Is there a novel about the female protagonist abusing the male protagonist?
I loved him for seven years, but we were only together for two years.
Now, I’m breaking up with him.
Because I know that he has never had me in his heart. After the
breakup, everyone was asking me to get back together, but it was too late.
Late affection is worse than grass.
I want to break up with Chi Mo. After sitting at the night snack stall
with my best friend and drinking a few mouthfuls of beer, the night wind blew, and I had this idea in my mind.
This is not a sudden idea, but an answer after a long time of deliberation. Chi Mo and
I knew each other for seven years. I chased him for five years. We didn’t get together until the fifth year. But after two years together, I suddenly wanted to break up.
I told my best friend about it, and she looked up at me with a puzzled expression.
My best friend looked at me worriedly and said, “Baby, do you have cancer?”?
When I heard my best friend’s words, I couldn’t help laughing.
In fact, I don’t blame my best friend for such a reaction.
Because I used to be so affectionate to Chi Mo that my best friend thought that I would break up with Chi Mo only if I had cancer.
I smiled and said, “It’s nothing. I just don’t think I like it so much anymore.”.
Because I drank and talked more about my worries, when my best friend and I came out of the store, it was already 11:30.
As soon as I helped my best friend to the door of the shop, I saw a black car parked on the side of the road.
Chi Mo is leaning against the car.
Chi Mo was dressed in black, with broad shoulders and narrow waist, and there was a little girl passing by, all of whom secretly looked askance. I looked at him from a
long distance away.
Chi Mo glanced at me and my best friend with an indifferent expression, then straightened up and walked towards us.
For Chi Mo’s appearance, I was quite surprised, because as usual, Chi Mo went to bed at ten o’clock, this time, he had already fallen asleep. Then
I recalled that when I was drinking just now, my best friend took out her cell phone and said she wanted to send a message to someone. I thought she was reporting her itinerary to her boyfriend.
I didn’t expect her to send a message to Chi Mo.
Chi Mo stood in front of me, a pair of eyes swept over my face, he may have seen my face because of the blush of drinking.
He frowned slightly and said, Have you been drinking?
I had known him for seven years, and he frowned and was unhappy, feeling that I had disobeyed him.
As usual, I must have been so nervous that I felt that I had made him angry.
But now I don’t care. A little drunk,
I giggled at him and said, “Yes.”.
Maybe it was because I was too crazy when I laughed with drunkenness, or maybe it was because the smell of alcohol on my body had smoked him.
His frown deepened.
I was smirking, and his face was sullen. The best friend
next to her broke the deadlock with a timely ouch.
My best friend drank a lot of wine just now, and she probably felt very uncomfortable, and now she is humming gently.
Chi Mo also noticed it. He stopped his sullen expression, glanced at his best friend, and said to me, “Send her home first.”.
My best friend drank too much and felt uncomfortable in the back seat alone. I needed to hold her, so I sat in the back seat with her.
When we drove the car downstairs to my best friend’s house, my best friend’s boyfriend was already waiting downstairs.
After waiting for her best friend to go up, Chi Mo, who was sitting in the driver’s seat, said, “Sit in the front.”.
I glanced at the passenger seat, did not resist, and obediently sat in the passenger seat.
I drank wine, took a shower when I got home, and fell asleep on the bed before my hair was dry.
Sleeping in a daze, I felt someone come up to me with a hair dryer to help me blow my hair.
I didn’t say anything and slept more deeply. In my hazy
sleep, I had a dream about the first time I met Chi Mo seven years ago. I was only nineteen years old
at that time. During the summer vacation, I went to my uncle’s bar to do a part-time job. It was
at that time that I met Chi Mo.
I sat at the bar and played with my mobile phone, because it was already past eleven o’clock in the evening, and I was a little sleepy.
While yawning, a tall and thin figure appeared in front of the bar.
He probably saw me wandering and reached out and snapped his fingers in front of me.
His hands were long and white, and his joints were clear. He shook them in front of me. I was so excited that I suddenly looked up. So, 19-year-old Wei Sangsang saw 19-year-old Chi Mo.
From then on, ten thousand years at a glance. When I was
at the front desk of a bar, I couldn’t count the number of good-looking boys I had seen, but when I saw Chi Mo, I was still stunned.
Seeing me in a daze, Chi Mo sneered, took out his cell phone and said, “My cell phone is out of power. Do you have a charging cable that I can borrow?”?
I looked away from Chi Mo’s face and glanced at his cell phone before I came to my senses.
“Yes!” I found my charger, took it out and put it on the bar for Chi Mo.
Chi Mo glanced at the charger with an elusive expression.
He raised his eyebrows, put his cell phone on the bar and said, “I can’t charge it even if you give it to me. You can charge it for me. I’ll get it later.”.
Chi Mo put down his cell phone and left, but I was still stunned. There was a big sister in the
bar who was also a friend of my uncle. When she saw me stunned, she couldn’t help but joke, “Tut, when we Sang Sang see good-looking boys, we are distracted.”.
“I was a little shy. I blushed and retorted,” No.
But my eyes were always staring at Chi Mo’s back. I kept staring at Chi Mo’s cell phone
that night, thinking about when Chi Mo would come back to get it. I was ready to show Chi Mo the good side.
But unfortunately, I didn’t wait for Chi Mo until I went to the toilet once, and when I came back, Chi Mo had already taken the phone away.
That summer vacation, Chi Mo would come to the bar every few days, perhaps because I was about the same age as him, so he would occasionally come to talk to me.
Later, after the beginning of school, I went to the opposite university with my best friend to watch the basketball match. I was surprised to find that Chi Mo was a student of the opposite university. In that basketball match, almost half of the girls were cheering for him. I
don’t know what kind of cramp I had, but when I got back to the dorm, I said to my best friend, “I’m going after Chi Mo!” A prophecy, this chase, chase for seven years.
… I woke up from my sleep, and Chi Mo was no longer with me.
Before that, I would have been disappointed for a while.
But today I felt nothing, I stretched comfortably, and my mood was suddenly very comfortable.
But the voice suddenly came from the living room, I have some doubts, today is not the weekend, it is reasonable to say that Chi Mo should go to work in the company.
When I got up and walked out of the room, I saw Chi Mo who was busy in the kitchen.
Chi Mo is very good at cooking, but he seldom cooks for me.
I followed him from the age of nineteen, unconditionally good to him, and gave him everything I had, but it was not until our fifth year that Chi Mo cooked for me for the first time. That’s when
we officially got together.
But in the past two years, he has been busy with his work as an excuse and seldom cooks for me.
I was still barefoot, looking at him like this, and suddenly I felt a little strange.
Chi Mo just turned around and saw me. He was still holding a spatula in his hand. His expression looked familiar, but when he turned around and saw me, his expression became soft again.
Wake up?
“His expression is gentle:” You go to wash up, breakfast is ready. I have imagined
this scene countless times, and I have been looking forward to it for seven years.
But some things, looking forward to too long, and so on, but not so like.
This breakfast is particularly harmonious.
Chi Mo took one look at me and said, “You have to eat more. You’ve lost weight recently.”.
“I lowered my head and continued to eat, saying,” I have gained weight recently.
Chi Mo was stunned. As if unaware of Chi Mo’s reaction,
I continued, “I was thinner some time ago, but I ate a little more recently and gained three or four pounds.”.
I was thinner before, but Chi Mo didn’t even notice.
Now I suddenly notice that it doesn’t seem to be useful.
Chi Mo’s body froze, and the atmosphere was suddenly a little awkward.
Chi Mo was stupefied for a long time before he spoke again, with a little self-reproach in his tone: “I’m sorry, I’m too busy with my work.”. In the two years we have been
together, I have heard this reason countless times. On
my birthday, he said he was busy with work. He made an
appointment to go to the seaside to play together, and he said he was busy with his work. On the anniversary of being
together, he said he was busy with his work.
I was sick and went to the emergency room in the middle of the night, and he said he was busy with his work.
Over the years, he seems to have spent all his time working.
Before, I would understand, and I would think that he was busy with his work, and I was bothering him with these things, and I was giving him trouble.
But today, I suddenly don’t want to hear it.
I lowered my head and continued to eat breakfast. My tone was so indifferent that I couldn’t see the meaning. I was suddenly curious. If Su Jiaojiao were with you, would you be busy working all the time?
When I said the name of Su Jiaojiao, Chi Mo’s eyes changed.
He looked at me in surprise. “Why did you suddenly mention this man?”?
I took a mouthful of porridge and said indifferently, She came to me some time ago.
Chi Mo was stunned and did not speak.
Chi Mo rarely showed me emotions other than indifference. At first, I thought he was just a character problem. Slowly, I found that he was indifferent to me because he didn’t care about me. Will
not be angry with me, will not be happy because of me, and will not have fluctuations because of the mention of my name.
Because he doesn’t love me.
But he loves Su Jiaojiao.
Love his childhood sweetheart, love the white moonlight that he was together at the age of eighteen and separated at the age of nineteen.
I always knew that Chi Mo loved Su Jiaojiao, but I had always thought that I could at least have a place in his heart by accompanying him for so many years.
But in the end, I think too much. More than
two months ago, Su Jiaojiao suddenly contacted me from Weibo and said she had something to tell me.
Then we made an appointment to meet offline. I have heard the name of
Su Jiaojiao countless times in the past seven years, but this is the first time I have seen her. A girl with cur
ly hair and a slim slip dress was sitting by the window of the coffee shop, with a beautiful manicure on her hand, and was pulling her cell phone, not knowing what she was looking at.
I stood at the door and confirmed the position with the clerk, which was indeed the same position that Su Jiaojiao had sent me on the WeChat.
This is different from what I imagined.
I am a media worker. There are pictures of me on Weibo. When I was standing at the door, Su Jiaojiao found me.
She put down her cell phone and waved to me.
I walked over, and I talked to her on the Internet, so I didn’t feel too stiff to meet her.
Su Jiaojiao’s style is like those little celebrities in big cities, all famous brands, dressed delicately, but it gives people the feeling that they are very impetuous. When
the coffee was served, she took out her mobile phone and took several pictures to make sure that it was suitable to send to the circle of friends before giving up.
She took a picture, put down her cell phone and looked at me with a subtle expression.
You look better than I expected.
I gently raised my eyebrows as if it were a compliment.
Thank you.
Su Jiaojiao added: I heard a friend mention you before. I read your micro-blog these days and found that you are not quite the same as I imagined.
“” Oh?
What’s different.
Su Jiaojiao said, It’s much better than I expected. I almost laughed when I
heard that.
Over the years, I have been Chi Mo’s licking dog, and I have been ridiculed by Su Jiaojiao and Chi Mo’s mutual friends.
Maybe they think that I am so miserable that I will keep chasing Chi Mo.
But in fact, when I first met Chi Mo, I was not bad.
My family is well off, my grades are good, and my appearance is not bad. After graduation, I opened my own studio to do self-media, and my career is booming.
I’ve been following Chi Mo all these years, and I really like him.
I chuckled and said to Su Jiaojiao, “You are different from what I imagined.”.
I thought that the girl who had made Chi Mo fall in love with her for so many years was so excellent, but now I see that it’s just so so.
But I didn’t say it.
But Su Jiaojiao had probably guessed the meaning of my words. She sneered and said, “But what’s the use of your excellence? The person Chi Mo likes has always been me.”.
I tightened my hand on my knee and tried to suppress my emotions.
This is a problem that I have been afraid to look directly at, but now, this problem and the people with this problem have appeared in front of me, so I have to face it.
Su Jiaojiao’s tone was full of sarcasm and ostentation: Chi Mo and I knew each other when we were ten years old, and we were together when we were eighteen. Even though we separated later, he never put me down. He was with you just because I wasn’t there.
Su Jiaojiao said, I just came back last week. Chi Mo knew that he went to the airport to pick me up.
Last week I knew I wanted to go to the new Japanese restaurant with Chi Mo, but Chi Mo said he had to work overtime, so he stood me up.
Noticing a change in my expression, Su Jiaojiao added, “I know you are very good. Your family is rich, and you are very good yourself. But what can you do? Just because Chi Mo likes me, you will lose.”.
On that day, I was totally confused. On
a hot day, I couldn’t control my cold sweat, and my fingertips trembled slightly.
Su Jiaojiao also listened to the voice message that Chi Mo sent to her.
Chi Mo’s voice came from his cell phone, a gentle tone I had never had before.
He said to Su Jiaojiao, “I will handle our affairs well. I will give you a satisfactory answer. You know, there are people around me now, so you can give me a little time, okay?”?
With a Consultative tone, he was afraid that the other party would not agree.
And Chi Mo has been talking to me all these years, all in the affirmative, without any chance of discussion.
I didn’t understand until this moment that Chi Mo discussed with Su Jiaojiao because he liked Su Jiaojiao and was afraid of losing Su Jiaojiao.
He was tough on me because he was sure I couldn’t live without him, and he wasn’t afraid to lose me.
In the past two months, Chi Mo has been in contact with Su Jiaojiao.
Su Jiaojiao has also been sending me her chat records with Chi Mo.
My mood has also been in the collapse, in the late night when Chi Mo did not go home, I cried alone until dawn.
My seven years of companionship is no match for Su Jiaojiao’s long time no see.
I suddenly feel very tired, and I don’t want to live like this anymore.
It was recently that I suddenly realized that I didn’t have to be silent. When I woke up
one morning, Chi Mo was not by my side.
I did not have the feeling of worrying about gains and losses in the past, but felt very relaxed.
I’m thinking maybe I’m really going to let go of Chi Mo. Chi Mo did not explain anything
about this matter.
He has been like this all the time. In the past seven years, he seldom explained to me.
I’m used to it and I don’t care anymore.
After breakfast, I packed up and went to the studio. After I graduated
from university, I opened a studio by myself, and the development has been very good. Today’s work is not busy. After finishing the work at hand, I rest in my office.
I slept in my lounge for the afternoon and it was late afternoon when I came down.
No one can escape the loneliness of the evening, and I am no exception.
I looked out of the window at the lights of thousands of houses, my mind was still confused, and I groped out my mobile phone to find someone to talk to.
I opened the WeChat and found that Chi Mo also sent me a lot of messages today, he may be explaining, but I did not even click in to see the mood.
I pulled it and sent a crying emoticon to my best friend.
I said, “Baby, I’m lonely. Come out and be with me.”.
My best friend sent me a picture of her in black silk.
My best friend sent me a message: “Sorry, baby, I’m with someone else now.”.
I scolded her in my heart for forgetting righteousness at the sight of sex.
I have a lot of friends, but I have been sticking to Chi Mo all these years, and the focus of my life is on Chi Mo. It’s a little difficult to find someone who can drink and talk about things. It took
me a long time to get back in the office. The rest of the
studio was working overtime, but I had nothing to do today, so after saying hello to everyone, I left.
Suddenly I want to drink.
As I went downstairs, I took out my mobile phone and looked through the WeChat address book to find someone I could drink with.
My studio is in the cultural and creative park. I rented a small Western-style building directly. There is a small garden outside. Outside the garden is the road. When
I went downstairs and looked up, I saw Chi Mo’s car parked on the side of the road. Chi Mo was leaning against the car, with smoke in his fingertips. In the night, the scarlet of his fingertips stood out in the darkness.
I approached him and noticed that there were several cigarette butts on the ground, and I didn’t know how long he had been here.
I walked up to him and smiled. “Why didn’t you tell me when you came?”.
Hearing my words, Chi Mo’s eyes fell for a moment.
I sent you a message, but you didn’t reply.
He opened his mouth lightly, and there was a trace of grievance in his tone. Then
I remembered the dozens of messages he sent on my mobile phone.
I set him on do not disturb. I didn’t tell him.
This is very unusual for me before.
Because in the previous seven years, for a large part of the time, I could not see Chi Mo, I could only send him messages every day, even if he did not reply for several months, I could share them enthusiastically.
Even if we were together later, Chi Mo would reply to me with a word, and I would reply to him with more than a dozen messages enthusiastically.
Sometimes Chi Mo will dislike my annoyance and set me as message do not disturb.
In the face of Chi Mo’s words, I said, “Sorry, I’m a little busy today, so I didn’t look at my cell phone.”. Perhaps
Chi Mo also noticed my abnormality and did not ask any more questions.
He stepped forward very thoughtfully, took my bag and said to me, “Go back to rest when you are tired. I cooked chicken soup for you at home.”. Holding the bag in one hand and holding me in the other,
Chi Mo took me to the passenger seat. He opened the door and let me sit on it. Then he went around to the driver’s seat to drive.
Chi Mo seems to be in a good mood today. He talked to me all the way, from work to making a fool of his colleagues. He even asked me when I would have a holiday and go out to play together.
In the past seven years, every time Chi Mo did something wrong, he never apologized. He only expressed his apology with his enthusiasm.
He will suddenly be nice to me, and I will be soft because of his actions.
This time, he should be apologizing for what happened to Su Jiaojiao.
I looked ahead, there was no fluctuation in my heart, and even replied with a smile.
It seems that there is nothing wrong between us.
I lowered my head, took out my mobile phone to look at the circle of friends, brushed a few times, and saw Su Jiaojiao’s circle of friends today.
She went to an Internet celebrity restaurant to punch in, took a selfie and added the environment of the restaurant to make up the Jiugongge. Chi Mo has already liked the moments he sent
three hours ago.
Over the past two months, I have added Su Jiaojiao’s WeChat, but Chi Mo does not know, Chi Mo has been giving Su Jiaojiao’s circle of friends praise, I have been watching.
Looking at my own WeChat, Chi Mo has hardly given a like to my circle of friends over the years. The fact that
he gave me a like in my circle of friends is so strange that I will save the screenshot when he gives me a like.
But in Su Jiaojiao’s circle of friends, Chi Mo will almost like it.
See, that’s the difference. “Su Jiaojiao’s figure is really good,” I said as I looked through
the circle of friends. When Chi Mo, who
was driving, heard this, he froze for a moment and did not speak.
Over the years, I have always had a tacit understanding with Chi Mo. When I encounter something I don’t want to answer, Chi Mo will be silent, and I will not ask again.
But this time, I don’t want this tacit understanding again.
I held my cell phone in front of Chi Mo, clicked on the photo of Su Jiaojiao, and sighed, “Really, I don’t blame men. I was moved when I saw this figure.”.
Because of my words, Chi Mo’s expression became gloomy.
Chi Mo turned to look at me and called out softly, “Sang Sang.”.
I gave a hum.
Chi Mo continued, I don’t like this.
I looked up at Chi Mo, took the phone back, and said, “You don’t like it but like it?”?
Chi Mo was silent and did not speak. Instead of looking at Chi Mo,
I lowered my head and looked at my mobile phone. While clicking on Su Jiaojiao’s circle of friends, I sighed: “No wonder you don’t like me in my circle of friends. So you like this. It seems that if I want you to give me a like, I have to change my style..” I am engaged in we-media, and what I know best is the strange spirit of Yin and Yang.
I’m just trying to provoke Chi Mo.
I wanted to wait for Chi Mo to quarrel with me as usual. He scolded me with a cold face and finally said, “I am such a person. If you can’t stand it, then separate.”.
Then I can follow his wishes and say, “Well, let’s separate.”.
I waited for Chi Mo to say what he used to say, and then I could say what I’ve been wanting to say lately.
But this time, Chi Mo was silent for a long time, but said nothing.
I can feel the low pressure on him.
But when he spoke again, the low pressure that made me feel oppressive disappeared.
Chi Mo turned his head to look at me, gave a very gentle smile, and said, “I don’t like Sang Sang’s Moments because I read it very carefully every time, and then I forgot to like it.”.
I looked at Chi Mo and did not speak.
This kind of lie, he can also say, is really difficult for him.
Our relationship has been maintained in this way.
The days are almost the same as before. I go to work every day, cook for him when I come home, greet him when he comes home, and give him slippers.
Even my best friend thought that what I said before that I wanted to separate from Chi Mo was just a joke.
But only the two of us know that we are already seemingly divorced.
There are a lot of things that are not the same.
For example, I will not expect him to get off work as before, I will not wait for him to rest and arrange his schedule, and I will sacrifice my personal time in order to cooperate with his schedule. I
used to go home after work, and occasionally I would rush home in the middle of a party with my colleagues when I got a call from him.
Before, I would try my best to be nice to him, for fear that I would reveal a little coldness, which would make him feel my passionate love for him.
Before. That was before.
Now I want to live my life better. After dinner
that day, I sat in the living room and painted my nails while watching TV.
Chi Mo doesn’t watch variety shows, so when I watch TV, he usually goes to his room or study to do his own thing.
But this time it was unexpected. Shortly after I sat down, Chi Mo sat next to me.
I was a little surprised, but I didn’t show it. I continued to paint my nails on my feet. The light in the
living room was very dim, and the bright light of the TV screen hit us.
I was sitting on my side on the sofa, and I could see Chi Mo’s side face when I looked up.
Perhaps noticing my line of sight, Chi Mo, who had been silent, suddenly opened his mouth.
This variety show seems to be quite popular. With a hum,
I turned to look at the TV, where a group of young idols and stars were playing games. All of them were young and beautiful, and very pleasing to the eye.
I said, “Yes, after all, everyone likes beautiful things.”.
Chi Mo doesn’t pay much attention to this at ordinary times, and after chatting a few words, he has nothing to say. When
I finished painting my nails, I put my things aside and sat on the sofa waiting for the nail polish to dry.
Chi Mo saw that I was sitting a little far away from him, so he reached out and patted the seat next to him: “Sit over here.”.
Usually, even if he doesn’t say anything, I always find an opportunity to shrink to his side.
But I don’t want to now.
I made an excuse: “My nail polish is not dry.”.
Chi Mo glanced at the nail polish on my feet and said nothing more. The two of
us had nothing to talk about, so we watched the variety show quietly.
I watch it carefully, and I don’t know if Chi Mo can watch it.
After a while, Chi Mo’s cell phone rang suddenly.
He took out his cell phone and looked at it, then frowned.
I noticed it, turned my head and looked at it. Seeing Chi Mo’s expression, I probably guessed what was going on.
I was very discerning, so I stood up directly and said, “I’m going back to my room.”. You
don’t have to think about it to know that it was Su Jiaojiao.
I walked to the room, and as soon as I got to the door, I heard Chi Mo press the answer button and say hello.
My footsteps paused, but I went into the house and closed the door of the room. After
I stayed in the room for a while, Chi Mo knocked on the door of the room. He stood outside the door and said to me, “Sang Sang, I’ll go out and come back later.”.
I gave a hum and only said, “OK, be careful.”. After
Chi Mo went out, I also went out.
Of course, I’m not because Chi Mo went to find Su Jiaojiao heartbroken and then went out to get drunk. I already made an appointment for
this game, otherwise I wouldn’t have painted my nails at night.
The venue was set in a bar with a good environment. There were seven or eight people, men and women, who had a good time because they had known each other for several years.
The only episode was that when I went to the toilet, I took out my cell phone and saw the message Su Jiaojiao sent me.
She posted a photo of Chi Mo standing in the kitchen with his back to her and a message.
She said, “I’m really sorry, because my period is coming and I have a stomachache, so I called your boyfriend to boil brown sugar water for me. You shouldn’t mind.”.
Tut-tut, even the punctuation marks in this green tea quotation reveal a kind of temperament of “hit me if you have the ability.”.
I couldn’t help laughing, and then I replied, “I don’t mind.”.
I didn’t take Su Jiaojiao’s news seriously. I muted my phone and went back to play.
After having a good time, I was a little drunk. At the
end of the game, the boys were responsible for sending the girls home, and those on the way went together. My home was far away, so I asked a male college classmate to send me home.
I walked a little unsteadily. When he helped me to the door, I stumbled. He was afraid that I would fall down, so he grabbed my arm.
I was a little confused, so I pressed the password twice, but I didn’t press it right. When I was about to press it for the third time, the door was opened from the inside. Chi Mo,
who was supposed to cook brown sugar water for Su Jiaojiao at home, stood behind the door, and when he saw other boys standing beside me, his face immediately darkened.
He grabbed my other arm and pulled me into the house, exchanged a few pleasantries with the boy, and took me in.
After drinking a cup of hot water, I woke up a little and went into the bathroom to take a shower. There were people smoking in the
bar, so my hair smelled of alcohol and cigarettes. I took a shower and washed my hair. By the time I finished washing and drying my hair, it was almost one o’clock in the morning.
When I came out of the bathroom, the light in the room had been turned off.
Through the dim light, I could see the figure on the bed.
I groped around to the other side of the bed, and as soon as I sat down, before my buttocks touched the bed, the person behind me suddenly moved.
Chi Mo lifted the quilt, clamped my hand, and pressed down his cool and soft lips.
I wanted to struggle, but I was restrained by Chi Mo.
Chi Mo’s constitution has always been cold, even now it is summer, his fingertips are cold.
His cold fingertips touched my skin and made my body tense.
My whole body was trembling.
I’m scared.
I had always thought that his kiss had taken away my fear of the matter, but until now, he had been rude to me again. The fear
I had been suppressing in the depths of my heart struck me again.
I was suddenly disgusted.
I closed my eyes and calmed myself.
When Chi Mo loosened my lips and kissed me, I said lightly, “Chi Mo, I don’t want to.”.
Chi Mo’s body froze because of my words.
He was still on top of me, but his movements stopped.
I took a deep breath and continued, “Chi Mo, I’m tired today. I don’t want to.”.
I will never refuse Chi Mo, I will not refuse Chi Mo in this matter, even if I am uncomfortable, I will not refuse him.
Over the years, I have been obedient and responsive to Chi Mo.
But I’m really tired.
Chi Mo heard my words and stiffened for a long time.
Finally, he buried his face in my neck, took a deep breath, and said, “I’m sorry.”. So
saying, he stretched out his hand and lifted himself up and got down from me.
He lay on his side beside me and helped me pull down the skirt that had been lifted up. He gently pulled me into his arms and stroked the back of my head with his generous palm.
He held me in his arms, and his movements were not as gentle as he used to be.
He lowered his head and kissed me on the forehead. His tone was gentle. “Be good, go to bed. It’s late.”.
I huddled in his arms, as if suddenly remembering something, and said, Chi Mo.
He gave a little hum.
I added, “If you have anything, just tell me. Don’t lie to me.”.
Chi Mo froze for a moment, and after a while, he reached out and rubbed my head.
Fool.
He said, I do not lie so much to you.
I was really tired, and I didn’t even have the strength to reply to him. I was held in his arms, and my eyelids got heavier and heavier, so I fell asleep.
From beginning to end, he did not explain the matter of Su Jiaojiao.
I think I should go.
When Su Jiaojiao sent me a message again, saying that Chi Mo had made an appointment with him for dinner tonight, I felt that I should pack up and leave him.
Although Chi Mo didn’t say anything, his behavior had clearly given me the answer.
After seven years, his choice has always been Su Jiaojiao.
I persisted for seven years, and I was still the one who was abandoned.
But this time, I didn’t feel any sadness, on the contrary, I just felt more relaxed than I had ever felt before.
Chi Mo went to work in the morning and had dinner with Su Jiaojiao in the evening before he came back. The whole day was enough for me to pack up and leave the house.
I have been chasing Chi Mo for five years and have been together for two years. Every detail of this family knows more about my devotion to Chi Mo than I do. After
I leave, Su Jiaojiao may live in this house, or Chi Mo will sell this house, and then live in a new house with Su Jiaojiao.
When I think about it, I still feel a little uncomfortable. It’s easy to
destroy something. I can move it in a day.
But it’s hard to build something, this home, and I’ve been working on it for seven years.
I packed up my things, called my best friend and her boyfriend to help, and moved them to my best friend’s house first. When
my best friend saw that I was determined to move out, she asked me, “Are you really leaving?”? Without looking back,
I said, “I look like I’m joking. I’ll move my things to your house first. I bought a plane ticket for tonight. Hurry up, or it will be too late.”.
Bestie: Ticket, where are you going?
I walked outside the door, took a deep breath, and said with a smile, I want to be at home everywhere.
My best friend failed to persuade me, so she followed me and closed the door of the house.
The door closed, and my seven years of love and affection came to an end.
It doesn’t matter. I just tore up seven years of seriousness and courage in my life calendar.
…… When I arrived at the airport, it was already nine o’clock in the evening, and Chi Mo was supposed to be having dinner with Su Jiaojiao.
I took out my cell phone and sent a message to Chi Mo.
I said, “Chi Mo, I’m leaving. I put the key on the tea table. I’ve moved my things. I wish you all the best in your future life.”.
I wanted to send the message and then turn it off, but I didn’t expect that as soon as the message was sent, Chi Mo’s phone call came.
I hesitated for a moment and pressed the answer button.
Chi Mo’s anxious voice came: “Sang Sang, what do you mean?”?
You’re leaving?
Where to go?
Why did you leave the key on the coffee table, and what does it mean to move things?
Chi Mo’s questions came in turn, and I didn’t know which one to reply to for a while.
I was stupefied for a moment, then began to say: “I recently thought about it, think we should separate, before you don’t like me, but I like you, so I can always chase you, this chase, is seven years, now you still don’t like me, you like or Su Jiaojiao, my love is also spent in these seven years.”.
Chi Mo’s voice rose a few degrees: “Why mention Su Jiaojiao again? Who told you that I like her..” Before Chi Mo had finished speaking, I opened my mouth and said, I made an appointment with you three times at the restaurant where you are having dinner with Su Jiaojiao now, but each time you said you were busy with your work. Even on our anniversary day, you left me there alone and then worked overtime in the company.
Chi Mo froze.
He probably just remembered now that I had always wanted to go to that restaurant with him.
I so desperately strive for but can not get things, Su Jiaojiao just a light word, you get.
I said, “Chi Mo, in fact, maybe we are not suitable for each other. In the past seven years, I have been pestering you unilaterally. Now, I have put down my obsession, and your Su Jiaojiao has returned. Let’s break up.”. When I
finished, I wanted to hang up the phone, and Chi Mo’s almost collapsed voice came from the other side of the phone. “Sang Sang,”
he said, “it’s not what you think. You, let’s meet and have a good talk after meeting, shall we?”?
I held the ticket in my hand and was ready for boarding time.
I said, “No, I’m ready to get on the plane.”. After
a pause, I added, I’ve done my best this time, so I don’t have any regrets.
With these words, I hung up my cell phone and turned it off.
In fact, I have never forgotten that Chi Mo was not good to me, but I loved him at that time, so I selectively ignored those bad things.
My love covered up those things in the corner, but when my love for him became less and less, the hurt, the moments of being treated coldly, the disappointment and loneliness, the principles lowered again and again in order to cater to him, all of them seemed to find a vent and burst out.
Standing in the airport waiting room, I watched people coming and going. From then on, there are still many stories in the world, but there will be no more stories about Wei Sangsang and Chi Mo.
Goodbye, twenty-six-year-old Chi Mo.
Goodbye, once Wei Sangsang.
I changed a phone card, changed a WeChat, and only added a few familiar friends.
I was originally from the media, and it is not a problem to ask for a leave to rest for a few months.
I’ve always wanted to be a travel blogger, but I’ve been limited by Chi Mo before, because I’m afraid of losing him, so I have to give up my dream. After I separated
from Chi Mo, I embarked on the road of being a travel blogger.
In just two months, I made my travel blogger account more than one million followers, and advertising came one after another, and I made money while playing. All the way
from the south to the north, I came to Hohhot. I was sitting in a coffee shop on the street cutting films when I received a phone call from my best friend.
My best friend sighed helplessly, and I could feel her helplessness across the screen.
My best friend said, “Chi Mo came again and asked me where you were. I said I didn’t know. He moved your things back, and I couldn’t stop him.” My hand paused, and then I continued to tap on the keyboard.
Forget it, my things are not valuable.
My best friend: Baby, you are handsome now. I am the one who is suffering. He came to my house when he was drunk. I talked to my boyfriend and he didn’t go back. My neighbor just moved here. He thought I had two feet.
This is really something I didn’t expect. I originally thought that Chi Mo would make up for it in the first few days, but I didn’t expect that after two months, he was still holding on.
Chi Mo is a typical Gemini, love is love, not love is not love. I have deeply felt this
in the five years when I pursued him.
But now I wonder what he means by doing this.
I looked at the computer screen and thought for a moment, but I couldn’t figure it out, so I stopped thinking.
I said to my best friend, “If he bothers you, you can call the police directly. Anyway, I don’t want to go back recently.”. For
the next few months, I didn’t hear from Chi Mo again.
My condition is getting better and better, and my career as a travel blogger is getting better and better. In half a year, it has risen to more than three million fans. It has been half a year since I returned to that city
again. When
I came out, it was midsummer, and when I went back, it was already winter.
I spent a comfortable year at home. I broke up suddenly and went out to play for more than half a year. My parents complained a lot, but after seeing me black and thin, the complaint turned into heartache. On the fifth day of
the Lunar New Year, my best friend said there was a game and asked me to go out to play together.
I have been outside for half a year, and I hardly have any contact with my friends. After I received a phone call from my best friend, I went out.
But I didn’t expect Chi Mo to come.
I sat in the corner of the KTV box and watched everyone play. When Chi Mo appeared at the door, I felt everyone was quiet.
No one said, but I could feel that Chi Mo’s appearance was arranged by them. I haven’t seen him for
half a year. Chi Mo has lost weight and looks more melancholy. He has always been a big boy who looks meticulous before, but now he looks much more mature.
I glanced at him and looked down.
Chi Mo sat down beside me and said softly, “Long time no see.”.
I gave a hum and did not speak. It’s
not that I don’t want to talk to him, but I really have nothing to say.
Because of Chi Mo’s appearance, I didn’t play all night. At ten o’clock in the evening, my mother called me and asked me to go home earlier.
My best friend was having a good time. I picked up my coat, said to my best friend, and then went out. As soon as
I left, Chi Mo followed me.
He said, “Let me take you home.”.
I refused.
My home is less than one kilometer away from this KTV, and I can get home by taking a walk.
But Chi Mo didn’t listen. When I left the KTV, he followed me silently and followed me all the way home. I
knew I couldn’t get rid of him, so I let him follow. On the fifth day of the
Lunar New Year, the weather was still cold. I covered my face with a scarf. Chi Mo followed me. He wore a black windbreaker and looked tall and good-looking.
But the way he hung his head behind me, he looked a little pathetic.
At the gate of my neighborhood, Chi Mo suddenly stopped in front of me. He looked at me with reddish eyes.
He said, Sang Sang, come back, I need you.
I looked at him and did not speak. When we were together
before, he also mentioned it. He said, Sang Sang, I need you.
Yes, it’s need, not love.
Separated for more than half a year, I just feel ridiculous when I hear this sentence again.
I said, “You should be with someone you love, not someone you need.”.
Chi Mo was stupefied, as if he understood that his expression was wrong, so he changed his tune and said, Sang Sang, I love you. Come back. When
he said this sentence, the ending sound was slightly trembling.
In our relationship, Chi Mo, who had always been on the winner’s side, suddenly became humble at this moment.
Chi Mo seemed to be deliberately suppressing his emotions. He looked at me with red eyes and said, “Su Jiaojiao and I are not the relationship you imagined. I did like her before, but that was before. When I was a senior in high school, I went home with her. On the way, I met a robber. It was her mother who appeared and saved us.” But her mother was stabbed and died. She was a single-parent family. After her mother died, she was the only one left.
I looked at Chi Mo and did not speak.
Chi Mo’s voice trembled more and more. She left after the
college entrance examination. I haven’t been able to get in touch with her all these years. She came back to me more than half a year ago because she had difficulties in life. She wanted to be with me again, but I just wanted to be with you, so I wanted to help her deal with the difficulties in life and let her not disturb us. By the time he said this, Chi Mo’s voice had begun to choke.
Chi Mo said, “The day you left, I went to dinner with her because that day I gave her a sum of money to leave the city.” I know.
I suddenly opened my mouth. I looked at Chi Mo with a smile in my eyes. When I came back, I saw Su Jiaojiao in Shanghai.
The girl, who had been cocky in front of me before, said to me with red eyes, I always thought that if I threatened him about my mother, he would be with me, but I was wrong. This time, I lost.
Chi Mo’s eyes moved slightly. He looked at me. He longed for me to change my mind.
His tone became cautious: “So, Sang Sang, can you come back to me?”?
I exhaled and glanced up in the direction of my house. I said, It’s time for me to go home.
When I said this sentence, the light in Chi Mo’s eyes went down a little bit.
I walked over him and took a few steps. I looked back and saw Chi Mo standing there with his head down.
Many years ago, I have been following Chi Mo, where he is, where I am.
At that time, I felt very happy as long as I could follow him. Now,
many years later, I look at his back, but there is no feeling at all.
I withdrew my gaze and headed home. For the
next few days, Chi Mo will come to my door. The atmosphere of the
New Year is still there. Mom and Dad go out for a walk every day and meet Chi Mo several times.
Because I told my parents that I didn’t want to have anything to do with Chi Mo anymore, but my parents were still soft-hearted.
That day I came out of the room after taking a nap. As soon as I came out of the room in my pajamas, I saw Chi Mo sitting on the sofa.
I was stunned when my mother came out of the kitchen and explained to me in a panic, “It’s raining outside, and it’s not good for Xiaochi to get wet in such a cold day.”.
I said, “Oh,” but I didn’t say anything. He poured
himself a glass of water and went back to his room.
Mom saw me ignoring people and ran to my room to scold me.
“Breaking up is breaking up. You have to be polite. During the Spring Festival, he brought gifts for me and your father.” I sat in front of the computer watching a variety show and said, “If he’s polite, he won’t bother me. Besides, it’s not me who receives gifts.”.
Chi Mo stayed at my house until dinner time, when his parents left him for dinner.
At the meal time, the three of them sat around the table, and I swaggered past them with my bag on my back.
I said, “I won’t eat at home. I’ll go to my friend’s house to play.”. It wasn’t enough for
Chi Mo to stay at my house. After the New Year, I went back to work in the studio, and Chi Mo began to move to the studio. The people in the
studio all know Chi Mo, so it’s easy for Chi Mo to buy them. Every day, Chi Mo will buy milk tea and snacks for everyone.
The whole studio has become a lobbyist for Chi Mo, and they are all trying to persuade me to get back together with Chi Mo.
My answer is always, “Whoever eats the snacks will get back together.”. My career as a
travel blogger is booming, and I’m going to start traveling again after the New Year.
I don’t know who told Chi Mo that I was going to travel.
Chi Mo ran to my house downstairs and called me. I don’t think it’s a problem to drag on like this. It’s always going to be solved.
So he went downstairs and made it clear to Chi Mo.
Chi Mo drank the wine and his eyes were slightly red. When he saw me, he couldn’t hold back. “Sang Sang, how can you forgive me? I can do anything..” he said. I interrupted Chi Mo before he had finished speaking.
Chi Mo.
“I said,” It’s late. Go home.
Chi Mo raised a pair of eyes to look at me, and his eyes were full of pleading and humility. It’s
not too late, we.. I’m not talking about time.
I interrupted him again in a firm tone. I said it was too late.
Chi Mo was stunned and did not speak again.
Yes, everything is too late, the past seven years, consumed too many things, consumed my deep love for Chi Mo.
Time is still going on, but some things have long been left in the past.
I turned around and said to Chi Mo, “Go home and never see you again.”.
I looked up at the sky. The moon was shining brightly, and the lights of thousands of families were rising in front of me.
In fact, in the past six months, I also want to understand that the reason for my separation from Chi Mo is not Su Jiaojiao.
It’s me, who is more and more sober, and him, who has been indifferent to me for the past seven years.
I should go forward, the things that have happened, and the people who have had a relationship, should stay in time.
I used to love Chi Mo very much, but as time goes by, birds and fish always go different ways.
That’s it. It’s time to start a new life. End of
full text. Focus on not getting lost ~
