I didn’t have anything to do with wheat in web class.
My mother’s house is breaking my voice, listening to the whole class.
They sent the tape on the Internet and went for a hot search.
Under pressure, my mother responded:
“The child stole her father’s money for his treatment, so he started to educate. I’m sorry.
It was a time when the scolding fell like a mountain and drowned me.
They scolded me, but I’d rather die than be a good daughter.
But it’s your brother who stole the money.
Later, I was killed by flesh and the whole world apologized to me.
But I’m not rare anymore.
One.
I was called by the teacher to answer the questions during the Internet class.
Just halfway through, my mom’s back.
She fell on the door, threw the key over the table and called me:
Zhou!
I’m unconscious.
I haven’t had time to turn off the microphone, and my mom’s pissed off.
She pulls my hair up, and she makes me look up and look at her, and she asks:
“Where’s the money? I’m sorry.
She’s got me all over my skin.
“What money?”
I covered my head, I couldn’t understand it.
Every time she gets angry, she talks about my hair. She’s strong.
I’ve had a lot of headaches.
I even sarcasticly wondered if I’d shave it so she wouldn’t get it.
My mother never answered my questions in peace.
She used to use sarcasm, slander and cross-examination.
It’s like when I asked her what kind of money was it? # When #
Her first reaction, one hand to my hair and the other to my ear:
“How dare you ask me? What kind of money are you talking about? I’m sorry.
I suddenly had an irritation in my heart:
“I don’t know. I’m on the Internet. Can you hold on a second? I’m sorry.
But the next second, she dragged me out of the chair and kicked me to the ground.
My head was on the floor, and my head was spinning and my chest was kicked in pain.
And then, in my ear, my mother’s fury:
“You still have face class? You dare steal your father’s dialysis!
“I work hard to raise you, you eat and drink, and you’re mad at me!
“Your dad’s dying, you know? You steal money? Do you want your father to die? I’m sorry.
I’m starting to get it out of her scolding. My mother lost her money.
My dad’s got urine poisoning, dialysis every week.
She went to the hospital today to pay her fees and found that the other $2,000 from the bank, Kari, had been brushed away.
And that bank card, which I used to pay for in school.
I know the code.
I asked her for money to buy headphones, but she didn’t.
So she thinks I stole the money.
I’ve fallen on the ground, and I’m already in pain, and I’m filled with anger, frustration and even hate.
But I only said three words:
“Not me.”
I would also like to say a few more words, and I would like to argue with her precisely.
It’s just that I’ve tried before. It’s useless.
I tried to talk to her and begged her to take it down.
I was hysterically arguing, trying to fight her.
But every time I say more, the more angry my mom gets, the harder I get.
Until now, I have learned too many lessons, and the only expression that I am not happy with is that — not me.
But even these three words can provoke her nervous nerves.
My mother hit me in the head with a book on the computer table and kicked out the chair, followed by a punch and kick.
She looked into my eyes, filled with resentment, and looked at her daughter like a mother.
She looks like a dog.
And I’m the dog who lives in this house.
She yelled:
“Who else could it be? There’s only three of us! You mean your brother stole it?
“Every time you make a mistake, you throw it over your brother!”
I had the instinct to protect my head and hum it in pain, and my forehead was also bruised by the brows, and blood came out and reached my eyes.
By blood, I opened my eyes and saw my brother standing outside the door.
He watched me get beat up.
When he looked in my eyes, he had a slight tweak in his face.
In that moment, I was almost certain…
I hit him all for him, but he wouldn’t give a shit.
Two.
The other day, I had a hard-on and asked my mom for money once.
Fifty bucks is enough. I want a new headphone.
Because my brother always plays games, he doesn’t listen, and the noise really affects my online classes.
My mom called me a loser because of that headphone.
She said I couldn’t concentrate on myself. How come there’s some weird-faced brother?
She wouldn’t give me that $50.
But the next day, my brother said she wanted to buy a new pair of shoes, and she went straight to my brother 500.
I was standing in front of the window, watching my brother wear shoes, playing with his peers on the field, sweating, laughing.
I’m so jealous.
I always thought…
I wouldn’t be so upset if my mother were to have one tenth of my brother’s patience.
But I don’t have one in ten.
Last month’s end of exams, my grades were down, and at the parents’ meeting, the teacher said something.
My mom didn’t have a seizure at school.
When I went home to cook, I fell off a bowl and yelled at me so I could drop out of school.
I don’t want to drop out of school. I’m desperate to get out of here.
Leaving this house has become my only goal.
I’m just trying to get a headset, so I can focus on lessons.
Now he’s a thief at home.
This is ridiculous.
When my mother beat me to the point where I was about to give up, I heard the sound of the computer:
“Chou, what are you doing? Stop it! I’m sorry.
“Chou, are you all right?”
“Chou Hope”? Do you need a teacher to call the police? I’m sorry.
It’s the teacher Liu who’s giving us online lessons.
I didn’t turn it off. She heard me. She’s trying to stop my mom.
But my mom’s mad. How can she listen?
Mr. Liu is anxious:
Zhou, for whatever reason, you’re breaking the law. I’m sorry.
My mother heard that, and finally, the fury flashed through her face.
She looked at me and went to the computer.
It took her a while to close the barley because she wasn’t very good at online.
After this, she’s lost most of her breath and looks back at me lying on the ground, and she’s impatient:
“What are you doing? Get up!
“Didn’t I just push you twice? Still trying to play dead?
“I told you Zhou Zhou, I’m your mother! It’s me who raised you. Remember! I’m sorry.
After that, she went out and called my brother and started eating.
Let me lie in a mess.
And she should eat, drink, like, nothing happened.
Maybe it’s a guilt. Maybe it’s a guilt. My brother ate half, and he finally hesitated to ask my mother:
“Mom, should I ask my sister to come out for dinner? She doesn’t seem well…”
And my mother groaned and threw her chopsticks at my door:
“Whatever, like it or not!
“And besides, she just stole the money. Why are you here for dinner? I’m sorry.
One mention of stealing money.
My brother’s having trouble again and he can’t talk anymore.
I watched the scene with cynicism and laughed.
When I got up from the floor, closed the door and had no strength to clean up, I sat on the bed and looked out the window and looked all night.
The next day, the news blew up.
Yesterday, I was recorded by my classmates and someone posted it online.
Title: “A girl in her first year of high school steals money and is raped by her mother during her online classes!” The students and teachers of the entire class are covered.
The whole 15-minute recording was full of my mother’s punches and kicks and my screams.
All night long, my mom took me to a hot search…
3
After the hot search, a lot of netizens were asking me about my health and denouncing my mother’s assault.
“Did you go to the hospital? Heartache little sister. I’m sorry.
“As a senior dog, I wish I could work with my sister to get into a good college and leave this demon! I’m sorry.
“What can I say to the child? What’s the age of domestic violence? I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
My eyes are sour and dry all night.
I flipped through the reviews and saw the comforting encouragements and my throat was sorely clogged.
I’m surprised I’m still touched by these warm words, even crying.
I wasn’t alone in the past.
Just those voices of concern don’t give me real good luck.
When I was little.
One time, my brother was hanging out with Mom and Dad and said he wanted to eat a new barbecue.
It’s expensive. Mom and Dad think it’s too expensive to take us kids.
But the brother was so violent that they couldn’t stop him.
I’ll always remember, when I put my hat on and went out with my parents…
My mother suddenly turned back and said:
“I hope you can do your homework at home and cook for you when we get back. I’m sorry.
I was blindfolded.
Turns out my mom didn’t want to take me with her.
My father was still holding my hand, and his lips moved, as if he wanted to say something.
But he’s so bored, my mother always decides.
So he let go of my hand.
It was my brother who asked me first, curiously:
“Mom, why don’t you take your sister with you?
“Didn’t sister eat dinner?”
My mom looked at me like that.
And in that sight We found a moment of disobedient.
Maybe it’s the brother’s request.
Even though she didn’t want to, she ended up saying:
“All right, let’s go. I’m sorry.
So I followed my mother and brother, like a gift, into that very expensive restaurant.
My mother is a man who won’t lose.
In order to get the buffet back on the table, she had to pick up all kinds of big fish and fill a large table.
My dad told her to take less. She didn’t listen.
Even the waiter couldn’t help but remind her:
“Sir, please take the order, don’t waste it.
In addition, according to the rules of the store, if a customer wastes more than 20 grams of food, the settlement requires extra money. I’m sorry.
My mom was so mean to the waiter:
“I know! If we take it, we can eat it! We don’t need it.”
As a result, our family ate only half a table and couldn’t.
The rest of the meat is cooked, and it can’t be returned.
My mother had no place to go, and she pointed at my plate and said,
“Only you eat the least. I’m sorry.
She said, like a garbage dump, she put the rest of the meat in my plate:
“Eat quickly, don’t go home without eating all.” I’m sorry.
My dad saw her and pulled her:
“Come on, put some money in it. I’m sorry.
My mom was staring at my dad:
“Add? If she can’t eat, why do you have to come with me? I’m sorry.
When my dad was trained, he was quiet again.
“Mom, I can’t eat anymore. I’m sorry.
I said it carefully.
In a moment, my mother looked at me like she was looking at a loser.
She personally grabbed the barbecue, stabbed me in the mouth, squealed:
“Do you know how much it costs? Zhou, don’t be shy!
“A few hundred dollars of self-help, you can’t even eat 20 bucks!
“Look how good your brother is, how much he eats. Look at you again. What a loser! I’m sorry.
I was still young.
I don’t understand. It’s my brother who’s coming to help himself.
Why did I end up wrong?
I was scared of my mom’s face and cried.
This cry drew the attention of a lot of people around and my mom got even more angry.
She thinks I lost her face.
Before, when she tried to kill me, she used to look at outsiders, usually at home and close the door.
But that time she couldn’t help it.
She turned my ear in public and she pulled my hair:
“Why are you crying?
“How many times have I told you? Don’t cry in public!
“How could I have given birth to such a terrible thing? I’m sorry.
That year, I was eight.
I’m still young, but I’ve learned one thing.
My dad couldn’t protect me.
And every time he only preached with a squall of mud, and made himself appear.
But he’s actually more afraid of my mom than I am.
And my mother, she regretted having my daughter since early.
She thinks I can’t do anything.
I’m wasting my money, even going out to help myself.
No matter what I do, I’ll never beat my brother.
4
Kids have a lot to understand.
But I understand that when my mom gets angry, I get beat up.
Eight years old I couldn’t resist my mom’s slaps.
I want my mother to hold me like a brother and hold my hand.
In order not to be beaten, I tried so hard, so clumsyly, to make her happy:
“Mom, I was wrong.
“Don’t be angry, I won’t waste your money.
“When I grow up, I’ll make a lot of money for you!
“I don’t cry, don’t strangle me, okay? I hurt!”
I’m talking and I’m trying to stick something in my mouth.
But my tears are like a dyke.
Worst of all, my mother listened to me, not only not to get down, but to get worse.
She’s holding on to anger and asking me:
“Who taught you to say this in front of an outsider?
“Why are you crying? What are you pretending to be?”
I didn’t know what I was saying.
Why am I pretending?
I just want to beg her.
But I said the wrong thing.
The customers around started to talk about her:
“How does this mother teach children? Why doesn’t Dad care? I’m sorry.
“How can you treat a boy like that for a girl? I’m sorry.
“Yeah, I can tell by the way, this mother always yells at her at home. I’m sorry.
I heard those words.
My parents can hear it too.
My dad didn’t do anything.
And my mother looked at me with anger, and the hate in her eyes almost became real.
Finally, someone can’t help but talk to my mother:
“Stop strangling the baby. She’s young. I’m sorry.
“Yeah, if it breaks up, you’re in pain, too? I’m sorry.
“You’re a smart girl and you’re going to have to pay for it! I’m sorry.
That waitress sister pulled me aside.
She rubbed my tears, passed me a chocolate, smiled at me:
“Sister, don’t cry. I’ll give you chocolate. It’s sweet. I’m sorry.
Remember, that sister’s smile is sweeter than chocolate.
But the warmth is always short.
Instead, my mother took me home in anger.
And then she closed the door…
Late slaps and scolding will fall on me again.
With more weight.
And with even more cursing.
5
This year, I was 18 years old.
My father was hospitalized, spent all his savings, and started to depend on my mother for money to keep him alive.
He’s too busy, of course not to worry about me.
And my mom hit my tape and spread it all over the network.
At first, the netizens encouraged me to bring me a feeling.
But soon, my mood changed.
And I began to dazzle,
My mom doesn’t usually go online.
I don’t know if it’s lucky or unfortunate.
I wanted her to see the comments of the netizens, but I was afraid that she would know.
Soon, my anxiety became reality.
I don’t know if my classmates leaked it on purpose, or if they’re too powerful.
We didn’t even have one morning, and our location and unit number were removed.
Suddenly…
“Dum, boom, boom.”
Knock on the door.
My heart is shaking and staring out the door.
Someone’s coming.
My mom needs to know she’s hot.
Six.
The first person to come is a security guard.
He said that the property phone had been blown up by netizens and that a number of people had reported that she had abused her daughter.
Even the neighbours are complaining, so let her be careful.
Immediately thereafter, the local council came to the door.
Two aunts tried to reason with my mother and tried to do my mother’s mind work.
My mom’s very obnoxious, and she looks at me from time to time, and she’s bored.
Before my aunts left, they touched my head with compassion.
They seriously told me that if they needed to, they could go to them or call the police themselves.
I was just saying “um.”
Call the police?
I’ve tried that before.
It’s just that the police are here.
The police had to do their best to reprimand and warn my mother, like them.
When the police leave, my mother will laugh at me and call the police.
Wait for me, is hungry.
I’ll be disqualified from eating at the table that day.
Nothing’s going to change.
Events are always in a terrible cycle between bad and worse.
After they left, my mother went to see the heat.
She flipped and looked worse.
Finally, staring at me with a hateful eye.
Sure.
She didn’t think she was wrong.
She’s just pissed off by her netizens and can’t wait to get rid of it.
That afternoon, she asked my brother to videotape her:
“The child’s father has urine poisoning, dialysis every week and is under particularly stress at home.
“I hope this kid’s been lying and stealing since he was a kid.
“His father was still in the hospital, and she stole his father’s life money!
“I can’t help but teach the child…”
My mom cried red in front of the camera.
It’s like hating me.
But when the video was over, she returned to a state of indifference, leaving only one sentence:
“I’m in trouble. I’m sorry.
When my brother was about to release the video, I went up and grabbed his sleeve:
“Don’t print it?”
My brother squeezed his cell phone and he was so impatient:
“Why didn’t you turn off wheat when Mom hit you? Did you do it on purpose?
“Now even my classmates know, it’s embarrassing! I’m sorry.
I waited and said:
“I stabbed you?
“Who stole the money, Zhou Woo, dare you? I’m sorry.
My brother was lying for a second, and then he laughed:
“If you can tell Mom, do you think she believes you? I’m sorry.
Zhou-woo has no fear.
Because he’s right.
It’s not just stealing money, it’s a lot more, it’s happening in three days.
I resisted, explained too many times, and my mother didn’t believe me.
She scolded me for insulting my brother.
One time I even taped it to my mother with evidence.
She still doesn’t blame her brother.
I’m the only one who’s so mean.
In her heart, her precious son will always be handsome and kind, and I am a burden of trouble.
Zhou-woo did not hesitate to turn on the phone.
He took that video, he took it with him, he ordered it.
I stood there and saw him with a smile of provocation.
I’m cold.
7
After the video came out, the wind changed.
Guided by my mom’s speeches, the topic shifted from “family rape” to “saving money”.
In the morning, I was defending my netizens, and in the afternoon, I was accused.
“Did you steal Dad’s life money?” I was talking to her this morning! I’m sorry.
“Some kids just don’t know how to fight. I’m sorry.
“Doesn’t promote domestic violence, but it’s more shameful to be unbehaved. I’m sorry.
“Not all children are good. At the beginning of a human being, sexual evil. I’m sorry.
I was overwhelmed by the scolding.
My cell phone was leaked, a couple of strangers called, and the other one said:
“Your father’s dying. You stole money. You deserve to be beaten. You have no conscience! I’m sorry.
I was numb to press.
In fact, there are some kind of netizens who are identifying for me.
That’s when my mom came in with the phone.
She pointed it at me, and she read it to me one by one, and she was so proud of her face and tone.
I know, she wants me to submit.
Revenge her will cost you.
“Chou-woo, look at what they’re saying to you now. I’m sorry.
I held her in my arms:
“So, Cao So-sook, are you satisfied now? I’m sorry.
My mom probably didn’t think I’d run her over and call her by her name.
When she stopped and returned to her eyes, she was angry and slapping me again.
I reached out unconsciously.
But this time, the expected slap fell.
I looked up and I saw my mom staring at that bruise on my head.
That’s what she did yesterday.
Only see–
She had a moment of confusion and tension in her face.
I even caught something in her eyes… heartache?
I can’t help but think she’s gonna hurt me, too?
But if I don’t look carefully, her eyes are getting cold again.
She smiled:
“Who will look at these wounds?” Don’t you know how to handle it?
“Zhou Zhou, did you do it on purpose? What did you pretend with me? Was it bad for you?”
I’m standing there.
I looked at her carefully for a few seconds and laughed.
I bend my back and look at my mother with a smile:
“Yeah, I’m all fake.
“Soft Cao, your eyes are as good as your torch, and your eyes are golden.”
“I’m just pretending to make myself so disgusting.
“I am not worthy to be your daughter, okay? I’m sorry.
My mom slapped me in the face again.
“I’m so sorry to have you!
“I knew you were such a child. I was worse than you! I’m sorry.
My face is swollen, my pain is swollen.
But my laughter grew, and at the end, I looked up with tears:
“Well, then as you wish…
“At least I wasn’t born. I’m sorry.
I took the door.
Back then, for 18 years, I heard her say so many times:
“Go away, you better go far away!
Don’t come back!
8
I can’t tell how many times I left home.
Come to the roof and turn on the live.
“I’m in charge of online domestic violence. I’m a senior girl.
This is my title for myself.
In ten minutes, the title attracted a large audience.
“On the air? What about the eyeballs?”
“The home thief who stole the money. I’m sorry.
“Did your mother return the money? I’m sorry.
“The face is swollen like a pig’s head. I’m sorry.
“Why didn’t your mother kill you? You don’t want enough money, you want to make a live show? I’m sorry.
I looked at the curtains, and I ignored them, and waited in silence.
The number is increasing.
They asked me why I was on the air without talking.
They asked me if I had a head attack.
I’m still waiting.
About half an hour later.
Until the number of viewers is almost over a million.
I finally laughed at the camera:
“What proof do you have that I’m the one who stole the money?
“You’re just a bunch of dogs, just a wall.
“My father’s life money was stolen by my brother, not me at all.
“You scolded the wrong man.
“That’s right. Aren’t you the greatest? Then go check on my brother. I’m sorry.
After the revenge speech, I turned it off.
9
The roof’s windy.
But it makes people cold.
I’ve thought about it a hundred times and I’ve thought about giving up the struggle.
But I am also well aware that the world should not be like this.
Why would so many people want me dead just for words?
I’m not the fucking one.
I just want someone to help me.
I don’t like it, that’s why I have to tell the truth.
I wanted to turn to the community for help, so I opened it.
If you fall, you’ll be crushed.
That’s nothing.
10
I calmed down and took a deep breath.
But while I’m trying to get back on the air and keep going…
There’s a shadow in the dark!
It was a man dressed in black with a mask and a hat.
He recognized me and called out my name:
“Chou hopes. I’m sorry.
I’m conscious that this man is in grave danger.
Who are you? What are you doing?
I was talking and trying to call the police.
The phone was connected and the person noticed.
He came at me fast.
I only had time to scream “Help” at the trigger, and my phone was blown off.
The man held me down and laughed in my ear:
“What, you dare to live on the air and you dare not die?
“I called you this afternoon, remember?
“You don’t steal money enough. You want to use live eyeballs!
“You want to pin it on your brother and your mother? Fucking bad girl!
“I knew you wouldn’t die, so I came to give you a ride! I’m sorry.
It was the afternoon when you called to curse my extremist Internet friend.
Turns out he lives around here.
He tried to kill me!
He strangled me dead.
I fought hard until I couldn’t breathe.
He smiled at me.
Then he pushed me off the roof.
Eleven.
28 floors is about 84 meters.
Free fall takes about 4.1 seconds.
The night sky has a moon.
I looked at the moon and started to count:
Four, three, two…
By the last second, I saw it as if it was no longer the moon.
It’s the countdown on the blackboard for 100 days.
I secretly wrote it on my notebook, so I have to take a test at the university, to change the bad state of things.
It’s when you’re trying to give up, you knock on my head at the table, and you say, “Come on, don’t be lazy.” I’m sorry.
It was the boys next door who went through the door of the classroom and accidentally looked at him, and I looked down and he laughed at me.
I thought my world was a long night.
I tried to grab a ray of light.
And yet he was too weak to take me away from the darkness.
So I thought about giving it to the sun.
But I didn’t understand until this moment.
Turns out I’ve met a lot of lights.
More than that.
The light meets in thin hours and becomes the moon in my world.
I’m trapped.
I forgot to look up.
As soon as the image turns…
Finally, the world is silent.
4.1 End of seconds.
Bang!
The sky cracks, falls apart.
The moon is broken.
12
Why didn’t you look up?
The moon’s always there.
It’s not warmer than the sun, but it really shines on me.
I wanted to live.
How ridiculous.
Having struggled so many times to get out of jail.
And then I died in the hands of a stranger.
13
My soul is back home again.
Only this time, my mother and brother couldn’t see me.
My mom’s been so angry, she’s been talking about me.
My brother was impatient to ask:
“Mom, my sister ran out before cooking!
“Why don’t you stop her? Even if I fell, I’d have to cook first. I’m starving. I’m sorry.
My mom grunted:
“Don’t worry, she doesn’t have a place to go. Every time she’s in the hall, she’ll be back.
“Eat some snack mattresses and let her cook when she gets back. I’m sorry.
Oh, yeah.
I did come back.
Except, this time, I didn’t come back to cook for them.
Zhou-woo and I went to school together. My parents used to work at the factory. They couldn’t cook for my brother.
For a long time, they get used to it.
They don’t care if I take a break at home, or if I’m about to take a high test.
The funny thing is, I made all the food.
But every time I upset them because of that little shit, my mom wouldn’t let me eat at the table.
Right now.
I really want to know.
I’m not here. Are they always so hungry?
How long are they going to take it?
Too bad, soon, they won’t be able to eat.
Because of the video I broadcast, I pushed it to my brother’s phone.
14
Zhou was staring at the phone screen in a panic.
He’s scared and seems to want to tell my mom, but he’s talking to her, and he’s sulking again.
Yeah, how dare he?
I made it clear on the air that he was the thief.
After a few minutes, Zhou-woo was stuck with his cell phone, and finally he couldn’t stand it.
He gave his phone to my mother with a hard scalp:
“Mom, my sister she just started live.
“I think that’s the top of the building.
“She can’t be, can she? I’m sorry.
My mother looked down, and the little video that taped my last words was repeated several times.
In the end, she gave Zhou-woo her cell phone back and shook her head in cold:
“She just wanted to throw the dirty water on you so that the netizens could turn their backs on you.
“She’s got a wild heart, she’s always wanted to go to college, so she can’t get away from us.
“Wait. She’ll be back in a minute. I’m sorry.
I have to say, my mom was right about that.
I’ve struggled a thousand times every time to save myself.
– If I hadn’t met the killer.
And now I’m dead.
And the thing that’s bothering me most.
From the beginning to the end.
My mother didn’t even remember to ask Zhou-woo if he was the one who stole the money.
Zhou-woo is in such a state as to be a man.
I saw Zhou-woo’s finger shivering to flip the comment.
The sonic scolding filled the screen.
There’s even a human on the Internet who has his picture.
My parents have been protecting my brother for over a decade.
My mother’s face is no longer the same as the past.
When the incident involved her most precious son, she finally panicked:
“How dare you do this to her?
“When she comes back, I’ll have to teach her a lesson! Does she have any family left? I’m sorry.
Just for the next second, my brother’s face is white.
He was staring at his phone, whispering:
“Mom, you can’t teach her a lesson. I’m sorry.
My mom’s frowning:
“What? I’m sorry.
Zhou Zhou wrangled his lips and spitted out three words:
“She died. I’m sorry.
My mom took my phone to see it.
So, just now, another one of the pushers came out…
On the other hand, the Internet users have died on Monday.
The police announced that the deceased had called the police for help before he was alive, not excluding him from killing.
My mom shook her hand, her phone fell on the floor, and the screen broke.
She’s pale, and she’s still trying to deny it:
“No way, no way!
“How could she die?
That’s not her!
Then the police came to knock.
They told my mother and my brother in a complicated way that they could identify the body.
The police reminded them that I fell from the roof of 28 and died so badly that they were prepared.
My mom still wouldn’t believe it, and she insisted it was a mistake, not me.
Until they followed the police to the scene.
My mother watched me bleed for seconds…
She was crying hysterically and scolded:
“This girl with no conscience!
“I raised you for 18 years. Is that how you repay me?
“O long, my hope, my hope…”
She cried out my name.
I was listening, and suddenly remembering, my mom hasn’t called me “Leave.”
She calls me full name when she’s angry.
When I’m not angry, I’m basically called “you” and “hi”.
My mother cried, she didn’t come up, she fell down.
He fainted.
The police are desperate, and my brother is the only one left to follow.
My brother had to look at me with his skin.
Just one…
“Uh! I’m sorry.
He threw up.
15
In the end, the man who collected my body was my father.
My mom wakes up and all she does is cry.
My brother threw up as soon as he saw me.
He said he was afraid of nightmares and had no courage to touch me.
Half a day later, he remembered my dad.
My dad got word in the hospital, and he came up in panting.
His urea is already tiring from his kidneys and his lungs, his face is bad, his chest coughs are suffocated by a few steps, and the whole person has become a skeleton with little power left.
My brother didn’t do anything, he went far away.
My mother, Cao Soo-sook, was staring at me.
My dad’s the only one who’s been up to it. The police are doing a great job.
I look at this scene and it’s just ridiculous.
So that’s my parents’ big son in hand.
My dad touched me in the face with his rough hands as he wiped the dirty blood.
He choked and softly asked:
“Looking forward, it hurts, doesn’t it?”
It hurts? I’m used to it.
What hurts more than dying is how hard I’ve lived.
“Wish, do you blame Daddy? Sorry, Dad’s late.”
Late?
Did you really come here?
Where were you that night when I was scolded by Cao Sook?
You’re pretending you can’t see, can’t hear.
You’re hiding in the bathroom, in the bedroom, in the chess room for fear of anger.
“I hope you sleep, it won’t hurt…”
But I didn’t fall asleep.
Death is not my end.
I’m still here.
I can’t rest in peace.
16
I was tested by the police and died in a crash.
But there were signs of resistance.
Plus the last minute before I died, I called the police for help, so the police concluded that the perpetrator had committed the crime.
The police returned my body to my family.
I was sent to the funeral home to cremate overnight.
Soon, the city was unsealed.
Teacher Liu came to visit home.
She said with her red eyes:
“I can’t help but feel that I wanted to visit home yesterday.
“But my daughter had a fever and I stayed with her until today.
“I didn’t expect something to happen to Zhou. I’m sorry.
Mr. Liu spoke about my grades:
“Although her performance has declined a little over the past few days, she will only insist.
“With her grades and perseverance, there’s still a lot of hope for a 985 college.
“It’s my fault I didn’t come to see Zhou yesterday, and if I came, maybe you wouldn’t have done this…”
In the course of the home visit, Mr. Liu was unable to control his regrets and suffered several times.
And my mother and my brother sat silently on the couch.
My dad’s holding on, he’s tired and he’s in pain.
At first glance, I thought Mr. Liu was my mother.
It wasn’t until Teacher Liu left that Cao Sook-sook suddenly asked:
“You used to say 985 what was that? I’m sorry.
She never cared about my studies.
The parents will not go if they can.
The teacher made several calls to communicate with her, and she was particularly impatient.
The teacher complimented me, and she will rebut:
“What’s good for girls to learn?
“So her brother would buy a house and marry a daughter-in-law, and she would be able to make a difference. I’m sorry.
And when she heard that my grades had fallen, it was like she caught something and I dropped out of school.
Now, suddenly she’s thinking about what 985 is.
Mr. Liu will look at her and speak with seriousness and heavyness, as if he were holding on to killing my mother in words:
“It’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Qinghua, it’s Zhonghua, it’s Zhonghua, it’s Zhonghua, it’s Zhonghua, it’s Zhong Zhu, it’s Zhong Zhong Zhu… I’m sorry.
Cao Soo-sook stood in place with skill.
After Mr. Liu left, she went out of her mind and turned back, tripped to the chair and fell on the floor.
She screamed in pain and twisted her back and asked for help.
Once upon a time, when she was sick and took care of her, it was always on me.
But now…
My dad’s tired on the couch.
My brother is running away from reality, playing games crazy, even less thinking about her.
Cao Suk-sook screamed and said, “No one listens to me.”
“I hope, my hope…
“This heartless bitch!
“You haven’t made a lot of money, you haven’t given me a living!”
“How dare you die! “O wolf with white eyes!”
My father suddenly opened his eyes and looked at her in a rage:
Enough!
“You haven’t been scolded enough for years?
“If you don’t harm her, do you know?
“Everyone’s dead. You blame her?”
My mom was yelled at.
How could she?
She struggled to hold the table up and pointed at my dad’s nose:
“Chou, did I give you a face?
“You’re sick now, and you can’t blame me for making money.
“Wish to be killed, blame me? I didn’t mean for her to die! How did I get her killed? I’m sorry.
She yelled at her, ran over and tried to slap my dad in the face.
However, my father, who had always been a coward, had once held her against her and pushed her away.
I watched my mother fall back on the ground, and behold!
Turns out she’s old too.
She’s not as powerful as she used to be, even a weak patient like my father can easily push her away.
I was so afraid when I was little.
But more than a decade of pressure on education has made me accustomed to insinuation.
My father looked at my mother, cold and angry:
“From now on, you don’t have to kill me.
“I can’t cure it, I can’t cure it!
“I’d rather go down earlier than look at your face! I’m sorry.
I’m listening, watching, just feeling like this house is a farce.
Very ironic.
With me?
Great.
I’ll be far away from you in my next life.
17
Police investigations are highly efficient.
Not a few days later.
The killer got caught.
It’s the first time that I’ve been raped, I’ve been incriminating, and I’ve called to curse those who insult me.
He’s a unemployed traveler living near our neighborhood.
The man, in his 40s, was in the same condition as my father, suffering from urine poisoning and having no money to treat him.
He had been abandoned by his children and had suffered from psychological problems.
He doesn’t know the truth.
Having seen some statements online, he concluded that it was my fault and killed me.
After the truth was revealed.
There was an intense debate about my death, and there was all over the Internet the voice of condemnation of Keyboard Man and Wallhead.
Those who used to laugh at me deserve to be killed have disappeared.
As if the world’s netizens had begun a new round of justice.
But are the blacks really gone?
Maybe they just exist in a different way.
Cyberstorms happen every moment.
Never really stopped.
Zhou-woo’s underpants are all gone.
There were flowers and candles all over my door.
My mom’s got some ass too.
Once upon a time, Zhou-woo could not learn in reality, but could kill in the game.
But now he can’t even play the game.
Because the Internet got his every game account, IP address.
But as soon as he hits, he’ll be scolded and killed.
Netizens even took out Zhou-woo’s new commemorative skin from the game, which was run the previous two days.
The full value of $1888 is required to be attached to the player.
My mom’s been yelling about losing money.
And that’s exactly what banker Kari was brushed off.
Everything’s right.
This money, my mom’s salary for almost half a month, would have been enough for my dad to do five or six blood dialysiss in the hospital.
Zhou was squandered.
Every day after the truth came to light, netizens attacked him in their emails, tweets, cell phone text messages –
Da filial son, you are such a good father! I’m sorry.
“Did you enjoy the game? Did you pretend to be in the game when your sister got your back? I’m sorry.
“The thief!”
“You’re so full of shit, you’ll be a pair of panties in your next life. I’m sorry.
“Your sister’s calling for your life!” I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
It’s all very visible.
There’s more to be cursed.
The heat of domestic violence is high.
Zhou-woo’s name and information are on various platforms.
He was threatened 24 hours by a text message.
The whole thing got nervous and angry.
Cao Soo-sook loves his son.
Zhou-woo cooks with a backache.
It comforts him not to be afraid. It’s just the tip of the air and everything will pass.
So the egg fried rice was in front of Zhou-woo, and he just took one bite and knocked it over.
“It’s awful! Can you cook? I’m sorry.
The pottery bowl was broken into pieces and rice was adhesived to the floor.
My mom looked at Zhou-woo in shock.
She doesn’t seem to understand how her favorite little boy can treat her like that.
But I watched it in cold, but I wasn’t surprised.
Zhou was just like her.
It’s self-centered, mouse-eyed, violent, angry.
It’s just that Zhou Woo-ping was spoiled by her.
She almost met his needs from childhood to age without seeing the side of Zhou-woo.
Once Zhou-woo’s demands are not met, that’s the beginning of her nightmare!
What she thinks Zhou-woo wants now is a bowl of fried rice and a little bit of comfort?
18
My mom was on the ground, and she was packing up her tears:
“You’re in a bad mood.
“But you shouldn’t have let it out on me. I’m your mother.”
Zhou-woo is even more upset when she talks.
When he waited for her to clean up, he broke her up in anger:
“Get the fuck out of here! Leave me alone!”
After that, Zhou-woo opened the live radio with his cell phone.
He couldn’t resist the cursing online.
He wants to yell back…
He learned me before, took a very smoky title.
After drawing the audience to the live studio, he started to pick up his friends:
“My sister died because of that stupid murderer. What do I care?
“And she was a bag! If she really hates me, why wouldn’t she hit my mom?
“My mother used to beat her up, keep her from eating, keep her from school and don’t give her money.
“You’re going to yell at my mother. Didn’t you hear her?
“What’s wrong with me stealing money? It’s called taking!
“My mom didn’t blame me. You’re on the Internet.
“My father’s illness is not gonna make it! Is he worth two grand?
“My mother is a fool! It’s a waste. I’m sorry.
He’s inherently impulsive.
His face is completely exposed.
Zhou’s friends were so angry that they were recorded and distributed to social platforms.
The whole network is mocking him as “The Great Son of the Century”.
This time he really died of his parents.
And my mother, Ms. Cao Sook-sook, has been looking at Zhou for a long time.
All of a sudden, she’s acting like she’s going crazy, and she’s on the air, and she’s heading for Zhou-woo!
She slapped Zhou-woo hard.
Get his ear.
Hit his cheekbones.
Just like when I was hit.
Only this time, she cried while beating Zhou-woo.
Every one of them is complaining:
“Who have I been for all these years?
“You little bastard, Zhou-woo! So you’re the white-eyed wolf!
How dare you steal money!
“Give it back! Give your sister back!
“Give me back my hope!”
“My hope… she died so badly…
“For you, I wronged my hopes…
“She could have gone to Qinghua North…
Unfortunately, Zhou-woo wasn’t me.
He’s been through this since he was a kid?
He’s stronger than me, more indifferent and selfish than me.
He put up with it for a little while, and he got up and kicked my mom on the floor.
“Damn it or not! I’m sorry.
The floor was full of porcelain bowls and rice grains, and my mother fell down on her face.
Just fell on that pile of debris.
She was lying on the ground snorting in pain, with blood all over her face.
But Zhou-woo was on fire these days.
After he did it, he was in the middle of it.
As my mother begged for forgiveness, he kicked her again and again.
He’s been watching me for so many years, how my mom taught me how to be violent every day.
My mom was his best teacher.
He was even “black for blue” better than blue.
Soon, my mother’s face, her hands and even her neck were scratched with those pieces on the ground.
I didn’t find out until my dad came to stop it.
There’s one in my mother’s eye.
She cried helplessly and sheds tears of blood.
But the rest of the leftovers and the crumbs of the dishes that she had handed to Zhou-woo.
Now, the attack on her became a bloody wound.
She cried and cried my name in pain:
“Blessed and long, Mother is sorry, Mother is mistaken
“I hope, you come back…”
From the beginning to the end, I stand by.
She can’t see me.
She’ll never see me again.
19
Some netizens called the police.
My mom was dragged into the hospital.
She ruined her face.
Total loss of left eye.
There’s something wrong with the gods.
My dad couldn’t survive. He was notified.
They were lying in the hospital and there was no one on the side of the bed.
And they have always believed in old age.
But they are their favorite sons.
Zhou-woo was educated several times by the police and later went to school.
He’s been walking around like a street mouse.
Later, he was hanging out with a bunch of punks, drinking and gambling every day.
In a few days, he stabbed someone for a moment.
He became a juvenile offender and went to juvenile detention.
That day, he was only 16 years old.
He was supposed to be a very active young boy, who turned into a mess.
20
After my dad died.
My mother was demented, relatives didn’t want to take her in, and she ended up in a mental hospital.
It’s a famous madhouse in our city, with all kinds of people in it.
I feel my soul is lightening.
It’s about time to leave.
I last saw her in that madhouse.
As soon as I got in, I heard a lot of talk about her:
“It’s just that Cao So-sook. I’m sorry.
“Yeah, every time she sees a girl, she asks for hope and often scares her. I’m sorry.
“And when he appeared, he said that her daughter had passed Qinghua. I’m sorry.
People who don’t know the truth are curious to ask:
“Is her daughter so good? Really? Why don’t you come see her? I’m sorry.
People scorn it:
“What, Cao Sook-sook’s daughter died.
“Don’t you know the news? The third-year-old girl was raped by her family and then by the Internet, and she was killed after she tried to clarify it live.
“It was a good study, a good girl, and it ended like this. I’m sorry.
Finally.
All the talk begins with gossip and ends with strangulation.
I don’t know.
When I found her room silently, Cao Sook-sook was holding a pillow and singing lullaby.
She seems to have taken that pillow as a sting.
After being beaten by Zhou-woo, she was scarred and blinded with her left eye.
But her tone was gentle and sweet:
“Go to sleep, baby.
“The night has fallen.
“The bed is covered with roses.
“Sleep with you…”
Little hope, little baby.
“Mommy’s little hope…
“Mommy’s little baby…”
She was wearing a medical uniform, sitting in front of a window, and there was a sunset on her.
The familiar melody brought me back to childhood.
I was about five or six years old, and I wanted to sleep with her and hear her sing me a lullaby.
But she’s busy with her brother, eating with her brother, playing with her brother and telling her stories.
Those lullabys, she sings to her brother.
I’ve never been treated like this before.
So envious.
That year, I pulled her sleeves and asked:
“Can’t Mom leave her brother alone tonight? Can you get me some sleep?
“I want to hear the story, too, and I want to hear Mom sing.
“One night, just once, okay? I’m sorry.
But she was impatient to get rid of my hand.
Her tone is repulsive:
“How can you compare with your brother?
“How come you don’t know anything?
“You’re a sister. You can’t rob a brother. I’m sorry.
I know.
So I never asked again.
But I didn’t think that when I was a child, I couldn’t think of a lullaby, and she sang to me after my death.
But I…
It’s not rare anymore.
21
She’s still singing:
“Go to sleep, baby.
“The night has fallen.
“The moon shines on the earth.
“The breeze blows gently.
Little hope, little baby.
“Mommy’s little hope…
“Mommy’s little baby…”
Just as I was leaving, she suddenly stopped singing and looked in my direction.
“Hope!”
“I’m looking forward to coming back. Show Mommy!
“Hope…”
She came at me.
I’m stunned, I have to hide.
As a result, she pierced my body and jumped towards the young nurse who had entered the house.
The nurse seems to have gotten used to this scene and answered:
“Yes, yes, hope is back.
Sit down! Don’t move. It’s time for your shot. I’m sorry.
I don’t know.
She sat right down.
She had only one right eye, filled with tears, raised her hand and touched the face of the nurse lovingly.
She was in a virtual and ridiculous dream.
And I looked up at the light outside the window.
It’s time to leave.
(Preliminary text: finished)
Nan Qian, Redemption
I look for the light, I chase the sunset, I pass the lights.
On the way, I saw a room of stomp.
There’s a skinny little girl in there.
She was crying and was doing her own harm with a pencil knife.
I stopped.
I attached my soul to her, and she lost consciousness briefly.
I controlled her body and stopped her from moving on.
I bandaged her wound and took the medicine.
And on her notebook, write a few lines:
“I know, it’s dark.
“If you can’t find the sun, look up at the moon.
“The sun will always shine.
“You’ll grow up.
“will escape the plight.
“and will meet someone who loves you.
“He’s in the future.
“Try to wait for him.
“Okay?”
After all this, I left the girl.
She woke up and looked at the words on the notebook.
She held it and cried.
And finally, she took the pen, and under those words, she said one word:
“Good. I’m sorry.
(extra) Record number: YXA150 Allgysjl3MEGxSrvrg
I don’t know.
Keep your eyes on the road.
