One day his brother got drunk at the table and pointed at my nose and said to me:
“You’re stupid. You think your husband likes you? I’m sorry.
“He first got married to someone else, and he gave you the proof, okay? I’m sorry.
I fell in love with him when I met him first.
I gave him the little sun because he laughed like my sun.
How do you describe Song Shui? He’s like another me in the world.
He knows what I like to eat and what I like to watch.
We’re doing it the same way, getting up in the morning and brushing our teeth in the mirror and he brushing his teeth and touching my head.
I cook, he washes my dishes.
Even at night, he was familiar with my position and locked me in his arms.
He’ll give me a big bag of paper when he’s off work, telling me he’s got a hot-fire puff downstairs.
“A cloud, you’ll definitely love it. I’m sorry.
One.
When Song Shui smiles, there are two pear vortexes in his mouth.
He always knew my preferences and shared all the links with me.
One day he said he saw a diamond ring on his way to work.
I asked him what he was like.
He said wait a minute.
Saying: ‘Whether you marry me or not, I will call your wife. I’m sorry.
Two.
I remember the day Song Shu and I signed up, the weather wasn’t so good.
We wore a white shirt together and spent $50 on that wedding picture.
Actually, I remember very well when I got out of the Civil Administration.
He’s staring at Red Ben. He’s got a lot of money.
I asked him what happened, didn’t regret it, and he grabbed me up.
Two adults, I’m a little embarrassed in front of the Civil Administration, so he can put me down.
And he put his chin in my neck and he said:
“Happy wedding, my baby wife. I’m sorry.
3
“The newlyweds are sweet. I’m sorry.
My colleagues were holding their chins on me.
As Song Shu has been picking me up at my company for the last few days, he’s familiar with it.
I was in a red rush to put the notebook in a bag, making a gesture to zip my mouth.
He ran to Song-Shu in a “Yo, shy” scene.
I don’t know.
“Run slow. I’m sorry.
He patted me in the head and pulled me away and asked me how I could volunteer to work overtime when I was in a six-hour company.
I whispered to him about the boss and said something funny, and we laughed together.
It’s like being around Song-Shu is happy.
He turned his eyelids and hid my messy hair behind his ears.
The handles were broken before the house, and after I finished eating, I took the new handles and put them in his waist and invited him to play games.
Two shots, he wouldn’t let me at all, and the man who was manipulating was almost holding my hammer.
I was so angry, he took his foot, he grabbed me by my ankle.
Put me on the couch.
“It’s no fun to play games. How about something else? I’m sorry.
4
The other day, he called me and said:
“Honey, there’s a new ice cream shop downstairs, and I brought you strawberry sea salt, so we’re going to eat the last northeast dish that we didn’t book, and we can watch the comic film we’ve been wanting to see at night. I’m sorry.
I said yes. You’re on your way to work. I’ll be at home.
I waited for him that day.
He didn’t come back until it was all dark.
Of course, no northeast food, no amphibious movies, and the box in his hand was full of strawberry sea salt ice cream.
He was a mess, and I held him, so I smelled his wine.
“Why are you drinking? I’m sorry.
He pushed me away and flushed me into the toilet.
“…”
That’s probably the first time he’s locked himself in a quarantine.
He’s been ringing his cell phone in the shoe cabinet.
Strange number, call again and again.
I hesitated for a long time to finally pick up my cell phone and drop the listening key.
The sound of tears coming out of hand.
“Song Si, Song Si, I regret, can you come back to me again…”
I was panicking and hung up.
It’s a woman I don’t know.
5
He locked himself in the toilet for almost two hours.
Finally, I stood in front of the toilet door and knocked.
“I’m going to bed, Song Si, don’t stay in there too long. I’m sorry.
“…don’t make me worry about you. I’m sorry.
He didn’t answer me.
Actually, I can’t sleep.
I wasn’t even in the mood to play my cell phone, and I was thinking about him, and I was the first one who couldn’t hold it.
Good thing he wasn’t in the bathroom all the time.
On the couch in the living room, there was no light, and the window on the balcony was open, so the light came in.
He’s like a black shadow on the couch.
I walked in front of him and he slowly looked up.
Look at me, half-wit, barely holding up the horn.
“Get dressed, clouds, don’t catch cold. I’m sorry.
He doesn’t sound like him.
I looked at him in front of him, and he was up all night with red blood in his eyes, staring at the carpet, and I had a heart attack.
When my hand was on his back, he pulled his hand off.
I felt the cold and cold of the moment.
“I went for a walk. I’m sorry.
He stood up and walked without hesitation.
“Songsu! Now what time are you going to go where? I’m sorry.
I called him behind him and only the sound of the door closes to me.
I fell in the sofa and turned on the TV.
The switch was made and the remote control was thrown back to the carpet on a comedy show.
He played the old man, and all the batteries in the back fell out.
Song Shu has never done this to me.
It’s probably the first time he’s explained nothing to me, the first time he’s ignored me, the first time he’s ever ignored me.
He doesn’t want to be in the same room as me, I know.
Because of what, because of the phone that kept ringing?
Because of that crying girl.
I just realized I like Song Shu so much.
But I don’t even know who he used to like.
Six.
Then I had a bad time.
It was all about Song Shu who ran away from home last night, or dreamt that he was carrying a girl home, or that he told me we were getting divorced.
Until the door opens and wakes me up.
I thought about what I should say to him many times when he came back, and I thought I’d say to him, “Yo, I can get back,” and I just looked at him and stood up to the bedroom.
I think I’m a little tired.
He followed me all the way to the bedroom and he put me on the doorboard.
“Windun, I’m sorry, it’s my fault. I’m sorry.
His voice is born lazy, and he wears a favor when he talks.
I broke his hand on my waist.
“Nothing bad. People need a little room alone. I’m sorry.
“You’re angry. I’m sorry.
His words, not a question, a yes.
“So what?”
“So I’ll never leave without saying anything. Don’t get mad, okay? I’m sorry.
“…”
I looked down, there was no light in the bedroom, and it was as if it was dawn, and the sky was not bright.
I took a soft breath.
“I’m not mad at you not to say anything. I’m sorry.
“I’m just afraid I’ll never find you after you say nothing. I’m sorry.
“I’m just afraid of that, you’re not coming back. I’m sorry.
“I am…”
I’m probably a sensitive person, so I cry when I say something, and I don’t know what to say.
And he was in a state of panic, rubbing his sleeves off the tears on my face.
Put me in my arms.
“Don’t cry, cloud, huh?”
“Whatever you want me to do, don’t cry. I’m sorry.
“You cry and I feel bad, you know…”
7
Song Shu came back from outside and brought me breakfast.
It’s all I love. He remembers everything I like.
And I held the chopsticks to stir up the silk, and looked at him with my lips on his face several times, and he stretched out his hand and put my hair in the soup.
“What do you want to ask? I’m sorry.
“Song Suk. Last night, someone called you. I’m sorry.
“I take it. I’m sorry.
Being a partner doesn’t mean we have no privacy.
We don’t normally look at each other’s phones, so when I tell him this, it’s a bit of a lack of air.
He didn’t have an accident.
“Who are you? Ex-girlfriend, right? I looked at him.
I don’t understand why he won’t look at me at a time like this.
“Yeah. I’m sorry.
“Yesterday she came to see you? I’m sorry.
“Hmm. I’m sorry.
“…”
Song-Suk and I, we’ve always been very comfortable.
So he’s like, I’m probably sensitive.
That woman was special to him, not ordinary.
I suddenly came up with a vicious idea that stabbing people in pain, so I asked him.
“Why did you break up? I’m sorry.
He looked at me, and there was something.
“She’s not well, my parents don’t recognize her. I’m sorry.
“So, you’re the ones who got beat up? I’m sorry.
I’m saying I smile first, but I don’t know why it’s so bitter.
“The clouds. I’m sorry.
“Don’t laugh. I’m sorry.
His eyebrow was so lost, he reached over my head and rubbed two.
“You’re my wife, and the first thing I thought about was you. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
I thought that the mountain oath was the most useless thing in the world.
But then I knew that meeting someone you liked was just a thought.
It’s just an empty promise to keep that restless heart alive.
8
I had a feeling about Song Shu’s ex-girlfriend would not be easy to calm down.
When I had lunch, I had a friend’s request.
Validation information: Hi, I’m Ash’s ex-girlfriend. Can we talk?
There’s nothing to talk about.
I turned my hands and sent it to Song Shui. I’m sorry.
..this man, he’s here to talk about him.
“Your ex-girlfriend added my best friend. I’m sorry.
Leave her alone. I’m sorry.
“…”
I didn’t send any more messages to SONG, but I’m still following his ex-girlfriend’s friend’s request.
Soon after, the woman sent me a message.
“Can you divorce Ash? I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
I’ve never seen my current ex get divorced before.
As I opened my eyes, I was able to share this with Song Shu.
He went back to my three points.
And “Be good, delete her and take a nap.” I’m sorry.
…that’s impossible.
“What makes you think I’m going to divorce Song Shu because of you?” I’m sorry.
I’ll keep texting his ex-girlfriend.
‘Cause he likes me, not you. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
I’m so upset by the tone of that, but the damn thing is that last night’s reaction to Song Shu made me feel that way.
As soon as he left work in the afternoon, Song-Soo texted me that he was working late today, so I went home.
It’s even more touching my nerves.
“Come pick me up. I called him one time.
“Something’s wrong with several departments today. I have a meeting to deal with. Will you go home, honey? I’m sorry.
“I promise to go home by 7:30. I’m sorry.
Indeed, he heard loud noises from the microphone, and he was probably able to pick up my phone, and there was a call for his name.
I’m still upset.
“You’re not going out with your ex? Bye!
I hung up on him.
I’m not coming without you.
I grunted. He didn’t come to pick me up and I didn’t want to go home.
I followed my colleagues to the barbecue.
I was pushed into the corner and I couldn’t bear it.
It’s open from time to time, nothing.
Before, if I hang up on him, he’ll call me again.
But today he didn’t.
Never.
8
I feel someone standing in front of me.
You can’t look down on your head if you try to figure out who it is.
Well, he got down in front of me.
And We sought to focus on his dark eye, until he reached out a finger over my forehead.
“How much have you been drinking? I’m sorry.
Then he picks up the empty bottle on the table and looks at it.
“Bri-Wi, didn’t you say the last thing you wanted to do with the Budweiser? I’m sorry.
“That’s too much to drink. I guess it’s tomorrow. I’m sorry.
He pulled me up and put me in his arms, and I grabbed his collar and smelled it, and there was no smell of women’s perfume.
“Why are you here? I’m sorry.
“Come to see you. He answered peacefully.
I’ve got a lot to ask him, but I don’t know how to ask him, like why you didn’t call first. I, even after drinking, feel like I’m dying.
He broke out of his arms, and he grabbed my hand in another way.
Ten fingers.
“You drove here, Song Shu?”
“Hmm. I’m sorry.
“I’m a little carsick. I’m sorry.
“Is it something new today? I’m sorry.
“…I’ve been dizzy since I drank! I’m sorry.
Well, I felt light, and then I found out that he really picked me up.
Song Shu!
I got a feeling of weightlessness around his neck, and his hands were on my waist.
“Damage.” Can I take you back? I’m sorry.
“…”
“Hey, Song Si.”
“Hmm? I’m sorry.
“Say something. I’m sorry.
“What do you want to hear? I’m sorry.
“You and your ex-girlfriend stories. I’m sorry.
He probably knew I was coming. It was no accident.
“There’s nothing more to say than to tell you. I’m sorry.
“I fell in the water with her. Who do you save first? I’m sorry.
“Save you. I’m sorry.
“Save me first”?
“Just save you, I won’t save her, okay? I’m sorry.
“…”
It’s a little cold at night. I shrunk. I don’t like the smell of wine on me, but Song Shu smells good.
“Give me your coat.”
Cold? I’m sorry.
“Hmm. I’m sorry.
I was put down, he was crouching in front of me and zipped his slightly large coat all the way up.
I looked down at him. He’s got a little sweat on his forehead.
“Shall I carry you?”
He was going to get down in front of me and I grabbed his hand.
“No, I can walk by myself. I’m sorry.
“Yo, what’s wrong with your husband? I’m sorry.
He’s got a little charade in his tone, and I’ve been told he’s got a red cheek.
He came after me, reached out and rubbed my hair twice.
9
It’s been in my ear lately.
I’m actually in the middle of the third.
I don’t know if it’s from that ex-girlfriend.
I went home Saturday shopping, and I got hit by a kid.
“My mom says you’re the fox that seduces people. I’m sorry.
The kid made a ghost face and ran away.
“…”
I went upstairs with no words and no reason, and I saw a woman standing at the door.
It’s the first time I’ve looked at Jossin carefully.
Song Shu’s ex-girlfriend, more beautiful than I thought.
The beauty of the weak wind and the disease, it feels like it’s gonna break.
She does seem to have the capital she can take back.
“Get out of the way. I’m sorry.
I looked at her and raised my hand to open a fingerprint lock.
“I don’t want to argue with you, so Miss Chan, can you give me Song Shu?” I’m sorry.
Her tone is as weak and arrogant as the phone.
I was suffocating, “I already told you, it’s impossible. I’m sorry.
“His first love was me. He loved me so much. What do you think you could rob me? I’m sorry.
She’s getting a little emotional and she’s getting a little red-eyed.
“I’m sorry, I have a marriage certificate with him. I’m sorry.
I didn’t mean to stab her in pain, but it was clear to her that it was a blow.
She was shaking.
Then there was some hysteria.
“Why, I have nothing left, why did you take Ashi away from me? I’m sorry.
“He’s mine, he’s mine…”
She kept saying, “I’m a little tired, the door was opened and I wanted her to stop crying at my door.”
Who knows when she falls, “Ah! You pushed me…”
And then he cried so patheticly.
She fell pretty hard. I was just trying to pick her up and asked if she needed me to book a brain doctor for her.
Song Shu doesn’t know when he’s standing behind us, and he helped me with a dish I’m carrying.
No way. Twenty-first century.
This woman is still playing that game.
10
She looked like I’d never seen her before, but she kept staring at Song-Shu.
SONG Shu was just bowing his head and pulling my food. I’m sorry.
Totally ignored her.
Women can’t believe they stare at us, and Song Shui took my waist and pushed me inside.
“Wait, Song-Suk!” The woman rises up and grabs Song-Suk’s wrist.
“Are you sure you don’t want me?”
Her eyes were red, her red lips shivering, she pretended not to pretend, and she was desperate.
“You said you’d never leave me. I’m sorry.
“Song Si, only you can save me…”
It’s actually the first time I’ve ever seen an irritation in Song Shu’s face.
He who laughs at everyone, and he who looks like Song Shu of the little sun, will lose himself only because of a woman.
He threw away a woman’s hand.
“Joseph, can you grow up? I’m sorry.
“Many things you have to face, I’m not the one who can save you. I’m sorry.
“And don’t harass my wife. I’m sorry.
The moment I closed the door, I saw the woman slip down.
And when he fell, he looked up at me, and there was a burning hatred.
Eleven.
“Frightened? I’m sorry.
The door was closed, and I didn’t slow down.
He put me in his arms, and I let him hold me, and I followed my hair.
“Sorry, Cloudy.”
“…”
I stare at the floor and suddenly my nasal cavity is sore.
“Song Si, tell me, is this decision to marry you really right? I’m sorry.
He took me in his arms almost.
“I won’t let you go. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
Jossing also harass Song Shu, I know.
Finally, it seemed like it was 110 to calm things down, and since then Jossin hasn’t been in our lives for a long time.
I also learned about them from my former friends in Song Shu.
Song Shu’s parents are not satisfied with Josshin.
But Song Shu never wanted to break up with her. She climbed an old bed first.
Song Shu has since been depressed and has been placed with me by his family.
So you see, that’s why Jocelyn thinks he’ll win.
Even my meeting with Song Shui was thanks to her.
12
“Song Shu, we’re organized to climb the mountains in Yangzhou. Can you take your family? I’m sorry.
I took the pot to the living room and Song Shu was counting on the couch.
“Go on, honey. I’m sorry.
He smiled and held his hand on my cheek.
It has been a few days since then, and Song Shu has been trying to get me to forget about the unpleasant things, I know.
And I slowly think that the day is going to be better, on the one hand, because of the absence of an interference between us, and on the other, because of myself.
I have a good thing to say to Song Shu.
I don’t know.
During the evening, Song Shu was packing our bags, and I came to the door of the house in a hurry.
Song Shu!
I waved at him, and he raised his eyebrow and came to me.
“Hmm? I’m sorry.
A very tall man, very cleverly put me by the door.
“I had something to tell you. I’m sorry.
I coughed.
“But now it’s up to you. I’m sorry.
“Good, good, good, good. He touched my head and asked me what else to bring.
There’s another reason Razonsu went out, which is that he’ll help me pack.
I have to admit that.
He’s always better organized than I’ve been.
13
Because it’s a unit-organized activity, there are many families.
And the one with the kids, the one next to my job just went to kindergarten with a little fish hat and looked so cute.
“You used to like kids so much? I’m sorry.
I’m having fun with my snacks, and Song-Shin is behind me.
“I always liked it. What about you? Do you like children?”
I looked back at him.
“I like it. Especially…”
He came near me in my ear.
“If we had kids. I’m sorry.
“…”
It’s not too long to go to Jing County, waiting for the bus, and I feel a bit hot though it’s sunproof.
As soon as he covered the sun with his hand, Song Shu opened his umbrella to my head.
He’s got the eyes of a star looking at me like I know my wife best.
I was just about to hurt him, and a cab stopped in front of us.
It’s a real stop. The kind the driver almost drifted.
A woman ran off and got out of the car and came up and grabbed Song-Shu’s arm.
“What are you doing, who are you?”
We’ve got a lot of people here. Look at all the noise.
“Song Si, you come with me. I’m sorry.
I don’t know the girl who pulled his arm, but it’s obvious that he knew Song Shu’s face.
Women are anxious on their faces, but Song-Sun is still standing there.
“Jossin jumped! I’m sorry.
My temple jumped.
That’s a bad name.
“Now saved, but in need of an emergency blood transfusion, Son-soo, you know she’s rh negative blood, and the blood bank can’t be transferred. I’m sorry.
“You’re the only one who can save her now, Song Si! I’m sorry.
Song Shui’s blood type is also a rare panda blood type called rh negative blood, which I know.
Jossin jumped, why did she jump because of Song Shu?
Son-soo stood there in silence and no woman could pull.
The woman looked at me and fell on her knees.
“You’re Song Shu’s wife, right? You, hello. I’m Josshin’s sister. I know there’s a lot wrong with Si Xing in our family.
“I beg you, I beg you, don’t you remember the little man. Let Song-Suk give us a blood transfusion. This is saving people.”
Women have been begging me on the ground, looking at us more and more.
I feel like I’m in my head, and she’s crying all the time, and it’s what she’s doing today.
It’s been a long time since I heard Song Shu.
“I’ll go with you.”
It’s low, it’s light.
But there is no doubt.
Women stood up in front of me and laughed before their tears were cleaned.
Sung-soo went down and into the car until he closed it.
I watched the taxi grow.
And I suddenly remembered that I was hiding behind my heart and didn’t tell Song-Shu.
I’m pregnant.
And he doesn’t know.
Later, he never had a chance to know.
14
The bus went all the way to the mountains, and I looked out the window.
“Do you want a cheese bar? I’m sorry.
Sister Wang touched my shoulder and Song Shu and the taxi left me alone on this journey.
Sister Wang, when she looks at me, let her husband sit with the children and sit with me.
“My little baby likes it. Taste it? I’m sorry.
Jell-O cheese stick to my mouth, bright under the light.
“Thank you, Sister Wang.”
I smiled at her.
A lot of people saw the scene where Song Shu left me, and I know that Wang is understanding me.
“How old is your baby? I’m sorry.
“Six years old, next year’s primary school. I’m sorry.
Speaking of the children’s sister-in-law, she’s become so glamorous that I don’t listen to the children’s fun.
I consciously touched my stomach.
I’m with Son-Suk, kid.
It’s amazing. It’s a seed in my belly.
The mountain water is particularly beautiful in Yangzhou, as it has not been overexploited and has retained a great deal of its popularity.
Our trip is to stay here for one night, where we live in the middle of the mountains, where the owner takes out a few scattered chickens and the children play in loud and loud while they eat.
This afternoon I had a good time, and suddenly I got here.
Sister, where’s Big Brother?
It took me half a day to find out he was talking about Song Shu.
I know. He’s a kid. He knows nothing.
It’s still empty.
“Big brother doesn’t want a sister. I’m sorry.
“Why doesn’t he have a sister? I’m sorry.
Little Jing is looking at me.
“Because Big Brother wants to save someone important to him. I’m sorry.
“Isn’t the older brother the important person? I’m sorry.
“…”
I can’t say a word.
“Sister, have some sugar!”
But Xiao Zheng soon forgot to share his candy with me.
“No, I don’t want to eat snacks like you. I’m sorry.
His mom picked him up from behind and laughed and said I was sorry.
I shake my head and say nothing.
There were several families on this trip, and I guess I’m so single. I’m pretty sensitive to everyone.
The phone was shocked. It was SONG-Soo who texted me.
Counting time, he’s given his blood, and I wonder if he got his first love back.
He called me and I just hung up.
The text message was plain, telling me where he kept my laundry.
And the mountains are full of moons, and the shadows of the trees are on the ground,
The dog at the home was barking twice, and the evening was so late that he didn’t know where to start.
15
We were all very tired and went back to our rooms after dinner, and I was looking at empty rooms.
Close the door and lie down on the bed.
I touched my stomach again.
It’s amazing. There’s a life in there. Am I not alone now?
I gave this little guy a name in my head.
If it’s Song, what’s his name?
Song Star? There’s a lot of stars tonight, but it’s too easy. I have to go back and check the dictionary.
Pick him a name and I fell asleep.
And when I woke up, it was a crazy knock.
“Mun, are you there? Get up! Earthquake! I’m sorry.
I listened to the voice of the outsider and my head couldn’t handle what happened.
But the bed is shaking, and it’s shaking.
The roof is like it’s going to collapse at any time until the shivering dust spills over my face.
I woke up and pulled my legs and ran out of the door.
There was a constant cry out of the window as though it were a vision of the end of the day which had never been seen, and the mountains were cut down straight down, spilling a thousand layers of mud soup.
The family is out there, and many of them are running out, and the children cry out loud and out loud.
I barely swayed and stood firm, and the ground gradually broke a gap.
“Mun, come here.”
Wang is still trying to hand me her hand, and a big stone is falling in front of us.
“Look out! I’m sorry.
Her husband killed her in her care, which was the last thing I saw.
She’s protected. That’s nice.
I fell down the floor at great speed, and suddenly I felt a deep pain at the bottom.
It turns out he just ran too fast and stepped on a screw.
The sense of weightlessness, the shaving of the skin by a blunt object and the sudden fall of the bones are about to break.
I suddenly found no one around.
I’m at the bottom of the floor, and there’s something falling down, a big rock crushing my leg, and I can’t pull it out.
It’s so loud that I’m crying so little.
I collapsed.
“Who’s there? I’m sorry.
“Who will save me, who will save me…”
It’s dark, there’s nothing, there’s nothing to see, even the moonlight is covered. I don’t know if it’s dark or if I can’t see it.
I’m trying to pull my leg out. I can’t.
“It hurts, it hurts. I’m sorry.
“Who will save me, Father, Mother…”
“Song Si…”
Really, it hurts.
The abdominal pain was not apparent.
Until I felt something was coming out, and the brain realized it.
Strangely, what I thought at that time was that I finally didn’t have to think about telling Song-Shu that we had children.
“Song Suk. I’m sorry.
In the sound of stones, I muffled his name.
Would you be happy to have saved your first love?
But our children seem to be dying.
16
I had a dream.
It was raining so hard, Song Shu came to me like crazy, so the big man kneeled beside me and kept calling my name.
But I’m a little tired and I don’t want him.
I heard the doctor tell him you didn’t know your wife was pregnant.
But now that it’s gone, there’s no way. It’s a miracle to get her back.
Mom and Dad, friends and colleagues are all around me. Let me wake up.
But I’m so tired, so tired.
Hungry, painful. I’ve seen the light of life before me, and I remember the day I first met Song Shu.
He’s an easy guy to make people like him.
But, Song Shui, I’m not being too casual.
I couldn’t stop myself from thinking when I saw Wang’s husband protecting her.
You told me you’d save me first.
You liar.
I don’t know.
The ticking sound of the instrument.
Every part of my body hurts like a drill, and I blinked in my own eyes, and the ceiling in the hospital was always so pale.
“Winds, Yuns, you’re awake. OK, I’ll get a doctor! I’m sorry.
The chair was soared by people standing up and being pushed away that I looked back and the room was empty.
Mom, it’s just as acute as ever.
The doctor in the white coat came in haste and asked me a lot of questions about his condition, and I swerved my neck and I saw my mother standing in the corner of the wall and rubbing tears.
Let me cry too.
“Well, it’s a good thing we won’t be seeing each other again soon.
Dad’s playing round in the back. He’s not very skilled.
“Windun, this time you’ve escaped from the dead.
“You know, I’ve been looking for Buddha for days. God bless you, you’re okay…”
“Well, it’s no big deal. You’re fine. I’m sorry.
“Mom made you a meatloaf, and the doctor said I had to eat the soft ones first. Come on, Ma. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
After that, a lot of people came to see me.
Most of them were friends and relatives, and they held me in their arms from the first time I was a kid and almost crushed my ribs.
“A cloud, I miss you so much. I’m sorry.
I rubbed my hand off her cheek tears.
“We all know what Song Shu did, and your mother asks why he didn’t go to Yang County with you, who knows he went to give blood to his ex. I’m sorry.
“Well, in my eyes, it’s good to lose the ex-girlfriend. I’m sorry.
“…”
“Song Shu’s bad man is out of our way, and we won’t let him see you without your permission. Clouds, you’ll be sick for days. I’m sorry.
“Don’t get mad at that dog man. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
I don’t really want to see him.
At least not now. I’m afraid I’ll feel the worst when I see him.
I’ve been sleeping for days and I can’t sleep at night.
I lay on my bed, and my hands were laid unconsciously on my stomach.
There’s a big mouth there, and my mom makes it simple, but I know myself that it’s hard for me to have another kid with this big wound.
If you count well today, you’ll have to have dozens of scars.
It sucks.
I knew I was not going to Jing County, I had a bad time, and I got into this mess.
I don’t know.
Just as I was bored and emptied, the door of the ward was softly pushed.
I thought no one was coming.
But I can’t be more familiar with his footsteps.
Someone comes to my bed and skilledly helps me to get the blankets kicked out.
The air conditioner sounded a few times, and it probably turned the temperature up.
I couldn’t help it until he pulled me the first half of the blanket.
…Song-Suk stood by my bed.
Twist.
“No sleep?”
When did he get so dumb?
And We looked with him in the night in peace, and in the end he fell down and called out my name.
Clouds, I…
In the dark, he opened his mouth, but he was so quiet, he wrapped us up.
“Song Si, it’s not your fault. I’m sorry.
I never thought my voice would be so smooth. I’ve thought about it for a long time. I’m selfish.
“What’s wrong with you?” You’re just going to save people. You’re going to save whoever that guy is, aren’t you? I’m sorry.
“You do not have the power of a prophet. How do you know that this will happen?” I’m sorry.
“I know, I know, Song Shu, why should I blame you…”
I know that my soul is torn apart by two people, bitter and hateful, merciful and kind, while irritating me and crushing me.
I tried so hard to pretend to be free until he hugged me.
He’s got a light smell of tobacco. He never smokes, I think.
“A cloud, man would hate himself. I’m sorry.
“I dreamt of going back and punching myself once, you know, dreaming. I’m sorry.
“I should have known you were pregnant. You gave me so many hints. I’m sorry.
“It’s me, it’s me. I’ll ask you sooner. I’ll never let you go there alone if I know you’re pregnant.”
I found him shaking.
There’s something wet on the suit. This guy, would he cry?
His breath was heavy and he wanted to hold me tight, but he was afraid to touch me.
I’m staring at that ray of light on the ground, and I’m slowly feeling some sort of unstoppable sadness.
“Let’s get a divorce, Song Si. I’m sorry.
Feel his breath and stop for a moment.
“Song Si, actually, today, Josshin came to see me. I’m sorry.
“What a coincidence. I was at the first hospital with her. She broke her leg, but kept coming. I’m sorry.
“You know what she told me? I’m sorry.
She said, “Thank you. I’m sorry.
“Thank you for bringing our child’s life to her new life. I’m sorry.
“She said she felt her life had been borrowed from our children. I’m sorry.
I hate to tighten the sheets.
“Don’t listen to her. She’s gone mad. She’s…”
“Yes, she is mad,” and We overtook the collar of those before us.
He lets me drag, and We see clearly in his eyes his face, and despairing,
“But I’m crazy too, you’re right. Everyone’s right. The earthquake took our kids away. But what about me? What about my children? Who will save me? Who will pity me? I’m sorry.
In the dark, he saw what was in my eyes, tender, condoning, guilty, depressed.
But I don’t want him to look at me like that.
“I’m sick of thinking about what you’ve done with her. I’m sorry.
“It’s instinctive, I don’t blame you, but I still hate you. I’m sorry.
“You listen to me, Song Si, I hate you. I’m sorry.
My head ends up in his chest, and my voice gets lower and lower.
That’s it.
More than that.
17
Song Shu agreed to divorce.
I know that he will agree, and that he will always indulge me, and no matter what I ask, he will not fail me in the end.
The day we signed up for the wedding, the weather was bad.
Today too, the clouds are cloudy.
After that, he asked me how to get home.
I said take a cab.
“Give you a ride. I’m sorry.
“No, no way, Mr. Song. I’m sorry.
“…”
“Mr. Song. I’m sorry.
He smiled and murmured my words.
“You never called me Mr. Song. I’m sorry.
“…”
What did you say to her that day?
I don’t know if I can’t remember or if I forgot.
The word “goodbye” in Chinese means to meet again.
So I didn’t say anything that day.
I said goodbye.
18
I went to Yunnan Dali on my annual vacation.
It’s really nice there, 300 bucks a three-night electric hotel, 19 peaks of Kurayama from the window.
At the music bar that opened in the evening, the flower-sellers smiled at me with a big refraction of roses.
I’ll buy one. I’ll get it back to the hotel and take a picture and send a circle of friends.
“Oh yes, sister, this is for you.”
The little girl turned over her bag and she had several jobs.
“This letter has been sent so much, it’s finally on your way today. I’m sorry.
“This is fate. Good luck today! I’m sorry.
“…”
I went back to the hotel and slowly spread the letter.
Song-Suk’s handwriting.
Like a dog.
So I can recognize it at once, I know his university science, and I’ve never asked for it.
Good thing he’s slow, I read, and I can read a general.
I don’t know.
“Mun, this is my thirty-first letter to you. I’m sorry.
“I’ve tore it all up. It’s so ugly and it’s always unsatisfactory. I’m sorry.
“Don’t forget it. This is what I did after a post.” I’m sorry.
“I’ve recently had a bad habit of smoking, but I’ve had a lot of smoking because I’m not allowed to do anything. I’m sorry.
“But don’t worry, I didn’t smoke it before I wrote to you, and I won’t make it smell. I’m sorry.
“I used to think that there was nothing to say that I regretted and regretted until I met. I’m sorry.
“I’m dreaming every night. It would have been better if I had been with you that day. I’m sorry.
“I can protect you and our children, I…”
“Sorry, you probably hate it when I say so much. I’m sorry.
“You don’t like to kneel down and beg for your man, I know. I’m sorry.
“You don’t like it, I know. I’m sorry.
“I can’t give you anything anymore, you say you hate me, what can I do, I just accept. I’m sorry.
“Even hate can keep me in your heart for a while. I’m sorry.
“I often didn’t understand how things got like this. I’m sorry.
“And then I thought about it. I’m sorry.
“There’s always regret, there’s always regret, there’s always coincidence. I’m sorry.
“The last time I went to drink with a friend, drank my head, hit my head on glass. I’m sorry.
“Friends say I keep calling your name and asking why. I’m sorry.
“Well, maybe I haven’t. I’m sorry.
“I miss you a little bit. I think I miss the toothbrush cup you put next to me. I bought another one there. I’m sorry.
“When you moved, you forgot the flowers you planted. I’m sorry.
“It took me a while to manage it, and now it’s barely alive. I’m sorry.
“I think it’s funny that I can’t leave you, but I wrote this letter. I’m sorry.
“Man, sometimes things are contradictory. I’m sorry.
“So, let’s be patient. I think you’re going crazy. I’m sorry.
“Ask from friends, you’ve changed jobs in many places, like avoiding me. I’m sorry.
“Forget it. Just be happy. I haven’t changed my job, I’ve recently been promoted, the puff shop in front of my house fell down, and I can’t say anything until you come back and buy yourself something to eat. I’m sorry.
“You’ve written a lot, you’ve got to bore me, and you’ve been doing it before. I’m sorry.
I still want to tell you that I love you. I’m sorry.
“One thing is, whenever you’re in my life, I’m gonna love you. I’m sorry.
“You hate me, out of instinct. I’m sorry.
“But I love you too. I’m sorry.
(complete) filing number: YX11nR8w75O
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
