of negative dopamine, because you feel that your social identity is going to be lost, this state will be very painful, you will be eager to get rid of this state earlier, so you will be more eager to get the recognition of each other’s social status than before, that is, the third level of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs mentioned above. Only in this way can you get rid of negative dopamine-and this desire will make you need the other person more. Only the other person can make you get rid of negative dopamine and restore normal dopamine levels. The sexual impulse is as strong as your desire.
So you will confront him, ask him to give an explanation, ask him to admit that you are the only one in front of everyone (that is, ask him to admit your social status), and he caters to your request, really does so, you are very touched.
Then ask yourself the second question: Do you like each other more now, or not so much? Anyone who has
experienced it knows that you will find yourself more inseparable from each other, so you will fall deeper, and the next time the same thing happens, the effect will be greater than previous one.
If you understand the above principles, then the process of your attraction to the opposite sex, or the process of your attraction to the opposite sex is very simple:
1, one party actively generates the purpose;
2, one party’s purpose is not achieved, or not fully achieved;
3. This purpose is related to social identification, that is, to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs;
4. One party is often in a state of negative dopamine and dopamine switching back and forth, resulting in “addiction.”.
Now we can go back to the case at the beginning of the article. How was my buddy seduced by a sentence from a high-level green tea?
Many friends have given some answers? Like “Would you mind changing your girlfriend?” “Mind having more than one girlfriend?” But these are essentially direct confessions. If you express your love, the other party will be really happy, and then he will refuse. Because the other person has already got your social recognition and has nothing to ask for from you, he will not think that you are the most special one because of this. How did
the high-level green tea answer? First she hallucinates my buddy, then she destroys him.
She replied, “But my water quenches my thirst.”
This is a sentence that combines offense and defense-this is the power of high-level green tea, which can make you ambiguous, unpredictable, shameless, but very effective. In fact, verbal sexiness is more lethal than physical sexiness, because she has already interacted with you. After the
green tea said this sentence, there is no need to have other actions, my brother himself will add drama to himself, and constantly fall into the black hole of gamblers.
Why is this happening?
The man will be confused at the very beginning: What does this girl mean in the end? Are you implying something? Or are you just talking about this bottle of water?
This seems to give social recognition, but it may not.
At this time, he will start to have a need, or a purpose. What is this need? It goes back to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, so to speak, everyone wants to achieve Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, everyone wants social identification, no matter who it comes from, it’s everyone’s instinct. But it’s important to remember that, as mentioned earlier, the state of being socially identified is not the feeling of liking, but the state of wanting to be socially identified is the feeling of liking, and generally only when you don’t get it.
So the other person will have a need to know the specific meaning of that sentence, out of curiosity, but also out of the desire to know whether their charm has attracted the other person, that is, the third and fourth levels of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.
He wanted to know if the social identification she had thrown out was true? Or is it just a misunderstanding?
And he can’t help but fantasize about green tea. Because he thought it was within reach, he began to fantasize about everything that happened with green tea, and constantly fantasized about the words of green tea.
You see, this is when he goes into a dopamine state, because sexual fantasies can bring a lot of dopamine.
However, there was another voice in his mind telling him that maybe you just thought too much, and he didn’t mean that.
As a result, he fell into a state of negative dopamine.
Look, the woman doesn’t have to do anything, and he starts switching back and forth between dopamine and negative dopamine.
Later, he became more and more entangled, and finally he could not help approaching green tea on his own initiative, in order to find the answer, what does that sentence mean? And this is the establishment of the “purpose.”.
When my buddy went to test her, she directly let my buddy’s “fantasy” be shattered temporarily and told him that he thought too much. So my buddy goes straight into a strong negative dopamine state.
From the dopamine state that he thought was within reach, he suddenly fell into the negative dopamine state of disillusionment, which would make him very painful, and the joy before was false.
My buddy can’t accept such an answer. He will think that green tea is deceiving him and that he is obviously interested in him.
At this time, my brother will be more strongly want to get the social identity
of green tea, so my brother once again fell into confusion, from the original disillusioned negative dopamine state, back to the dopamine state of “maybe there is a chance”.
The above process is constantly repeated, and my brother enters a state of indifference, constantly switching back and forth between dopamine and negative dopamine, and his need for green tea will be constantly “trained” and constantly improved. It was not until he finally begged the green tea, expressed his love to the green tea and made his attitude clear that the green tea let him go and helped him, so they were together.
By this time, my buddy had been “trained” to be inseparable from her. Finally, when I was abandoned by green tea, I regretted it so much that I lost all hope and wanted to die. The key to the
whole process is to let one party actively generate its own purpose. As mentioned earlier, the “purpose” itself does not need to have any substantive meaning, as long as it is generated by the subject himself, then he will serve it.
Similar examples are numerous. If you are a man, I believe you must have experienced such a thing: one day you see a super beauty on the road, you pluck up the courage to chat up and ask for contact information, but the other side is cold to you, or even tell you to “roll”, will you get into trouble? Can’t you sleep all night because you don’t want to eat? No, you will find it a very interesting experience, and you will not fall into it, because the other person has dismissed you from the beginning, and you have decided from the beginning that you will not get any feedback from her.
So when do you get into it? It is you who begin to set goals for yourself, creating the illusion that you might have a chance. Maybe it’s because of the courageous chat up and she responds to you, maybe it’s a cup of milk tea for her, maybe it’s an escort, a companion, etc., or even just an eye contact on the way, you begin to wonder if the other person has the same heartbeat feeling as you, this is the “purpose”, once you take the first step for this purpose. Adlerian teleology kicks in, and you’re not far from beyond redemption.
Back to the beginning of this article, this article is not for you to learn to trick others, but to avoid being tricked.
Lovelorn person, all your pain through the heart, the essence is to face their own pay meaningless reality unwilling. A few days
ago, I received a consultation from a fan, probably meaning that after so many years with her husband, she felt that her husband did not love her as much as before. She began to suspect that the other party was cheating on her, but she felt more and more dependent on the other party. A little neglect from the other party would make her feel anxious, so she quarreled many times, but the woman still could not get rid of this state.
In fact, such examples are not uncommon. As mentioned above, there is a high probability that one party in love will be black and blue. Because it is impossible for both sides to be in love all the time, after a period of time, the relationship will inevitably enter a recession period and reach a stable period. And often at this time, there must be one party will fade earlier, to two people at the same time synchronous fade in probability is impossible, there must be one party earlier fade.
That’s when the problem arises, if you’re the one who hasn’t faded yet, because of the fading of the other person, you’re in a negative dopamine state of fear of social identity loss. You start to get nervous, you start to get scared, you start to get the illusion that you can’t live without each other, and the reason for this illusion is that you’re in a strong negative dopamine state.
At this time, you tend to ask the other party for social recognition more strongly, and at the same time, you will pay more, you will question, press, begin to doubt, and fall into a vicious circle of constant reinforcement.
So you will be depressed, you will be sad, and you will lose your temper over a little thing. The other party will be at a loss and will choose to escape. If
you try to substitute, if you come home every day, instead of a warm smile, you are faced with complaints and questions, will you have the desire to stay there?
If you press forward step by step, you will only push the other party away. Those who did not have an affair may have an affair. That’s how a lot of marriages end.
In fact, it is not that you are not worthy of him, or that you are not good enough, but that you happen to be on the side where the recession period comes slowly, and the other side does not synchronize with you. If the roles are reversed, your recession period comes earlier, then the other side has a strong dependence on you, and you are the one who is relied on. Such a situation may also occur before marriage.
Back to Adlerian teleology itself, all the spiritual suffering in the world is due to the failure of the purpose set by oneself. So you will be unwilling to constantly compete with yourself, which is the weakness of human nature. The real winners
in the emotional world are those who can restrain themselves, not let themselves fall into human weaknesses, and maintain spiritual independence and strength-if you can do so, then you will no longer rely on others, and others will instinctively rely on you.
I can tell my female compatriots a secret about men. This secret is a conclusion drawn by many of my friends and some psychological researchers. Almost all men propose to women out of “insecurity”.
This refers to the active proposal. In addition to the active proposal, there is also a passive proposal. On the surface, a man proposes to a woman on his own initiative, but in fact, it is under pressure from all sides, such as family pressure, or pressure from the woman. The
initiative to propose is that the man wants to propose to the woman from his heart.
And the motive is actually “insecurity.” In fact, it is the feeling that you can’t control this woman. You feel that this woman actually doesn’t need you, and that one day she will probably be taken away by a better man. Out of this fear, you strike first and tie her to your side first. The woman who
can let the man do so must be strong and independent in spirit. Because the man does not feel the dependence of the woman, he will naturally be more eager to get the social recognition of the woman. How do
we become that person?
First of all, we must face the reality that life is a journey of constant “loss.” You will lose your childhood, you will lose your youth, your children will say goodbye to you and go out to live alone, and even the other half who loves you most will die one day, and you will eventually go to loneliness. Life will always be full of regrets, learn to adapt to it in advance, get used to it. All the pain of
human beings is due to trying to fight against the doomed fate. Your unwillingness makes you unable to calm down and experience the beauty of every stage of life. Maturity is the process of “reconciliation” with oneself. The person
you meet will only become a passer-by in your life, no matter how big the spark is, but there is just a way for her (him) to accompany you. Why not try to manage it, be grateful for it, and let this experience be the witness of your life. Open
your hands and you own the world.
In this way, you can become a strong and rich person, a person who is not happy with things and not sad with oneself, a person who has abundant vitality to be grateful to those who deserve gratitude, to love those who deserve love.
Here, I wish you can be that kind of person.
Author: Dry Goods Logic
Record No.: YX01zPLQYeGYkdW2v How many steps do
ordinary people need to seek professional psychological counseling services?
High-Energy Youth Development: 10 Psychological Tools for You
at the Beginning of School, Xiong Qixi Festival, etc.
