Scattered girls

Scattered girls

♪ Fling girl ♪

Darkness and light: deep space, dream and science fiction outside of time

This is my 57th flash, and perhaps 58th. I’ve given up my count since the tenth time. As of the 30th time, I completely lost sight of these things.

It feels bad. I’m all bad. Over the past two years, there has been no stay at one location for more than half a month. And the situation will only continue to deteriorate, with no chance of improvement.

I am determined to wait until the 60th time to end this, no matter what.

The first lesson that flashes taught me is that if a person is ubiquitous in a physical sense, she is roughly equal to non-existent in the eyes of ordinary people.

My life from the age of 18 can be summed up by a word “nil.” I’m the “nil” that you’ve been staring at for so long that you can’t even recognize in your head that it’s “nil” in your eyes; I’m 100 times saturated and “nil” everywhere.

I have before me a large area of gold desert that has been blown by endless wind and sand. I went up a relatively flat top of a sand hill deep along the ridge of the new moon dune. And as far as the eyes reach, the smoke of man is cut off, and the sea of sand.

I do not know where I am at this moment, even though a minute ago I was in a luxurious city, enjoying a luxurious duck leg set that I could not afford. Things like this have been happening lately, flashing, drifting further and harder.

I’m not sure I’m still in the country.

The 40th time, I had 70% of the certainty that I was visiting the southern end of the Sinai Peninsula near the Bay of Suez. A local man wearing a red Fez hat and a fast-talking uncle dragged me to a place where I couldn’t understand the foreign language. He repeatedly called me “A Xin” “Mack Toub” and took out his mobile phone to take pictures of me, which was embarrassing to me. I learned later that “A Xin” is the Arabic-language Chinese pronunciation; “Mack Toub” is translated to mean fate.

I wish my own people were somewhere in the western corridor of the river, so that I would also have the opportunity to go to the historic city of Dungeon, where I had long been worshiping my heart, and to take a look at the site of the gates of the Jade Gate, which is a thousand years old. It would have been fine if it had been in Robpopo, and it was also a sacred place in my heart. I’ve always had this little plan to spend half a day in front of the pure grave of the explorers, and to put down a bottle of mineral water as a sign of sacrifice. Maybe it would be better to bring a beer? I can sit down on the headstones raised with red bricks and sing with wine, and go nowhere. At the moment, the dawn of sweet light appeared on the distant horizon, waiting for the shadows of mystery to descend.

Because I’m so special, I’ll always be slashed in a pocket full of emergency supplies. Whether I take a bath, sleep or go to the bathroom, I don’t take my belt off. I’m really lost when I’m out of my bag. The bag itself and the things in it are the only link left between me and the world. At least for now I’m not going to cut it off.

The hot wind is blowing in positions, the sun’s height is extreme, the dome is darkening, and no cloud can avoid tan.

I don’t know where else to go, just sit down in the shadows between the hills. There’s two complete 13-style compressed dry foods, one of which tastes of pepper salt, one of which tastes of lemon, and one bite of which lasts long enough for me, and potable water, all of which is cheap, ready to eat. I’m not looking for food, I’m looking for the little book I didn’t read. I read Kafka ‘ s ” Missing Persons ” to the chapter before the end when they had dinner. Read it before the evening arrives.

My fingers touch the smooth cover of a plain book and feel cold and stingy. A little thing like a glass button came out of it. I don’t remember it in the bag.

And We picked up that button from the edge of our feet and wiped out the sand and dust on the surface. To be exact, it’s a circle badge, 3 cm in diameter, less than 1 cm thick. A fine, delicate pattern of graft, blue, white, black, red and four, the Buddhist Mandoro flower, with a name written on the back with a clean Song.

I know this stuff.

Recently, older brothers and sisters who travel through the glass curtain wall are often seen using this to decorate their cell phones and bags, or simply not to use it as a brooch. I don’t know how it works, but it’s related to low-orbit broadband satellites and 5G. This is a self-defined remote anti-fouling device.

Someone — and I hope that this character will not be called Seo Yong, and that a stalker can’t be so confused — has drawn this little thing into my pocket while I’m not watching my duck leg. He’ll be disappointed, I don’t know who he is, but I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t care.

Three more, or two more, will be over for me forever.

Desert Sea

Say, “I will go to another country and another shore, looking for another city better than this.” I’m sorry.

– Cavafis City.

01

I’m sorry for making this so sudden. Please understand, I’ve been doing this since I was 18.

Say something funny.

One time, I sat on the corner with a “temporary meal ticket” in a Western restaurant named “Atyon Steak” waiting for someone to serve us. I call all the men I met on the road who have a clear idea of me “temporary meal tickets.”

It’s a little weird that the Western restaurant has such a name, but I don’t want to go into the story behind it. He thought about putting me to bed with this meal, and he was so naked that he could see it. And I’m looking for a stage where I can’t find a better place and an actor.

I’m tired, tired, mostly.

I was suddenly thrown here a week ago, at a flashpoint between the north-dee river and the mountain customs, facing a large road towards the condo, and I was lucky not to have been hit by a giant truck.

Before that, for the forty-first time, I was flying across a fragmented archipelago in the Philippines, 3000 km from a straight line, with no language and drifting to the local Chinese community. A Chinese family with a keen heart took the trouble I brought, without a single complaint. At some level, they misunderstood my situation and imagined that the entire process of my falling from the continent to the South Ocean was too dark and bleak.

I am responsible for poor communication, but I would also like to see this misunderstanding. The more they think about my experience, the better, so that they are ashamed to ask again and again, and I don’t have to keep lying.

Lying is exhausting, and you must have extraordinary memory and strength, and you must keep in mind all the details, and there can be no contradiction. In some cases, when you’re faced with a good and honest family, the first parents want to show the power of example in front of their own children, and silence is a strategy to save effort. The more ambiguous you are, the deeper they are, the easier they will be to fill their own minds from the cracks that you reveal, and to add to their own souls a sad past that you are ashamed of.

The family was talking in the middle of a tunnel with a string of shrimp in every sentence. I speak only Mandarin and high school English, which, as I hear, is almost as hard to understand as Filipino. On the other day, I learned from their seven-year-old daughter Saramart, whose “thank you” in Galo.

I bought a boat ticket for a decent man to take me from the northern coast of Bene Island to Manila via Mindoro Island. When I get to Manila, I can fly back to Beijing from Aquino International Airport, or anywhere in the country.

My family, Wei, was kind enough to help me, and they sold to the locals of the island a water cell that they had picked up from north China. It was a nice little day at first, a little downhill in recent years. There was a change in mind, but no way forward.

When I sailed, I found out that the compassionate hostess had snuck me a roll of Philippine pesos bound with rubber bands to buy air tickets. A Chinese note has also been carefully attached to remind me not to make money in front of locals. The nation’s ethnic group is torn apart and divided between rich and poor, and the people at the bottom of the country are deeply gruesome and sometimes view rich Chinese as prey. I counted, 40,000 yuan, converted the exchange rate into 5,000 yuan.

The problem is that I don’t need to fly anywhere, and when the time comes, I’ll disappear and I can’t stay. The family was sincere in its kindness, and had no doubt that I had written it, and did everything in its power to help. I can’t take their money, I can’t take it, but I don’t know how to send it back. – Lack of language and documentation. This thing tortured me for a while.

When I got off the boat, I gave the money to the staff of the Chinese Embassy in Fhi, making up as much as possible a reasonable history, providing the family name and a general address, in the hope of returning it to its original owners. Instead of giving staff a chance to speak, I fled north of the road on the pretext of jumping through a window in the toilet and trying to get to Olong Apo, a small port in the south-west of Luzon Island, before the summer typhoon or the next round of flashes arrived, looking at the beautiful blue South Sea, the broken islands and the white sand of the green tree.

I’m a little older than I am, I’m a little taller than I am, black and thin, and I’m the one with the energy and attention deficit. He’s got a mossi-dry head like a sickle cut, and that little yellow hair in his head smells like a lot of free shampoo, since it’s a little town C.

He’s not the most rude, straight-out type of guy I’ve ever met, but he’s got a tumultuous male hormone all over him, like he’s going to blow up under the bed without a girl for three days. It’s not as bad as the middle-aged men, who’ve been gibberishing their horns, who’ve got no balls.

In my third flash, I knew nothing about what I had suddenly acquired and what I was in. I woke up in my sleep, dressed in a long dress, barefoot, twitching in the G212 Sichuan section, with a mountain on my left hand and a river on my right hand. It’s almost dark, and I don’t know what I’m gonna do, so I have to have the courage to hold up the first car I saw with my thumb up.

It was a big truck full of cargo, and when the door was opened, it came to the fore with a gruesome odour of fox. The driver was a man with a very strong nose, and for years on the road, he saw me as such a lowly, helpless girl.

“I can give you a ride, with conditions. * He doesn’t talk to my face, he just looks down on my frozen toes.*

“What terms?”

“You have to open your mouth. He stares at my bare feet, and his big throat swallows, “A girl of your age has done it with his little boyfriend many times, you know what I mean. I’m sorry.

I didn’t know, but I saw his dirty, dark blue jeans, with a small band of drums on the side of his crotch, and he jumped and he got it.

His twitched eyes and his twitched nose told me that it had been said, and if I refused, there was no one around, he would have hurt me on the spot.

“Okay… okay…”

“Aye”?

“Well…”

“You can’t stop here for long until I drive to the service area. The ugly thing is, you’re in love with me and you don’t want to jump in the middle of something stupid. You jump in this wilderness, you kill yourself, I don’t care. I’m sorry.

It’s already dark since he drove the car to the service area.

He asked me to sit in the co-pilot seat, to tie my hands with my seatbelt, and to watch him pull his pants open a little bit, saying that it was most exciting for him.

When he pulled the zipper to the last slot, I screamed and fell in front of him.

02

I met C. on the gold beach in the old mountain customs area. To be precise, I was sitting alone on the beach watching the sunrise and thinking about where I was going.

I often feel like I’m running away from an irresistible force. I need to leave, go somewhere else, anywhere, as long as I’m on the road, where I’ve never been before. I’ve been walking along the sea for a week, and the Qin Emperor is tired of it. The industrial ports in the North are too serious and busy compared to the thousands of island relics that have shattered a sea in the South. The heavy rains will reach the previously depressed and hot weather, contrasting artificially constructed beaches and the inner sea surrounded by steel and cement, which I love.

I walk in the streets and it is difficult to integrate into the environment, even though I and the locals have been through the wind and the sun for years and years.

And when I come back, when the sun rises, there will be little eyes like wolves behind me.

I’m sure he has a “fly” in his name. At 5:00 a.m., it was only me and his beach. He asked me if I had run away. I say yes or no. He’s showing the bad laugh he understands.

“I was a little girl as skinny as a stray cat when I was a kid, and I wanted to take her home and raise her. He’s not ashamed.

He has three words in his sentence, and I don’t want to point out his pedophile tendencies. Yeah, I’m on the same track: “I’d rather be a man than a motherless, homeless little girl.” Young and bullying, hugging up and having fun, meeting the psycho-physical needs of perverts, and without fear of subsequent trouble. I’m sorry.

“Are you a child?” He’s disgruntled.

“As compared to you, it certainly counts. I’m sorry.

“You’re funny, what’s your name?” Be my girlfriend, I’ll feed you. I’m sorry.

“Fuck you. I’m sorry.

“I’m serious, I’m serious. I’m sorry.

“Me too. I’m sorry.

Small City C. Ro is not the kind of guy who blackmails a woman with violence. He’s only 20 years old, in his second year of high school, and he has fantasies about the future. Far from being abandoned in the same way as a middle-aged truck driver who had experienced two divorces, had no one-time life throughout the year, had three hemorrhoids surgery and had been unable to recover.

Part of the reason is that he was too proud and self-confident about his body, which was fully trained in muscles, and convinced that the girls would always be conquered by the male hormones that he released on the field or between the beds. So far, he’s got some charm in his “temporary meal ticket.” I don’t hate him. I just don’t call him.

He says I’m a hungry ghost and he wants me to eat. We sat across the corner from the “Atton Steak.”

I’ve never had steak before, just watching people eat on TV. After the last trip to the Philippines, I had none left in my pocket.

I don’t know how to use a knife or fork. He sat across from me, showing a frightful and unexpected laugh, as if he was as smart as he, through these little details, as if he had taken the upper hand of the relationship and ripped me off my panties tonight.

He asked me why I didn’t like steaks. I learned his moves, I spent my old nose trying to cut off a small piece of blooded beef. He stares at me all the time, and his little eyes stare at the boss: “No way! You’re not going to eat steak for the first time? Ha ha ha ha! “The people around us are attracted to us by his silly laughter.

I swallowed that half-baked beef with my eyes on it, and my face rose to the point, and the white light flashed and disappeared.

It’s time to introduce yourself.

My name is Jiang Qi, and this year I am 20 years old.

My mother’s name is Jiang Zeqi, and as I grew up, I had three fathers who came and left, not even my father.

I do not know the name of my biological father, why he disappeared from his mother and from my life, or whether he was alive today. I was born with my mother’s last name and thought it was common for a child to have his mother’s last name. Like having a girl or a boy, half-on-half probability. It didn’t happen until we got to the same table in primary school.

When I was 17 years old, my mother, at the instigation of a Taiwanese man who had never met in reality, mortgaged the property, loaned 500,000 dollars to the bank to fire off foreign currency, convinced that she was only one step away from achieving freedom of wealth. Proves ex post that it was an accurate fraud that was designed to target her. She was deceived by the other side in half an hour by half a million dollars and went bankrupt at the speed of the hour, leaving a huge debt that could not be repaid.

In order not to take the house away from the bank, the mother sold me for a 150,000 bride price. The first time I ran home stupidly. Early the next morning, she turned her head and sold me further away for 300,000.

I can have everything today to thank her.

03

There’s always a sign before the flash. Most of the time, it’s like a sneeze that tickles but can’t get out. You can’t control when you want to sneeze, when it’s starting to itch in your nose, what you can do is hold your breath and don’t hair, or just look up for the sun.

My first 10 flashes are equivalent to instantaneous natural disasters, with passivity, frequency and uncertainty, and a certain cyclicality.

Now, in retrospect, the first 10 times were undoubtedly the hardest, perhaps the most dangerous. Consternation, terror, pure chaos and ignorance of the status quo. It took a long time to force yourself to face the reality. I am very glad that I didn’t do anything stupid, hurt others and kill myself because of panic, pain and despair.

I was atheism to the bone from my childhood when I was the opposite of my mother. I do not believe that a high god has cursed me, and that is what heaven has tested me for, and that I must complete my mission to be freed. The size of the world, sometimes it’s something that looks unimaginable, for example, when tornados roll down thousands of live fish from 200 kilometres away, and I happen to be the one hit in the head by a fish.

Once the most difficult and helpless start has been made, the next steps will be a little more straightforward. To survive, I started to record data and try to collate and analyse my eccentric abilities overnight.

I put my time and place on every flashback, and all the good things I did, in a yellow, waterproof booklet, called “No Handbook.”

Flashing is always passive, independent of my will, every 14 days on average. In response, I have come up with a theory that may be related to the psychological stress that I have. 14 days, two weeks, is a critical point. Beyond this point, any change in internal and external factors is likely to trigger a flash-off by pulling the trigger.

My first 10 flashes were in the 600-km radius, the Brown movement. From hills or plains below 500 metres above sea level to basins or plateaus above 1,000 metres above sea level, there is no regularity between flashpoints.

Day and night, any place, no matter what I’m doing for a second, the next second could suddenly disappear empty. Villages, fields, reservoirs, mountain roads, towns, no matter who they are, indoors and outdoors; underground supermarkets at 3:00 a.m., rotting tails and even someone’s home. In theory, it is possible for any space to appear in a place hundreds of kilometres away.

This indescribable sense of time and space has torn me apart from within. If it does not stop and it cannot be contained, then at least I have to provide a minimum guarantee of my ability. Otherwise I can’t live. I’ll go crazy if I lose control.

Imagine what if I went into my sleep into an abandoned bomb shelter buried deep beneath the ground with no light on my hands and a rusty blast-proof door lock? Or between two walls? Falling into red iron water? There’s no sense of security in this life. How do I know if the next flash is my death?

One day, after all my luck, I’ll drown under people’s feet, like a stray cat washed into a sewer by a storm. No one knew I was dead until a decade later, or until the body stenched.

When I was 13, I was almost self-destructive, walking into a luxury store at the West Annan Gate SKP. He only wants to find a rich man with no eyes to die with, so that he can feel my anger and despair.

I was an 18-year-old girl with a mess from head to toe, 12 flashes in a row, hair was dry for six months, hair bras were swollen, wearing T-shirts, work pants twice as dirty as hair, and it was a miracle that the security guards could put me in. I’m afraid to look up at people, and I’m more afraid of people coming to me. I’m going to look into anyone’s eyes, and I’m going to go from cheek to ear.

The shopkeeper who came to me was a 20-year-old boy.

I’m not good at judging the age of the opposite sex. I guess he’s getting old. He had a pink face compared to me, and the whole face was so obnoxious. The jaws were unwieldy, glided on the blizzards, wearing large black round-frame glasses, with long limbs thin and elegance, but with no sign of behaviour, giving only the feeling of clumsy hands. When I first looked at him, I knew that he usually played too many games at home, was weak, had an innate personality, was harmless, had no girlfriend, grew up without worries, was the type I hated.

Not far away, the high-bone, high-profile shopkeeper gave him a distasteful look, asking him to deal with my trouble, and then turn his face into a “three-metre-six-toothed” professional smirk to receive customers. He looks like he’s in a bit of a difficult position, and he scratches his hair.

“Can I help you? ”He finally said something. It’s not as naive as I thought.

“You stand still and help me.” I said:

And while he looked to his left and right, I grabbed a sleeve and smelled it. I must smell something I can’t smell. Maybe it smells like gunpowder. I’ve recently been addicted to washing my face with half a cent of Shanghai sulfur soap.

I don’t know if he’s a casual worker or a relationship in the back, and he doesn’t seem to have the capacity to be a shopkeeper. And in front of him, I took a thousand-dollar coloured tweezer bag, and held it to my chest, and decided to use it as an emergency package.

The director of the store reacted very quickly, making gestures to hold the door and calling for security. He’s so close to me, and he’s in such a state of disarray. Must have been in the greenhouse for too long, forgetting what life is like when people are essentially beasts.

This one that’s not my luxury burned me all over.

Those who look at me, those who look at me, those who look at me, those who dress up, those who don’t care, the parents who take care of their children, are all pointing at me and poking at me. They’re looking at me, and they’re laughing.

“What a ugly girl.

“Look at her clothes and shoes. It’s dirty, it’s dirty, it’s unbridled, it’s disgusting.

“Where are the parents and the children are so crazy that they don’t care? If this was my kid, would you have given her a big mouth? I’m sorry.

And I forced myself to stand up, proud of their humiliation and their scolding.

Those things that don’t kill you only make you stronger. I can feel that an invisible finger has pulled the trigger and that a flash driven by a rolling hate will come any minute. They don’t understand where I’ve been and what I’ve seen. On this occasion, I will use my power to harm these happy, self-satisfied frogs, and to scare them into screaming and running in front of me, and I will run to a place thousands of kilometres away with trophies and laugh proudly at the sky.

“Sorry. The shopkeeper, who came to me with his body to hold back the people around me, couldn’t stand the anger, as if he were apologizing to me for those people.

I don’t understand why he’s doing this. His inexplicable pity and alms left me in the mood and ruined my plan. I don’t get this guy.

“Do not listen to them; they do not know what they are saying. Those who have not suffered, are standing in the crowd, not because it makes sense, but because it is the easiest. “He nodded at me in a tense and frank place, he squeaked his mouth and squeezed his smile, “It’s okay, you like the bag, right? I’ll tell the manager I’ll buy you this month’s pay. It doesn’t matter if you’re a little young and you’re having trouble. You’re still long enough to keep a record of this. I’m sorry.

Backwards? Leave a record on this? He doesn’t know what kind of consciousness I’m standing here trying to break up with everyone in the world.

I was staring at him so hard.

He smiled and noded.

Enough!

He tried so hard to reach out to me, that he was about to touch me, and in sight I was gone.

04

For the first time, I was sold on the town fair, and the whole process was so old and so quiet.

I was so hot in my ears, I sneezed and sneeze, and I was paranoid all day and I felt like a storm was coming. My sixth sense was right. Mother’s agent put my information on the market, secretly looking for me!

In case someone doesn’t know what the city is, I’ll explain. In small places with small numbers of men and women, local town fairs usually have a special corner, where they gather media people who have information about young married women and single boys who want to marry.

Bridging a daughter through the market is a typical seller’s market. The woman’s family came in for the bride price, which is called “sale” and the man’s gift is called “buy”. It’s not just about money to get married. First you get past the media, then the women. You’ll be able to talk to your future mother-in-law about the bride price.

Of course, I am a special case. I was a few days away from being 18 years old, and I wasn’t old enough to look for people in the market, even if the blind media knew I couldn’t do that. For an exceptional case like mine, there’s a “Ri City” that is open only to the natives who know everything, and imagines the dark corners of the adult city.

Mother’s in a hurry to sell me for money. Pay and deliver. She doesn’t care if she’s a cat or a dog. As to whether the act is illegal or not, I can only say that the middle-aged women of a small town like their mother, who are brainwashed by short video waterfalls, are convinced that a bowl of blizzard will cost 32 cyanide, Wifi radiation will lead to male infertility, with very simple legal concepts in their heads. Talk about irregularities? She sincerely felt that nothing would happen as long as she was not caught by the police.

So I was sent to a small village that could not be found on the map, handed over to a 40-year-old mason, and asked for 150,000. I wasn’t even 18, and the matchmaker lied about my age.

The masons are so mean, at least in front of me. He had a rough skin like a roll of red sand paper that had been polished. I couldn’t take a closer look at him and said I believed him when he was 60.

And he started to talk to me, and he was the only one who was saying, “I listened in peace.”

He was a senior at home with two brothers and a sister. Big brother died of stomach cancer the other year, bought a suite in the city, and her sister married out of town years ago. It is their custom to wait for the brothers to get married before it is his youngest marriage. His first date was 26 years old, 20 years old. These years of working have saved a little money and left a disease behind.

He had long been numb and felt the future was dark and ready to die alone. Even if you’d had a wife from outside, you wouldn’t have a heart. Maybe they took the bride price and got married and ran off in a few days.

I think he’s a victim, too, of money and feelings being cheated by his mother and the media. People are not bad people, they can communicate, and they don’t force me to do anything. But I can’t take my life for pity.

I’ve learned that there’s about 20 percent good people and 20 percent bad people in the world; the remaining 60 percent can’t be good or bad, just follow the flow and follow instincts. Whenever their voice is loud, they listen.

When it was dark, the teacher took out a bunch of rotten linen that they used to tie their pigs’ mouths when they were killing pigs in New Year’s, and tied my hands and feet, and said I was afraid I’d run away. And We vowed to him that I would not, but how all that was in his heart broke free and fled. It seems to me that his various measures to restrict my personal freedom are like children’s play, and perhaps he knows in his own heart that I am too young to do so wrong and cannot last.

A week later, I escaped from the village and never saw the mason again.

05

There’s a red stain on the dunes 10 meters from me.

I went over there and stepped on my foot, and it was a red medical garbage bag with a hole in it, half covered in fine grain sand. Through the hole, I saw white bird remains in the bag.

The bag was marked with a black biological hazard, under which I could not understand it. Only characterized, like Arabic, but certainly not Arabic. It’s supposed to be an Arabic-speaking relative, one of the flashy linguists. Hebrew? If it were Hebrew, I would be out of the country.

This contaminated waste, presumably from a nearby biological laboratory, was taken to the middle of the desert for local burial. That’s funny. I almost found myself a giant fungus growing in a dry zone.

It is not dark yet, and the ridge of the dunes is a clear and dark line of high contrasts, with the dark, red desert sea, on one side, and the dark side of the wide and silent moon, on the other, rapidly sinking.

In the desert, the temperature is very different day and night. I sat on this bright side on my knees, playing with the unknown Mandrake. The book has been read, and the ending can only be said to make me feel worse. A little chilly wind and sand for me to blow up the sea of Liu with my own scissors, and face the sea of sand that is about to fall.

I knew it would happen sooner or later. What did you say? God is fair, and that’s what’s done to you, and that’s what’s done to you.

This is my 57th flash, and for two years it’s been growing in scale and distance. From a few basic figures, 71 per cent of the Earth’s surface area is sea and sea, and only 29 per cent of land, about 20 per cent of which is desert and 25 per cent is frozen. Once I’ve had enough time, I run to a place where humans can’t survive and die within 14 days is just a matter of time.

Even if the cruel Mother Nature hadn’t killed me, my chances of dying at the hands of fellow human beings were rising. Recently, I have been repeatedly present in the wrong place at the wrong time, repeatedly involved in fighting between armed forces in areas of which God knows, most recently in the alley. I saw with my own eyes those small, consumer-grade drones with homemade bombs that burst into the enemy, and the bakeries that are operating in the middle of the day turned into hellfire, and the living were blown into a blood fog in front of my eyes by the powerful wind of an explosion.

I shivered under a pile of rubble, biting my fist and screaming silently, and I was afraid to move, dripping water and rice and pissing in my pants until the exchange of fire stopped, which was often a few days later.

In retrospect, from the first flash, fate was destined. Saved my power, eventually killed me.

I am not so brave, so optimistic that one can face the breaking hammer that is bound to fall without knowing when. There is nothing worse than living a day in fear and despair.

I want to end it all when the 60th flash comes.

Actually, it doesn’t matter what the number is, as long as it can be divided by five. The limit is more a sense of ritualism, which is used to set deadlines and strengthen resolve. I don’t want to drag on while I’m young, 20, almost the best age for a girl. A short and bright life is better than a life sentence. If I had to choose, I would not hesitate to choose the former.

It is no longer possible to shift responsibility to the future and to live this life until the age of forty and fifty. All alone, nobody knows.

I dare not to think that 20 years later, that old man, I was taken away from my face and my health by timeless, left with heartbreaks, loneliness and hate. Not even the courage and strength of self-destructiveness have been lost. It has been a long night in the deserts of the diaspora. It has been a long night. Life is about quality, not just length. What’s the use of living so long? No, I can’t.

I want to finish my story with my will in my best age.

For the 60th.

06

There is a journey ahead of me that never ends and cannot go back.

With regard to travel, there is such a statement. When you travel long enough and long enough, you always meet someone special to you from the point of view of probabilities and tourism psychology. The problem is that I was not warned in advance that it was a cruel thing to meet someone who loved each other during the journey. In the end, you have to wave goodbye.

I finally appeared in a relatively decent image in a city that was better suited to myself, after 14 flashes before the roller coaster went off and left no room for breath. Like a 2-year-old baby, finally learned to walk independently. The flashing continues to haunt me every hour, but I have also come to a conclusion of how to respond, at least not as early as it was, and has been frightened by events.

I was psychologically in the watershed, and the strange, mind-blowing man I met at the West Annan Gate SKP and what he said to me was still affecting my feelings. I am aware that it is not a long-term solution to be buried in a state of bad and bad governance.

Some thoughts begin to haunt me in the middle of the night. Are there people like me who have special abilities? From a probabilistic point of view, I can’t be the only alien of nearly 8 billion human beings, and I’m far less important and unique. Shouldn’t I risk exposing myself to the same kind?

The word is the same, and it scares me, like a baby, to snuggle under the sky bridge.

I have seen novels, cartoons and films, and I know that freaks like myself, psychiatric hospitals, special prisons, research institutions and public interest cemeteries are the most likely places of return. I don’t want to be caught by a vicious organization, leaving only the brain in the jar, for the research of the scientific freaks in the white coat.

Even if there are people out there who can’t control themselves, it must be good to contact them. I can’t see. There is more uncertainty and risk in dealing with the same person than the average person. How do I know each other must know better than me and be better at doing better than me?

People always make the same mistake, pinning their hopes on people who never know and expect strangers to discover and appreciate their own strengths and values that they do not know. Isn’t it enough that our family was deceived? That’s enough. I want to be careful, it’s exactly what we call the same.

In those sleepless nights, I set the rules, most of which have been so far.

I have written several different versions of background stories with multiple identity cards stolen from others to cover my real name and origin on different occasions. I’ve been alive at the legal level, and I even took the time to get this passport in my real name. I swear never to mention my flash to anyone. In the country, people are integrated as soon as they arrive at a new location, imitating local accents and living habits, and doing nothing significant.

In all cases where the conditions are appropriate, I do part-time work without the identification of documents and earn a living. And when the mountains are exhausted, and it is necessary for them to flash and rob, in principle, We only rob the rich, and choose the big brands that are hidden in high-end malls, up high and high, and do not disturb the small front of the street.

I have never directly harmed anyone at the physical level, never stealing money that exceeds my legitimate needs, just enough to keep me alive for the short term.

In a way, I’m proud of my abilities and self-control by looking at myself as a brave and timid man. You know, just a few months ago, I was a little girl who had been sold twice in a row to play games. And right now, for good or for bad, the little girl has to take her own destiny firmly.

Until death.

07

The first time I saw her, I would never forget.

To be precise, we ran into each other under the wheel of Wuhan Guangya. That was my 15th flash, and in mid-June, the three towns of Wuhan entered the moist season. At night, there was a little rain, and the neon lights in the coloured colours were running through the water dance floor.

She rides black to sell little electric donkeys, crashes me from behind at a speed of 7 metres per second and cuts out a 10-cm long wound on the inside of my left thigh. For the following two years, the scar remained visible and the pain was hidden from the rain.

I remember the day she bumped into me, wearing a big, nice red suit, light blue radish pants, long hair. The moment when the helmet was removed, an apricot with an accelerant, tearing almonds, with a wet hair, squeezing the arc in the wind, like a little flower wood in a male dress.

She left on National Boulevard and went north around the island to deliver snail powder. The owner, who was her university principal, had started a business with money from the old man and opened a shop in the alley. In order to save costs, low quality packaging was used.

When she went to the China-China University of Technology to deliver her last meal, the plastic lunch box was broken and her red suit was dipped in hot screwdriver soup. She was pushed repeatedly and repeatedly by the guests on the telephone, and the rain gradually grew. When she came back with her hands and feet changing her meals, she ran over an orange kitten while she stopped at the school entrance. When she returned from her previous path, when people came to her in haste, crying for her little cat body in her arms, crouched on the wet pebble steps, and the cold rain gathered at the bottom of her feet and hit me again because of a brake failure.

According to her, it was the worst day of her life. For me, it was a beautiful, unforgettable day to put aside physical pain.

For a moment, she thought I was dying, too, because the mouth of my left thigh was cut open by metal. I don’t want to sit around the road and insist on walking, just a little bit of saliva. She asked me where I was going. I said under the bridge. She was scared. She had to take me to the hospital.

On the way to the hospital, I asked her her name. She has lost her ability to think with the blood flowing in front of her eyes, and there’s a blank in her mind, basically she answers whatever I ask and tells me her personal information without reservation.

She did not understand why I had acted so calmly and in a manner that, frankly, I did not feel so bad. The physical pain is my old man, some of whom I’ve been out for a long time, floating in the air, watching me under cold eyes, and some of whom I’ve been ready to die at all times.

Her name is Dilling Rain, 20 years old, and Wuhan University’s insurance specialty. However, she decided to take a year off from school, to walk around and experience life in the best of her life, threatening to sever relationships with parents who had no idea. She has studied her own drawings from junior high and hates the insurance profession she was forced to choose, and the ideal for the future is to be a knowledgeable artist with a personal exhibition at least once in her life.

She has an ambitious set of world-wide plans: to go to countries, civilizations to take the wind and enrich herself; to collect the debris of the 20th century, predicting the next decade of great trends, to become a small part of our history of cultural revival, so that the next generation of children will no longer have to put their hearts and dreams far away; and to complete that long-prepared milestone during a year’s break.

Last month she travelled seven days to Egypt, from under the Cairo Sphinx, to Luxor, where the earth’s remains are, to Hoang Saab, to Aswan, where the house is colorful, and to Alexandria, where history and modern architecture intersect. She was most impressed by the white and long shores of the Mediterranean, by the free and comfortable cats of the sea, and by the fact that the young people of the region sat on the flood-proof embankment and fell in love, and the day ended. She finally returned to Cairo, where she boarded.

She’s got a nice voice, sweet silk. It’s a pain in the ass. I encouraged her to go on, so I could distract. The ER doctor had a steady hand, and the wound was only 7 stitches.

Next she’s going to the former South, Serbia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Montenegro, for a nine-day free trip. She knew a talented senior who had graduated and went to the middle iron and was currently working in Serbia. Through the local travel agency, she received an invitation to enter Montenegro. She’s got a regular delivery at the Grills, saves enough for the trip and leaves next week without my accident.

“Then you’re lucky I wasn’t someone else. People don’t talk like me. I’m playing the fun track.

She’s been shaking ever since we got to the hospital. She’s pale and she’s been biting her thumbnails for something, probably bleeding. Even so, I’ve been asked to sign and stitch my needle. Seeing her running, being honest, trying to make up for her mistakes, I don’t really want to talk to her.

“Don’t be afraid. I’m a good guy. I won’t blackmail you. I’ll take care of my medical expenses and treat me to dinner. Next week you leave the country as well. But you have to promise me that the little electric donkey is going to die. I told her when I got out of the emergency room.

She looked at me with apologies and shame: “It’s all my fault, I feel so bad.” I thought I was ready, but the moment I got out of control, I was completely stupid and I didn’t know what to do. It was my fault. I almost killed you. I’m sorry.

“Ride in the rain. Who doesn’t have a foot slide yet? Don’t think about it. You lead the way, I’m starving. I’m sorry.

It’s weird that when she came up to help me, our bodies felt the same way. She smells of apricot gum in her wet hair and a sour snail in her coat.

We stepped on the rain beats, walked east and west along the walking street, stopped, ate, ate and wandered, went into the alleys of the corner, and sat down with a small house called “Fly.”

The boss recognized her, noded her head and took two red oils to the table. It’s full of red soup, it’s exciting, it’s packed with real white shrimp.

And I swallowed water, and so did she, and the two hungry hands were enough for the same pair of chopsticks. There was heavy rain outside the alleys, and the hologram lamps were softly flashing under the short trees. Two complete strangers, entangled in their fingers, electrocuted and frightful.

She invited me to stay in her single apartment for a few days, and as compensation for me, she said I could stay until next week when she was out of her way and her roommate moved out to live with her boyfriend. It’s just me and her, and no one else. She vowed never to ask questions and respect my privacy. Look at this. She thinks I’m a runaway fool.

“What the hell is that? Wuhanmei is dying in the rainy season. Listen to me. I’ll take care of you, otherwise the wound will be infected. I’m sorry.

“You’re very kind, but I don’t like to bother anybody at home. I’m sorry.

“Please, I’m in pain. Give me a chance to redeem myself.” I’m sorry.

“Hmm. I looked at her in silence, trying to draw some shadows from her of a plot, and it was in vain. She lives in two very different worlds. It is undeniable that in some respects we seem to be attractive to each other and very similar.

“You talk too little just because I’m talking. You haven’t told me your name yet. I’m sorry.

“My name? “I blinked and looked at her, and three pseudonyms accompanied by three background stories appeared in my mind. But they’re not me, they’re my fictional characters, not me who actually exists all the way here.

“My name is Jiangjima. “I’ve come a long way.

It’s just a name, but what about the unexpected relief? Almost broke my heart.

“Hello, Jiangjima. Your name is as lovely as yours. I wish we could meet each other at another time and place. I’m sorry.

“Yes, I’ll hit you next time. I’m sorry.

She laughed. I looked at her and laughed to cover my heart up.

It’s been a long time since I left home, probably too long, and no one ever called me by my name.

08

Bad luck. During the night, the wind became more windy and the air became dusty, and soon the stars in the night sky became invisible.

I covered my head with my coat, facing the back of the dunes, and raised my body to form a human sand wall on the sand dunes slope, waiting for a sandstorm to pass or not to fall into a dream. If I fall asleep and wake up in the morning and not be buried alive by dust a few metres above my head, then I win. But how many times can a victory be like this?

My face is covered in ash, my nose and my mouth filled with dust, and every small breath of the pulmonary leaf is in secret pain. If I survive this time, I’ll go to the hospital and wash my own lungs.

The sound of constant wind and sand reminds us of the static noise of the old radio “ho-ho-ho.” Half asleep, my thoughts float. I dreamt that I was in a white paper box, naked, with two high-lighted stage lamps on the right and the left, covered in trees, close and far away, covered with grass and fog.

I’ve been dazed to think that it’s not the 60th time I’m going to die, and it’s always the same. All you have to do is sleep and let go in your dreams. What’s the need to stay strong? What’s the point? No one’s waiting for me at a distance. It’s a sandstorm that destroys the only view.

I fell asleep and dreamt back that summer by the Yangtze River. I kissed her with a silver earring under a strange pepper tree. And she kissed me back, and a greasy smell of iron melted between our incendiary and shivering lips.

It’s all over long ago.

One heart for another

09

“The lonest whale in the world” — what they call the statue on the saloon gold beach.

My seventh flash was in front of the Temple of Guangfu.

A young husband and wife from Henan who came to Guedong for their honeymoon passed by me. I happen to hear that the husband, in his native language, is listing to his wife the Internet spots where he can play cards without paying. When the two of them went away, I looked at the temples and the mountains around Shao-sul, and I came, and there was no better place.

I was on the 40-road bus, westward, halfway down, and it took almost four hours to get to my destination.

I remember very much that day was particularly windy. Maybe it’s my luck. There’s almost no one on the beach. There’s only one little girl in a red dress with a kite accompanied by her father. The kite fell and was swallowed up by a row of waves.

The living whale statue “grounded” on a golden beach, with its huge head and tail struggling to discover the absence of the sea. The whales are so close to the sea that they cannot reach it. No wonder they are the most lonely whale in the world.

The sea wind blew into positions, and the cry of the little girl and the sound of the sea waves came from far and near. The sun warms the sand and the sea, and the sand and the waves glisten with ignominy. And We leaned on a giant whale, and We breathed a wet and salty wind, and hid in the shadow of a statue.

They say spiritual creatures can predict their own death, and whales are one of them.

When a whale dies, the big body slowly sinks into the sea. The size of the whale is very large, and the fall has taken several months. Ultimately, whale bodies are sank at the bottom of the dark and desolate sea floor, surrounding the bodies and forming a unique deep-sea ecosystem.

When I saw it and touched it with my own hand, I couldn’t help but connect the whale to the uncontrollable power I acquired.

Sometimes I feel like a dead whale, slowly, silently and inevitably in the darkness. From a broader perspective, individual will is irrelevant in this process. I can’t stop anything but passive participation and recording the occurrence of anomalies, which are reconstructed once and for all until the energy of life is exhausted.

It was on this day that I named my abilities “Flight.”

Every flash, the big, darker, colder body slides to the deeper, darker, colder depth, further away from the glowing sea above its head. I have the feeling that the road ahead is one of non-return, and that eventually people will die. I just wish I could leave something to the world like a whale after he died.

When I look back as a passing person and look back at the tracks, even I am shocked. There was a period when I was so lacking in self-esteem that I followed the words of my mother. She said, “It’s good for me,” and pushed me step by step into the abyss, and I knew she was welcome to do so.

In my decade and a half, my mother taught me the same story. The day I was born, it was also her ghost door, the closest to death in her life. This story has been told so many times that I know every detail.

I was born in the hottest summer ever in 50 years, and my mother was taken to the county hospital one day before the birth. The doctor said my head was too big for a caesarean section. The mother strongly disagreed that she regarded my head as a high-intellectual and extraordinary symbol, insisting on giving birth in order not to destroy my talents or the hopes of the family.

She was in pain for a day and a night, with her mouth repeatedly hovering on three fingers, and when the birth was finally visible, there was a blackout in the hospital. She described to me the heat waves in the maternity ward and the suffocating smell of blood. I was born, and she was notified of her illness because of haemorrhaging. No family member could sign, and she climbed up and signed for herself. Her condition is in urgent need of blood transfusions, and the blood bank at the county hospital is strained, and she must be given blood at the initiative of someone who knows her, so that she can be bled. It is useless to call people dead, either on the transfer road or lying dead. She chose to transfer.

A middle-aged man who came to the county ‘ s wholesale market for sports supplies scratched three long blood marks on his arm while eating in a noodle shop. He came to the county hospital for rabies and ran into the door. The middle-aged men also gave their own blood and saved the mother ‘ s life. He divorced his wife and became my first father.

You can say that at some level I owe my mother a life.

She’s been suffering for three lifetimes. In the middle of the year, all you want is a little money and a good life. And you asked her what a good day it was, and she couldn’t say it, just said it wasn’t right.

She was a real-life activist who never stopped thinking about why she did it, not why she did it, never reflecting on herself, just following the instincts of the body and chasing the unwitting agitation. Many times, she makes me feel like an incomprehensible, inexhaustible, terrifying nature itself. In some ways, I inherited her. She’s getting further away, more wrong. So that, in the end, all three of my stepfathers sought to protect themselves from her, and saw her as a plague. No one can stop her, not even herself.

We were unable to bring her back, and she could not see my daughter, except for endless greed and madness. When a man yearns for something too long to be desired, thirst itself becomes the meaning of life. You forced her to stop, it was like killing her. Even if I wanted to wake her up, I couldn’t do it alone.

So in the end, I let her sell me, sell me for the first time and then for the second time. That’s the last thing I can do for her. She’s my mother and I love her. She broke my heart and ruined my first half of my life.

From now on, we will go our separate ways.

10

In an underground bar in the Asian region of Istanbul, the local famous jazz band is preparing to perform. The “Blue Eyes” chain, full of ceilings, flashes, reminds me of an old friend.

I sat under a dark light, without fear of exposing my identity, learning from the actions of the people around me, lifting up half a glass of lemonade and paying tribute to the artists who came in. The female singer lifts the microphone. She’s a beautiful, classical Greek goddess. Quick, improvising bullets fill the entire underground space, and everyone is smiling and windy.

A friendly adult golden hair dog was at my table, crouched on the oak chair opposite me, and the hairy dog’s tail followed the guitar hand’s rhythm.

“Look, what a nice atmosphere. Me, the grunts, and a dog. I said to the dog, “I don’t expect a response. The dog softly said yes to me.

“Sit at the table, I tell you. I’ve been to this bar before, for the 36th time, and I’ve been working black for six days, and I’ve been eating. The boss is an English-speaking Korean Christian, and it’s strange that he went to Little Atrocist. We didn’t get a chance to get in touch. I’m with everybody. The last day I slipped, a lira didn’t make. I’m sorry.

The dog started laughing.

“You’re also a strange, story dog, right? I’m sorry.

The music was loud, and I had to yell in order to make sure they didn’t hear my sentence. “Meeting is fate. We’re friends. I don’t really like dogs. You dogs are so familiar, you look at people every hour, you wonder who’s better than you. I prefer cats. Cats are psychologically independent, regardless of whether they are true or not, and the spirit that they hold to their equal status with the two-legged beasts is invaluable. I’m sorry.

The dog got it. “Wowling” whispered two voices to offend.

“Stand down. You’re a musical, polite dog. Don’t spoil the mood. You’re not like other dogs. I’m giving in.

The dog looked at me with a delicate look, and his chin was lying on a barewood table, humming at my tongue and licking my finger on the table.

“I said I don’t like dogs anymore. I know I’m dead, sleeping in the desert, and I can’t find it in the sand, and it’s just a dream to turn into oil in 10,000 years. Anyway, why did you run into my dream and you die? I’m sorry.

The dog flipped a big white eye at me and opened his mouth and said, “Beware, no one dies! I’m sorry.

The sky is blue and calm as a precursor to a catastrophe. I opened my eyes to the bitterest of pain, and saw him, half of him before me — the big dog in my dream.

“Jianjima. “I flew 7,400 kilometres, day and night. I’m a very good person to dig a girl out of the sand with a self-absorbed, emotional. He raised his hands and showed me his dirty hands.

I’d like to ask him who he is, and I’ll just squeeze out some hum. It’s the first time in my life that my tongue is so dry that it doesn’t sound.

He touched the colored graft bag that I’d always hang on my shoulder for half a second, took the ash out of the bag, pulled the zipper out of the bag and took out a bottle of mineral water that was almost half a month old, and wringed the cap and handed it to me.

Here, drink.

I put a whole bottle of mineral water over my head and poured it down. A bottle of water has been poured out and a bottle has been broken and poured.

“Looks like I’m just in time. I saved your life. Do you have something to say to me? I’m sorry.

I washed my mouth twice, spitting out a sticky patch of sand and water, and finally squeezed a sentence out of my throat: “Who the hell are you?” Who told you to mind your own business? I’m sorry.

“It’s only when you’re out there that you can see how elegant Chinese is. “He laughs.

“Do we know each other? I looked at him, and I couldn’t say why, and I looked at him, and I woke up in a strange way.

“You know each other, between you and you.” “I’ll forget, at least say thank you.” Thanks to this little thing, I found you. He smiled and knocked with his hand on my Mandrake on the T-shirt.

“You’re Seo Yong? Put a tracker in my bag and put a name on it. I’m sorry.

“Happiness. I bought it for my family’s laptop, and suddenly it was used as a business card. I’m sorry.

He took two steps back and gave me room. I’m getting a lot better at this point.

He was wearing a red hooded sub-machine coat, with a tumbled face, a silly black big box glasses, and a large ink green optic lens outside the thick periscope.

And he turned the luminous clips of ashes up, and showed his eyes groaning down.

I don’t want to admit that I know him. How can I know him, but I still have an impression on his face, and it’s just a shock to my chin.

13th flash, West Annan Gate SKP luxury store.

He was the man at the store.

Eleven.

According to Mr. Good Pervert Stalker himself, he received the first warning at around 3 p.m. the day before yesterday. According to him, the anti-fouling device contained a procedure that he himself had rewrited. Once the anti-fouling device appears in an area not suitable for humans and the coordinates are not moved in 30 minutes, the alarm is automatically sent to the owner — that is, to him.

He’s 87% sure that I’m either in trouble in the desert or asking for trouble. In any case, I need to be helped, and he needs me alive, for reasons not clearly stated. He judged that it was time to appear before me, to explain all this to me, and to buy the most recent plane ticket and fly over.

The day before yesterday, at 6 p.m., Mr. Pervert Stalker, who was on board at Siam Airport, flew for 2 hours and 25 minutes to Shanghai, Pudong. 2 hours and 50 minutes in the direction of the United Arab Emirates and 9 hours and 30 minutes. In the middle of Abu Dhabi International Airport at 5 hours and 20 minutes, a further three hours and 25 minutes, arrived yesterday at Ben Gurion International Airport in Israel at 5:30 p.m.

As soon as he got out of the airport, he rented a local car in Tel Aviv. Anyway, it’s a late season, renting a car for free and upgrading him into a red Mitsubishi SUV. He concluded that I lacked the will to survive, that I could not last in the desert for more than three days, and that the horses drove out of the city and drove themselves to me through the Negev desert.

Now, after two nights and one day, Mr. Pervert Stalker stands in front of me with a Swiss military knife in his left hand, and his right hand is empty. He’s imitating Murphy of the Hacking Empire. I’ll choose between left and right.

“I know you’re self-destructive. It’s been a year since you broke up with that little salesman. The first thing he said was that I wanted to go up and smash his glasses.

“I’ve been watching you in secret. I don’t want to break your self-inflicted little emotions, but you’re in the Arawa Desert, 34 kilometers south, and that’s Elate on the Red Sea, a beautiful little beach town. If you had the chance, you should have gone over there and heard there was the best beach café in the Red Sea. I’m sorry.

He took a breath to lighten the yawns he was about to strike: “If you really want to die, what are you waiting for? Why don’t you cut off your veins and end it? My judgment is that you don’t really want to die. You’re taking danger to stimulate yourself and to find a real sense of life. If you’ve had enough, you’ve had enough of these days and you want to change. Please be calm, serious and serious, as adults, and listen to my next offer. I’m sorry.

I don’t have to choose.

“Fuck you. I gave him a finger against the root.

“You have the power. He said, “The power, the unique, the infinite possibility. Nobody really understands, including you. Think about it. You can do great things with your abilities. No ordinary person has ever had such an opportunity. Let me ask you, in spite of the bad things that have happened, do you really think you are unfortunate compared to those who cannot be saved? I’m sorry.

I’ve been thinking about this day, and despite the attention I’ve been paying since the middle and late, my 57 flashes still leave too many unnatural traces around the world. Sooner or later, mysterious, insidious forces will notice my presence and find me.

Losing freedom and flashing it for them is the last thing I want to do.

This stalker reminds me that my brief life has been very confusing and irresponsible to myself and others. But at least at the end of the day I can do something strong and self-defeating to avoid endangering innocent people.

He saw through my thoughts and said, “Stop, don’t rush into something stupid. Your secret is safe.” My words and my actions are only personal. I don’t belong to any intelligence or secret organization. I came to you for personal purposes. I’m sorry.

“I believe in you with a hole in my head. You put a tracker on me, you spy on me, you track me, you know my background and abilities, and you dare to appear before me. You have the resources and the power to act, in any case, to wait. I’m sorry.

“I take that as a recognition of my work. He smiled, “I did it for a reason. If you want to come with me, I can explain it to you on the way back to Tel Aviv, and I have to return the car by 12 o’clock in the morning. I’m sorry.

“Thank you, no need. Everyone has a reason. I’ve heard enough of others in my life. I’m sorry.

“So that’s why you died in the desert on equal terms? You’re so depressed about your life?”

“Don’t play with me on the profile, stalky old man. Listen, whether or not your real name is Tsui Yin…

“My name is Seo Yong. I can show you my ID. I’m sorry.

“Don’t interrupt me, okay? I don’t care what your name is, I don’t care. We only met once, once, two years ago. I’ve forgotten your name long ago. Don’t act like we know each other. And don’t think you spent $600,000 flying from Xi’an to Te’s what?”

“Tel Aviv Ben Gurion International Airport. I’m sorry.

Jesus Christ! Don’t think you’ll fool me if you fly on a long-distance flight and pull me out of the sand. What do you expect to see? I’m moved by a nose and a tear, listening to your current story, and paying for your salvation. Sorry, no. I’m sorry, but we have to put this ugly thing in front of you in case you have unrealistic expectations. That’s what I am. I’m sorry.

“I understand. He said, “You have the ability, your personal experience, to trust the outside world and not to deal with others. I’m sorry.

And I made him cough up, and I said, “Don’t make us familiar.” I’m sorry.

“We’re not friends. I’m sorry.

“That’s right. I’m sorry.

“But we can be partners. I’m sorry.

“Huh? Are you listening to me?

“Please, let me finish my sentence for flying all night and driving all night to find you. This is the third time he’s interrupted me, but I can’t get mad. Because of the sad look that came out of him, and behold, in my heart.

“There’s someone very important to me, she’s very sick, and she’s running out of time. And your ability is the only way I can think of saving her. I implore you that we join in one thing. I have a target, you have skills, you and me. I won’t lie to you. It’s risky, it’s profitable, it’s moral. If you fail, you die. If you succeed, you can save more than one life, and I can give you the best thing in the world in return. I’m sorry.

“What is it? I’m sorry.

“A chance to use the power to achieve self-worth. You’re on the road, you’re exiled, you’re looking for the opportunity. I’m sorry.

And We looked at him hard, as if the pines were opening their third eye. Faced with my eyes, he nodded to me in a sincere and serious place, full of expectations.

Damn it, I scolded in my heart. Isn’t this the same as two years ago? What’s wrong with him? And with His mercy and alms, he appeared again and again in my most insolent hour, and shattering my pace and ruining my mood and plans.

“You’re good. I believe you’re serious. There is a man you care about, you’re willing to do anything stupid for her, even if you die. But I can’t help you. Good luck. I’m sorry.

“Wait, you don’t understand…”

“Sorry. “I flew to take the Swiss military knife from his left hand and pointed it at my heart.

And I said, “It is you who do not understand, and you can come to the door and prove that the heart that I want to die is right. Some things shouldn’t exist. I shouldn’t live. Think about it. I’ll die early. Don’t blame yourself, it’s not your fault, at least 87%, not your responsibility. I’m sorry.

He’s staring at me like a fool, and our position has turned upside down so I have the guts to get back at him.

“Are you serious? Wait, wait. Take it easy. Let’s talk first.

“I’m not waiting for you. I’m sorry.

The moment when the sharp edge of the knife fell into the skin, the white light flashed, and I fell.

12

I never told anyone my real name, much less my so-called ability, until I was knocked down by that destined little electric donkey.

I hate young people born in big cities, dressed up as cool by moaning without disease, who only waste and complain and wonder what to do all day and night. I know that I’m just a little girl of local origin with a psychotic mother behind me. Our family is surrounded by poverty, anxiety, greed, ignorance, poor location, bad fortune, asymmetric information. No one wants to hear stories that are too realistic and have no meaning.

When I was particularly busy, I wondered if those who saw me disappear at the scene felt like they saw superpowers and opened the door to a new world.

I’m sure the vast majority of them will see my instant disappearance as a magic trick, like an animated act. White flashes are a white phosphorus oxidation reaction, and disappearance takes advantage of human vision, space design loopholes. Suppose someone called the police, the police would have explained that to me that I was a con artist. We live under modern science. In the face of an isolated case of super-realism, the instinct is to rule out the right answer first.

As for the second time I was sold, all I could remember was fragments.

Mothers were prepared to get a drug from the trafficker who meted out to a stubborn target like me. She made me drink it in white, and soon I fell asleep in her eyes.

It’s like a ghost crushing the bed, looking at me with my eyes closed, but I’m conscious. I just can’t make a sound. I can’t move a finger. I can feel someone moving my body, lying in the back of a van that smelled of leather and gasoline and was bumping the road. There were other people in the car besides me and the driver, I couldn’t see my face, but the smell and the sound told me that there were men and women, more than one.

That time could be said to have been a long time, and I lost my sense of time and space, and I felt in the car, on the ship, on the horse, and in the air.

In the dark and lightless abyss, my limbs are rooting out, and my senses are as thin as the seeds of the plumes are scattered along the winds, covering the land and the sea, and gradually everywhere. I don’t know how long it’s been since I left home. A week? A month? It seems possible. One thing is clear: the men who transported me took me to several countries.

By the time I really woke up, I was in a hot area, and I was locked up with a dozen children of different colours who had no language. At first glance, I am the oldest and the most nutritious girl in the Ethnological Museum.

A little black-faced, dirty little boy staring at the big eyes of fear and saying, “Don’t lie down.” They’ll see you fall asleep and eat you from the feet. I’m sorry.

“Who are they?”

“The big, hungry rat! I’m sorry.

I finally met someone who could practice English in person. The other kids won’t come near us. I saw three toes missing from the flat feet of the little boy, one of which just grew a pink lumber, and the white bones were invisible and could not be helped.

Allowing my mother to sell me, and not to resist, to take this as a reward for her and as a price for breaking ties with her, is the most foolish decision of my life. There’s no big deal to pay for it in a self-harming way. Lover loves himself first. Those who are young and young have to pay a terrible price to understand these arguments.

I looked around this crowded, dirty prison and I laughed. By contrast, the time they were sold in the human market, not even the warm-up exercise. The first time was like a haunted house in a playground, and it scared you, but it didn’t really hurt you.

It’s never gonna come back.

13

Thailand has such a market culture.

For three days in Bangkok, I saw strange places running the market. From urban to peri-urban areas, traders occupy roads, mountains, beaches, rivers and even railways. They are large and small and they take a variety of forms. Tourists travel between Lin’s and Lin’s commodity stalls, and the strange smell is complex and hierarchical. There are shadows of the human being everywhere, and every few steps, you can hear a few plain words of Mandarin.

I got a second-hand job in a flea market in New Bangkok, where I’m paid better than nothing and better than a day end and no questions.

The owner’s name is Lee, who is from Jiangsu Salt City and who earns the first barrel of gold from a Chinese-related business in Old Bangkok Town Street. He then left behind his heart and set up a green, indoor café in the flea market garden.

All those working in the shop were students from the mainland, most of whom were domestic female tourists who came to take photos and take cards. The white-faced college girls are downloading the country’s most popular applications from Mr. Lee’s cell phone, asking me where I come from, and I say Chongqing Hak County, no doubt.

I’m talking to you.

Three days have passed.

The next morning he came as soon as he opened the door.

“I can’t believe you stabbed yourself in front of me! I can’t! “The perverted stalker of a servant came as soon as he saw me.

I threatened to shut him up with my blizzard eyes, and then I asked Mr. Li for half a day’s leave.

“You’re here? Welcome, take your classmates to any place and buy him a cup of coffee. I’m sorry.

I dragged him to sit down in a small garden, where he had a dead end, and threw a big cup of sign on the table. I moved rough, defamated, cold foam collapsed at three times faster.

“Did you drink ice early in the morning? He’s crooked.

Since I met him, I like to stare. I looked at him, with my arms, and sat across from him, and said, “Let’s not complain, drink.” I’m sorry.

“Let me ask you, did you know in advance when you took the knife and stabbed yourself, that that would stimulate the ability to act?” I’m sorry.

I stare at him and don’t talk, let him guess.

“You have absolutely no idea, I suppose. You’re lucky. I’m sorry.

Turning out the luminous clips, I saw his thick black eyes. He looks like he needs a cup of coffee to wake up.

“I’m so jealous of those who can run around the world without flying through customs.” When he looked at me, he took a big sip of glass, and the bearded mouth left a round of milk-white foam, “The world hasn’t come out of the post-disease state, and it has to be stamped and stamped everywhere. I’ll throw up one more time to fill out the forms, the nightmare of international bureaucracy. I’m sorry.

“If you’re not more nutritious, I’ll go. I’m sorry.

“Wait a minute. He put the bottom glass back where he was, with his wet hands on his slightly swollen eyes, “You could have thrown the anti-spare away for so many days, you could’ve disposed of it, and I’d never find you again, but you didn’t.” I’m sorry.

I put my hands around my chest and looked at him, “What do you mean?” I’m sorry.

“You’re testing me to find you. It’s a test. I’m sorry.

“Why would I do that? I’m sorry.

“You’re actually interested in my proposal. You don’t know me, you don’t know what I’m saying. So you’re gonna leave the anti-fouler around and see if I can find it. You want to see how serious I am and how far I can go. I’m sorry.

He looks at me, I looks at him, and whoever blinks first loses.

“I didn’t say that before. I apologize for making you uncomfortable. I’m a fool. Give me another chance. I’m not in pity or charity, I really need you. You have great powers. Help me. I won’t let you down. * And he shined his innocent eyes and looked at me. *

“Well, that’s not stupid. You’re pretty good at it. I’m sorry.

Let him guess, I do have some kind of expectation. Now it’s time to soften your attitude, since you can’t fool him.

I pulled the Mandrake anti-spare out of my jeans and put it next to the glass: “As I finally had the courage to do it, I lost. I can’t die. I’ve got nowhere to go. I think if that pervert stalker shows up again, he’ll have a chance to hear what he can say. I’m sorry.

“Hey, the first time we met, I mean, I must have made a very bad first impression on you in Sian. * He’s sarcasming with his oily face *

“I don’t remember you at all. And, wipe your mouth. I’m sorry.

He smiled with his eyes open, his left hand rubbed his mouth, and he reached out to me through the table with his right hand: “Stop calling me a pervert stalker, and I have a name, Seo Yong.” I’m sorry.

We shook his hand with a loathsome look: “My name is Gang Island.” Now, what do you want me to do for you? I’m sorry.

In New Bangkok’s mixed second-hand flea market, I lifted up his arms and felt that he had not had much muscles on his arms that would have been so tight that he wouldn’t have gone.

Relax. “I blinked and held him in the colourful crowd.”

“You’re so hard to understand. He looks to his left and his right.

“I guess you’ve always been single. You’ve never been in love. I’m sorry.

“Ha-ha. And he smiled, and he turned his back, and he said, “I can’t believe it. I’m sorry.

“It’s okay. Who doesn’t like simple big boys? I like it more than you do in your sunglasses. “I can’t walk before the snack stand. Slap him on the shoulder.” “Dear, it’s all yours. I’m sorry.

I picked up a roasted pork that I forgot to buy. He took a look at me and lifted up his cell phone and cleaned it up.

In the direction of the Gulf of Thailand, there was a thunderstorm, a cloudy sky and a storm approaching.

“There’s always rain here. It’s okay. I said, “Look at them, a bunch of inexperienced tourists, like quail that fell into the oil pot? Fly your ass back to the hotel and expose everything. You’re coming in with me. There’s a lot of water. I’m sorry.

We went into a fish-smelling aquarium market and stood in front of the face bowl of the blue lobster and pretended to see the price plate.

“So you’ve come a long way in two years and seen the world. He has nothing to say.

I bit him with a soft-painted toothpick, and he shook his head.

“Is it good?”

“And dry and woody. I’m sorry.

“The chili sauce next to it will probably taste better.” I’m sorry.

“Thank you for your hospitality. Don’t be surprised. I’ll have to eat a few more while I can eat. God knows there’ll be food later. I swallowed the roast pork and said, “I was driven away by a force I didn’t know, and I was running around, not the kind of world travel that usually means. I’m sorry.

“However, you have seen the wider heavens and the earth, and I can see it in your eyes.” Most of them, including me, spend their whole lives in a few big cities, dying of old disease and dying, and they can’t walk 50 kilometers. You’re so different from us ordinary people. I’m sorry.

Something stings me in his mouth. I held him up and forced him to turn his toes against my eyes: “Mr. Ordinary, I’m interested in what you see in my eyes.” I’m sorry.

He looked at me and looked down, and then he moved away, “I saw life and death in your eyes.” This way, you’ve seen a lot of things that ordinary people can’t see, and more than one person dies in front of you. I’m sorry.

“Fine, at least you’re not lying. There’s a way to see people. I’m sorry.

“I have seen wonderful things in your eyes. There’s a lot of good and ugly. I’ve never seen anyone like you. I’m sorry.

“So divided?

“No, it’s just a beautiful break. One step forward or later could be the abyss, where you stand on the only visible balance and remain relatively static in the flood surge. Then he whispered, “I can feel your confusion just looking at you. I’m sorry.

All of a sudden, I don’t want to try him again.

“Tell me about her, the girl you’re willing to give anything for. I’m sorry.

“Does it have to?” He has some resistance, not to hide, but to be embarrassed before me.

“I haven’t decided yet whether to help you, but only promised to listen. I don’t know enough about you for people and your purposes. I’m sorry.

He nodded to understand.

Her name was Zhou Zhou Zhou, and this year I was going to study and work at a convenience store in front of my neighborhood. I’m sorry.

“711? Family? Or Rosen? I like to go to a convenience store to buy a string of foods with the steel jars made by flowers. I’m sorry.

He’s got a funny look on his face: “Well, hey, it’s Tang Jiu. I’m sorry.

I whistled: “This mysterious “she” is a Tang Jiu sister. I’m sorry.

“Do you have to give everyone a nickname? He looked at me with displeasure and apparently offended the girl he admired.

“So, you put a wire in Tong Jiu’s underwear? Or did she have a camera right across her window to watch her go through the window at night? I’m sorry.

“I really didn’t make a good impression on you, did I? He was strangled by me seven inches and lost his temper. “I’m not who you think I am, I’m serious, I’ve never done anything like that before. If you don’t believe me, I’ve come all the way to you. This is my first trip abroad. I didn’t even have a passport, I didn’t have a plane. I’m sorry.

“Well, absolutely. I’m sorry.

“I got technical guidance to track you down. It’s part of the deal. You have to join the deal. I’m sorry.

“I don’t understand you. I’m sorry.

“It’s complicated, let’s step by step. I swear to God, there’s nothing to hide. I’m sorry.

“All right, let’s start with basic information. What is your relationship with Tong Jiu? You have a crush on her?”

“We’re just strangers who can name us. The convenience store is in front of the house, and sometimes I go in and buy fast food. He’s a friend. I’m sorry.

“And then there was a turning point?”

He took a deep breath: “About six months ago, at the most painful and desperate time of my life, the cause of the family is not to ask what happened. She saw me sitting alone in the rain and crying while smoking, and she came out of the store, and she shoved me in my hand with a tanned twig. She said she couldn’t pretend she didn’t see me, she gave me sugar, she didn’t have trouble, she got better. I’m sorry.

“Take the sugar and then you two go to bed? I’m sorry.

“What? No, no, absolutely not.

“That’s it?”

“That’s enough. “I have no family, no one else.” She was the only one who showed concern for me when he left you at the bottom of the valley. Even a little bit of goodwill would be enough to pull a lonely man from the abyss without hope. You know how I feel, right? I’m sorry.

“Let’s just say, go on. I’m sorry.

“The candy she gave me, to be gentle, saved my life. I understand that it is the goodwill of strangers, and this is the time. In large cities, people are indifference, alienation and lack of interest in others, and the more they fear trouble among acquaintances. When I learned that her heart failure was at an advanced stage and that her family regarded her as a burden, I thought there was something I could do. I’m sorry.

“Maybe she saw you as a fool, deliberately touching you with a little favor. I’m sorry.

“Absolutely, when the springs report, it should be. And you’re wrong. I’m sorry.

“What’s wrong?”

“The vast majority of people are ordinary people, and their lives are full of nothing, and that’s just a few seconds. It is wrong to expect that one can demonstrate and prove his or her character only through a dramatic event. From those tiny little details, good and evil are as real as evil. No, it’s more real. An eye, an action, a conscious choice of words, words out of mouth. Because it’s small, it’s worth it. I’m sorry.

I couldn’t help but laugh, “Wait, tell me the truth, have you rehearsed this before?” I’m sorry.

“Yes. I’m sorry.

“Let me get this straight. Do you want me to believe that you gave a sugar to you when your heart broke and that she flew over 10,000 kilometres to find another stranger in a strange country — that is, me? I’m sorry.

“This is it. “He is not ashamed of himself.”

“What’s in it for me if I help you? I’m sorry.

“I can immediately call you $100,000 as an advance. I’ll call you when the operation succeeds. If it fails, you don’t have any more money, but you keep the advance. This is the only chance. What do you say? I think the conditions are good for you. I’m sorry.

“I admit it sounds tempting. “No, I don’t understand. Is there a mine in your house or something? Where do you come from? Don’t you have to go to work or go to school? I’m sorry. How old are you?”

“Twenty years old. And he said, “We’re about the same age, and I put these on from my little glasses, and everybody says I look older. Don’t worry about the source of the money. I sold a house. I’m sorry.

“You, you…” I don’t know what to say after hearing it. “That’s true. You don’t care about things, but people are willing to give their lives for them. Do you know that people from a small place like me have to spend a lifetime in a big city? I’m sorry.

“Sian counts the big city.” I’m sorry.

“It’s a comparison! I’m sorry.

“My grandparents and grandmothers worked their whole lives to keep their homes in the city. Then there was my parents, and there was me. I’m sorry.

“You mean, my family’s too lazy to be in town too late? I’m sorry.

“No, I’m saying the operation needs cash. I need money. Why are you always so angry? I’m sorry.

“I don’t have a drum!”

“Look at your face. I’m sorry.

“You! I’m sorry.

“Well, well,” he appeased me with a gesture, “my parents are gone anyway. Waste is also a crime as long as the old house is empty. Don’t choke. I’ll get you a juice. I’m sorry.

“You’re such an idiot…” I tried to call him an idiot and a loser, but I looked down and I saw a colored tweak on my shoulder, and I said, “You’re an honest man. I’m sorry.

“I know how stupid my behavior seems to be. That’s how I see it. The world is so big, so complicated. Can’t all be smart? There’s a couple of stupid people like me who do things that people don’t want to do and don’t want to do. I believe I am doing the right thing, and I will not regret it. I’m sorry.

“Just, whatever you like, it’s none of my business. I’m sorry.

After a moment of silence, I thought of a thing that had been bothering me for many years, and then I looked up and said, “Well, how did this end?” I’m sorry.

“In the year?”

“Just two years ago in Sian. I’m sorry.

“Didn’t you forget? I’m sorry.

“Come on, people ask you, just answer.” I’m sorry.

“In that year, let me think. “When you disappeared, the boss told me to take something and get the fuck out of here.” Not only did you not get the month’s salary, but you had to pay back the cashbag you stole. I’m sorry.

“Okay. I laughed twice, and I ended up like I thought, “Don’t say anymore, I’m in. I’m sorry.

“Really? * His eyes were brightened in the second *

“I don’t like to owe idiots. I’m sorry.

14

I said we were locked up in “sea view five-star hotel” and I knew that my Chinese accent was heavy, but Seven understood the joke, and a little bone squeaked and twisted.

In a few days, I’ve liked this optimistic, strong little boy.

I called him Seven because he only had seven toes. He wouldn’t mind saying that he was eaten off three toes by rats while sleeping. He was the first person I saw when I opened my eyes, and I was friends with him these days, and it was normal for friends to come close to each other.

I told him to “see qbe” and I told him to “see qbe.” He was my first foreign friend in my life.

Seven smiles passed and calmed down to me. He had clear blue eyes, and in the sun I looked at his eyes and feared that I would fall into it. He has a smooth, dark skin, a soft curly hair, a small head, and a lovely five-man. I complimented him for having the world’s most beautiful big eyes, as if he was scratching him, and he laughed again.

“The eyes. He corrected it in English, “not ass.” I’m sorry.

I do not know exactly where we are in the tropics, which hemisphere, which continent and which country we know that we are being held by an international human trafficking organization. Ask Seven, he has an incomprehensible concept of geography in his head. He said that he lived at sea with his grandfather, who remembered the last storm, who put him in the only life-saver ring, and he sunk with “Kandru ” . I asked him if Kandru was the name of the fishing boat, and he gave me his name and said it was Sea Island.

“It’s water. One time he said, “There’s medicine in the water, you drink it, you’ll say it’s a lie. “We’ve been talking all day, and I finally understand that he’s from Sri Lanka, not from India.

Our communication is limited to the amount of vocabulary we know each other, and more often we have to supplement the subtle meaning of language with eyes, faces and gestures.

And I asked him where he had learned English, and he spoke a great deal in a native language that I could neither follow nor understand, which was for him the mother tongue. He saw me goofy, and he was unhappy to change back to English and told me it was Grandpa who taught him. I asked him how old he was this year, and I looked at him with a little bone and guessed he was eight or nine years old. He said he was almost 14 years old. Well, severe malnutrition, it surprised me.

In a way, me and him are the alternative to this 10 square metre concrete cage.

There was only one iron door open out of the square room, which was locked back and a small, tall and round skylight. There are other children in the corner, both boys and girls, with a maximum of 10.

A long, long chain went around the corner of the wall, nailed to the concrete floor, looked down in the air, and cuffed all of us to one ankle. On the chain, only a few centimetres of active space are left. The children were strangling in the gruesome dark corner, holding their hands tight, fearing the light, and shaking from the shadows only their dirty bare feet.

It would be useless to call on all of us to stand together and rise up against each other. Not to mention the difference in ethnicity and the incoherence of language, most of the children are like little pets who have just undergone sterilization, who have been using too much anaesthetics, and have been sorely in their minds.

Bad water. “Some people came before us and drank too much bad water.” I’m sorry.

Sometimes by night, the room is reduced or added to a few people by no means knowing where the missing children are taken. I assume that human traffickers are sending anaesthesia gas through the vents. With the iron door at 12 o’clock, they’re increasing their numbers in a clockwise direction, and in a few days it’s my turn at 10 o’clock and seven.

I couldn’t talk to anyone except Seven. It’s not because seven young people speak English, it’s because no one else wants to talk to me.

At first, I thought they were ostracizing the Seven, disabling the Seven or something. After one night, I found out that I was not the one who was excluded.

“Everyone fears you. “You didn’t have a heartbeat when you first arrived. I’m sorry.

No heartbeat? I don’t know what he means. How can a living man not have a heartbeat? I asked him why he was not afraid of me, and he laughed shyly.

“You look like a man, like my sister. * He closed his eyes on me.

15

Seagulls fly and dance like a storm of shredded paper, blocking our way and our way back.

I had a daydream on the passenger ship Horizon across the Bay of Bengal, leaning on the port-side rail. A naked boy walks barefoot by a river full of abandoned needles, bends over and picks and picks, looking for garbage that can sell. A full-blown, dark-red moon came out, and the filthy moonlight shined on the boy’s face, and he grew a little seven-faced face, and said to me, “Well, after all, a few people really get deer and dream about fish.” I’m sorry.

Seo Yong beat me on the shoulder from the side.

“Sorry, what did you say? I lost my mind. I’m sorry.

“Tokishima, are you okay? It feels like you’ve been restless since we left Bangkok. I’m sorry.

“Don’t mind me. Go on. I’m sorry.

He nods his head: “Feed transplant.” I’m sorry.

And he said, “Scientists use mini pig as a biological carrier to plant human stem cells and produce human organs. I’m sorry.

“This is the source? A human living heart from a pig? Like a ginseng tree? I’m sorry.

“Yes, as I told you, this process bypassed the intervention of the Ethics Committee and stood up morally without harming anyone. The best thing is, it’s going to be a perfect heart in all its aspects. I’m sorry.

“Yes.” I heard that I just wanted to shake my head.

“You know, Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhou Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu Zhu is in the final stages of heart failure We don’t have time to wait for the system to match the source, and the right heart provider does not just wait. Cardiac transplants require a high match, and the closer age, weight, blood type, sex, the closer the supply and receptor, the higher the probability of success and the longer the receptor survives after surgery. I’m sorry.

“A heart for a heart. I’m sorry.

“You can say so.”

“In order to keep her alive longer and better after the surgery, you need a tailored heart, a healthy heart carved out of a receptor’s heart. I’m sorry.

“Yes! Those who received a heart transplant had difficulty in surviving to a normal life, mainly a lifetime outburst, with the longest record being 38 years. So you understand why I keep stressing that this heart is perfect. I’m sorry.

“Do you swear that this process will not hurt anyone? Except poor pigs. I’m sorry.

“I swear on my life. I’m sorry.

He is, without looking back, a sincere, focused face, like a dog waiting for the master to scratch his chin.

I held my fingers and my elbows on the rails, and I lamented: “Not that I’ve suspected you, and I’ve been with you for a few days, I’ve fully understood that you’re an idiot, but I’ve always felt that it can’t be that simple. I’m sorry.

“You think too much. It’s not too complicated to spend money when it’s done. He’s so optimistic and stupid.

“Maybe, I hope so. Just in case I was there, it’s kind of an insurance policy. I’m sorry.

“We already know that you have a self-protection mechanism, and I’ll take you in my arms and stick you with something with a pointy head, and leave the rest to you. I’m sorry.

I turned around and looked at him, “Yo, have you learned to speak with one another?” Tell me about the guy who’s the source while the boat’s still out. I’m sorry.

“Danny Moon-Sick. I’m sorry.

“How could anyone name such a strange name? I’m sorry.

“Twenty-nine of these are aliases. He shrugged.

“What do you know about Danny? I’m sorry.

“Just as much as ordinary people know Audrey Hepburn. He said, “It’s written in encyclopedia. If you play deep webs, you’ll hear the name. He’s too famous. I’m sorry.

“I didn’t know he existed until you told me about him. I’m sorry.

“But he knew you! He gave me the coordinates, asked me to meet you there, to bring you in. If you don’t nod, the deal doesn’t work. I’m sorry.

“If you’re not lying. I’m sorry.

“I’m not lying!”

“So it makes me uncomfortable. I’m sorry.

“I agree. He said, “But he’s a powerful man, and he’s bound to catch anyone who talks about you and your stories online, even once, or encrypted information.” For him, finding you is just a matter of time. As they say, the Internet has memories. And you, Ejima-san, have been here for years. He’s interested in you. That’s our advantage. I’m sorry.

“I still don’t understand. Who is he?” I’m sorry.

“Danny Moon-Sick, also known as Dr. Flower Moon.” In an in-depth report from the Polar Team, the translation robot mistranslated the rare dual name “Moon-Thick” into “The Flower Moon.” Sometimes it’s a joke, the wrong translation goes against lang, and the Dr. Hanaki himself says yes and others are wrong, and that’s what he keeps calling it. Anyway, he’s the one who can get you anything, if you can get his interest and pay the price he asked you. I’m sorry.

“Cost”?

“The flower doctor believes in the principle of equal value. He gave you what you wanted and then took something from you that he thought was equal. In his words, this is to avoid entropy. A pound of meat, Antonio, not much, not much. I’m sorry.

“Sounds like a liar. Or euphemism, post-modern behavior artist. I’m sorry.

“The point is, he’s real. He’s not real. I’m sorry.

“I don’t believe in such people. I’m sorry.

“You didn’t know what he could say. On one occasion, the florist doctor transported 100 main battle tanks overnight across the Mozambique Strait, taking back power from the Prime Minister for the prince in distress. Until today, no one can tell how he did it. Three times on the cover of the Times, he was hailed as the most famous stateless hacker of the century. He is said to be everywhere and everywhere. Nobody knows who he really is, whether he’s a man or a group of people, even if he’s not human. He built a digital everything house in the world’s largest deep-net market, the Sand Tower, to receive letters from the world and to pick up a few lucky people to answer. Everyone knows that, as long as the doctor of the flower moon takes over from you, all wishes can be fulfilled, no matter how unconscionable and incredible. I’m sorry.

On the beach where the Chittagong Hill Tracts’ heads are strewn, hundreds of eyes cast curious eyes over here. We won the storm, and as soon as I got off the boat, I realized that there were not always Chinese tourists there, and that our looks and clothes were very visible in Bangladesh.

That’s not good. Just a week and a half from my last flash, the body and psychological stress is about to turn into a ripe fruit. I’m sensitive and fragile at this point in my life and I don’t want to look at strangers. A little external stimulus can cause a chain reaction that makes me public. And we’re in the hottest weather in July, when we cross the railroad through a South Asian country with 200 million people, no matter where we go. To be honest, I see little hope for success.

Tsui Yin took a pair of male sunglasses from his bag, without asking me what to say, and put them on for me as soon as I can.

“Trust me,” he said, “I was in middle school with bad skin for a while, and I was particularly concerned about other people’s eyes. Empirically, you’ll feel comfortable wearing your glasses as a cover. I’m sorry.

“You used to be a face? I’m sorry.

“That’s not the point. I’m sorry.

“Thanks. I’m sorry.

“I know you can’t take the heat, and I don’t want to fly thousands of miles again and start over again. I’m sorry.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s not that far. I’m sorry.

He’s groping the ink in his pants, and he’s givin’ it in his glasses. “I see a stand over there. I’ll get you a cup of milk tea. You stand still, relax, find something to do, check if the anti-fouler’s in your pocket, and distract. I’m sorry.

I couldn’t get him to stop playing “The Back” and he ran away.

Hello!

A local boy whose skin was dark and bright passed by and waved to me.

I consciously replied to him, “Hello.”

“That’s great. You’re Chinese. I’m sorry.

He was wearing a blue flower T-shirt, with sunglasses on his collar, with a pair of shoulderbags and a single back camera in his hand, and he approached me: “Please forgive me for my impudence, I worked with the Chinese boss in the factory for 10 years, and it was very nice to hear you just now. What do you say? I’m sorry.

I compliment him on the fact that Chinese is very fluent and well-known, not a compliment, but a genuine one. He can see it. He smiles in pink teeth.

“Radio was my dream from childhood to age. “I recently quit my job and came to the beach to photograph tourists for money.” Not much, but a happy and full day. I’m sorry.

“That’s great. I don’t want to be rude, look as quietly as I can, look far away, and look forward to Seo Yong coming back.

The young man expressed his willingness to take pictures of me for free, because I’m pretty, and it’s an honor.

“You’re very kind. I’m not that pretty. No, thank you. I’m sorry.

“Don’t worry, I’m very good at taking pictures. Let me try. It won’t make you ugly. I’m sorry.

“I really don’t need it. I don’t think it’s good.”

The sound of the gates keeps ringing. The locals passed by and looked at us — mostly me. I know I’m blushing.

Suh-Yun came all the way around me with a small cup of tea and milk, and came back in a hurry. He helped me block the camera with his body.

“It’s okay. When I see his face, I feel safe.

“This area looks like a view area, and a cup of milk and tea costs $30. He said, “You can’t throw it out when you’ve had a cup. I’m sorry.

“You’re lovers, right? Travel abroad? The young man put down the camera and laughed at us.

I don’t know how to answer it, just go see Seo Yong. He didn’t mean it. He said yes.

“I’m glad you’re in our country. I hope you have fun. I’m sorry.

“Thank you. I’m sorry.

“No, I’m serious. “We are many, but most are kind.” When you have difficulties on the way, don’t be afraid, just ask, and someone will help. I’m sorry.

“I see. Thank you for being so kind. I’m sorry.

Seo Yun shook his hand and changed his face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

He was careful to spread out the palm of the hand that he was holding, and a 0.45-calibre empty shell shell came out and a few pieces of unknown ash fell out of it. He dialed it with an edible finger, and there was a small, unburned bone in the ash.

“It’s a warning. We’re being watched. He put empty shells filled with ashes in his hand and looked around.

The young man disappeared early in the world.

16

A quarter to zero. At the station, I jumped off the bus.

Yesterday I was 600 kilometers from Wuhan’s Lake Tai, and that was my 20th flash. I feel like I’m holding on to a strange exotic love. The same goes for the 16th to 19th flashes, when I left Wuhan with my first foot and then I rushed to find a means of transportation to Wuhan. I’ve been on my way back to Wuhan for months, dreaming my ass upside down.

I arrived at the Loft apartment door in the monsoon before the night was dark and the security door was not locked. She knows I’ll be back tonight.

I can see that, on several occasions, she was anxious to ask me why I came back a few days later, in a state of incompetence. I was talking to my mouth and I swallowed it. Perhaps she was afraid that once she spoke, she would have to touch on the substance of the question: what was the relationship between me and her?

She’s not on the first floor, that’s in the bedroom.

As usual, I pulled the fridge door, brought out a pickle of ice and climbed up the attic to find her. The bedroom is hidden at the end of the hall, and the door is half covered. No one’s gonna fix it.

She sat on a narrow marble window with two legs and a small toes raised to the point of a pyramid built on an empty jar. There were drones flying through the window, and the colours of the lateral flight were lit from the left to the right, and the lines of her stinging were then silenced.

She was very drunk and saw me come home, and she slipped her ass off the window and she was lying on my lap, saying, “What are we going to do about this island?” I’m sorry.

I looked at her, and I didn’t know why I insisted on coming back. Perhaps it is because I told her nothing but name that I cannot just give up the resistance and let that force tear us apart and make it seem like I did nothing else. This is the normal life I long for, finding a reason to take root somewhere, to do a permanent job, to stop vagrancy; to have a home, a man waiting for me to come home.

She opened another bottle of wine, took a little sip and fell asleep on my lap.

She’s had a hard time too. Her grandmother, who had always understood and supported her, had been diagnosed with the late stage of small cell lung cancer. The doctors determined that the patient had only three to five months to survive, and that the freedom of movement in the former Yugoslavia had stalled. She had to significantly change a long-established series of plans to return to her family after working, to make limited reconciliation with her parents, and to be with her family to take care of her grandmother before her bed.

At 3:00 a.m. a day, to the hospital, to the apartment, to the mill. She was not suffocated on the road, at work and in hospital. The inspiration, the imagination and the passion all left her. She did not have the time and strength to paint, and the landmark piece of thought was left in the corner of the library, with dust on the tarp.

She and I are holding on and praying for the day when everything will be better. Time is our common enemy.

Time. My life has suddenly become a broken line, which averages only 14 days.

Human beings live in the world and, whatever they do, do what they want to do. Time is the basis for success. Even with a stray cat, it takes six months or even a year to make a baby-scared cat trust you and love you.

You spend four weeks in a new skill, three months making friends with a stranger, two years making a relationship bloom, seven years running a couple’s life, ten years fighting a personal career. And I only cut into a small fraction of 14 days of debris. 14 days for what? I am more familiar than the vast majority with the sense of despair that nothing can be achieved because of the lack of time. At the end of the day, perhaps only love begins without time or space. After all, we only fall in love for a moment.

The 38th flash, in Uttar Pradesh, India, I saw with my own eyes that the homeless, lying on the side of the road, were largely male. Some of them lie down and beg at us, some with one single eye and the other with a terrible hole in their eyes.

“It’s mucus, it’s the legacy of the infection. “A decade ago, during the pandemic, the oxygen-manufacturing machine used by the patients added unclean tap water and tens of thousands of people were infected in treatment.” First it’s a snout, and within three days it’ll spread to the eye, and then it’s the brain. Once at that stage, there was no cure but to remove the eyeball. I’m sorry.

The little sister is a medical student. We met in the old town of Agra. When she saw me, it was like she caught a straw and she was haunting me.

“You’re a traveler, too, right? She shook my hand and said, “Please, it’s safer for us girls to walk together. I suspect someone’s following me! I’m sorry.

Turns out she’s right.

I stopped a Tutu for her. It’s called a “jumper” in my hometown. The little sister told the beard driver to drive to the Taj Mahal and she booked a luxury room at the Tiredit Hotel. As soon as we sat on it, the local men, who behaved mysteriously, ran out of the shadows and ran away with their prey, scratching their cheeks and regretting.

“Demon! “The seven little ones looked round his big blue eyes.

If the demons had a human face, it must be the face of me and Seven right now.

The traffickers paid homage to the guest, who visited late at night, calling him “doctor” or a doctor. They opened the iron door from the outside and invited guests to enter the cage where we were being held and to check the quality of our “goods” at close range.

Here he comes.

The seven-year-old croaked a sad, short-sweet, holding me from the side.

That’s a creepy face. It’s not like he’s alive, it’s like a giant-looking swollen corpse. A white, full-headed skin-faced pig hanged upside down, with thick white powder on his fat face and a jump-up green, corrupt vein on the left side of his forehead. There is only a little eyebrow like a glare of ice, long and sharp. There’s only one left eye, the eye’s sharp, the right eye’s emptiness. We were staring at his mouth, two thick, sharp lips, black, purple lipstick like clowns. I couldn’t move my eyes away and feared that the next second the snake would come out of that mouth.

He’s looking at us, squeezing out a black smile. There were children who cried and there were screams.

“I want this.” He pointed at me and seven and said, “I feel my blood in my veins frozen.”

Two traffickers crouched down with their keys and unlocked the locks on my ankles.

“Just boys, no girls. He said:

I looked at Xiao seven and couldn’t say anything. We knew it was goodbye.

“No…no…”

Seven!

I was struck by the sound of the two traffickers who caught one leg and threw him on the ground. Then dragged him unconscious, like a pig awaiting slaughter, and took him away from my sight.

17

In Dhaka, Bangladesh’s capital, we know what people call it.

The population is generally conservative and few women travel on their own. No matter how hot it is, no girl left her limbs outside. Here, as a foreign tourist who stands still enough to make a difference, I decided to go into the country and wear long-sleeved pants all the way to avoid visibility.

Tsui Yin, who knew that I was sweaty, went to buy me a yellow turban for a local girl and told me to wrap it up.

And he grabbed the orchid, and said, “With a turban on, I fear your heat, and you see how beautiful this colour is.” “If it hadn’t been for the crowds, I would’ve turned his eyes.

This is a passionate, crowded and chaotic country. Some street buildings remind me of China in the 1990s.

We’ll sit down at a Burger King in the Rich. The air conditioners in the shop were cold and clear, in stark contrast to the road blocked by a tricycle outside the shop. By the time we order, the answer is 10 times as much as a roadside restaurant.

“What do you think of the island?

“Nothing. I’m sorry.

He came back with a plastic plate and sat across from me and pushed a bunch of fast foods towards me: “Eat something.” I’m sorry.

I don’t like his clearly worried face, but pretend to be cool. Especially when he called my name, it felt like my name was a sound-controlled bomb trigger.

“Eat it. I don’t have an appetite. You ordered it anyway. I’m sorry.

He stretches his neck and looks at the fries, ketchup, chocolate sundae, and understands something. I wish I had a cheeseburger. I don’t know if it’s for sale. I’m sorry.

“Sit down. Don’t waste your money. I’m sorry.

“It’s a rare opportunity to come and buy a taste of it. The King of Dhaka Burgers looks a little weird. I’m sorry.

After he left, I sighs. This guy’s gonna make people eat and drink, like he cares about people. It’s a big, non-smoking kid.

Fifteen minutes later, the big boy came back. Bringing back two expensive cheeseburgers and a stinking old man wearing a pilot’s sunglasses in broad daylight.

He’s like a hanging son of a bitch, he’s got a fat white labour gloves in his left hand, and he’s driving Seo Yong to the seat like a fly.

“Sit in. Don’t stare at me. Be natural! “Absolutely, in English.

Tsui Yin was like an accompanied daughter-in-law, holding two burgers, one not saying a word, slid into the couch and asked me for help with his eyes.

He sits beside him as if nothing happened.

“Just the two of you? “Uncle’s looking at us, switching to fluent English.

I exchanged sights with Seo Yao, and nod with consciousness.

“It’s a good bag, a good taste. “Absolutely, he stares at the colored pocket I hang on my chest and says,

“Uh, thanks.

“All right, it’s not my turn to pick. Let me introduce myself to you. I work for Dr. Moon. I’m your guide. If you want to see him, you have to listen to me. You heard the rules? When the action starts, I’ll tell you what to do. If I don’t talk, you don’t give a shit.”

“Absolutely understood. Suh Yong answered:

He turned around and looked at him and took off his right hand’s glove. Tsui Yin looked at it and thought he was shaking his hand and urgently handed it out. He frowned his head, avoided his hand, quickly removed a burger from his arms and said, “Thank you” in Cantonese, tearing out the wrapping paper “The Bar.”

A man’s hands were hanging in the air and he was embarrassed to pick up his head. I couldn’t stand to laugh.

The hawkers dragged the Sevens away, but he woke up.

And through the iron door, which was locked from the outside, We heard Xiao seven asking for help, cursed in his mother tongue, and kicked with his feet. His little bones, which were almost naked, squeaked on a hard, cold concrete floor. He’s so skinny, he’s famished, he’s hungry for so long, he’s got amazing power in him. The sound of the cries and the struggle keep me thinking of the return of the dead.

The devil is standing in the middle of 10 square meters of cages, blocking my way. The others are gone, leaving him alone. No one bothered to lock my ankle again. I stood up, facing the devil, and my arms were crawling with goose bumps.

I can’t imagine what he saw.

Every time he screamed, his voice was dazzled, and he turned away. Screaming echoes in the middle of a semi-open concrete maze, like a wave of distant and near waves of electric currents, flooding me. I was shaking madly, biting my tongue, and the smell of blood in my lips.

In the concrete cages, the children, whose minds were reduced to monkeys, beat themselves in one leg, pulled their chains, cried and laughed in the wake of the screams of the Seven. He called my name from a very far below: “Isa, Isa!” “It’s like I’m going to be sawing it vertically with a blunt saw, and it’s like I’m going to be all over the place.” Then there was a metal bang, and the sound of Xiao seven disappeared.

I’m full of hot hatred, my pulse is beating, my adrenaline is rising, I’m not afraid, I’m not rational. I looked at the man who started it, and I was going to jump up and kill him, and I bit his carotid artery with my teeth, and I stabbed him with my finger. He left his left eye and killed him in the cruelest way I could have thought of. And die together; I do not care about the consequences.

On top of his head, a small skylight, unstoppable, casts a pale moonlight. His head was floating in a hollow air full of dust and particles, like a moon with terminal disease.

And he came towards me, and smiled, and lifted up the white and luminous head, and lifted up the fat and broken face, as a white tumour solemnly rising in the stars.

He stood still, opened his hand and said to me…

“The island? I heard Seo Yun calling me, “You’re getting far away.” He’s worried.

And I stomped out of my dream, and I looked up, and I looked right in his wet eyes.

He had a silver plate with four Quadrilateral eggcakes in it and asked me if I would eat it, and I shook my head.

I was deterred by an unspeakable sense of loss, and I forgot something very important. I must remind him that it is now, or it is too late. But to my mouth, I fought a cold war, awakened, and the feeling of my dreams disappeared.

“I had something to tell you, but suddenly I can’t remember. I said:

“Are you obsessed with me? I’m sorry.

“Fuck off. I’m sorry.

He thought I had put the plate back on the table and laughed: “You should rest while there is time. I’m sorry.

“I’m not sleepy, I’m used to staying up late. You’d better get some sleep. I’m sorry.

At midnight, when he was so hot and damp, I was half a metre apart from him, standing on the balcony of the hotel, overlooking the evening view of Dhaka. I remember those soldiers with live ammunition who were seen in the streets during the day, and those who were displaced from the climate, the streets and the streets were flooded. He looked back at the room, where the air conditioner was broken and the wallpaper and sheets were crawling with mold. Close the window and imagine the air full of fungus spores that drive people crazy.

“Thank you for your concern. I’m fine. I’m not sleepy. * He held down the hand * * * with his mouth * * * * and * * * * and * * and * * * and * * and * * * and * * * and * * and * and * * and * * and * * and * * and * * and * * * and * and * * and * * and * * and * * * and * and * * and * * * and * and * * * and * and * * * and * * and * * and * and * * * * * and * and * * and * * and * and * and * * and * * and * and * * * and * * and * and * and * * * * and * and * and *

The night is moonless and the night sky is dark and heavily polluted. The wind is heavy, and the hotel is surrounded by an open-air dump where residents agree to be common. All-faced plastic bags were blown high by the wind, and the smell was too bad to let go and breathe.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to sit here and blow? I’m sorry.

A green plastic bag flew up against our face and I turned around and asked him. He opened his mouth to say something, and another red garbage bag flew over and he wrinkled his nose. The next second, we face each other’s faces, and we laugh at each other. He smiled on his back by the balcony guard, sat his ass on the floor and cried in his eyes.

A storm is coming. The dramatic changes are coming and the signs are everywhere.

“This floor is the safe house of the Shasa Tower, where the professional team packs up in the next room and makes final preparations. The lead man went to check the plane. When he says something, we’ll go. He says:

“It feels like the penultimate phase before the war. I’m sorry.

“This is a war. He took it seriously that “a hacker who is hostile to global capital, anyone close to him, could be involved in conflict and suffer collateral damage.” I’m sorry.

Suh Yong?

It’s my first time calling his name in a normal tone. His shoulder twitched slightly and perhaps guessed what I was going to say.

“Does she know that you’ve come so far to do these things for her? I’m sorry.

“She?”

“Your Lady Tangu. I’m sorry.

He was silent for a few seconds: “She thought I was still working at the supermarket, too busy to have time to visit her. She doesn’t know anything. If I go back alive, I’ll never tell her this. She’ll think she’s lucky, and at the last minute, she’ll match the right source through the system. I’m sorry.

“Why?”

“She didn’t beg me to do this. I asked for it. I did it too much. Only one person can be held responsible for such acts, and that is me. I’m sorry.

“Now it’s time to go back. I’m sorry.

“I have to go back with my heart.” I’m sorry.

“But is that fair? For yourself? If anything happens to you, no one will know what happened to you. I’m sorry.

And he looked at me, and he smiled, “You’re here, you’ll remember me.” I’m sorry.

“Is that unfair to me? I’m sorry.

“Don’t complain if you’re paid to work. I’m sorry.

“You! I’m sorry.

“Just kidding. I’m sorry.

Before I got mad, he squeezed at me with his smiling eyes.

“Tell me the truth. Why are you doing this? I’m sorry.

“Nothing why. I’m sorry.

“I don’t believe there’s a reason. I’m sorry.

“Well, if you have to say it, it’s about you. I’m sorry.

“I?”

“Yeah, because I met you two years ago. When I met you, I realized that what I thought was impossible did not really happen. I’m sorry.

“Sounds like a twist. I’m sorry.

“Remember when I said that people in the city are cold? I’m sorry.

“Of course. I’m sorry.

“I’m the kind of man who’s cold, so I like to wear glasses and avoid looking at others. It’s true. I’ve always been selfish, living in a little place. I’m not like my parents. I never understood their pattern. “But I can’t forget my whole life, when you disappeared in front of me in the store.” You make me feel like a good head. A voice said to me, “This is the chance you’ve been waiting for. Here it comes! Either you spend the rest of your life doing nothing, or you muster the courage to do something bold and see if it can change. I listened to that voice, so we were standing here. I’m sorry.

“Suh Yong…”

“I haven’t had a chance to say this, and I’m afraid it’s misleading. I appreciate it, Kajima. There’s a power in you. I’m not saying you’re gonna blink, I’m talking about the nature of you. You can change people, I’m a living example. You woke me up from my dream and let me know that nothing was impossible, so that I could be brave enough to help those who could not be helped. You made me better, and I thank you for that. So, how can I not go to the desert and dig you out with these hands? I’m sorry.

18

I, Seo Yon, 20 armed Sand Tower mercenaries, and our guidees, boarded a dark, grey-painted, large amphibious aircraft parked on the outskirts of the city.

“Veterans, professional killers, liars, ex-agents, hackers, fugitives, all the best you can get on the deep-net market are here. I’m not sure what I’m talking about.

An amphibious aircraft was opening its hatch in the direction of the city, and a rocket in an uplifting phase cut through the dirty, dark red sky. A few seconds later, a barrage of high-altitude bombs struck and exploded with a large group of teeth and claws.

“The war has begun. “The mercenaries wearing tactical vests and assault rifles came by our side and looked up.

“The daughter of Jiang Qing, meet again. The devil spread his hand.

“You, you are…”

“In different countries and languages, they gave me different names. I’ll always be Danny Moon-Sick to you. For you, I am a dreamer. I’m sorry.

He speaks with his lips wide open and his mouth flat and sound through his abdomen, unlike any known language, but I understand.

Dan…

“You can call me Dr. Flower Moon. I prefer this. I’m sorry.

His voice was like a smooth eels, crawling silently on my neck, swimming in my spine and slipping into my head. I’m feeling a micro-electricity, cold hair up and numb inside. Before him, I suddenly realized that I had no secrets, naked as a beast.

“Go away, get out of the way. I have the courage to resist.

“You shouldn’t say that to me. I’m sorry.

“You took the seven…”

“It wasn’t me who chose the boy. I’m sorry.

“Shut up! I’m sorry.

“It’s true. He said, “Someone bought the teenager based on their own needs. The criminals thought I was the buyer’s messenger, but I came here to follow up on a private deal, not for him. But I admit, I’m interested in him because of you. I’m sorry.

“What are they going to do about Seven?” I’m sorry.

He answered with a question: “Have you ever heard of a man, a pig?”

“I am…”

“They used to produce human organs in clean and sterile laboratories, using single-priced, time-consuming and well-bred mini pigs as biological carriers. Recently, they have gone to a failed country where there is no law. I’m sorry.

“Man hog…”

“Follow my voice, you can see it, right? I’m sorry.

I’m looking at images of rising sea levels, the spread of intercontinental fires, the fragmentation of glaciers, the melting of permafrost, the re-emergence of pestilence and endless fighting…

“Refugees. “Environmental, climate, epidemic, war refugees,” he says. Refugee children are perfect biological carriers, both economically and biologically. They have been born, with the connivance and encouragement of the developed countries, to give the money-governers an inexhaustible, non-dependable spare parts to help them live forever. Deliberate cutting, when spent, without attention, without protection, with huge profits and zero costs. Your little friend, unfortunately, has become a raw material in the vast industrial chain. You figured out what they’d do to him, didn’t you? I’m sorry.

“You’re a monster. I’m shaking, I’m losing control of myself. “I can still make it. Fuck off. I’ll get him. I’m sorry.

“A man can only wish once in his life, unfortunately. I’m sorry.

The devil mocked at a manner, and the iron door behind him opened. I ran away from him, broke the iron door, pulled my leg and ran away.

Cold laughter echoes in the concrete maze.

“Go ahead, do what you have to do and pay for it. I am Danny Moon-Sick, the dreamer, the debt seeker. You will forget this conversation until the day we meet again. I’m sorry.

At 1:13 a.m., a large amphibious aircraft hurried over the vast western Pacific Ocean.

After 30 minutes of take-off, the lead man took off his sunglasses and stood in front of the whiteboard and briefed the crew on the mission.

“Girls and babies, not for the first time. Cut the crap. You must know history. In the aftermath of World War II, United States troops took over many islands in the Western Pacific from the defeated Japanese and did not return them to their countries of origin. During the first cold war, United States forces built secret military installations on several of those islands, which were classified as highly confidential and erased from civilian maps. Historical literature and daily information were systematically tampered with, and ordinary people were unaware of the existence of the islands and could not find them on satellite maps. We’re flying to one of the islands that doesn’t exist, code WON41. I’m sorry.

“The land area of the main island is 6 square kilometres, with a maximum population of 200 people. In the 1950s, the United States military conducted several nuclear tests around WON41, permanently contaminating the local ecosystem. As our Eastern friends returned to their historical status, the United States gradually retreated and WON41 was abandoned. Theoretically, it is now a deserted island. Given the high rate of sea-level rise, the island will sink into the sea floor within five years. We’re done with the basics. Question? I’m sorry.

A Scarface mercenary raised his hand: “The enemy? I’m sorry.

“23 minutes ago, the news that Dr. Moon was hiding on a non-existent island in the western Pacific blew up the entire network. You’ve all been very close to the doctors, and you’ve all learned his personal charms. With a friend like Dr. Flower Moon, who needs an enemy? Just kidding. In addition to us, multiple emergency response units are on their way.

WON41. Strategic alliances of transnational corporations, multinational intelligence agencies, extremist organizations, terrorists, bounty hunters. The number of fingers, only late, not absent. So far no one has boarded the island, and we are fortunate to be ahead of everyone. I’m sorry.

Our mission?

“When escorting the two tourists to the island, they took over the old bunker of the United States Army here, set up a line of defence here and here, repel the enemy of the aggressor, and hold until Dr. Moon told me I could retreat. Problem? I’m sorry.

A pair of murderous and impatient eyes staring at me and Seo Yun. I don’t care. Tsui-Yo’s got a vibrator, a tweezer, and a tweezer.

“What about Dr. Flower Moon? I’m sorry.

“Friendly troops will support us from other directions, and whatever he does, we focus on the task ahead. I’m sorry.

A red-haired sister raised her hand: “The enemy’s equipment?” I’m sorry.

“light weapons, night vision, drones. There may be small quantities of heavy weapons, ship-borne and aerial fire support. I’m sorry.

“Probably? I’m sorry.

People listened straight to the mouth.

“What about nuclear testing, local radiation levels?” I’m sorry.

“not more than 500 microsevere. In and out, relatively safe. But I warn you not to eat of the palms of the land. I’m sorry.

“We came at a bad time, I’m sorry. Can the plane turn around? I think we should go another day. I’m sorry.

The mercenaries laughed at each other: “My little brother, you’re full of shit.” There’s no better time than this. If Dr. Flowers dies, this is your last chance. This is a chance for one person to live his or her life without saying it again. I’m sorry.

I stood in front of Seo Yong and raised my hand: “I want to know why. I’m sorry.

Everyone looked at me.

“Why do you mean?”

“What did Dr. Hanazuki do? I’m sorry.

“A bad thing? In the eyes of many, he is a genius, a hero, a saint! I’m sorry.

“A saint on one side may be a demon on the other. I’m sorry.

The lead man put back on his sunglasses, a smileless face: “Dr. Flower Moon was the initiator of this digital war, and the economic damage he had caused to transnational giants in one year alone amounted to hundreds of millions. The humanless Internet giants, the energy giants and the biological giants formed allies, all of which he had forced. Old-fashioned information wars, invasions and counter-invasions, intelligence wars, financial wars, public opinion wars between deep-net hackers and giants in a sovereign State with effective governance. In countries and regions with economic colonies and anarchy, there is little concern about who you are and where you live, and you are killed by air strikes. I’m sorry.

“What a mess. I’m sorry.

“This is the time. There is no clear enemy. The enemy is everywhere. Since the beginning of the new cold war, scientific and technological exchanges between East and West have almost stalled, and the flower doctor is a very few who can steal information from both sides. For the super-Power, and especially for the underworld, his brain is an invaluable treasure. I’m sorry.

“So they do?”

“Assure him, dismember him alive, leave only the brain, burn the rest to ashes, and spray the children’s urine outside the atmosphere. Don’t look at me, not me. That’s what a Western industrialist said after the stock price fell. I’m sorry.

“Then why are you working for Dr. Flower Moon? I’m sorry.

“To earn money, little sister, and to spend money with a flower doctor. Besides, we owe him everything, and we don’t have a choice. I’m sorry.

“What do I owe him?”

“Back,” the jump light turned green, and the radio in the cabin went off.

“Five minutes to destination. I’m sorry.

“Come on, come on, come on, come on. No? That’s good. Ready?

There was a massive earthquake in the tail of the plane, and a number of red lights flashed and the alarm sounded.

It’s hit! Repeat, the plane is hit! I’m sorry.

The plane broke up at 800 meters.

It’s been a long time, and it’s been a flash of red light and a bell. No one knows what’s going on in the cockpit, even the leadman himself.

He ordered us to check our parachutes, stand by and say we’re going to look. One second later, the sound of metal squeaked in the tail of the plane, and the flames that suddenly appeared in the sky would engulf the guidees. The next moment, amphibious aeroplaneization, which cut through the night sky, all began to fall free in his horrifying voice. I heard Seo Yun shouting my name in the back, but I couldn’t catch his hand.

We fell fast, and the flash didn’t start.

It must have been what they used to say about a near-death experience, a flashlight that brought you back to your brief, ridiculous life.

19

Following the departure of King Dhaka Hamburg, two men in white with suspicious marks followed the door. The guidees took us quietly into the alleys, seven and eight times between low-pressure small buildings, and lost their tails.

“The CIA recruited temporary workers locally,” he smiled at me and said, “Don’t you notice?” They’ve noticed you since Istanbul. I’m sorry.

Listening to him, I recall that on many occasions people of similar quality were met in war-torn countries. White shirts, bulletproof vests, sunglasses, nostrils, high toes on foot, followed by a small group of local officials, around and around, accompanied by large military escorts.

There’s only three of us left. The guide didn’t leave right away. He stood in the shadow of the sun and said, “What brought you here?” Is it worth it? I’m sorry.

“I won’t regret it. “I’ve got it all figured out.” I’m sorry.

The man who leads the way will always be that smileful face: “O life, little brother, is a series of regrets and surprises.” The time has come, and no one will regret it. I’m sorry.

The 50th flash, I landed on the south side of Mount Hindu Kush and on a hill outside Kabul. Four and a half weeks of rusty metal casings, which looked like a Sioux tank and infantry combat vehicle, had been dead for a long time, with all the iron skin and all that was left behind. There is an Afghan-flagged cemetery beneath the hillside. As far as the eyes are concerned, the surface is rugged and the mountains are full of pale mountains.

I do not care about international politics, but I know that the Americans left the country years ago. Twenty years of fighting left the Taliban devastated and re-emerged. The war is changing every day, and I don’t know who won or care.

At the foot of the hill there was a small village, where I went to look for people who spoke Chinese or English and where nothing had happened, I was stopped at the entrance by local militiamen pointing their guns at them as if they were enemies.

I raised my hand and after a match, they took me across the bridge to see the village chief.

It’s near dusk, and the light inside is bad. The village chief in a man’s clothes turned around, and I was surprised and thought I was looking at her.

This situation does not allow for imprudentness. I’ve been busy explaining my intentions to the mayor so that I can read Chinese. After they had verified my identity and determined that I was not a spy and that there was no threat, they finally stopped pointing their guns at me.

“A Chinese girl, what are you doing here? It was just me and the village chief, she asked.

I said I was a backpacker and did not believe what the Western media described as Afghanistan and wanted to see it for myself.

She couldn’t understand.

Chinese engineers were helping to build a road outside Kabul and she was about to send me to the construction site. Before she split up, she said to me, “The English come and go, then the Soviets, the Americans, now you. I’m sorry.

“The Chinese are not like them. I said, “We don’t destroy, we build. I’m sorry.

“You are the new superpower of the century.” Chinese are smart, long-sighted and self-restraint. A willingness to achieve its purpose by soft means without the use of force. You are an island of the Continent, but you will not look after the outside world if conditions permit, and you can do your own business in closed doors. You have always been at the world level. You can destroy the enemy with your will. You’re not us. I’m sorry.

Sounds like she has some understanding of China and some misunderstandings. We cannot help but say, “Then know that the Chinese did not invade or bomb your country.” I’m sorry.

“Yes, no. But you are still outsiders, one of the great powers, not so bad. You have the ability to defend yourself and to commit evil. You’re not us. You don’t understand. I’m sorry.

“We are all human beings. I’m sorry.

She shook her head and laughed: “Everyone is a man, and only a few have the chance to control their own destiny, and the rest is an illusion.” I’m sorry.

On the dark ocean, a piece of aircraft remains burning and falling, and the night is as bright as day.

In the shadows, I found myself standing in the deep, deep sea. In front of them are the bald, safe, island shallows, behind them the sea and the sea and a row of waves. The dark-oiled sea was filled with strange red light, the wreckage of the aircraft fell and the fuel burned in silence.

The waves were held hostage by tiny fragments that drifted over my legs, metal debris, plastic sheeting, oil stains, an arm and half a leg. I thought there was thunder and lightning ahead until a line of bullets with red tracers swept across the water, blowing up a bunch of water flowers, and I woke up. From the sky to the ground and then to the sea, there were gunfire and fighting.

I don’t know why I didn’t fall and the parachute didn’t open, but it can only be interpreted as a last-minute fall that saved my life.

I’m in the water with my stiff legs like lead, and I swim towards the shallows. Invisible anti-aircraft guns deployed in various parts of the island opened fire at the same time, projecting orange red curtains into the night sky and woven an intensive fire network. The sound of the blast echoes in high air, and the flashing fire sets out the dome and horizon, and must have fallen after the explosion of a small vehicle such as a drone. This was a wave of exchange, the defensive position was exposed, the retaliation of the attacking party dropped from the air with precision, and the impact of an invisible missile spread out, squirting my bones like thunder.

I climbed ashore and was pleased to see that I was not the only survivor of the crash.

At least one third of the 20 mercenaries successfully opened their parachute. I found several familiar faces on the beach. Scarface, red-haired tattooed sisters are alive. There should be more people scattered around the island and unable to gather together. Everyone’s a chicken, nine dead, full of fire.

“Intelligence is wrong. Where the fuck is this deserted island? There’s a guard on the island, and as soon as we got into range, we got hit by a surface missile! “The scar’s face is a new wound, and the rifle is being examined and scolded.

A wave of waves pushes fragments of ammunition containers and well-bracked corpses to shore to see what is going on.

They heard a noise, and the gun pointed at me, and I waved at them.

“What a fucking miracle! The tourist girl didn’t fall into a meatloaf, and we’re dying. Scarface asks her, “What’s next? I’m sorry.

Following the death of the guidees, command was transferred to the red-haired written sister.

The red-haired-haired sister, even in such a precarious situation, whose eyes shined like a sword, came close to me and looked at me: “Can you continue?” I’m sorry.

I said no problem.

“Good, because you’re all that’s left. I’m sorry.

Her words struck me.

20

They covered my way to the beach. I saw Seo Yong.

He died almost immediately and was cut in two by a seatbelt and left above his waist. It’s dark. It’s hard to recognize. Guns continued and fire and explosions were widespread. Two medical personnel, who had come from the sea, were carrying instruments and kneeling next to Seo Yong. You gotta be kidding me. This guy’s half dead.

“He must have been wrapped up in a seatbelt. The cabin did not fall vertically, but was slashed to the surface. In the instant of the crash, the impact produces enormous power, and a tape can cut off the body. The red-haired sister came to me and comforted me by saying, “There were too many people who died one night, at least he walked fast and did not suffer. I’m sorry.

“I don’t believe…”

“You need time to slow down, I understand. You’re close. I’m sorry.

“This idiot… he’s stupid and he’s dragging me in. How can he say he’s dead? It’s still this way of dying. I’m sorry.

“What about the mission? The mercenaries asked her, she looked at me.

“Go on as planned. She said, “You know what a doctor is, you don’t send tourists to the bunker, and no one of us is going home. I’m sorry.

“East, North and South are enemies. I’m sorry.

“Let their dogs bite their dogs and kill themselves. As long as you stay out of the way, you can’t see. I’m sorry.

“Look out! I’m sorry.

A hand grenade detonated five metres away when a sandstorm broke out.

“Shoot, what are you waiting for?”

Scary-faced me, I fell, I turned over, my eyes and mouth filled with sand. My head is ringing and my eyes are spinning. The Sand Tower mercenaries operated with tactical action, fired in tandem and returned fire, and fought back. The bullets were groaning and deafening. Screamed, people fell down, people were blown up in the air, blood in the eyelids.

I struggled to get up, and there were several coconut trees in front of the left, and there was a white, transparent light under the tree. If I hadn’t seen that face, I’d say it was a white tumour or a dying moon. A cold war, the dawn of the moon. I remember concrete cages, human traffickers, those kids, the seven little ones with three toes missing, the blue eyes, the pig, and…

“Demon! “The 7th stared round blue eyes.

“I am a dreamer and a debt seeker. “The devil smiled at me.

“You will forget this conversation until the day we meet again. I’m sorry.

See him, I remember everything. Danny Moon-Sick!

The smoke spread, two medics died, and the still alive spy shouted, “He’s still breathing!” I’m sorry.

“What did you say?”

“It’s very weak, but it’s still beating. He’s not dead! I’m sorry.

Here we go again. Watch out!

Take cover!

A light running through my chest. When I realized it was actually a bullet, my body fell back uncontrollably.

Flash…

On the day we left Bangkok, Seo Yong and I were waiting for a bus boat at the Mekong River pier. A blue-flagged boat had come in, but it had not yet stopped, and a group of visiting mothers had been killed in a violent manner, and had broken their heads to get on board, rather than falling into the water or falling behind.

“How many seats on a boat are fixed and what is the hold-up? You don’t have to sit down! I’ve raised my sarcasm behind the team.

“There is a serious lack of resources and insufficient productivity per capita. This is the result of maximizing competitiveness among people. Suh Yong says:

“Don’t look like nothing else. They can cut in, and so can we. I’ll tell you what, I’ll just squeeze them into the water. I’m sorry.

“There is a reason why these ships are called bus boats, operating in the same way as buses, on the same line for minutes. Stand up, line up and wait for the next one. I’m sorry.

“You!”

He told me that stupid people do stupid things, stupid people do things that smart people don’t want to do. I hate to say, “You and I are stupid for a long time. I’m sorry.

“That’s just a metaphor. I’m sorry.

“I think you’re stupid enough. You’re a fool. Don’t pull me. I’m sorry.

“I don’t mind being a fool.” There are smart people and there are stupid people. Everyone was born to be the lead player, but in reality it was impossible for everyone to stand on the stage and give a round of applause, and someone had to stay under the stage. Hey, that’s not a good metaphor. I mean, people are not supposed to work, and it is important to work in the direction. If every single person wonders how to climb on the heads of those around him every day, we are doomed to death. That would seem to be an effort, rather than an escape, to make things worse rather than better, without solving the problem. At the end of the day, the karma bounced back. As long as you’re still in the cycle, you’ll taste the consequences. I’m sorry.

“What do you want to say? I’m sorry.

“Someone likes to walk good, I respect and understand; but others have to walk bad. Do not make evil small, and do not do good little. I now understand that maintaining the balance at a larger level is vital for us all. I’m sorry.

Seven…

I remember everything but him, no matter how hard I remember, and I can’t remember his end.

That day, I ran away from Dr. Hanazuki and ran out of the gate, and then what happened?

I’m…

I was running under my feet, falling around the dark, damp, puddled, dead, stairwells of cement, tracking the tracks of the Seven and the traffickers. It was supposed to be a nightmare that I would never have had in my life, but it was wiped down by the words of the doctor of the flowers. I saw a documentary on the Chernobyl accident on television, where abandoned Soviet-era nuclear facilities appeared. The sewage spills, the walls fall off, the slits of steel undertows, rusty, enough to withstand a nuclear explosion, a madly fragranced revolving blastproof door. In every corner there is a mountain of secret, forgotten documents. The cold, depressed, weird cold-war fossils.

I broke into the abyss and fell one by one in a narrow, rotting stairwell. I feel like I’m hundreds of metres deep underground, one foot in the gates of hell, afraid that I will never see the sun again.

As I get deeper, there’s a bad smell in the closed space. Blood smell, death vibe, fungus, disinfectant water, FFL. I slipped under my feet and grabbed the swaying rail brakes and almost one flew into the pit. There’s so much blood on the steps, and it’s red, and it’s smooth. What did they do to him?

The answer is on the corner of the next stairs.

The ground left behind a broken leg, and the little one lost three toes. The shadows also have more dramatic contours and more parts of the body. The scream trail was sprayed from my body looking for a crack, followed by a white light. I remember, that was my first flash…

21

In conclusion, tell us how the monsoon rain and me ended, or there will be no more chance.

We were together for a total of 126 days, four months, and in the middle we went through nine flash cycles. Everything begins and ends.

24th flash, that was the last time I returned to Wuhan for her. When I was looking for a long-distance car passing through Wuhan a few hundred kilometres away, the grandmother of Qin Rain passed away in ICU.

In the middle of it, it seems like it’s natural. The bond of affection trapped her in place and could not travel far. That’s why she needs me. The two of us, trapped for different reasons, have developed a bond, a close dependencies that transform between friends, lovers and family. On the day when she is set free, I will remain the same, and will neither change nor change. This delicate, fratricidal and unexplainable connection has come to an end.

When I went back, she took up the latest Andre flag plane in the third quarter of this year, lying on that very simplistic sofa for $800,000, surrounded by expensive, comfortable, lazy household items. She’s watching B standing on a ghost video and eating Korean fried chicken. She was laughing.

She’s almost packed her luggage, and she’ll fly straight to Serbia in the morning after the funeral of the elderly. I came back here to wish her a good trip, to have fun and to wait for half a day without knowing how to speak. At that point, her phone rang and her high school girlfriend, who was a switch student in England, was going to video her. They talk about life abroad, local weather and food, and, of course, boys and girls. Her best friend and she had a bad water quality in England, came over there for six months and dropped a lot of hair. I sat around and listened to them laughing.

“Rain, I support you as a friend to come out and see. Really, if you want to do art, you have to have a global perspective. I joined an NGO in London, and I’m not going home this year, and I’m going with them to Africa to fund the hungry children there. They’re too loving and responsible to be with them. I’m really lucky to have learned so much. The other side says:

I heard them talking on the phone for over an hour about art, fashion, philosophy, charity, environmental protection, global warming, sea level rise. I’m sorry to say that, but I just want to throw up when I hear their feelings of pity for Middle Eastern refugees, African children and wildlife in the Amazon rainforest. It’s a joke. You have to put money on someone’s face. I’m thinking of the words of the Zin Jianli: “The earth is not for you to save, you are for yourself.”

It’s true that when a person is 20, 30, 40, he may have a different view of the same thing, but it doesn’t matter.

I know from the bottom of my heart that I just don’t want to face it. I’m actually two strangers to her. I’m not one of them. Even if I could understand her, she wouldn’t.

She is humbled, frugal, courteous, hardworking and self-reliant. I’ve never seen her waste of food, leftovers of rice every night in the fridge and left for the next day to make fried rice; every time I buy food in a box, I can’t spend more than $30 on it, I have to smile and say “thank you.” She did quite well in her environment. But in my village, where I grew up, I didn’t even see the delivery boy.

There is no dramatic conflict of love, hatred or hatred. I know myself, others and reality. That’s it, enough.

I sincerely wish her a good trip and a good time when she hangs up. And then when she fell asleep, I put down the temporary key and took my pocket and left her Loft apartment. There’s no need to leave a note. I know it’s the last time.

On the highway from Wuhan, I put my head against the cold window and laughed. This is the first time that I have left my home and decided to stay with my own will, rather than just standing there waiting for a flash.

I saw the rest of the seven.

He was left with four limbs and one eye was blindfolded with a cloud, with only the right eye being able to use it, with a small, empty abdomen covered with scars with multiple surgical stitches, lying on a bed of crib size, with white sheets on half-entangled, with a small ovation of the chest, and a bunch of seemingly sophisticated life support devices. He was covered from the top to the bottom with colourful pipes, gas, nose, urine, fluids. They almost emptied his skinny, stunted body from inside. How could he survive this? How cruel is it to let him live like this?

I thought he was dead two years ago. I have lost a coherent memory, forgotten him and turned away from him because of a word from Dr. Flower. For two years, I’ve spent a lot of time, but I’ve never tried to save him.

And We bowed before the bed of the Seven, and We were humbled, seeking death. He opened his right eye, still blue, but no longer like a star or an ocean, more like a glassball floating in glass water. “You’re here. Am I dreaming? Two years, like the next day. He blinked and licked the gray, dry lips.

“Hold on, Seven. I’m gonna take you home and take you back to your sister. *He smells like a stench of stench in his drink, and I try so hard to hold on to my wavering face *

He looks exhausted, and he’s swirling, and he’s got his mouth in his mouth.

“Sorry, I know it’s too late. I’m not asking you to forgive me. I should have come earlier. I’m sorry.

“Don’t be silly you’re you, I’m me, you’re not responsible for me.” He closes his eyes with a smile, shakes his head, a tear cuts through his eyes, and says, “I don’t really have a sister. I wish to have a sister. I’m sorry.

Something’s wrong. The life support screens on the bedside are darkening. The machine went on strike, and he showed a painful look and had difficulty breathing.

“Seven? Who did it? Son of a bitch, tell me what switch I’m gonna put on. I’m sorry.

“Just like this, don’t touch anything. I’m sorry.

“Don’t be silly. I found you so hard. Let me think, I have an idea. I’m sorry.

“Sorry to show you what I look like I promised the devil and made a deal with him. He fulfilled my wish and now it’s my turn. I’m sorry.

“I don’t understand you! I’m sorry.

“Bye, island…”

No, no, no!

“Remember I’ve been here before…”

Don’t say that. I beg you. Don’t give up! I’m sorry.

Sister…

In the sound of the machine ‘ s alarm, seven young men were convulsed in a violent manner. After a convulsion, three long horizons appeared on the EKG. He silently spits out his last breath, dead.

22

“Blessed are the bones of the undecided river, and they are in the dream of spring. “More than a hundred years ago, Marx said, “Man is an economic animal. What a wonderful idea. Like killing fish for the insides, they emptyed him and sold all the valuables. I warned you this would happen. I’m sorry.

I knew he’d come. I just didn’t think he’d come so fast. I hate this guy, he won’t give me a second to breathe or even give me time to mourn. His hands behind our backs. I stood up to him, from head to toe, and he was like a superrealist plaster sculpture.

“You are a monster. I should have known that you were keeping the seven. I’m sorry.

“I fulfill my wishes, harvest costs, and maintain balance. The young man wanted to see you before he died and his wish had been fulfilled, and he had to repay the enormous resources consumed to sustain his meaningless life. I’m sorry.

His word “no sense of life” provoked me and I cried, “You killed him!” I’m sorry.

“No, on the contrary. I helped him, gave him the power to live, extended his life, and offered an option that would not have existed. After he was left alone, it was me who ended his pain. I’m sorry.

Bullshit! Murderer!

“This is a lonely, desolate planet, where there is never a savior, no God, no higher than human existence. Human beings, whatever they want, must be personal, overcome their plight and sweat. “A long time ago, I vowed not to see the young innocents pray for heaven in vain before they died, and no one heard them and couldn’t respond. You know what I did? Like the one with the chicken or the egg, I made my first wish. I became me to fulfill my wishes. Then there you are.

I’ve really had enough. If I had a gun in my hand, I swear, I would not hesitate to blow up his white, oily head and shut him up and put an end to this.

“You did.” He laughed.

All of a sudden, I had an extra pistol in my hand. I was so shocked by this “iron bump” that my arms were falling down.

“Kill me, blow my head off. You’ve had enough of this ugly face of mine, of this loss of weight that’s floating in space, and you don’t know what to do. You take control of your destiny by deciding when you die. You have the gun. You don’t have to listen to me. You think so, don’t you? I’m sorry.

“Shut up, shut up…”

“You’ve got a gun, you’ve got a loaded bullet, you’ve got insurance, so what? Shoot and avenge Xiao 7 and Seo Yong. I used them, lied to them. They’re all dead. They’re all dead. Poor little girl, wandering around the world, nobody remembers you. You have no name in people’s eyes, no contact, no luck. Even beggars are worse, beggars have homes and friends. The only thing that wants you is those pornos with their cocks. Until today, once you close your eyes, you can remember the touch of men licking your body with their dirty eyes, like the transparent slime that snails crawl through their skin. It’s dry, but it still stinks and itches. You’ve always had the same nightmare, in which you’ve been screaming naked to a row of black waves and waking up. My dear Ejima, please answer. What’s wrong with me? I’m sorry.

“Shut up! I’m sorry.

I shook my hand and pulled the trigger, with a huge back-scatter and a burst of gunshots shaking myself in the back. He’s still laughing. I had a heart, imitating the gun position of the Shasta mercenaries, and in exchange for a handgun, shot him three times in the face of his ugly smile. The first two were shot, the third was shot in the eye, and his face was blown up.

“Good shot, that’s why I like you. I’m sorry.

“You… exactly…”

He was shot down, and the sound in his abdomen continued: “This age turns people into machines and machines into people.” You were born and raised on the edge of the center of civilization, and it’s a lucky thing to keep the human trait of the 20th century on you. Do you know anything about the 20th century war? A lot of them just grown up. The machine gun strafed their young bodies, broke in two pieces and did not immediately die, lying in the blood bells crying out for their mother with their last strength and wanting to go home. Look, this is the common part of humanity. Whichever side you belong to, which mother tongue you speak, most people cry out to their mother before they die and go home. What about your generation? Your indifference, your desire, your isolation, your inability to distinguish between myths and reality, your inability to say who you are, your homelessness, your indifference to the outside world and even to yourself, have no meaning in life. You’ll suffer harm in silence, suffer and die in silence, like a bunch of industrial robots coming down the waterline, and your head will be broken. Is this evolution or degradation? Good thing you kept a little bloodish. I like bloodish people. People are not human, not even animals. I’m sorry.

“I respect your right to speak, even though you fart. “Don’t take yourself too seriously, you’re no different from the porno-crazy I met on the road.” The difference is you’re uglyer than them. I’m sorry.

He’s lying there with a loud laugh, and it makes me feel like it’s the first time he’s laughing from his heart.

The laughter moved from his abdomen to the machine in front of the seven-bed, and then to the body of the seven, to the corridor of the wall. The door was pushed from the outside and a cat with a yin face jumped in with a cat.

The cat sounded the voice of the flower doctor: “Many years ago, I was like this young man, killed by the enemies. Before I died, I copied my brain, uploaded consciousness. I have countless incarnations in many places. How many guesses do you have? I’m sorry.

“What’s this?”

“The only daughter of South African diamond tycoon abandoned an electronic cat pet. I’m sorry.

“What do you want from us? “I can’t help but cry.

And the cat raised a claw, pointing to my chest: “Question yourself about this, you made a wish to me.” I’m sorry.

“I didn’t…” I bowed my head and suddenly thought of something.

Guns are no longer needed, they can’t kill him anyway. I threw away my gun, pulled my blood-stained red collar with my shivering fingers, and saw a bullet wound in my left chest. In the eyes of a yellow cat, I put a finger into the wound and looked inside. It was almost a moment of relief all over me as if I knew the answer. It’s only a little bit of blood on the skin surface, and there’s no blood or flesh in me.

“Your little friend is wrong. There is no self-protection mechanism. When you were in the desert, you triggered an instant move because I couldn’t let you find out. I’m sorry.

“The truth? I’m sorry.

“Use high-energy particle beams to break non-living objects into subatomic particles and send them to random or specified coordinates, which is what you call a flash. Upon arrival, the particles are reassembled from energy into matter. Prototype machines have been developed by scientists in your country to explore the feasibility of instantaneous delivery of organisms, but animal experiments are a disaster. With the existing human understanding of biology and quantum physics, it has not been possible to perfectly reorganize all the particles that make up the organism, and experimental rats have been confused without exception. Researchers have concluded that it is not feasible to transmit life at this stage. It is theoretically possible to transmit a substance, which is limited to volume and materials, in stringent conditions and lacking in practicality. I’m sorry.

“I don’t understand…”

“The body you now use is an empty shell. The cat says, “The source is the legacy of a secret military research in the United States, a high-performance permeability human drone. They are used to replace ordinary soldiers after tactical nuclear weapons have been struck, and are placed in the enemy’s coastal areas, where they are remotely operated by their operators to carry out large-scale invasion operations. This is not yet the craziest brain hole in this consensual new cold war. The project was frozen shortly after its inception, and its extensive introduction of Indian software engineers did not solve simple control system errors. On their basis, I have completed the remaining work, which was intended to be used as my own backup. I’m sorry.

“that means…”

“Your instant movement is possible because it transmits an empty human shell with a thin layer of body tissue. Not a living thing. It’s a lot harder. Following the reorganisation of the shell, the consciousness is synchronized through an ubiquitous network. There’s been a few minutes, but you’ve been making trans-temporal shifts, which are very subjective. I’m sorry.

“But I don’t think…”

“Don’t think you’re a machine? Feel like you’re still a flesh and blood? In most cases, subjective perceptions are easily manipulated. I moved a little, shielded and tampered with some technical flaws you didn’t have to see. All you have to do is believe you’re Jiangjia. I’m sorry.

The sound of a dreary explosion came from far above. The white and flawless ceiling is shaking, the dust is falling, electricity is unstable and the lights flash.

I consciously went to see Seven: “So you said I had no heartbeat…”

“I gave you a simple digestive system. You don’t eat. Food excretion is both a disguise and a response to psychological needs. I’m sorry.

I turned to the cat: “It was not the first time we met in that concrete cage two years ago. I’m sorry.

“I said no. I’m sorry.

“What else did I forget? I’m sorry.

“Only you have chosen to forget painful memories. Cat says, “You’ve been dead since the beginning. Anesthesia caused you to have a severe allergy shock, and your heart stopped once on a smuggling ship outside Pasheng. The mediocre on the ship managed to restore your heart beat, but was unable to do anything about your cardiovascular function and your bronchial convulsions. You’ve turned from an economic animal into a negative asset. The traffickers decided to stop the damage in time to save the valuables while you’re not cold. I’m sorry.

There is neither sorrow nor anger, but a sense of release after acceptance of the facts. Following his voice, I saw a picture: On the dark, unlighted sea, they cut me apart. The boat sailed on the high seas and its crew threw blood and limbs into the sea. That’s why my body became a seed in a dream, with the wind and the sea and the land and sea.

While hurting me, the traffickers lifted up their cell phones and filmed the whole process, which was posted on the black market on the net for people to pay to watch. They took pictures of me with “V” gestures covered in my face and laughed. That’s when I saw him, Danny Moon-Sick, Dr. Flower Moon. The mobile camera and microphone became his eyes and ears. He exists as long as there is electronic access. And he came, and he turned down on the stars and on the moon’s CDs, and looked down at me, and he would die in pieces. I don’t need to talk. He can read my mind.

“I will fulfill your wish. He scanned my brain, backed up my consciousness and said, “You will die, the other one will live, enjoy the natural life you deserve, do all the things you wanted to do before you didn’t have the chance to do, walk around, see the beautiful, ugly world and pay for it. I’m sorry.

“The price? “I asked him with my blood stuck in my eyes.

“You get what people in your same position want and you don’t get, and you’re no better and worth it than them. As a balance, you must go on in their place and not stop until you travel the whole world. Through you, people who don’t exist will be everywhere. I’m sorry.

Wake up. Get away from me, it’s all over. My biological mother sold me, and the world kissed me in pain, and no one helped me, except him. As I was dying, he was the only one who could hear the cries that I could not send, and came for me. I can no longer be hostile to the man before me.

“I owe you thanks for whatever you did. I said to the cat.

“You owe me nothing. The price is paid. I’m sorry.

There’s another bang, and the ceiling is shaking.

“We’re still on the island?”

“Deepest in WON41.” He said, “Don’t you recognize it yet? Tens of metres up, you were held in your cell that year. I’m sorry.

“I see. I’m sorry.

“After the departure of the United States troops, the human trafficking organization took possession of the island’s facilities and used it as a secret transit point for their criminal trade. This is their concrete garden, with white bones in every wall. Sea level rises, and after their evacuation, the evil remains remain. I’m sorry.

“Dr. Flower Moon, you spread false news and tricked those outside to get you. I’m sorry.

“Steal with poison. “I’m the kind of guy who likes to go and do things.” I am here to use their physical strength to fulfil their aspirations. I’m sorry.

Whose wish?

“Look around you, since the human trafficking organization took over the island, 1215 children have died here, with the same wish in every bone. I’m sorry.

“What is it? I’m sorry.

“You’re one of them, don’t you think? Fair and just, to be remembered. I’m sorry.

“I don’t understand why you waited until today, given your ability. I’m sorry.

“I’m just a lamentation, a ghost, not a physical force, not a change. Moreover, when the evils are eliminated, the good will to fill the gap is enough to create chaos. I’m sorry.

An unprecedented blast wave from the surface of the Earth was felt that the bunker structure had been damaged and the walls had collapsed. I’m not standing up and sitting on the floor.

“Someone dropped a drill bomb while in the process. Guess why? To destroy the evidence. I’m sorry.

Explosion, fire, smoke, collapse. A layer of ceiling collapsed in pieces, showing the white bones in an empty concrete hole, a cry, and burying the beds of the seven.

“I told you long before everything started. Mark Tube, fate. I’m sorry.

“That man is you?”

“Bye, Jiangjima. We’ll never see each other again. I’m sorry.

Dr. Flower Moon!

I’ve got too much to ask him, but Dr. Fleur speaks for himself. The moment the steel and cement fell, it was over.

23

After dawn, I returned to the beach.

While the forces of WON41 retreated in the night, the fighting that lasted all night ended, and no one was the last winner.

Four of the 20 Sand Tower mercenaries were alive to see the sun rise, and the red hair sister was one of them.

There are many bodies piled up on the beach with a familiar face. The one-on-one young man we met in Chittagong, wearing a dark gray combat uniform, carrying an assault rifle, holding a gun belt and bleeding under a coconut tree.

“You’re better at taking pictures than weapons. I said to him, “The dead don’t answer.

I came to the beach, and the people who survived surrounded Seo Yong by eight forks, blowing the sea wind. While talking to me in the bunker, Dr. Moon established contact with them on the battlefield and issued instructions.

The medic was well protected by his teammates. His hands handed me a box of strange shapes, with a living heart, the heart of Seo-won, which had just been removed.

They covered Seo Yong with a piece of rag.

“A heart for a heart. “The medical officer said,

“Is that what Dr. Hanaki meant? I said, “Is this how it was arranged from the beginning?” I’m sorry.

He shrugged his shoulder and repeated what he had just said: “A heart for a heart.” Your friend, he needs a perfect heart in every way to save another. I checked the heart. There’s no better heart than this one in his chest. I’m sorry.

“This is the price, right?”

“I don’t know, I’m just a soldier. I’m sorry.

“Don’t let me see you again, and I’ll kill you.” I’m sorry.

“Get used to it. * The other side, fearing my threats, shook its head away *

The red-haired tattooed sister sat on her knees at the seaside and all her equipment was taken off and dropped on her feet. Behind the back is a groaning, and someone closes the eyes of a fallen comrade. I covered her chest with my jacket and sat next to her.

“What’s the fight between a flower doctor and a transnational giant? I asked.

She’s got a mint lady’s cigarette in her mouth, with no face or eyes: “In my home, on the freeway, she hits the deer from time to time. An animal like deer seems to be spiritual, but it’s clumsy, and you can’t think when you run, and you can only do one thing at the same time. Humans have a misunderstanding about animals, who think they’re smart and are born to jump and jump. In fact, animals, like humans, make a lot of mistakes and learn all the time. My home-based animal protection organization provides opportunities for error and learning by drawing up a buffer zone between wastelands and towns for limited human and animal contact. I’m sorry.

“What does this have to do with my problem? I’m sorry.

“I’m not Dr. Flower. I don’t know what he’s up to. If I were him, I might want to break the island-like situation between different worlds. I’m sorry.

“Preventive?”

“There will be a dramatic change in the world sooner or later. Perhaps we are already in the process of radical change. A new round of conflicts would come sooner or later in different countries, civilizations, races, nationalities, religions, geographical circumstances and levels of development. There are those who want to find ways of inclusive coexistence in conflict, and those who want to speed up the arrival of conflict and make a profit. I’m sorry.

“Doctor Flower Moon is the former? I’m sorry.

“Huh. She smiled, “He was the first crab eater, he had no precedent in replicating his brain, and there was a lot of missing in his execution, and perhaps his humanity. I’m sorry.

“You know? I thought it was a secret. I’m sorry.

“It’s a secret that everyone who’s been working with Dr. Fazuki on many occasions has heard the story of his consciousness digital. His quest for mechanical balance is far better than his quest for justice. Whichever is stronger, he will stand on the weaker side. He’s not human anymore. He’s a machine. He didn’t forget his first heart, and when his first heart changed, he grew something new. Pray that one day he won’t suddenly turn his face and run to another camp! I’m sorry.

“Damn it. I’m sorry.

“Yeah, right. I’m sorry.

We all smiled in different moods.

♪ Sleeping in someone’s dreams ♪

You won’t find a new country, you won’t find another coast. This city will always follow you. You’ll walk on the same streets, you’ll grow old in the same places you know, you’ll have white hair in the same rooms. You’ll always find yourself in this city. Do not hope for anything else: there is no your ship, nor is there your way.

– Cavafis City.

Three months later, I picked up a bunch of unsuspected technology magazines in an old bookstore in Chengdu City, and spread the paper. An article attracted my attention.

The future of the food-net balance project is uncertain.

In 2014, Dr. Xu Jie, born in Sian, gave up the generous offer to work in Canada and travelled with his wife, Dr. Wang Jin, to the Sunshine Biopharmaceuticals Group in Xian District, Mayor of Xian, Shaanxi Province. As the initiator and team leader of the national food web balance study, Xu Jie and Wang Jin led the team in overcoming a number of technical challenges and filling several gaps.

For 15 years, both spouses have worked on the operationalization of the Food Network Balance Project. The Group has invested significant financial resources to support both people in developing early ecological early warning systems. The system, when deployed, can be used to reveal the timing of ecological megavariations and, at a later stage, to predict precisely which species in which areas would lead to ecological megavariations. By controlling the number of predators at the top of the food web, humans have actively intervened to adapt the local food web and reshape the whole food web. Xu Jie and Wang Jin believe that in the post-emergence era of fragile ecosystems, the project can help to achieve a new, larger-scale real-time dynamic balance between people and nature.

However, no one could have expected that, on the night before the system went online, Xu Jie and Wang Zhen went deep into the Qin Ridge and experienced extreme weather and tragic deaths. The food network team, which had lost its leader, was demoralized and the system had to go online to delay. According to information sources, the team was paralysed after losing the couple and was no longer able to finish the job.

According to the information received, Xu Jie and Wang Jin have a son who lives with his parents in Sian and whose whereabouts have recently been unknown …

This is my 84th flash. Can you believe it? It has been a year since Tsui Yin came to the Arawa desert and convinced me to take that fantastic journey with him.

Life is like a white gap and time is running so fast that people are scared. And since then, I have returned to the state of a man, alone, alone, driven by a force, walking around, unable to stop.

For a year, no matter how far I am, I have been following closely the situation of someone.

Zhou Zhou Zhou, Seo Yong’s Tang Jiu sister saved his girl with a shrubbery. For me, a stranger as familiar as ever.

Tsui Yun traded her own heart for her new life. They told me that Dr. Hanaki had already stated the price to Seo Yong, and that he had made his choice by his own will by boarding the plane to the island of the absence of the western Pacific Ocean.

I’m sure the Shasta people didn’t lie. It doesn’t matter anymore.

From the inside and out, every link was arranged, and his secret manipulation of humans and computers was like a smooth, sophisticated magic show. No one questioned the origin of the heart, and there were no procedural or technical obstacles to it, and Seo Yong ‘ s heart was successfully transplanted into the chorus.

The operation was very successful.

The man who received the heart survived.

I used my precious time of freedom to return to Sian and to the city where Tsui Yin was born and raised. I’m not a man who likes to go back, but I’d like to make an exception for him.

On that day, standing on the beach of the island of non-existence with his warm heart in his hand, I fell. I do not know where they took his missing remains or where they buried them. I’m sure Dr. Fleur backed up his brain, and that man would do it.

A few months later, I received text messages and e-mails informing me that I had acquired digital heritage rights over a large number of accounts in Seo Yong. He made me his only family member without consulting me. When he dies, the power is automatically transferred to me.

I inherited all the digital property that he left me, including a small amount of tail, including his laptop, so that I could log in directly by my thumb.

Now I just came back from his empty house and took away electronic devices that no one but me could open. I pulled out the Mandrake anti-fouler out of my pocket, kissed him, put it on his desk and said goodbye.

I opened a room at a hotel across the street from their home, put his laptop on his knee and started typing.

To dear strangers:

When you receive this letter, you must be sleeping in your big, soft bed, and you’re probably dreaming beautifully.

You don’t know me, but you and I have a friend in common. I know you through this common friend.

I don’t know if you feel the same way about me. A guy you can’t see at first sight can be the most important person in your life.

Maybe you think that last year was a miracle for yourself. Because you’re a good girl, so young, you’re just beginning, you’ve never hurt anyone. So God took care of you, giving you what people in your same situation want, but not what they don’t.

Or maybe you’re smart and sensitive, and you secretly realize things aren’t that simple. Where you can’t see it, someone’s going for you. It is not luck that you survive to have a new heart, but the inevitable result of the unrewarded dedication of others to you.

It doesn’t matter what you think, whether it’s a miracle or someone’s preference for you.

Maybe when you’re back in health, you’re anxious to embrace the new generation, enjoy the little beauty of every day, and you don’t notice anyone disappearing from you. Maybe you noticed, just didn’t connect two things together.

Let me tell you the truth.

The truth is the same as what you thought you could not believe. Listen to your heart beating at this moment. This heart will not lie.

The owner of this heart once said to me that I have the power to change others and I have changed him. But actually, he changed me. It was his kindness and courage that allowed a ghost who had died in his country to regain her humanity. He convinced me that perhaps the life of a human being could indeed continue in that form.

Dear stranger, listen to me. You’re not just yourself. You live in his life during the day, and in the night you sleep in the dreams that others make.

And there is one who believes that the small good will end in the great good, that the small evil will end in the great evil, and that he will pay the price for his faith, the miracle of which is the present. I believe in his description of you and that you will do the same for him when you know the truth.

If he’s alive, he won’t let you know. At least he’ll give you a few choices, but I won’t. He’s dead. I don’t want to carry his memory alone. You’re well protected by those who love you. You owe us.

I have attached a link at the end, and you have to go in and make a wish for him in the way I taught you.

Whatever they ask, you have to. If you get in trouble, I’ll help you.

You have to pay for yourself and me and make a wish to bring him back.

When you repay what you owe, everything will be balanced. You will live in peace, enjoy this beautiful, broken world, and enjoy every day you do not deserve.

Good luck!

A stranger.

The end–

□ Tang Xinwon

Record number: YX01MVomQG2lg5WB6

Published in 2022-03-17 15:37 Prohibition of Reproduction

Deep fear.

Darkness and light: deep space, dream and science fiction outside of time

Tang Xinwon, wait!

I don’t know.

Keep your eyes on the road.