In the summer of 2016, I went to a small hill village church.
Later, when the police found me, I was locked in a pig ring at the village chief ‘ s house. I have to take a few grains of food from the boars to survive.
It was a rainy day. I am covered in mud, and my soul is in discomfort, and I hear only a moment of noise.
During the wet night, a police officer took me from the hill and carried me to the ambulance.
Later, I was admitted to a simple hospital.
There’s no air conditioner, just fan squeaks and squeaks.
I’ve been lying in bed for days and sometimes doctors come to me asking me some psychological questions.
Until the officer who was behind me got into the ward.
His last name is Leung.
Officer Liang said he needed to know the history of my presence in the pigsty.
I heard it. I couldn’t help but tighten the sheets.
My life has been ruined. I have no idea how to get back to my original life. Even I feel like a pig!
I said you know what? I’ve been thinking about how to die these days.
But the tone of Officer Leung is still calm.
He said no. You’re just a victim.
“If you’re hurt, say it, it’s no shame. I’m sorry.
“It is the concealment of the truth that condones the perpetrators. I’m sorry.
“Hey, you’re a teacher. He said, “If a student is bullied, you must want the student to say it. I’m sorry.
I’m freezing. His eyes, tenacious and sincere, are sanctified by unknown forces.
I finally got to the bed and wept, and I gradually gave up the complaints.
And We cried, and said, “I swear, I will never be taught again. I’m sorry.
“I’m listening. I’m sorry.
One.
My name is Qin. I regretted coming to the village for weeks.
At first, the mountain air was fresh and the students were enthusiastic.
I’ll always pick up some flowers and tea.
Despite difficult conditions and the presence of spiders in the house, there was a great deal of room.
Until one day, after school, I’d like to go to the village’s commissary and buy some handy noodles.
Walking to the edge of the field, he saw a young man with long, long hair with smoke on his hands, holding a girl’s arms.
The girl was wearing high school pants.
And I could not bear to say, “What are you doing?” Let go!
“You are the new Qin teacher.” So pretty. I’m sorry.
I didn’t like his tone and asked him who he was and what he was doing.
“You’re mistaken, Mr. Qin. It’s getting dark. I want to go with her. I’m sorry.
Young people speak softly, while girls look away. I couldn’t help but look at him.
“Hey, my name is Zhao Dongjiu, and my dad is the village chief here. Young people laugh a little bit of yellow teeth, “Don’t worry. I’m sorry.
I don’t want to go any further.
As a result, Zhao Dongjii shot me in the back.
Turning back, his face was close.
“Mrs. Ko Qin, don’t you want a man with you? I’m sorry.
“The mountains are unsafe and so lonely. I’m sorry.
After all, Zhao winter rock stung my sea.
And I was terrified, and I turned back a few steps, and said, “I can take care of myself.” I’m sorry.
Zhao Winter Rock is still in place.
But I caught him in the eye of a flash.
“Sir, be careful…”
Twilight is coming.
The girl was holding my hand, pushing.
And my life in peace began at that moment.
Two.
I teach the language of primary school.
After that day, it was unknown why there was no order in the classroom.
The students are distracted.
There’s always a few students in the book who look at me writing paintings.
A few days later, I couldn’t take it anymore.
At first glance, although the line is simple, it is clearly the nakedness of a woman.
For a moment, I thought unconsciously, it was me they were painting.
I came out angry and angry at the podium.
I said if you don’t study hard, you’ll never get out of this mountain!
Unlike in the past, the students didn’t look at me at all.
The boys at the top laughed, stepped on the floor and looked at me in a provocative manner, and were in a standoff.
I strangled, and my back dipped in cold sweat.
I realized I was in the mountains.
They’re children, but they’re staring at me, and they’re staring at a prey.
Somehow, I think of the spiders wandering around the house. And this village is a big net.
3
That night, I thought for a long time, and I decided to go to the students’ house for a home visit.
However, most children are left behind.
I went to the village and the old people didn’t care about the students. Even the parents who stayed in the village mocked me.
They say I can’t last long.
That day, I walked in the village in ash.
The old man on the side of the road, scrambling me, talking in a dialect that he can’t understand.
It’s not a good word.
I never understood what went wrong.
Or am I thinking too much?
But what happened next really cooled my back.
The next morning.
I’m from the podium, looking for the silent work that was collected.
Turning to the middle of the page, he beats all over him.
A plaid paper, no homework.
Only, it’s full of two big words.
“Slut.”
4
Paper, no name.
Look up, all the students are reading.
Of course I’m scared. I can’t even ask who wrote it.
But how can I not believe that a child can do something like this?
So after class, I got a good student.
Her name is Zhou Xiao Wing, in sixth grade this year.
Her sister, Zhou Moo, was the girl who was stopped by Zhao Dongjii that day and studied in the county for high school.
I asked Zhou Xiao Wing and said I knew that the students were against me.
At first, she gave us back.
Hands on the horns, clearly nervous.
But soon, she nodded.
Zhao Winter Rock. I’m sorry.
She was afraid to say, “Jo said you were in town doing that kind of work…”
“What kind of work? I’m sorry.
“Sale…seller. I’m sorry.
5
Suddenly, I realized why the students had changed their attitude and why the villagers were pointing at me.
I was knocked out of my head by anger and I ran to the entrance to the classroom and shouted at the students.
Why do you miss me so much? I’m your teacher!
I said he’s a gangster!
After the silence, a childish voice rebukes me with anger.
“You’re here to lie to us! You don’t deserve to be a teacher!”
I didn’t even know what grade he was in.
Because the rest of my voice has drowned me.
“You’re a bad woman in town! Crazy woman!”
“You’re here to hide, right? You’re not clean! You’re afraid the police will take you!”
“You’ll only be here for a few weeks! I’m sorry.
“You seduced someone else’s father! I’m sorry.
In the middle of a fight, I look dark and hold the door frame.
But then I saw the crowd split up, and Zhao came to school and came to me.
Behind him were a few strong men.
I’m a little freaked out, and I’m running late.
Zhao Dongjii told me to walk out of school.
He said, ‘Do not be afraid of your brothers and sisters. The woman is ill. I’m sorry.
And I’ve been surrounded by a few strong men with no room for flight.
When you struggle, you get punched all over you.
When he cried, he was punched in the mouth.
I remember it was a hot afternoon.
The simple teaching upstairs only echoes my cries and no one stands up to help me.
I was dragged out of school without even seeing the headmaster.
This is the beginning of my nightmare.
Six.
I was dragged all the way to the village chief’s house.
Not far, a few hundred meters.
Just remember I had pains all over my body, lost my shoes, and my feet were full of wounds.
I came back when Zhao winter rock threw me in bed.
He told some men to go out and laugh at me.
He said, “Student me, Mr. Qin.” I’m sorry.
I was completely frightened and cried out to him, begging him to let me go.
But Zhao Dongjiwa said, “Are you crazy?” I’m sorry.
“I say you’re crazy to keep you from going out and hurting someone else?” I’m sorry.
In that moment, I had a heart attack.
Look around, find out if there are any sharp instruments to defend yourself.
Thinking, even with him?
However, Zhao winter rock has come up.
And We struggled with only strength, and struck him, but he mocked him.
“Sensei, how can you punish a student? I’m sorry.
With his sweaty ups and downs, I can only hope for a speedy end.
And then, when I thought it was over, the door opened again.
A thin, able old man, came in.
He’s the village chief, the father of Zhao Dongjiu, Zhao Feng.
Zhao Feng closed the door, looked at my body and complained.
“Son, didn’t you promise to wait for me? I’m sorry.
7
I haven’t been out of my house since that day.
They locked me in a pig’s collar, and didn’t give me any clothes to wear, and they put in my mouth, modified, donkey’s mouth, and only let me eat pig’s groin.
At first, I dared to cry out for help while I was eating.
But every time, they are beaten to death.
So I finally learned.
I won’t fight, I won’t ask for help. I started to strangle in the corner of the pigs’ rings and learn to live with them.
Then they became cattle in their mouths, pigs, and when they played, they called out to me, “Teachers of the People.”
That day, it was like it had been carved into my bones.
Even when I’m rescued, every night I dream about those images.
8
And remembering the second half, I’ve already finished breathing.
Officer Leung, who remembers to be very serious, handed me some tissues and asked, “Can you be sure you remember correctly?” I’m sorry.
I stopped and looked seriously at Officer Liang. The feeling of being offended, the oil was born.
I grabbed the bed and I said, “How could I be wrong?” What’s wrong with me? I’m sorry.
For a while, I remember: just now, the nurse was just outside the door. She was stopped by Officer Liang when she saw me breathing.
I was cold in my heart, close to my bed, and I said, “Are you from Zhao Winter Rock?” You’re gonna turn him over! No, you’re sending me back! I’m sorry.
Officer Liang seems to have been scared and stepped back.
And he turned his hands, and said: Fear not! Zhao winter rock is dead. I’m sorry.
9
“What? I’m sorry.
This time, I was scared.
“That day, the fire, Zhao and his father died in the house and found you in the fire. I’m sorry.
I asked, “So what?” I’m sorry.
“They both had knife wounds. I’m sorry.
Officer Leung was staring at me and seriously said, “It’s a very bad way to cover up a knife with a fire. I’m sorry.
I couldn’t help but be silent, for a long time, and I looked up and said, “So what?” I’m sorry.
Officer Liang asked again. “Are you sure you remember correctly? I’m sorry.
I didn’t! I didn’t see anything! I’m sorry.
I have some anger in my tone.
However, Officer Liang took a photograph.
Photos of me laughing and sleeping naked with Zhao Winter Rock.
10
I’m holding a picture and my hands are shaking.
“Think again, Mr. Qin. I’m sorry.
Officer Leung is a little more gentle than that.
He came a little closer, and the tone was patiently guided, “You seem to have a relationship with the dead in the picture. I’m sorry.
And the contents of that picture are tearing apart a scene in my head.
It was like a dream.
A long time later, I finally dropped the picture and said:
“That day I saw it. How did they die…”
“Let’s start from the beginning, from your relationship with Zhao. I’m sorry.
“I’m not lying. I’m sorry.
“Hmm? I’m sorry.
Zhao Winter Rock did rape me. I’m sorry.
“Go on. I’m sorry.
Eleven.
And We make the mountains of tea, and do not pick them.
It’s from Zhao.
That’s how he started to talk to me.
He said that they were not like the people of the city. And the most practical.
I admit that it is true that Zhao Dongjiu has come to the village in disguise.
I’m still in school, counting the summer break, and I’m dealing with the pursuit of Zhao Winterstone.
I was starting to think that Zhao winter rock was fine.
He’s handsome and he’s very rich.
By his father’s operation, he bought four houses in the county.
Maybe it’s real. I can take him to the big city.
Until something happened that made me realize that everything Zhao Dongjiu did was just lying to me.
I’m just a stupid fish that’s a little new in the net that Zhao winter rocks.
As for the other fish I found, Zhou Xiao Wing’s sister, Zhou Moot.
12
Zhou Moo and Zhou Xiaoling are my students.
At that time, Zhou Moo Tung completed his exams and went back to the village to do compulsory tutoring.
Leave me alone and ask me about the big city.
So, Zhou Moo-ho is the oldest student in this village.
I taught her how to survive in the luxurious big cities.
Maybe I taught too much.
There’s so much money in big cities. Without money, it’s hard to live.
So that Zhou’s eyes were returned to this little village.
There’s a man in the village who can make Zhou moist and don’t worry about living.
I saw it that day.
Under the stars, by the field. Zhao winter lwa, with Zhou’s glowing hand, is about to walk.
They didn’t argue, and I didn’t stop.
13
I was thinking, yeah, Zhou Moo-ho was 18.
She’s young and pretty and loving, and that’s the environment she knows best.
So that night, I shared cards with Zhao.
I said don’t contact me anymore. I’m going back to the city. I can’t stay here forever.
But Zhao Dongjiu, got mad.
Did he say you could go back? I spent so much time on you that you didn’t get anything and you tried to dump me?
That was the first time I heard him swear.
Maybe two or three words. I want to stop.
Zhao winter rock grabbed me and threw me to bed.
14
Actually…
I should have called the police.
15
This time, Officer Liang is concerned about my feelings.
He stopped the pen and asked, “Why didn’t he call the police?” I’m sorry.
“I… I refused him compensation.” I’m sorry.
I laughed at myself and said, “400,000. He said give me 400,000. Don’t call the police. He said he didn’t mean it. I’m sorry.
“Who will believe? Or do I really need it? After all, I’ve chosen to teach. I said, “But then, I should have pretended to agree to take the $400,000 and then went to the police. I’m sorry.
16
On that day, I rejected Zhao’s plea.
I say 400,000 is far from enough. That’s not what I want.
I said I had to put you in jail.
As a result, when I broke out of Zhao’s arm with anger, I opened the door and hit Zhao’s chest.
He’s been waiting outside the door for a long time and he’s pushing me back inside.
At this moment, I’ve got a laughter from Zhao Winterstone, “Well, what about 800,000? I’m sorry.
“But this time, Mr. Qin, it was with my father. I’m sorry.
We turned back, and Zhao winter rock sat on the bed, and the old God was wringing his wrist.
“Just now, I took a picture of you, from which point of view you don’t look like a rebel. I’m sorry.
“It won’t be long before your rumors are heard from the school. I’m sorry.
“In rumours you may have done that kind of work. Let’s see, maybe there’s something wrong with your head. To keep you from endangering your students, I can only take you from school. I’m sorry.
“Well, take it from the classroom, or take it from the dormitory? But does it matter if anyone else sees it? I’m sorry.
When Zhao Dongjii finished talking, he put his cell phone in front of me and my heart stopped beating.
That angle, really rough. It’s like I volunteered for it.
I was so angry that I stretched out my hand to grab it, but I fell empty and heard nothing but the cold and cold sound of Zhao winter rock.
“400,000, 800,000? Do you really deserve it?”
“You only deserve to be an animal, understand? My family, an animal.”
17
That day, I ran out like crazy.
Then they fell down.
Covering his mouth, he stomped at the pigs’ bar, and he was invaded again and again.
In the end, I was all out of strength, like a pile of mud, and they put me in the house and locked me up in Zhao Feng’s house.
The house, the yard, or the pigs’ ring.
I began to miss cities, apartments and even that poor staff dormitories, even with spiders living with me, thousands of times better than now.
But the reality is cruel, and the next day, occasionally Zhao Feng and occasionally Zhao Dongjiang.
Until after a midday, when Zhao’s Fung brought me back to the pigs’ table,
Zhao winter rock walked into the yard with Zhou Moo.
18
I’ve been desperate for a long time.
But Zhou fluffles up, rekindling my hope.
Even though I’ve been knocked out a million times before because I called out for help.
But this time, I know, this is probably my only chance.
So I shouted out, “Chou Moot, help me! Help…”
The next second, Zhao Feng’s slaps were thrown to the ground.
In the sight, the shivering Zhou fuzzy, stepped on her blue shoes and walked towards me.
I looked up and saw that Zhou was pushed by Zhao Winterstone.
I saw Zhao Dongjik didn’t know what to say in his ear.
Then, Zhou fluffled and shivered and calmed down.
The more calm she is, the more desperate I am.
Finally, Zhou fluffles down.
“Sorry, Mr. Qin. I’m sorry.
“I want to spend my life with winter rock. I’m sorry.
“You think about it, be my… mother-in-law. I’m sorry.
19
For a second, I seem to have lost all my senses.
There’s only anger in the chest.
That’s the last bit of strength in me.
I reached out with my hand and grabbed Zhou Moo’s leg in the laughter of Zhao Winterstone and Zhao Feng.
I got up with Zhou’s moaning.
Zhao Winter Rock is standing by for a few seconds.
I think I know why he was stuck: I didn’t run out of the yard, but I ran inside.
He should regret it.
In the house, it’s the kitchen. I remember there was a kitchen knife.
I didn’t do what he wanted, and I took the knife and ran out and ran into Zhao Feng to stop me.
One knife, to the position of the heart.
Zhao Feng immediately covered his heart and kneeled in front of me.
Behind him, the same Zhao Winterstone, stopped again.
It was too late for Zhao to turn around and try to run. I had already watched his waist and cut a knife.
By the time Zhao winter rock was on the ground, my second knife fell in his throat.
In the mountains, the wind blows, and the drizzle flows.
I feel free at last.
I’m walking down Zhou Moo.
She’s already scared. She’s full of fear. She’s pulling back.
But I’m too tired, and I’m too weak.
That knife just cut her in the face.
When Zhou fluffles on the ground, my sense comes back a little.
She fell in a pig’s ring, covered in mud, crying and grunting.
That sense of reason, that support me, that no more killing.
I said, “Go away. I’m sorry.
Zhou fluffles, climbs up, kneels and slams at me.
I was wrong to say that I was wrong.
And there’s only one thought left in my head.
Yeah, I’m a teacher.
I taught her sister. I taught her.
Zhou Xiao Wing may be with me when I’m being lied.
When I was insulted, Zhou Moot decided to become an accomplice.
I really don’t fit to be a teacher.
“Chou Moo, one last thing for me. I’m sorry.
“Please don’t call the police. I’m sorry.
Zhou Moo, little chick pecks his head like rice.
After she left, I went into the kitchen, lit the house with burning firewood.
Then, go back to the pigsty.
If it goes well, I guess.
He will be a rescued, innocent victim.
20
“That’s it, Officer Leung. I’m sorry.
My tone has become calmer.
“So finally, she called the police, right? I’m sorry.
“This teacher, all he did was fail. I’m sorry.
As a result, Officer Liang laughed.
“I thought you’d never remember before. I’m sorry.
He groaned and said, “I didn’t think you had the energy to create a plan for your own exoneration. I’m sorry.
I was wrinkled and watched him say, “What do you mean?” I’m sorry.
It’s been a while since Officer Liang finally got his word.
“Mr. Qin, you’ve been very upset, and maybe there’s something wrong with the perception of time. I’m sorry.
I couldn’t help but stop him and say, “What more do you want me to think?” I killed someone, I remember! I went to fucking jail! Okay? I’m sorry.
I tried to keep myself from crying, but I couldn’t cover my throat.
We said, “Why should I go to prison? Do you think I want to kill someone? I’m the victim! I’m sorry.
As a result, Officer Liang still lamented.
His tone became particularly serious.
“Think about it, are you really the victim? I’m sorry.
“Have you ever been humiliated by students? I’m sorry.
“Have you ever been in a pigsty? I’m sorry.
“Sir, listen to me.”
“You’re a good teacher. The students have never humiliated you, and you’ve never been in a pigsty. I’m sorry.
“You’re in class every day. I’m sorry.
“Even when you were in the pigsty, you were in class. I’m sorry.
“Many witnesses can prove it. I’m sorry.
21
Officer Liang’s words were like a bomb that blew up in my head.
Head, it hurts more.
I’m talking about a picture that travels through my head and collapses.
I’m talking to myself, saying it’s impossible. I said I’d remember correctly. I said they were hurting me!
Zhao Dongjii, Zhao Feng, the villagers who point the finger, and the Zhou Moo Moo, who’s only a peach blossom!
Officer Liang, however, made a long cry and made a call.
He said: “Come in.” I’m sorry.
I’m still wondering, outside the ward, Zhou Moo has come in.
She’s wearing simple, pale, and timid.
Officer Leung said: “The night of the incident, she was at a party with her classmates and did not appear at Zhao’s home. I’m sorry.
I was trying to counter it, but I realized something was wrong.
We looked at Zhou’s little childish face and looked at it, and suddenly the heartbeat slipped away.
Her face, exceptionally smooth.
At that time, Officer Liang again picked up his cell phone, opened the camera and turned towards me.
The camera, my face, has several scars that have not yet healed.
Those images continue to collapse and to be regrouped.
A lot of strange and familiar memories are emerging.
I covered my head, I was in terrible pain, and I cried.
Long time, I looked up and Zhou Moo had left.
“Your eyes have finally become more normal. Officer Liang was staring at me and making a sound of relief.
He’s even a little scared.
“You know what? Your eyes were not right, the pupils were scattered. I’m sorry.
I came back to understand why Officer Liang was scared back when he was mad.
Turns out he’s real, scared of me.
“Do you remember? Officer Liang asks:
“I remember. I’m sorry.
I whispered, looked out the window. Suddenly, the fence outside the window was so obvious.
This is the first floor, why put a few fences outside the window?
In keeping with the growing memory, I swallowed my mouth, looked at Officer Leung and said my assumptions carefully: “Is this really a hospital?” I’m sorry.
Indeed, Officer Liang shook his head and said, “You are already in the city’s mental hospital.” I’m sorry.
I held my hand up like a deer and pointed to my head.
“Yes. Officer Liang said, “Your brain seems to have a problem. I’m sorry.
“Yes. I put my head in my knee, and I murmured, “I remember. I’m sorry.
22
Something’s wrong with your head. It’s what happens in the village.
The longer you wait, the more you feel insecure.
It was not clear whether it was because of the closure of the desolate environment or because of the news of accidents during the period of the church. It’s not safe. It’s like everyone’s trying to hurt me.
I’ll see the sketches on the student books, the humiliating vocabulary. But after a while, it disappears.
I noticed the villagers pointing at me. But when they get close, they’ll change their smile.
The spiders in the house, very rarely connected, are like “new roommates” who are deliberately thrown in.
I’m so scared.
I think someone broke into my office and stole the students’ homework. Those villagers also began to disguise themselves after I was close.
And Zhao Dongjiu was my only hope.
He’s rich and powerful. He’s a famous bully in the village. But with him, no one would dare hurt me.
That’s what I thought.
Just a little, it worries me.
Zhao Dongjii never let me tell anyone about his relationship.
I don’t know why he’s hiding it.
And that is the confusion that gave rise to my inexhaustible and malicious speculation about him.
23
I think it’s malicious.
There’s something I didn’t know about.
It was only recalled that there was a history of rape in the village.
That was a working girl from the county, who called the police after Zhao Dongjii raped her. It’s just that Zhao won 400,000.
It has even been said that Zhao Feng raped a working girl and was taken into custody.
Anyway, when this rumor got into my ear, I was worried, didn’t I? And then, to abandon me?
In that environment, I was so worried about losing Zhao Winterstone.
Even though he promised me many times that he would marry me into their house and be his wife.
Gradually, I began to observe with hostility all the women who might have taken Zhao Winterstone.
Zhou Moo, who has graduated from high school and is helping in primary school.
She’s really, really dangerous.
24
Zhou Xiaoling was my favorite student.
But she’s Zhou Moo’s sister.
Zhou Xiao Wing goes home every time, and if it’s one person, I’ll feel like Zhou Moo Moo is dating Zhao Winter Rock.
She came home with Zhou Moo, and I’d think they were going in the direction of Zhao Dong Iwa.
If we catch her with Zhou Moo and Zhao Winter Rock, even a few metres apart.
I feel like there’s a “three of them.”
I think I must have been filled with resentment by staring at their backs in front of the school.
Until one day, I heard that Zhou was drunk and taken home by Zhao Dongjii.
In the village, there was talk.
And I… I’m almost mad.
25
On that day, it rained. I went to Zhao Dongjiang’s house to confront him.
In the face of my questioning, Zhao winter rock is unbelievable.
He told me I was crazy. He said I’d always imagined it.
But the more I blame him, the more I feel he’s throwing dirty water on me.
I was upset and I took the knife from the stove.
If you don’t give me an answer today, I’ll die in front of you!
And this time, Zhou Moo-ho broke in.
She’s scared. She’s stuck between us.
But I’m even more certain that there must be a couple of them!
I’ve finally had a knife.
One knife, two? A lot of knives?
I completely forgot that the house was full of blood.
When I woke up, I found out there was no Zhou Moo.
On the ground is Zhao Winterstone and his father Zhao Feng.
26
Outside the window, the rain is getting worse.
I don’t know what to do.
In that moment, it was like my soul had been pulled out.
I seem to be looking down at me with a third look, taking off my clothes and covering them with two bodies.
Then I got some dry wood from outside, lit the stove, lit the house with burning wood.
In the end, I was blind, walking step by step towards the pig’s collar.
It’s like, a rocking walker.
The images of persecution, the assumptions of persecution, and the rumors that I heard, in that step, a brain went into my head.
They’re connected, they’re combined, they’re a “truth” in my fantasy.
Like a cocoon to protect itself.
I don’t think I killed people.
It’s just them, to hurt me.
27
With the end of the memories, all the images of coming to Yamamura became particularly clear.
It’s easy and crazy.
I don’t know how to face Officer Liang, but I can only laugh at myself.
We said, “So I killed the one who wanted to protect me. Right? I’m sorry.
I leaned on the bed, and the electric fan was still turning.
Police Officer Liang closed his notes and, after his silence, he hesitated to say, “Well, not exactly. I’m sorry.
I had a spirit and I asked, “What do you mean?” I’m sorry.
“The kind of mountain flower Zhao winter rock gave you, remember. I’m sorry.
“Remember. I’m sorry.
“It’s a gold flower, known as Mandrake. It’s petals, very poisonous. I’m sorry.
28
I stayed in the ward for a long time.
“There were always people in the village who had been poisoned by Mandoro, and these flowers were dying. I’m sorry.
But there are many in the mountains. I’m sorry.
“Little, hallucinating, affecting the mental state, which is considered free drugs by people abroad. I’m sorry.
“The heavy one, you have to go into the ICT to get it back. I’m sorry.
“You’re not dead. I’m sorry.
Officer Leung made a noise.
I speak with my mouth open, and I find my voice so dumb.
“Why did he do it? I’m sorry.
Officer Liang hesitated to move the chair closer to me.
“The Zhao Winterstone rape case is true. I’m sorry.
“and it appears from Zhao’s actions that he was trying to drive you crazy and then left you in the village forever. I’m sorry.
And I was reminded of something, and I said, “So, he made me hide my relationship with him, really to rape me.” I’m sorry.
“It’s not that simple. Officer Leung shakes his head and says, “If you think about it, if you want to rape you, you should let everyone know you’re in good hands. If you did, no one would believe it. I’m sorry.
“So?”
“So… “
Officer Leung ended up speaking out, “so, in the light of his priors, he wanted you to disappear after losing your mind. Tell them not to lock you up or sell you anywhere. I’m sorry.
“That’s why he doesn’t want people to know you’re close. I’m sorry.
I’ve heard that there’s a sense of irony in my heart.
“Yeah?” I said, “That’s a hell of a family. I’m sorry.
Officer Liang said, “The next thing you know, it’s the interrogation. I’m sorry.
I said, “Okay.
“Well, at least, you admit now that no one’s in the pigsty. I’m sorry.
“Yes. I’m sorry.
Zhao Feng, Zhao Dongwai, did not insult you. I’m sorry.
“Yes. I’m sorry.
“You’ve not been so persecuted, but you’ve killed. I’m sorry.
“Yes. I’m sorry.
I can’t even nod my head. I don’t have any objection.
“Well, I’ll put it on record. I’m sorry.
When Officer Liang is finished, get up and leave.
I couldn’t help but stop him.
“So how long will I be sentenced? I’m sorry.
Officer Leung stopped, turned back and scratched his hair.
“Where do you think this is?”
I looked around and wondered, “A psychiatric hospital, I’m sorry.
“Yes. Officer Leung shook his head and said, “When the toxin was detected in your blood, he was treated in the county and sent to the city. Do you remember being questioned by a doctor? I’m sorry.
I rubbed my head, and I remember the doctor asking me those questions.
I thought that was the shrink who was guiding me.
I noded my head and threw my eyes at Officer Liang.
“You will not be sentenced, and you have been diagnosed as suffering from a serious delusional disorder, which is already in the category of mental disorders and is not capable of criminal responsibility. You’re only in a psychiatric hospital. I’m sorry.
“Oh, yeah?” I’m a little demented, and I’m like, “Why not just defend yourself?” I’m sorry.
And Officer Liang laughed, and said, “Wait for the news, Mr. Qin.” I’m sorry.
I’m “um” and I’m back in bed.
29
A week later, the results came out.
I was convicted of mental disorders and placed in a psychiatric hospital for treatment.
The doctor said I’m a good, medical trauma and I’ll recover soon.
I asked Officer Liang to conceal the matter from his parents and pretend that he was still teaching in Yamamura.
About a month after the treatment, I was convicted of improving the situation, using mobile phones in the open zone and communicating with my parents, it became more natural to conceal it.
I heard about Zhao’s father and son.
The Zhao family was so rich because Zhao Feng was greedy of large subsidies for the villagers and had embezzled countless State assets over the years.
Even a few years ago, several villagers were killed in the aid incident at the village residence.
With the collapse of the building, the underground blood debt was reversed.
The villagers heard the origin of the case and all said that it was Zhao Dongjiu who suffered the consequences.
But that doesn’t matter to me anymore.
It’s a letter from some students, and I’m glad.
30
Almost a year later, I was diagnosed as mentally cured and discharged.
Officer Liang picked me up and sent me to the train station in the city.
In the car, police officer Liang stopped talking and finally said so.
“It may be a little offensive, but ..so forget about this year’s experience. I’m sorry.
“After all, the scenes that you fantasize about are horrible, and I’m a cop that sounds like shit. I’m sorry.
“There’s no need to live behind them. I’m sorry.
I was just smiling, looking out the window.
“Well, it’s a fake. Officer Leung said to himself, “If not for that, it’ll be jail and hospital for murder. I’m sorry.
I heard laughing and whispered, “What will the people of the village see, even if the matter had indeed happened to them, and the court had acquitted them?” I’m sorry.
In a moment, Officer Liang was silent.
He said, “Then glad you’re from the outside, so you can walk away.” I’m sorry.
31
Early summer, the square in front of the station, burned hot by the sun.
At first glance, Zhou Moo-wook in the crowd carried some specialty.
I walked over and rubbed Zhou Xiao Wing’s head.
She comes to see me all the time. I don’t see if she’s growing up.
Zhou Moot went to college and looked at me like before.
We said, “Sheriff Leung, this is it.” I’m sorry.
Officer Liang pointed to the station, “Let’s get you in the car. I’m sorry.
I didn’t say no more. Four men went inside the station.
And that is when Zhou Zaiqiang took my hand and said to him, “Sir, when will you return?” I’m sorry.
I laughed and said, “When you go to college, you’ll see me again.” I’m sorry.
Zhou Xiao Wing’s eyeballs turned around and his face turned depressed. I’m sorry.
And she lamented, and she took my sleeve, and said, “Shall I let my sister send you tea every year?” I’m sorry.
In time, the air seemed to condensate.
Officer Liang was standing in place for a long time and was too stiff to twist his head.
His eyes, staring dead at Zhou Moo.
Zhou’s fluffling, but he’s looking at the station in peace.
On the side, I checked the tickets and made a soft laugh.
“Okay. I’m sorry.
The pieces of truth.
32
After all, the scenes you fantasize about are horrible…
When I was in the car, I heard Officer Leung’s blessing, and he was in a trance.
Is that really a fantasy?
Or, some pieces of truth.
33
The children of the school, when I came to the village to teach, reaped the greatest gift.
They’re nice and warm and they appreciate it.
I saw it on my first day.
Each and every one of them is working hard to release goodwill.
That’s to cherish a hard-won teacher to keep me.
I never meant to fail them.
Zhou Xiao Wing is the most popular student in the class.
She’s clean and clean in her workbooks, takes care of all her books and raises her hands in the most serious position in the class.
I remember when she gave me the tea with the plastic bag.
She said that it was taken by her sister herself in order to heat the teachers.
So I remembered her sister’s name, Zhou Moo.
34
After the exams, I saw Zhou Moot.
Her eyes were bright and quiet, as if she were always hopeful.
Zhou Moo Moo came to school for tutoring – there was no such post, but there was a shortage of people in the school, and Zhou Moo Moo was from the village, and the headmaster opened up.
At that time, Zhou Moo Wing always stuck with me and listened to me about the big city.
Is Kentucky really good?
Is the roller coaster scary?
What if we don’t take the subway?
In the years of smartphones, the usual things are still very far from them.
I made a promise that I would take them there after I went to the provincial college this week.
Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zi Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zi Zi Zi Zi Zi Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zi Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu
Then Zhou told me:
“Be careful, Mr. Qin, the son of the village chief, Zhao Dongwai. I’m sorry.
That’s the most serious thing Zhou said to me.
35
Also on that day, Zhou Moo gave me a few bags of mandoro’s roots and leaves.
Mandrake, this is the wild flowers that are everywhere in the mountains.
Zhou Moo was so familiar with how to use and preserve it, perhaps because he grew up in the mountains.
Toxicity of seeds, roots and even leaves.
It’s the convulsion, the excitement, the illusion effect. The worst of all, it can even kill people.
She also showed me the blades in the closet.
I see only how a girl is carefully protecting herself.
I asked her, why did she do that?
Under the stars, Zhou fluffles his breath, his voice is dark.
“The first two years, Zhao winter rock raped a girl. I’m sorry.
“They say it’s 400,000. It’s private. I’m sorry.
“But who knows? No one’s seen that girl in county anymore. I’m sorry.
36
In fact, I didn’t even put the Zhao winter rock in the stream.
Since I got to school, Zhao Winterstone has tried to approach me in various ways.
But I know how to deal with people like that.
I haven’t looked good on him since the beginning, but I’m threatening to call the police whenever there’s a little out of line.
I said my cell phone, an APP with automatic alarms, a camera connected to a cloud-wide net, and the location was always on, and I gave my personal security all the guarantees.
There is a lie, but it is enough to deter the small night,
But I didn’t think.
Zhao’s eyes are on Zhou’s hair.
37
That day, it’s the day of the next grade.
I’ve got Zhou Moo’s score enough to go to college she wants.
However, when Zhou Moo came to school, she saw that she was still holding the corridor railings and she was blind.
I filmed her with care and found bruises on her face and wrist.
There’s only two of us in the office.
Zhou’s moisten is holding a cup of tea and his hands are shaking.
Zhao Winter Rock. She said, “The county, the reunion, he got me drunk with a little brother. I’m sorry.
“And then I was carried to my house by Zhao Winterstone…”
“I pulled my knife out, but I didn’t dare to kill, and I was hurt. I’m sorry.
“I’m so stupid. What poison? It’s useless. I’m sorry.
Zhou fluffy, intermittent, like a lost soul.
I was so angry. I said you had to call the police.
But Zhou Moo immediately stopped me and her voice was filled with begging.
“I’m going to college, Miss Qin. I’m sorry.
“What’s wrong with going to college? What’s good about going to college? I’m sorry.
Next, I said exactly the same thing Officer Liang said to me.
I said you were the victim.
You have to stand up!
The more you stand up, the more you’ll let that bastard go!
As a result, Zhou Moot gave me reason to shut up.
“Mrs. Ko Qin, my parents can’t hear this. I’m sorry.
“It will spread in the village. I’m sorry.
“I’ve heard them talk about girls like me. I’m sorry.
“I’m blind, ruined, dirty…”
“My dad’s working, saving for my cell phone, and my mom’s got a bad heart, and I have my sister here…”
“Mrs. Qin, he said he’d give me 400,000 and you said he would? I’m sorry.
I look at the Zhou fumigation of the pears with the rain, and I just don’t think I can use my strength.
I can’t give her a single answer.
38
In the evening, the sunset dyed the field with gold.
Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu
She didn’t notice, sister’s pace, squirt.
At night, I hid in my dorm, and for the first time I washed Zhou’s beam for my Mandrake.
A little petal, drink it, it’s not exciting, it’s not hallucinating.
Nothing can escape.
It’s just disgusting, making me throw up in the plastic bag in the dorm.
I don’t know if it’s because of the toxicity of the flowers, or because of the Zhao winter rock, or because of my incompetence.
That night, I had a dream.
I dreamt I was yelling at the mirror, saying why are you a teacher and why are you teaching?
You can’t save anyone.
39
Since then, Zhou Moo has come to school much less.
Every time I met, I didn’t know if I should ask her. How was it?
Her injuries are much better, but her eyes are getting worse and worse.
Later, less so.
Until one day, I was really worried about her and went to county high school.
The teacher told me that Zhou Moo’s admission was early.
But no one has ever taken it.
That afternoon, I was holding a letter of admission, and it was getting worse.
I found a carriage and I rushed him back to the village.
Back in time, the school was still in school.
I found Zhou Xiaoling and asked, “Where is your sister?” I’m sorry.
Zhou Xiao Wing just said, “Ah, my sister is home, and she’s been drinking white wine today, saying she’s celebrating. I’m sorry.
It’s a bad feeling. It’s getting stronger.
Celebrate.
But she didn’t even take the receipt!
I almost ran all the way back to Zhou Moo’s house.
The house was clean and clean, there was no one.
I remember Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu , who was always standing in the corridor, Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu
I remember.
That’s the direction of the Zhao Winterwa family.
40
And when I arrived at Zhao’s house, it was also quiet.
I sulked into the yard.
As soon as I got into the lobby, it smelled like blood.
I thought, “It’s over.”
I held my hand and pushed the bedroom door.
Zhou Moot, hanging in blood.
She hung herself.
At the bottom, two bodies.
41
I was completely panicking, and I carried her down, over and over.
Until, Zhou flutter coughed a few times.
I’m relieved, crying, yelling.
I said you’re so stupid! Why are you so stupid?
In that environment, I’ve lost my head and my ability to think.
And when I saw him, he cried.
Mr. Qin. I’m sorry.
She said, “I don’t have a choice. I’m sorry.
42
Zhou Moo told me that only Zhao winter rock had been able to advance once and for all when she chose to endure.
For the first time, Zhao Dongjiu used the excuse of giving money to send Zhou Moo-ho to his home again.
On that day, Zhao winter rock once again violated Zhou Moo Moo.
He put Zhou’s hair on the pig’s collar and lost all his humanity.
After that, Zhao winter rock threw only a $50 note to Zhou Moo.
Say 400,000, slowly over and over again.
Zhou Moot was desperate and she bit her teeth and said she would have called the police this time.
“Did you miss your sister? I’m sorry.
43
Zhao Winterstone simply left this sentence behind.
The rest of the day can only be described as nightmares.
Zhao winter rock used Zhou Xiao Wing as a hostage, coercing Zhou Moo.
The pigsty.
The father and the son.
It was all the hell Zhou Moo’s first-hand experience.
The only thing that sustains Zhou’s fluffling is Zhao’s verbal promise.
“Just for the summer, go to your college, I promise I won’t tell anyone. I’m sorry.
But Zhao winter rock turned back.
44
The day after the letter of admission to the university, the students went to school.
Zhao Dongjiu learned the news and found Zhou Moo.
He ordered Zhou Moo to stay away from college.
Zhou was almost mad, she was tearing Zhao’s arm, crying and scolding.
Then Zhou was knocked out.
And as Zhou was awakening, she heard his father and son.
“Dad, I’ll give you the girl. I’m sorry.
“I think her sister is pretty good. I’m sorry.
45
That conversation went through Zhou’s line of psychological defence.
Three days down, Zhou Moot didn’t sleep.
She’s watching Zhou Xiao Wing go to school, leave school, follow her step by step.
But she knows she can’t hold on.
46
“Mrs. Qin, so I’m not ready to hang in there. I’m sorry.
In blood, Zhou fluffles his face with a confused smile.
“You let me go, let me go. I’m sorry.
Zhou Moo-tao’s voice dropped, and I finally recovered my senses.
I think of the smile of her tutoring the students, and I think of her quiet and clean eyes.
I thought of Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu, and I told you Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu wo Zhu Zhu wo Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu u Zhu hu wo Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu u Zhu Zhu hu hu hu hu hu hu hu hu
Twilight came, I bit my lips.
I said, “Go away. I’m not stopping you. I’m sorry.
47
Zhou Moo, wait a minute.
I went on to say, “Get a carriage and go to the city. Do not be found, do not find it, run as fast as you can.” I’m sorry.
Zhou Moo is still waiting, and I’ve had to bring her up.
“You’re going to wear clean clothes, wear mine first, remember, to party with your classmates. Go to a crowded place. I’m sorry.
“Mr. Qin, what do you mean? I’m sorry.
“I will protect you from the big city.” I’m sorry.
“But I’m not your student. I’m sorry.
The sound of Zhou’s fluffy voice brought a cry.
“Ying is, I like her and I like you. I’m sorry.
I pushed Zhao Winterstone’s body to the bed and put it to sleep.
Then I came to him and took a close picture.
This photo was uploaded to the Internet.
“Remember the account code on the Internet, download it down, and two days later, anonymously send it to the county bar. I’m sorry.
Zhou Moo Moo just put on my clean clothes and looked at me with all his doubts.
“Mrs. Qin, what are you doing? I’m sorry.
“Remember the flowers you gave me? Mandrake. I’m sorry.
“Remember. I’m sorry.
I took the knife on the ground, bit my teeth, scratched my face.
The blood wets my eyes, and the Zhou flutter is red.
“From now on, that’s Zhao Winterstone. I’m sorry.
48
In the bloody room, I commanded Zhou to be fluffy.
“Just remember, I killed Zhao Dongjiu, you know nothing. I’m sorry.
“And I will be a madman. I’m sorry.
And Zhou’s flutter was in complete panic, and he interrupted me, and said, “How can this be?” The police won’t believe me! I’m sorry.
“Yes. I said:
I was talking about taking out a bag of Mandrake tea in my pocket.
Take out a few petals, put them in front of Zhou’s eye and stare at her.
“I will, fabricated the more absurd truth. I’m sorry.
49
First, on this night, the police will only see a woman who is mentally ill and trapped in a pigsty. I was the only suspect at the scene of the fire.
A madman killed someone. How? It’s the truth they want to know.
But the first time, I will only take Zhou’s fate to myself, not to mention my killing, but to say that I am an innocent victim.
The police must not believe, and they must want to discover the truth.
And next, I’ll admit to killing myself.
But all the stories I’m about to tell are fake.
The police would have been more interested in what was behind the illusion.
But at this point, the police will acquiesce that they have proved the truth in their hearts. That’s — I did kill people.
In the end, I’ll be honest and tell them how a lunatic killed someone.
And they won’t ask if this lunatic has killed anyone.
She’s really, really not, crazy.
50
That day, I looked at Zhou’s hair, and I looked for a long time.
And when the night came, I went back to the house and lit the house, chewing on the petals, and passed through the abdomen and the inside of the head, stinging.
The fire wasn’t meant to cover up the knife wound on Zhao’s son.
Rather, for the sake of ambiguity, they really die.
51
“But what about you?”
In the fire, I think of the last sentence left behind by Zhou Moo.
I said, “Just leave it. I’m sorry.
And in the sky of the night when my tongue was squealing, I remembered in peace, and my answer belonged to myself.
I had a kid during the study.
His dad, a pretty young doctor. On that day, he didn’t care that we had a fever to get the kids in first aid.
In the hospital, I prayed countless times to the Buddha, saying that even if I took my life, it would be better for my children.
But the grace of God and Buddha did not come.
Later I could always dream of the baby.
Then I left the city, left the child’s father and fled to this little hill village.
Zhou Moo, she’s special.
Her eyebrows, like my kids, have a mole. Her eyes are as clear as my children’s.
Even the school she applied for was the same as the school where I wanted my kids to go to.
But my kids didn’t.
I always thought she’d have a life like Zhou’s.
On the way to the pigsty, I thought of the spiders in the dormitory.
I know it. It’s called a red spider, and when a mother gives birth to a child, she lets the child eat her own body.
They’ll trade their lives for their children’s lives.
“But what about you?”
Zhou fluffy words, turn around.
I looked at her eyebrows and said, “Don’t worry.
But in my heart it is my salvation.
52
At the station, there was a sound of the train entering the station.
Officer Leung finally turned his eyes away from Zhou Moo, staring at me and saying, “Can I ask you a question?” I’m sorry.
I’d like you two to meet me in the waiting room.
And when he had gone, I asked Officer Leung, “Is this also the trial?” I’m sorry.
Officer Leung hesitated and said, “No. I’m sorry.
Ask. I’m sorry.
“If you don’t do it, she’ll be sentenced to self-defense. I’m sorry.
“However, she could not bear the cost of being exposed to it than she could have been. I’m sorry.
“Why?”
“Because she hasn’t come out of this mountain. In such an environment, there is her reputation as her family and her self-esteem, and there is a life outside which she should not be disturbed. I’m sorry.
“Well, I get it. I’m sorry.
“Really?”
“You fill yourself with dirt just to protect one’s innocence. I’m sorry.
“Yes. I’m sorry.
Officer Liang stopped and asked the last question.
“Is it worth it?”
“No, no. I’m sorry.
I answered with determination, after security checks, and went into the waiting room to meet the Zhou sisters.
I rubbed my hair with a mist and looked away at the platform.
By the platform, Zhou fluffed past. It’s where I stand on students I’ve taught briefly.
That’s a bad, simple surprise.
Clean clothes, flowers.
“But, Officer Liang.”
I brushed my ticket, waved my hand and left Officer Liang with a smile.
“I’m a teacher. I’m sorry.
Document number: YX11mRNxWPK
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
